Meredith heaved a light sigh, which almost hissed from her soft lips.
It was cool around there, on that summer day, despite the fact that she saw the warm rays of the magnificent sun beating hard on her pale and delicate skin, she felt the cold suddenly seize her from around her.
What would have happened at that moment? When she finally revealed the truth to Diane's family, no one had invited her there, no one was waiting for her, but she hoped, he felt a strong desire in her heart to find out more about her.
Meredith briefly closed her big, deep green eyes, the colour of fresh mint and the blurred colour of grass.
She was afraid and tense, she had to admit it, she felt this mixture of emotions turn her stomach, spin there like uncomfortable sensations for which she herself was not ready.
The door was open in front of her, she could see the entrance to the Stanley residence, the long corridor of it, the white and clean walls, the large window of solid glass that reflected at the end of the narrow corridor a landscape of sea, of the waves and the sun.
It was beautiful there, it reminded her a little of Ireland and her childhood with it, when she and her brothers took long walks on the beach accompanied by their respective guardians.
Meredith loved the sea, she loved its freshness, its salinity, the white foam of the waves that hit her legs until it wet her knees, she had always loved that feeling because in a certain sense it calmed her and freed her from all worries.
The lady lightly placed her hand on her abdomen, began to caress and massage it weakly and with affection.
Inside her womb something precious grew, a long-awaited child, the blood seal of a promise between families, the sacrifice she had agreed to pay for her freedom.
Even though she was in the first month of pregnancy, with the resulting fetus not even being larger than a bean, she immediately felt she was pregnant.
She had been pervaded by that sense of belonging and that knowledge that only a mother could understand, there was no need to wait for the subsequent retching or headache.
She was carrying prince Aleksei's legitimate child in her womb and that was enough to know.
Who that child would look like was only in her imagination, perhaps its father, perhaps its mother, or a mixture of the two, she had no idea.
Meredith knew she didn't have to get too attached to the baby, on the other hand she was only a surrogate mother and after the war, after giving birth to the baby it would soon be taken under the care of the nurse and most likely taken to Russia.
But she couldn't do anything about it, that feeling of connection between the two was strong, she couldn't help it, she was its mother on the other hand.
The woman's brown hair lay long, straight up to the back, tied only at the end by a thin dark greenish bow.
She waited there, in front of the front door of the house, she waited while the guards glanced at her, she hoped someone had let her in at least to get more news of Diane.
Meredith heard footsteps approaching, graceful, majestic, slow, ticking lightly on the woody parquet floor that characterised the entrance and most likely the rest of the mansion.
She found before her the refined figure of a woman, thin but still fit.
The eyes of the two met briefly, Meredith was younger enough than the other, enough that the woman could have been her mother.
That woman kept her many puffy black hair, sometimes squeezed by grey locks in many small and tight braids, which in turn were gathered into a larger ponytail at the nape.
The lady had a light and sincere smile on her face, so much so that for a few moments Meredith felt safe and understood by someone.
That must certainly be the lady of the house, Diane's mother.
-Welcome to the Isle of Man, my dear- greeted lady taking the hands of the young woman in her cold and delicate hands -Say then, how can I help you?-.
Meredith blushed for a few moments, placed on her sweaty and pale face a slight smile full of nervousness and tension.
She was waiting for Diane to welcome her, in case really that after all the bad experiences she decided to go again to Man but in a way she did not feel ready to talk to her Diane's mother about her own girlfriend.
-It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance, my lady, let me introduce myself, my name is Meredith Dustin, descendant of House Dustin, Earls of southern Ireland- the young woman stopped her words for a few moments, that situation was unexpected and somehow she had to try to put the sentences right in her mind.
-I came this far to pay you my regards of course and meet Diane eventually, if she were here-.
Meredith perceived with the corner of her eye how at her statement Lady Stanley had suddenly turned pale in the face, how the dark and delicate colour of the woman's skin had suddenly turned pale, almost taken by fear and despair.
Lady Mary anyway felt the pressure to be hospitable and kind and act like a lady of the house, so despite the sadness due to the memory of her daughter, she strove to put a sincere smile on her face.
-I'm sorry to admit that Lady Diane has not yet returned home, my stepsons are working on her research, however I cross my fingers that my daughter is safe and sound...- admitted the mother passing her gaze on the marble and white floor of the entrance, as she was still chatting with her hostess.
She felt the emptiness of her rise inside her, it was difficult to lose a daughter so suddenly, it was an unexpected situation for her but in her heart she hoped that wherever Diane was her she was healthy and doing good.
-Oh, I also hope that Diane is well, my lady, I hope so- Meredith held the woman's hands in her.
Having grown up in a family with four brothers, she soon learned how to handle her feelings and how to hearten the people who needed it at the time.
The mother's deep black eyes met hers again, her plump lips were caught in a faint smile.
-I am glad that you are so interested in my daughter, my lady- concluded lady Mary placing one of her hands on the guest's shoulder with a kind and friendly look -what title should I appeal you at this moment, for my daughter?-.
Meredith hesitated a few moments, bit her lower lip weakly so much so that she could vent her perplexity but at the same time not causing herself any pain.
She wasn't ready for this, for her official presentation in front of Diane's mother, but lying was not a quality she had so she let it out weakly from her lips.
-I am her partner...Diane, she is my girlfriend-.
The woman hesitated a few moments to answer, she did not know what that silence was due to, perhaps she had been too sincere with her, perhaps she would not have accepted it or perhaps she would not have taken her as part of the family and what if she had announced the news at the wrong time?
A mixture of emotions and unanswered questions mixed in Meredith's mind, what was she supposed to do now? She began to tremble, her eyes became wet, she felt she was about to fall into stress.
She felt the woman's hand weakly tighten around her shoulder, followed by a sweet and melodic laugh, which to the delight of the young woman seemed full of tolerance and affection.
-Oh, happy news you are giving me, my lady...- said lady Mary clutching her hand around the other's shoulder, much like a hug -let's be sincere with ourselves, no matter how rebel and stubborn my daughter was, I would have waited for her to remain alone for the rest of her life, spinster maybe but the fact that now she is with someone and no longer alone can only fill me with joy-.
Meredith smiled faintly, looked away, she was full of joy, her heart which in fear had started beating fast had now started to slow down, finding some peace.
-You do not like to be on the threshold I guess...- admitted the hostess opening the door to the young woman even more gently, thus letting her have a greater and more attentive look inside the house -excuse my manners, please, come in, come up with us to have a cup of tea, after your trip you are tired I guess-.
He did not want to look rude in the eyes of his future mother in law so he kindly accepted the invitation.
On the other hand the woman was right, the young lady was very tired and certainly in her condition, sitting down to drink a cup of hot and sweet tee would not have minded her.
Meredith entered the mansion and it was only after the heavy solid wooden door was closed behind her that she realised how large the place actually was.
The entrance and the corridor in direct sunlight certainly seemed smaller but from the inside it was as if the space had magically and suddenly increased.
-This way, the hall is on the upper floor- the woman led her up some stairs made of precious wood, which despite being richly made, creaked faintly under the graceful footsteps of the two women.
She knew very well how things could soon get ruined and lose their charm in a large family and like the Dustins, the Stanleys were numerous too.
Lord Stanley had had five children in his life, most of them illegitimate children born out of wedlock but in any case children raised in that mansion and most likely not exactly caring to descend the stairs in a noble and gentle way.
Meredith smiled again, placed her cold and delicate hand on her abdomen again, wondering if Diane, given her rebellious character was one of the reckless children, she imagined yes if she knew the girl well.
Immediately after walking up the staircase a second door of cherry wood was opened on the upper floor.
It was opened so much that the rays of the warm sun made it possible to see a living room, well arranged, small and with a noble and well-kept appearance.
Around the salon table were placed correspondingly padded armchairs with soft fabric and bright yellow of a saffron colour.
On one side of the room was also arranged an expensive and magnificent piano in a shiny black colour complete with a stool and a fireplace, formed by the composition of a thousand stones with colours ranging from dark brown to grey-white.
Another person sat on one of the armchairs, a woman who was few years older than Meredith.
That other guest of Lady Mary in some sense did not possess the classic British characteristics and indeed she seemed to exhibit much more of the Mediterranean characteristics.
The guest had hair down to just over her shoulders and of a golden brown colour with a hint of honey blonde in it.
She was dressed in a noble and majestic blue dress, the colour of the sea, the same colour of the eyes of her beloved Diane.
Meredith was not expecting someone else to be in that place at that moment, she hoped more in a private confrontation with the woman.
In any case, the young woman turned her gaze slightly behind the host's shoulders, enough to notice that the other guest's belly was swollen enough to give the appearance that the woman was pregnant at the fourth or fifth month.
As soon as it seemed to the guest that someone was entering her own room she was mainly taken by the natural impulse of fear, she jumped for an instant, raised her brown eyes to the strangers so that she could see who it was.
As soon as it became clear to the one that in reality the other ladies going to the room were none other than Lady Mary herself and another guest she got up as quickly as she could to introduce herself to the newcomer.
Meredith immediately placed a forced smile on her delicate face, she saw the active and kind nature of the other lady.
-Good day, Lady Mary Morley, it's a pleasure to see you again and certainly it's a pleasure to meet you too lady...- the guest asked, stretching one of her arms towards the lady almost with an effort, given her condition.
-Meredith...Meredith Dustin is my name- admitted the young woman placing a small and embarrassed smile on her lips, it seemed as if the guest repeated her name over and over again in her head, letting it sometimes come out of her pale lips.
-Dustin, like the Earls of Ireland- the guest finally admitted putting a smile full of pride and satisfaction on her own face -pleased to meet you Meredith, my name is Karassandra Richard but please call me Kara if you wish-.
Meredith smiled faintly, that situation was slightly embarrassing for her, she did not wait for other guests to be there at that moment and in any case she did not wish to disturb them.
She stood still for a few minutes, it was as if she could no longer move a muscle, as if she were immobilised for some time.
The lady turned her deep green eyes towards the window, towards what the glass reflected outside, she saw the sea, its foaming waves and watched the sun, warm, beating on her skin.
Meredith felt a hand, a cold touch settle on one of her shoulders, an unexpected sensation, enough to make her jump for a few seconds, make her be perplexed at least until she realised that that cold touch belonged to Lady Mary Morley.
She saw the smile on her face, it was full of joy and lightness, she knew she was trying to include her in every way in that meeting.
Lady Meredith blushed faintly on her cheeks for a few moments, looked away from the scene, rested her eyes on the woody and precious parquet floor that created a perfect contrast to the white walls.
-Come on, come on, dear, take a seat, don't worry just drink the tea, be part of the family as if you were in your own mansion- invited the woman, leading her second guest to one of the upholstered sofas and leaving for lady Dustin to rest her legs.
Meredith smiled for a moment, the sweetness of that woman who by now allowed herself to be identified as her mother-in-law thanks to her relationship with Diane.
She did not know what made the woman treat her as if she were her own daughter just the same day after meeting her, perhaps it was because her presence there reassured her, as if it guaranteed her that Diane, her long-lost daughter would certainly return one day.
The young woman observed the movement of the attendants, going out and entering the room, she understood all that movement was because of her, to guarantee as well as for the other ladies, a cup of precious and white porcelain with which to drink tea and maybe to bring another set of sweets to the table.
-Congratulations for the pregnancy, lady Karassandra- Meredith admitted with embarrassment placing her deep gaze towards the woman who at that moment was busy sipping the warm and sweet tea in calmness and caressing her large, swollen belly with one of her hands.
-Thank you- Kara smiled placing a slight look at her belly -four and a half months almost, I feel it kicking continuously- she smiled gently and gracefully placing her cup on the small saucer of white porcelain.
-Obviously there are children who really love to kick- the young lady Meredith smiled with sincerity and lightness, looking at her own belly with the corner of her eye, beginning of the second month, but still flat and hidden under a corset.
-I really hope this time it will be a girl...- admitted Lady Kara, ignoring a weak, embarrassed chuckle from her pale and dry lips as a woman who had already received enough experience -with my son Philip, frankly, I had to do a hard job to raise him…-.
-Sons are always the most complicated- Lady Mary Morley admitted with sarcastic words, also with the look of a woman who in her past had had to bear the burden of raising the illegitimate children of her own husband.
Those sarcastic phrases almost discouraged Meredith, in her past she had only given birth to a daughter, her Olivia, good heavens, how much she missed her little girl, her whole world...
It was not so easy to accept the bereavement of a child, she knew that she and her child were like one person, they had that bond, which only mothers have with their own children.
And now that her little girl was no longer there, no more alive, no more able to hold her to her, a new life was born in her, from a different father, but equally her child.
Life was really senseless sometimes, mothers suffered so much giving birth to them and then it took so little to lose them, no, it wouldn't happen again, with this baby it would be all different.
She would have protected it as she could and then she would hand it over to the child's rightful father, Aleksei.
-Lady...Lady Dustin, is everything fine?- asked Lady Kara with a worried look, noticing how now the young woman closed in her thoughts no longer responds to any impulse, any question.
The eyes of her group were now on her, they let her blush for a few moments.
- Of course, I...just...- the lady tried in a desperate attempt to reach the porcelain cup, leaving her trembling hands, letting it fall on the woody and smooth floor and letting the material of the utensil break into a thousand pieces.
Part of her tea had invariably slipped and spilled over her dress thus staining it.
It was all so embarrassing, when she thought about the past she was traumatised, she would start to shake and certainly do some trouble.
Meredith watched the yellowish hue of the liquid spread across the floor in an irregular patch until it reached the legs of the small upholstered sofa.
She covered her pale and delicate face with embarrassment, this time blushing completely, she could not express herself as she wanted, she could not speak, she was afraid, she had started to tremble.
-Oh my...I'm sorry Lady Mary, I'll pay for all this- the young woman apologised, thus giving the hostess time to approach the panic-filled lady too, to be able to console her, hug her, make her understand that everything was perfect as it was.
She was safe, she could feel how much Lady Mary's arms were wrapping more and more tightly to her, almost taking her breath away.
-Oh dear, do not worry, there is nothing to fear now that you are here with us, you understand? Do not fear neither for you nor for your child...- the woman admitted holding her tightly to her body, feeling under her dress almost the other's heart beating in her chest.
How did she know about her pregnancy? Her belly was still too flat to notice.
Did she know who the father was? Did she know about what had happened? How was she aware of it? That was perhaps why the two had formed an almost familiar alliance so early.
-I noticed how you carefully touch your belly, how you look at it, I'm close to you, Meredith and I'm sure Diane will feel the same way once she gets home-.
Lady Dustin placed her face lightly on the woman's shoulder, she noticed how behind her shoulders Lady Kara had placed a smile of apprehension on her own face, clenched her fist to her heart almost as if to make her understand her support.
Meredith closed her eyes for a moment, she felt protected, safe as she dipped her face into Lady Mary's shoulder.
That woman's dress smelled of perfume, honey, sweet flowers, lavender and herbs.
Yes she felt it, she would return, she would never leave her alone and in the end they could finally both become part of their one big family.