This is a work of fiction. Names, Characters, Business, Places, Events and Incidents are either the Products of the Author's Imagination or used in a Fictitious Manner. Any Resemblance to actual Person, Living or Dead, or actual is purely Coincidental

This story contains MATURE THEMES and EVENTS and STRONG/VULGAR/PROFANE WORDS that are NOT suitable for VERY YOUNG audiences

This story contains spoilers for FIXED MARRIAGE SERIES

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I wanted to stay longer but I still have some errands to do and taking care of the company's my priority right now, granting my father's wish. Gustuhin ko mang manatili para bantayan siya ay hindi pwede, dahil ayaw niya. He said he'll recover fast kung ang mga report sakanya ng secretary niya tungkol sa company ay maganda. There's nothing to worry about it, really. Lahat ng nagtatrabaho doon, totoo sakanya, and I can't imagine someone betraying our family. Especially him

"Kailan ho ba siya pwedeng umuwi? Mas gusto ko kasing nasa bahay nalang siya ng sa ganon ay mas maalagaan siya kahit ng mga katulong lang. Th rest of the family po kasi is still in Australia, kaya walang pwedeng magbantay sakanya dito ngayon"

"Don't worry. I'm sure you're dad will have a 'go signal' immediately after we made sure he's fine and ready to go home" sagot ni Doctor Chan kaya napatango nalang ako

I'm still talking with Doctor Chan about my father's condition when suddenly a familiar figure of a man 5 years ago stood in front of me. He changed a lot, mas lalo lang nadepina ang mga physical features niya. Lumaki din ang katawan niya. His eyes are still the same though, they're still cold as usual, and lastly, mas gwumapo siya

"Oh Mr. Ortigoza, naparito ka?" Tanong ni doctor Chan. Napalunok ako at umiwas ng tingin. So magkakilala sila...

Habang nag uusap ang dalawa 'di ko mapigilang tanawin ang itsura ng lalaking lubusan kong minahal sa buong buhay ko. Bigla akong nakaraman ng pisikal na sakit sa pulso ko

It makes me proud to see he's doing just fine after all, pero hindi ko rin mapaipagkakaila ang sakit na nararamdaman ko sa mga bagay na nangyari sa' min. It's still hurting me in so many ways every time I think about everything na parang kahapon lang nangyari

Kamusta na siya? Is he doing much better after I left? He should be right? Kase the last time I checked he's with... Mitch. She's not just his best friend nor childhood friend... She's someone dear to him, close to him. Probably by now baka sila na nga. It's not impossible to happen gayong batid kong magkasama na ulit sila

Before he could even notice, I looked away, scared that he might see the pain in my eyes. My tears are too shallow, it's too easy for him to notice them

I took a deep breathe and thought of saying goodbye, since mukhang madami pa silang pag uusapan

I was about to leave when doctor Chan speaked "ahh nga pala mr.Ortigoza , this is Santos Shamain, anak ng may ari ng SRC"

Shit

Napapikit ako ng mariin habang hindi nakatingin sakanila. I bit my lower lip as I looked at him only to find out he's been surveying my whole body, making me blush from shyness... bakit Elijah?

I've been going to gym for 5 years and I have the body, so there's nothing to be ashamed of. But just seeing at how he's looking at my body figure like I'm naked, makes me want to cover my whole body!... damn why!

When he locked his eyes on mine, taas noo niya kong tinignan, like I'm sort of a stray dog na kinakawawa lang niya. I can't let him know I'm still not doing fine after going away for 5 long years. I have to at least fake my feelings to let him know that somehow... nakayanan kong wala siya, nakayanan kong hindi siya isipin araw araw kahit na kabaligtaran iyon. That I'm still not doing fine, that I'm still missing him everyday of my life. Na hindi ko pa kaya. That I can't still move on

I tool all my courage at taas noo ko rin siyang tinignan with cold eyes and an arched brow

Habang nagsusukatan kami ng tingin, Doctor Chan can't help but notice the tension between us. Cold to cold. Of course, who wouldn't notice?

"Do you both know each other?" Tanong ni Doctor Chan

Of course wala nga palang alam si doc since he was only shifted here a year ago, so wala siyang alam sa nangyari noon. I think that's somehow a good thing. I bet he didn't tell him a thing, right? I mean why would he talk about me? It's not like I'm still someone important to him

It'll be rude to just neglect him and everything, mabait na naman ako, di naman ako ganon ka heartless para sabihing 'di ko kilala ang lalaking to... na minsan ng nagpatibok ng puso ko at siya lang ang may kayang gumawa non

Tinignan ko si doctor chan "Yeah, I know Mr.Ortigoza, Sean Elijah. Very well" I smiled at Doctor Chan kaya napangiti din siya

Not breaking his stares off me he said "Who could forget the girl who abandoned her supposed to be husband in the church" He said coldly

"I Hope life without a marriage and husband did you good " What? I don't get it. I didn't abandoned him. I never did. Not in the church. No

I was about to talk when he turn his back on us. Not letting me speak. Not even a bit

Nasaktan ako sa sinabi niya pero mas nasaktan ako sa parte kung paano niya sabihin yon. Nagawa man niyang sabihin iyon ng sobrang lamig, but what he felt never escaped the fact that he was hurt and I can see it right through his words. Behind those are the suffers, loneliness, misery and pain that he fought alone and it kills me to even think how he could barely make it. But can I say I felt those thing too? Na nahirapan din ako? Na pilit ko lang kinakaya so that someday I could stood proud in front of him and let him know na okay lang ako. Pero bigo ako, kasi ilang salita niya lang... nawasak na agad ang mga tapang na inipon ko sa loob ng limang taon. Then the next fight will all be about pride

Tears started to pool my eyes kaya habang tumitingin ako sa sahig kinuha ko ang opportunity to excuse myself from breaking down in front of these people who witnessed

"Doc mauna na ho ako" Sabi ko ng 'di siya tinitignan. I felt that he was about to say something but I just couldn't handle it anymore. So I walked away

Pagpasok ko sa sasakyan ko, kasabay ng pagbuhos ng ulan ay ang tuloy tuloy na pagpatak ng mga luha ko. Like a waterfalls, kahit anong punas ko doon alam kong 'di matutumbasan nito ang sakit na hinarap niya. After all mas masakit parin pala talaga kahit anong pilit kong sabihin sa sarili kong ayos na ang lahat

If only I was there. If only I have stayed. If only I had a choice... I wouldn't have gotten away

I'm sorry I was your doubted muse