Depictions of child abuse in this chapter please don't read it if you're uncomfortable with it.
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Katsumi unlocked the door to the room, it was small and rather basic but incredibly clean. In it was desk, a bed and a wardrobe with some storage cupboards scattered around here and there. This wasn't like anything he was used to. He smiled at its simplicity, it was oddly homely to him. He placed his keys aside and plopped himself on the bed, his head hurt… Not because of some strange mystical power but it was just too much. Not only that now he had to head home and face his mother, he didn't necessarily hate her, in fact he loved her and grasped at every thin strand of it she slightly reciprocated, believing she had changed and loved him back. That day still hasn't come and Katsumi kicked himself every time he fell for that trap but he simply just couldn't help it.
He let out a sigh, "What have I done?", he asked the air unaware that his voice would no longer fall on deaf ears.
"You have restarted your life, not on the best foot and it's confusing, but you will get the hang of it fairly quickly", Katsumi jumped, startled by the randomness of the voice, he swears he is going crazy. Just how much could she hear? However he just shrugged it off, a voice in his head was far from the scariest thing to him now, plus it's not like he thought about much anyway. "Don't worry, I can only hear you when I want to", she giggled sweetly and Katsumi's eyes widened but couldn't help but smile, her presence somehow lit up the empty space in him. He turned over, at least he wasn't completely alone anymore.
An hour passed before he built up the courage to go back 'home' and he was already half-way down the hill and into the city. He felt like his body just refused to go back but his mind knew he at least needed clothes, he prayed she would be knocked out on the sofa and she hasn't thrown up all over the house.
Once in the city he caught the closest bus back home with some change he had left in his back pocket, he knew to always leave a little left just in case he got stuck anywhere. His head raced almost as quickly as his heart did and it only got worse when the bus pulled up at his home. "Oh god" He mumbled as he opened the door, only to see a mine field of needles and bottles. The scent of booze and muck hit his nose once again but nonetheless his prayers were answered when he saw her limp body hanging slightly hanging off of the sofa, bottle in hand. He looked at her in pity every time he saw her like that.
He leapt and tiptoed over the obstacles and made his way upstairs, grabbing two bags that were just laid on the floor, along with everything else. His room was like a different world compared to his mothers, it was tidy, dirty but tidy. It was bare and it only had a stained mattress on the floor along with 2 sheets and small lamp beside it plugged into the wall but surprisingly no rubbish was left around but it still wreaked of grime and alcohol. He stopped at the door and compared the room at the shrine to this one and heard the loud snorts and snores of the woman downstairs. Maybe his life could be a little better, everything has a risk, he leant on the door frame and slid down it, cupping his face in his hands. Just what sort of life was he living before the accident, it all rushed him at once. It was like a wave of realisation hit him. As he looked around he understood why questioning whether his life was worth living was completely rational at the time. Maybe that's why Amaterasu picked him. He was disposable. This time no voice accompanied that thought.
Tears ran down his face but he couldn't help but smirk along with it, "Okay, if you want to take advantage like that then surely I can do the same, I've had enough of being a bread shuttle", he laughed through his sobs.
This time she did answer, "that was the idea, in fact its more beneficial for you than me", her usual bubbly voice was oddly dulled down, she sounded guilty once again. "You help me fight this war alongside the other shrine keepers and you get to live a life in which you are strong, how you decide to spend the time in between is completely up to you."
Katsumi's tears slowed down a little having realised she had a point, "You never mentioned a war", he ran his thin fingers through his raven black hair and sighed.
"I requested your help, you didn't ask what that entailed", she replied bluntly.
"That's true", he took his hands out of his hair and placed him in his pockets and pulled out his new keys. "You did give me my life back and you did make me stronger physically I know that much, I'm unsure about this whole 'soul wielding' stuff but according to Satoshi it's strong too". He swung the keys around his fingers and looked at the mess around him, "and you're the reason I have a much nicer room now". Katsumi could feel Amaterasu's smile and a warmth filled him once more.
"Soul wielding?…" Amaterasu laughed, "that's a new one, it's called soul conjuration". She seemed to of eased up after hearing him say that, she sounded relieved now.
"Close enough!" Katsumi giggled, "How are you able to talk to me like this anyway?", he asked casually.
"I'll explain later, her snoring has stopped, hurry…", with that her voice faded away like a passing breeze leaving Katsumi in a panic.
"Oh shit" He whispered, swivelling his head to look down the stairs, he heard the clattering of bottles and the crunching of broken glass. He quietly rushed over to a pile of clothes and stuffed them into the plastic bag, he tried desperately to make sure it didn't make too much noise. Bit by bit the clothes were put into the bag, thankfully he didn't have that much stuff. He glanced over to a stack of manga in the corner and asked himself if he needed them. He shook his head and dashed his way over to the door, ensuring he missed the creaky floorboards and the other bag that was laid out on the floor.
He stepped silently down the stairs pausing every now and again to hear where she was, his heart felt like it was about to beat out of his chest. He couldn't hear her, there's no way she would know he was here. His mouth became dry as he tried to figure out where she was to no avail.
SMASH! The sound of a shattering bottle hitting the floor made Katsumi yelp in fear as he stood there, terrified he quickly covered his mouth, he didn't want to have to explain where he was going to her and would rather just leave. The loud bang was followed by a subtle drowsy cuss and a complaint. However, it was what Katsumi needed to figure out where she was. The kitchen.
He sneaked down the last couple of steps and reached for the door, a sigh of relief was just about to escape his lips. "Katsi, baby boy, where you going?" The drunkard slurred. Katsumi froze with his hand clasping the handle. He turned his head, sweat forming on his head.
"I'm just off out for a bit" He barely managed to scrape those words out of his mouth and faked a smile. The woman's eyes lazily scanned him, going from his head, to his clothes and the bag of clothes that was in his hand.
"You're not leaving me are you, sweetie?". Her voice became low, enraged in fact, her head tilted to the side. Katsumi could tell she was about to explode. A glass bottle loosely hung from her hand and he knew exactly what she was going to do with it all too well. "How dare you try to leave me!", the woman roared, wailing in rage. Here we go.
Katsumi stood there paralysed, 'always the same', he thought, his chest beating and his eyes watering once again. He stumbled his words trying to say something but all attempts failed. "You have had enough of being a bread shuttle", Katsumi's mouth opened but closed once again, he didn't need to say anything in response to the goddess this time. He clenched his fist and watched every movement the woman made without making a sound. Observing her, watching her mouth move but not hearing what was coming out of it.
"You're just like you're fucking dad you know that, brat?!", she said through her teeth, how many times did he need to hear that, "You're so selfish and cruel just like him! He hated me too!", Katsumi watched her clench the bottle almost in slow motion and her slowly raise it to throw it, the bottle flew through the air at dangerous speed, but to Katsumi it was floating like a balloon going towards him at a slow pace.
Katsumi released the door handle and in one swift motion caught it, clutching it in one hand, inches away from his face, the woman was incredibly precise with her aim, it was close to inhuman. His brown eyes were serious and the mother could tell, in all her years the boy had never made any attempt to catch it or retaliate and instead took it without question. The woman looked in shock, stumbling, speechless for the first time in a while. Katsumi could tell she was angry what he did ticked her off and a part of him feared for his life yet he tried to suppress it physically. "You can't even take punishments like a good boy can you?! You're useless", the woman had lost it tears rolling down her cheeks. Yet Katsumi was unphased and that pissed her off more, he placed the bottle on the floor beside the door gently and opened the door to exit. "Listen, Honey I'm sorry!", just like that the woman completely flipped from anger to false regret, emotional manipulation so predictable… This time Katsumi learnt for the first time that she won't ever change. If that bottle hit him he'd be seeing the hospital ceiling again.
He closed the door and looked up at the hill, he could still hear his mother begging, "I can forget the old world now it's not like anyone except Ms.Yura would miss me anyway… She'll forget me soon anyway" He turned his back on the house and made his way back, his clothes in his hand, feeling a slight guilt for his actions but a part of him knew that was his mother wanting him to feel like that.