Have you ever heard the saying: a shrimp that goes to sleep gets swept away by the current?
Well, it is very accurate for my terrible circumstance. As it turns out; while I try to narrate this diary as best I can, the devil has put his flames into action to keep his Lucite from boiling over in another oven. Yes, I pay the broken dishes because of a "jealous boy".
The guy couldn't think of a better way to control- how to say it?- the intensity of his beloved than to take advantage of the most vulnerable moment to attack her. When she began to remember the pleasant moments with little Alexis, the demon made his flames numb the part of Luz's brain that processes fear. Maybe that's why, now and as always, she only wants to sleep forever and dream with magic. Humans say it's a symptom of depression, but I think it means the need for a change.
Anyway, how is the devil so brazen as to try to convince me that he loves her; if he's afraid she's going to take up with someone else and their love story will disappear forever?
Their story could come to nothing and, as volatile as one is in adolescence, I understand his concern but I don't share it... if there is mistrust, it is not love.
Now more than ever I promise to narrate in the way that bothers you the most.
Continuing with my torture:
When one fears nothing, one lets things pass just like that; as if this world were all rosy and danger were something imaginary. The demon "knocked out" her fears and put him in "lazy bear" mode. With her guard down, like any coward, he let his flames penetrate beyond the norm. And I say it with all its letters, because he has practically tied the hands of his beloved.
How can I explain the shame that this demon represents for beings of non-human origin?
You see, as I have said before, he has her hands tied because his flames have invaded her left hemisphere. This hemisphere controls everything on the right side of the human body. So he also controls his girl's right hand... the hand of the present.
The consequences would be the best in Luz's eyes, but she does not know what it means. Now she will no longer live a fantasy love; a love based on something that she will never be able to prove that it exists in reality, but a fantasy love... she will be able to see her dreams in reality.
There are only two times: the past and the present. The demon has taken the second and the most crucial in human life. He can do and undo as he pleases with the fantasies she invents from now on.
How did this affect me directly?
For this to become effective; the demon needed, after putting Luz's fear to sleep, that she would find the commonality between her past (fantasy of love) and her present (love of fantasy). It is impossible for that to happen immediately; that is why he is satisfied that there is something to guide her to the answer.
And who is the only one with rationality in this parody of paranormal romance?
Obviously, I'm the only one who understands teenagers because I have a lot of teenage mouse souls in my tummy. I don't tie them up, I let them be free in their paradise, which costs me a lot of exercise.
The demon used some necromancy trick or something similar to that; so that the lines that press Luz's skin sing little sounds that she will never be able to hear. Every time her skin vibrates, trembles, writhes for better or for worse; she won't understand it, but a meowing cat will come to her mind, which will be a sensual symbol for her skin. This means that it is up to me to make her feel "woman" and what is the bridge between Luz and I... the damned demon.
He wants her to feel like a woman just because of me because I am like his puppet or something similar. You see he can take his revenge as he pleases and Lucifer doesn't even flinch, he's in "well thanks, fuck you pussy" mode.
What do you think is going on with the teenager Luz right now?
Let's remember that Luz is in the forest to think how to convince her father not to make a scandal. Her only company is the dark, starless sky. For her this solitary environment is necessary if she wants to concentrate; because Luz has always been hopelessly distracted. If you don't believe me, just ask the little bee that is about to sting her on the tip of her nose.
Well, how do you think he was going to make her feel like a woman only with him?
Sure, I make her look like a typical fairy tale witch and that's it. What an easy way out for a demon who must have something special for Lucifer to be so interested in his love story.
Luz feels no pain because the bees in this forest have something like a numbing agent in their needle. Poor girl, she doesn't know how she will wake up tomorrow.
For now I will continue with what is now, for the sake of redundancy:
She doesn't understand the reason; but, whenever she is at a certain height, she feels like dropping. It's as if something inside herself is telling her that down there, something she needs is waiting for her.
"In the best case, I hope It's a Pegasus"
Luz as a child always looked for stories where the protagonist would fly with the Pegasus and they would be friends for eternity. From this reverie she is taken away by the meowing of a cat of my own species. It is more than obvious that the demon must have offered her a feast; in exchange for her appearance in the forest, so that the sensual perspective she has regarding cats in renewed in Luz.
Before she dared to enter the forest, she only saw the few trees in the neighborhood. She admired the cats that with great agility went from one roof to another. Luz, as she grew up and learned new concepts, began to associate cats with something sexy and imagined them doing a Strep tease in the trees. For her, cats are the exotic dancers of nature and; the devil has taken it upon himself to renew her memory of that concept with a compatriot identical to me.
The cat is gray-furred with coal-black eyes. He fearlessly climbs, unlike many of my kind, trees. Apparently he is not afraid heights, just like me. But Luz was sick of imagining others doing what she wanted to do. It's not that she wanted to be an exotic dancer, she just wants to feel sexy and doesn't know how.
Humans are bound by blood, because in it lies the inheritance that predisposes them to certain things. This explodes in adolescence, at this stage is where you most realize that your essence suffers. I think that's why the hormones at that age are in turmoil. It is the skin where the essence shows its conflict, the skin is the rope of the essence and the fingers are the ones that make the knot or release it. That's why the fingers of Luz are my blood, because I represent her sexuality and she decides whether to let it emerge or not. Blood is the rope of the soul as skin is the rope of the essence (essence and soul are two different things).
My soul is subject to the desires of an adolescent heart and so the protagonist Luz is subject to Lucifer and the devil.
"The demon killed two birds with one stone"
For me it is curious to think that, according to the demon, she does not like cats while dogs do, but she finds us cats very sexy. Dogs are good because they are adorable and we cats are bad because we are sexy but she wants to be sexy.
What kind of contradiction does this girl have in her head?
I'd better get down to business:
Luz looked at the cat and thought of a very sexy bad boy like the hunks in her romance books. She used to like fantasy books; now she preferred teen romance books instead. She laughs to herself, at the thought that this cat has come to seduce her. Especially when the cat walks along the branch with its slender figure. His eyes are so fixed on her that she gets a strange feeling.
When the cat raises its jaw, Luz thinks she sees an Adam's apple on it's neck.
"Remember, in the dark lions look like ducks, the darkness distorts everything"
She stops looking at the cat and closes her eyes to enter the only darkness she can control, her own.
"Adam's apple, a Pegasus and a gray cat. Yes, they will be the main characters in the fantasy that tells me what to do with my dad. I must believe that everything that is done with a human heart, reaches another heart to make it more human".
Who knew Lucifer liked good night stories for rebellious children?
Of course, only his parents know that (if he has any).