It was a miracle we were alive. I still had trouble believing we didn't die back there. We shouldn't have lived through that. How did our crew survive while two other crews deserted, one got burnt to a crisp, and the other was badly crippled? Their gunner had died, and I heard that the driver wouldn't survive the injury he took. I pitied Zaedra. That would be one more tank crew he lost to the damn Earth Kingdom. Could we have done anything? Maybe if Gi Gu wasn't sitting in that damn driver's seat, we could have. All I wanted to do was to teach that asshat how to drive and be useful for once, and all we get is a near death encounter I don't wish to relive. And now Gi Gu acts like it never happened. He's sleeping in our damn tent while I go over our half-assed tank operator manual and Luke trains. What the hell is he doing for us? I knew him in Citadel and I remember him not being the most skilled of the bunch, but not to this level. How could he break this easily? I put down the tank manual and moved to shove Gi Gu awake. There wasn't anything in that manual I hadn't read over 5 times already.
I roughly grabbed him by the shoulder and shook him awake. I'm doing this for you, asshole. When he woke up, after a solid 5 seconds of shaking him, he slowly opened his eyes, and he looked at me with a tired, half-fixed gaze. A soldier should wake up at the first disturbance to his body and be ready to fight. This kid wasn't a soldier, but I would make him once. We were friends once. Back in Citadel. If it meant sacrificing that friendship to make sure he didn't put the life of himself or the lives of our crew in jeopardy, then it was worth it. "Get up!"
I ended up dragging him out of that tent by his shoulder when he refused to awaken on his own and felt a strength I hadn't felt before. I was angry. I tried telling myself that when I did do this, it would be out of love and concern for the soldier I was trying to save, not out of hate, but I kept on seeing his paralyzed face as we sat in that tank, watching the unit in front of us burst into flames, unable to move, just waiting for us to go up in an all too similar blaze. I threw him to the ground, and, finally, he was up.
"Gan. What are you doing?"
"Shut the fuck up!" I grabbed the latrine water we kept outside the tent and splashed what was left in it on the still half sleeping soldier.
"What the hell! That was my piss!"
"Shut up! Grab your sword."
"It's not on me. It's in my tent."
I kicked him in the stomach, halting his recover and sending him back to the ground. "A soldier doesn't go anywhere without his weapon. Grab your weapon!"
"This isn't funny, Gan."
"You're damn right it isn't. Grab your weapon."
I gave Gi Gu a minute to wipe the piss from his eyes and get up. When he didn't, I pulled him up by the shoulder and threw him in the direction of the tent. I unsheathed my own sword, waiting for him to come out with his weapon. I stood directly in front of the tent flaps, sword in hand, making it obvious I was ready to fight. Gi Gu failed to recognize an apparent threat, so I swung.
Gi Gu failed to block my attack or avoid my attack so the swing took him in the leg. It was a small scratch, but it sent him to the ground. These swords, good quality. Perks of our recent promotion. An actual infantry weapon.
Gi Gu was on the ground, no longer holding his sword, grabbing his leg, blocking the stream of blood flowing from his leg.
"A standard issue Fire Nation protective leg plate protects your shin and leg from bladed weapons to an extent. Why are you not equipped for combat?!"
"You just told me to grab my damn sword!" He was in pain. I could hear it in his voice. It hurt to hear, but it had to be done. He had to learn.
"Your enemy won't tell you when to prepare for combat! You must always anticipate conflict when surrounded by enemies!"
"You not my enemy, Gan. We're friends!" He was choking on his words. I could see tears glistening in his eyes as he still lay on the ground. We are friends. I wanted to say. That's why I'm doing this.
"Now you're injured. You're covered in piss and your wound will become infected if you do not treat yourself. How do you treat an injury!?"
"I-I don't know!"
"You disinfect. How do you disinfect a wound?!"
"Wit-Wi-Wi"
"Alcohol! Where do we store alcohol for disinfection!"
"In our-our packs!"
"Grab it, then!"
"I-I-I can't stand. It hurts. I don't have my pack on me."
"Then you're dead!"
"Why are you doing this, Gan? We're friends!"
"I'm doing this because you put the lives of your crew, of your 'friends' at risk. You froze when we counted on you and we almost died because of you!"
I kneeled down and grabbed the fresh private first-class patch sewed to his uniform and cut off the strip of cloth with my sword, throwing the portion of his shirt and his rank insignia into a nearby perimeter fire, burning it, leaving his left shoulder bare but for the skin on his bones. "If soldiers can be rewarded for cowardice and endangerment of his comrades, then you would do just fine, but that's not how this works. You got lucky last time and it's a miracle we aren't all dead by your hands!"
I snatched the pin he had pinned to his shirt and ripped it off, tearing his uniform even more. I threw it to the ground and crushed it with the heel of my boots. "If you hadn't frozen but knew how to drive and we weren't in that damn tank to stop you, you would have run! You would have run because you're weak and you're a coward. Those who did desert were trialed just yesterday and were hanged. I was there. Luke was there. You weren't there. You should have been there. You should have seen what the world does to cowards and weaklings like you! It kills them! DO you want to die so badly!?"
"N-n-no!" He was crying. Tears were rolling down his face and soaking into his clothing.
"So you're a traitor? Trying to get us killed, willing to give your own life to see your comrades killed alongside you?!"
"I-I"
"Shut up! What are you then!"
"I'm. I'm a soldier."
"No. You're not a soldier. You're a coward. A loose end. Soldier's don't cower. Soldier's don't cry. Soldier's fight."
"I'm. I'm so-sorry."
"Don't be sorry! Learn! The world showed pity and for that, you aren't a burnt carcass trapped in the burnt hull of a tank."
"I-I didn't mean to- "
I slapped him cross the face, sending him down to the ground. "Stop fucking crying!" He wasn't covering his leg and the grass below him was turning red from his blood. Good. Maybe blood would teach him.
"Now. What the fuck are you!?"
"I'm. I'm a coward." He stopped his crying. He was working to stand up. Good. Keep going.
"Yes. You're a coward, but you're going to learn how to be a soldier. You failed to learn in Citadel, so you'll learn now." I offered him my hand and when he accepted, I threw him back to the ground.
"But get this straight." I continued. "If you put the lives of me or Luke at risk again and I see that there is a choice between the life of you or a real soldier, I will discard you without a second though, at least until you prove you are a real soldier! Understand?!"
He was done crying by now. He was sitting up on his own and had wiped the tears from his face. The first lesson was always the hardest, but he'd learn. "I understand."
"Good." I lost a friend that day but gained a soldier. Or at leas the makings of one. And with that in mind, it was well worth it.
The next day, he had his hounds patched and our tank crew was called to gather in the tent of Major General Zand where he placed a map of Ba Sign Se with a solid red line going around the North of Ba Sing Se to a point labeled 'The Dragon's Camp.' I knew what was happening and I knew that now more than ever, we wouldn't need friends. No. We needed soldiers. Friends don't survive war. Only soldiers do.
Major General Zand sat us down and pointed to the map. Before he even spoke, I knew that this would be Gi Gu's real test. And I prayed, for his sake and ours, that he would pass it.
Zand spoke and set us out on our next task. "I have a mission for you."