Chereads / Dak & Daffy / Chapter 4 - 04 All In a Day's Work

Chapter 4 - 04 All In a Day's Work

"Dammit Daffy! I told ye an' told ye not to drink the ruddy vial!" Dak shouted as he swung from branch to branch as fast as his limbs would carry him. Hot on his heels, The ograppa lumbered along below him, occasionally smacking the thinner trees in hopes of knocking Dak out. Thankfully, Dak was always just a little too fast for him.

"Can't you show a little sympathy?" Daffy groaned. "It feels like my stomach is trying to eat it's way out of my body. That stuff was awful by the way."

"Sympathy?!" Dak let out a short burst of maniacal laughter. "Ye drank my only hope of takin' out our ugly friend, an' now I be on the menu! I told ye, repeatedly, that it was poison! Cockatrice venom in fact, but nah, why would daft little Daffy listen ta shite good ol' Dak had ta say?! Ye'll be gettin' nary a shred of sympathy from me!"

"You're so cruel to me Dak!" Daffy said with a burp. Fortunately, she was facing away from him, because a plume of toxic green miasma puffed out of her mouth. This gave him an idea.

"Ye earned your lot Daffy," he replied. "Would that ye died like normal folk and put me outta me misery. Most people would be dead. Ya be stupid enough ta drink Cockatrice venom out o' a vile, ye deserve ta be dead! But not you! Oh no! Not Daffy!" He ranted, as he snatched her up with his tail. He was careful not to squeeze her and to keep her as far from him as possible.

"Dak? Just what are you doing with me?!" Daffy squealed in alarm as he started aiming to the beast below them.

"Knowing my luck, this won't kill ya, but yon beastie won't be so lucky if 'tall goes to plan," Dak responded with a grim smile.

It wasn't exactly easy to aim while running for his life, so it took longer for Dak to get a good shot that he would've liked. Once he had everything lined up just right, he launched Daffy with a flick of his tail. To his delight, she belly-flopped right onto the creature's face and reflexively latched onto it as she made contact.

Bewildered, the ograppa came to a halt and shook it's head in an effort to free itself from the unseen object stuck to it's face. while it was distracted, Dak found the sturdiest tree available and clambered up to the top where he could watch from a safe vantage.

"Dak, this isn't funny!" Daffy wailed as she clung desperately to the ograppa.

"That's a matter of perspective," Dak replied. "Maybe next time ye will tink twice about drinkin' me vials ya no good thievin' vermin!"

Daffy's response was drowned out by the the frustrated hooting and grunting of the ograppa. Since shaking hadn't worked, the beast brought a hand to it's face to remove the nuisance. Dak watched in eager anticipation as the monstrous hands closed around the sprite and it ripped her none-to-gently from his face.

"Come on... eat her!" Dak clenched and unclenched a fist as he watched the Ograppa stare at the contents of it's hand in confusion. "What're ye waitin' for?"

He realized the flaw in his plan as the ograppa began squeezing and loosening it's grip, and using it's free hand to poke at Daffy experimentally. The ograppa could feel the sprite in it's hand, but it couldn't actually see her. As a matter of fact, Dak was the only person who could see or hear Daffy.

"Oh stop that you stupid monster!" Daffy groaned in total misery. Her bright yellow complexion was beginning to look quite green as the ograppa began shaking her. "This is not how you treat a lady!"

Heedless of her complaints, the ograppa brought the sprite close to it's face to try sniffing her. Apparently it had shook her up pretty good, because as the ograppa's thumb pressed just wrong on Daffy's stomache, the sprite released a tremendous fart that rung out through the forest louder and more clearly than a cathedral bell. A toxic green cloud erupted from the sprite and engulfed the beast and everything around it a good 10 feet. A profound silence followed. Dak stared on dumbly as the gas cloud cleared, unable to process what it was he'd just witnessed.

"Daffy?" he called, nervously.

"Wow," Daffy said with one last burp. "I feel a lot better."

Cautiously, Dak climbed down the tree to the lower branches to get a better look. Daffy, meanwhile, stood up in the ograppa's palm and stretched.

"Is it dead?" Dak questioned.

The creature was limp and motionless on the ground. Dak wasn't willing to risk moving any closer because one of two things was possible. The ograppa might just be unconscious or feigning unconsciousness in which case it could feasibly start coming after Dak again. Alternatively, it was very possible and highly likely that Daffy's fart had succeeded in killing the beast, and Dak was not going to risk meeting a similar fate.

"Looks like it," Daffy replied as she offered it a good kick. "Big brute deserves it for treating a lady so roughly!"

"Lady? You?!" Dak busted up in a fit of unbridled laughter. "Ye killed a bull ograppa with a fart! A fart Daffy! Ye can'ne call yourself a lady!"