Dear Mom and Dad,
I met a boy. I've never been interested in the male population. In all my years of living dating someone has never crossed my mind. Until now. He cares about me and respects my boundaries. He doesn't try to push me to do things I don't want to do and tries to make me happy. We only just met recently so I definitely want to take things slow. But mom and dad he makes me happy.
I've always kept a low profile at school because I never wanted to be put in the spotlight. You always told me my eyes were unique and I should love them because they make me different from everyone else. But honestly I don't see it, they make me feel like a freak show. A spectacle for the whole world. He tells me they're beautiful though and when he says it I start to believe it.
I've struggled with anxiety ever since you left and when I got into middle school it got way worse. I got called names and was labeled the freak of the school. I was an outcast and I liked it that way. I never and still don't understand why people crave friend and validation from others. You need to love yourself or you'll never know your self worth. But honestly I don't practice what I preach. I've never thought I was enough for anyone.
Im ever skinny enough or I don't have blonde hair and blue eyes so im not his type. I don't dress like the girls in my school and show off my body like they do. I don't like pink and I prefer dark colors. I'm the opposite of everything he's used to so how I enough? You guys used to guide me and always tell me what I needed to hear and keep me on the right track. But your gone now and I don't know what decisions to make.
I'll write all this then burn it like I always do hoping somehow -someway this will get to you wherever you are.
Until we met again.
Always lovingly,
Your daughter that misses you dearly