6:55 am
When I woke up, I immediately got up to take a bath while the child was not yet awake.
Until now I'm still wondering why James didn't came! From morning to night? I was waited there in the park there and I wasn't even brought in by a shadow! Aish! He will pay for this!!
After I took a bath, I got dressed and went out of the room to go to Ate in the kitchen so I could help her prepare breakfast.
"Morning" he greeted while cooking hotdogs.
Yes hotdogS. With S.
"Morning" I said and helped serve the plates on the sofa.
We thought of eating a salo salo because there are five of us now, and because the table on the sofa can't be used.
I looked at my room because it looked like someone was shouting or someone was calling so I said goodbye to Ate before entering my room.
"Baby?" I called when I came in but I immediately went to bed because he seemed to be having bad dreams.
"Baby wake up" I said as he shook his softly on the shoulder. His eyebrows meet and he can't seem to figure out his position.
"Mommy" he whispered softly but I heard that because I was still shaking him.
"Baby" I'm still do but he still doesn't wake up.
"D-daddy no! No! NO !!" he was already shouting so I was confused and immediately patted him on the cheek
What will I do?
"B-baby wake up" I'm crying because he seems to be having a hard time now.
"Ate! Ate Sophia!" I shouted so the door immediately slammed and three people entered. They are Papa, brother Jerome and sister Sophia who are worried about going my way.
"Daddy stop! M-mommy! No stop it! NOOO !!" He shouted loudly and immediately looked up so I immediately hugged him tightly.
"Baby!" I said crying as I hugged him.
"A-ate" he also cried when he called me and hugged me tightly. "W-what was my dream Ate? What is it?"
"Shh stop, Ate is here" I told him while he hugged me very tightly.
"Let's go out first" Papa said goodbye and took Kuya Jerome with him but Ate just left and lay down on the bed.
"Are you okay baby?" Ate asked the boy and he stroked his hair.
"I-I don't know, I'm scared" he said still crying so I can't stop crying.
At his young age I don't know why this is happening? Why does he seem to be in pain?
"Everything will be ok baby too huh? Your Ate and I are just here" Ate Sophia calmed the child so I looked at her.
Our eyes seem to be talking, our eyes are talking with a big question why? What? How?
"Home" I said and I picked him up and let him go.
He just hugged me and patted my shoulder while he cried.
"It's good for you to eat first" Ate said smiling and then she left.
"Come on, do you want to eat? There's breakfast on the sofa" I said and he turned to me and nodded. I wiped the tears from her cheeks and smiled at her.
I cleaned him first before we went to the sofa to eat. I saw them papa watching tv so I sat the child on the sofa and got a plate for him.
I just helping him because he doesn't seem to be in the mood to eat alone right now because he's just stunned and seems to be thinking.
he just a child is still young the depth of thinking?
"You ok baby?" I asked so he nodded and smiled at me.
"Thank you Ate" he said.
"Ate Nizzie" I said smiling and pinched his cheek.
It's Sunday and I have no intention of leaving but it looks like this child needs to breathe and be happy today. I think we would go to the house of Ken and Athena who had just been released from the hospital last time.
"Where are we going?" he asked when I put on Kuya Jerome's diminished clothes and diaper with him.
"At the Mall, can you behave?" I said smiling so the smile widened and he nodded at me.
I said goodbye to my family so we took a trycicle to go to Athena near here.
When we look at Athena's house, it is quite large compared to our house. I immediately picked up Baby and knocked on their door.
Athena's face opened up to me, just taking a bath and frowning. That also disappeared when he saw who I was with.
"Nizzie! What are you doing here? And you actually brought a very cute baby" she said smiling and pinched my loaded baby's cheek.
"Would you like to go with us to the Mall? We're also going to Ken" I said to her.
"Exactly. I just finished taking a bath, I'll just get dressed ah? Just a moment" she said hurriedly and quickly entered their house.
It was really only a moment because after I turned around, the door opened again and Athena, smiling, opened it immediately.
"Your health" I reminded her because she might breathe more.
We just walked to Ken's house because we were just close. I am close to Athena, Athena is close to Ken.
*Ding dong*
When I rang the doorbell, Ateng's maid suddenly came out.
"Oh mam!" she called and asked us to open the door. I lowered the child first and then confronted her.
"Is Ken there?" I asked her so she nodded and let us in.
Athena was the one who went to ken's room because he didn't seem to want to went this child because se wandered around here below, I watched him because he might break somthing or move.
I made the child sit on the sofa first so that the two might go down.
"Nizzie" Ken obviously just woke up because of him calling my name.
"Ah Ken can you come first? We'll just take this boy for a walk" I begged him, he looked at the boy I was holding.
"Hi kuya!" Baby greeted Ken warmly.
"Who is that?" he asked and then knelt down to match the child.
"Get dressed first, I'll tell you later" I said to him, he nodded and went up to take a bath.
"Does he own this house?" the child asked me so I looked at Athena who was now smiling at the child.
"Yes" I answered and hugged him.
"It's a nice house" he said looking around, he suddenly turned to me and whispered "This house is also in my dream but it's not that"
"Don't think that again, ok?" I said to him, he nodded so I just hugged him.
What's wrong with this boy? Why is he like this? How did it all come to this ?.
"Let's go?" Ken said so we left their house.
"Let's just have a car so we don't have to wait any longer" he said and went to the garage and got out of his car.
"Car car car ~" the child was too naughty when I loaded so I got out and we got into the car.
Baby and I were just behind and Athena was in the passenger seat.
When we arrived at the Mall, I immediately went down because this child wanted to enter.
I don't know why I'm taking care of a child now -, -
"Let's take him to the kidzone first" Ken pretended so we took the elevator and went to what he was saying.
I paid for him because I had to pay before the child entered, after I paid I let him play with the children here inside the Kidzone.
"Tell me your story" Athena said and sat down on the chairs here outside.
Ken and I sat down and I told them why the child came to me.
I didn't tell them why I was there and I was waiting for someone because they would definitely be angry about it.
"Isn't that boy rich?" Athena asked me but I just shrugged because I didn't know the story of that child's personality.
"He's better off with you first, I'm sure there's something wrong with his past" Ken said worriedly to me.
That's also what I had in mind because apart from what happened this morning, I was also surprised by what he said that their house is the same size as Ken but he didn't know if it was really theirs because he was still young and only 5 years old.
"Ate!" Baby shouted inside the window and waved at us so the three of us waved back at him and smiled.
"He's handsome, what's his name?" Athena asked but I just shook my head
"I don't know either. He doesn't have a name and he wants me to be named after him" I told them.
"What do you mean?" Ken asked confused.
"Just like when I told you, he already lives in that park and his friends are like him on the street. When I asked him what his name was, he just shook his head and said he didn't know" I told them again.
"It's better to think ahead so that we don't call her Baby hahaha" Athena said laughing and stood up. The bell rang inside so we got up and waited for the child to come out.
Dad, on the other hand, increased my money so that in case he didn't have enough to buy his child's things. I bought him clothes and shorts for home or departure.
We first went to a restaurant to eat because it was going to be night and we were tired of buying things to use at home.
"What do you want baby?" I asked and he sat down next to me.
"Anything Ate hihi" he said while playing with his car.
Ken bought that so that the child could play somehow. He didn't just buy that, he also had a truck, van, and other male toys.
Better barbie kidding haha!
We already ordered when we could eat because we were all hungry haha.
When the order arrived, the number of people here increased so we hurried a bit and rested before leaving.
"Yeah, I enjoy it"
"Ok"
"But I enjoyed it more yesterday hihi"
"Ah ok"
Wait! T-that voice, I-I seem to know who. But that is impossible.
"You don't seem to be on your own, James."
"A-ah sorry"
"Its ok, lets eat?"
"Sure"
There's a lots of James ok? Not just him!
"Niz? Are you ok?" I ignored Ken who asked me because I slowly looked behind us where I heard the voice there.
When I faced behind us, I saw the woman behind me but I tilted my head so I could see the person she was talking to.
Damn.
"James" I whispered so they both looked at me.
"N-nizzie" James stammered to me so I looked at the woman who was now smiling at me.
She is beautiful, smooth skin, clearskin. And you can just tell her-- She has all the beauty.
But her arrangement and appearance are familiar. Does it seem like I've already seen her?
"Do you guys known each other?" the woman asked with a smile so I just shook my head at her and faced Ken and I sat down.
I also noticed that he was just looking, he couldn't look at my companions and he seemed to be hiding something, but you wouldn't notice that when you didn't approach him and when you didn't look at him carefully.
"Nizzie" Ken called me but I just smiled at him and looked at the child who was playing
"But I enjoyed it more yesterday"
"But I enjoyed it more yesterday"
M-maybe he wasn't there yesterday because he was with someone else? Is that why he didn't show up yesterday because someone was having fun with him? Is that why he didn't come to me yesterday because he was with his REAL gf?
What can I do? Eh we don't have each other?
But why is my chest tightening now as I see him with someone else? Why?
I ignored that because maybe my chest just tightened because I couldn't get back with him or because he didn't show up.
"Let's go?" I took care of them and I lowered the child on the chair and carried the paperbags, Athena helped me so I could hold the child properly.
I looked at James' behavior again when I saw that they were talking happily so I took my mind off my thoughts and left that place.
After Baby and I got in Ken's car, he took us home so I said goodbye to them and thanked you.
"Pa" I said when I saw Papa outside with Ate Sophia talking.
"Oh? How's your day baby?" Ate asked and carried Baby into the house.
I waved to Papa and smiled just right because I feel different now from earlier when we left the Mall.
"Have you eaten yet? If I haven't cooked yet so we can eat" papa asked and we went inside at the same time.
I saw Baby and sister Sophia laughing on the sofa and it looked like they already liked each other.
I just looked at Papa and shook my head "We're still full, maybe we'll rest first"
"Oh go ahead" Papa replied and went to the sofa where they were Ate so I also went to tell him.
"Baby, just come into the room when you want to rest ok? I'll just rest" I said to her with a half smile.
"Ok, Ate" he said then I said goodbye to them and entered my room.
When I entered the room, I first laid the paperbags on the side and then stretched out on the bed.
I just sighed and faced the ceiling, why can't he be removed from my mind? Why do I seem to feel strange, at first I was angry because he didn't bring me yesterday because he had someone with him. But I was wondering something else. When I saw him with the woman earlier, why? Why do I seem jealous?
Aishh!
I just messed up my hair and sat up. Exactly when I sat down, the door opened.
"Oh baby, do you want to sleep?" I asked when he sat on the bed but he just shook his head.
"Ate? What's your problem?" I was surprised when he asked me that.
Wow?
"What's the problem baby? Nothing, after all, you're still young for such things" I said laughing and messed up her hair.
"It's as if something went wrong with you before. Since you saw the man at the restaurant, that's how it is. Who is he?" he asked curiously so I just shook his head and squeezed his cheek.
"It's just Ate's friend" I said to him smiling, he nodded and approached me.
"If you're sad, I'm here for you ok? I love you Ate" I smiled at the attitude of this young man or should I say old? Hahaha
"Thank you baby, iloveyoumore" I said and kissed him on the cheek and messed up his hair again.
"Sleep already?" I asked him so he nodded and laid the toy he was carrying on the floor. "Wash yourself first" I said and stood up.
I took off what he was wearing and put it aside. I just poured lukewarm water on him because it was late at night and he was young.
When I returned to the room, I scratched what we had bought earlier to get her pajamas. When I wore it with him, I arranged for him before going to bed.
"You dont want milk baby?" I asked him as he came forward and looked at me.
"Not anymore Ate, I'm used to rice" he said and yawned so I knew he was tired and drowsy.
"Ok, sleep. Goodnight baby" I said and kissed him on the forehead.
"Goodnight" when he went to sleep, I also go to sleep because I was also tired and there was still class tomorrow.
***/***
6:05 am
As usual I woke up early and took a shower because my class starts at 7:30 this Monday.
I don't even know who I will leave this child to because I will be at school all day. It's just my family because they seem to get along well.
After I did what I had to do I first went into the room to kiss Baby on the forehead before leaving the house.
When I arrived at the school, there were no such people and the guards were still a bit sleepy.
The breeze is nice in the morning, especially when you get up in the sun, in case I haven't stayed long because I might get sick again in class.
"Goodmoring Nizzie!/Morning Ate!/Hey Niz!" I greeted the three of them when I met them up the building so I met them and hugged them.
"Morning" I said and we went up together.
We were on the second floor when they stopped me.
"Niz" Steven called me so I looked at him.
"What?" I asked but he did not answer me.
"Are you ready?" Black asked, I was aroused by him so my forehead furrowed even more.
"Ready where?"
"Just watch" Green said and we continued climbing.
Weirdo.
When we went up to our floor, I felt like I was getting heavier and heavier. But we kept going to the bedroom.
I thought Black would open the door because he was ahead of us but he just knocked three times as if it had a sign because of the sound. Then he suddenly stepped aside and seemed to want me to open it.
It's so weird.
"I'll just open the door I need--" I stopped speaking when I opened the door of the room "M-michael"
Michael's face opened up to me so my head got hot immediately but it disappeared when I noticed that he was full of bruises and wounds. I was even more surprised when it suddenly knelt in front of me and bowed even more as if I were Allah.
N-no.
"M-michael" my voice cracked as I called to him because tears were falling down my cheeks one after another.
"N-nizzie im sorry, I'm very very sorry Nizzie. Please forgive me I didn't mean to do that to you but please forgive me." crying he said, it doesn't matter that he speaks on the floor because it's as if he's worshiping me in his position now.
"Michae--"
"Yell at me if you want, punch me, kick me or slap me if you want! Please forgive me Nizzie! P-please" he cried, interrupting what I was going to say so I just nodded and looked up to stop the tears. .
"N-nizzie, im sorry" cracked voice he begged me.
"S-stop now" I was still looking up because my chest was tightening again.
"I'm sorry" he moaned now so I looked at him.
"S-stand there" I just said while looking at him.
"Please Nizzie forgive me, I'm sorry" he begged again so I knelt down with him and lifted him from his crutch.
"S-stand up" I just said and I stood up so he stood up and faced me.
"N-nizzie, do what you want just to forgive me" I could see in his eyes that he was really sorry so I just closed my eyes tightly.
"I-I want to be mad at you--"
"Then punch me or whatever just to remove your--"
"--But I can't!" I shouted at him when I opened my eyes so he stopped.
Steven calls "Nizzie" but I still staring at Michael.
"I c-can't" I said weakly while crying in front of him.
When I saw him crying in front of me, I immediately turned around and did not continue to enter the room. What else can I do don? We had an awkward moment after this so I chose to be alone where I could think.
Where I always go is where I go, behind this building. It's comfortable here and the wind is strong.
I just got on my knees and sat at my feet and just bowed down.
Why? Why do I want this to happen? Is fate angry with me because he only gives pain? I'm always in pain, whether with friends or family. It's ok, I'm ok with everything but why is that? Why are there still bad people like them? I can forgive Michael because he won't continue but I'm thankful for that. But Dave? I have no intention of forgiving that animal.
I just cried while in that position because my chest was tightening again but I couldn't stop myself from crying.
Why? w-why!
I'm already punching my chest because of the pain I'm feeling, I'm just punching a punch and asking why? Why is this happening to me ?!
I just stopped what I was doing when someone suddenly hugged me, I looked at who it was but I couldn't see him because of the tears in my eyes so instead of staring at him I became even weaker and cried and cried.
"Shh stop crying" he whispered so I stopped crying.
James.
"W-what are you doing here?" I said and I stayed away when he hugged me and I wiped the tears on my cheeks.
"To see you, and to help you" he said calmly and turned to face me. "Just cry as long as you want, I'm just here"
"I'm just here"
"I'm just here"
"I'm just here"
Are you just here? Really ?!
I was just blown away by what he said and looked at him in astonishment.
"Are you just here?" I asked so he frowned and nodded "Really? You're funny" I said and averted my eyes because I was a little annoyed with him.
"D-do we have a problem?" he asked confused so I laughed even more at what he said. I looked at him with my mouth open while smiling.
"Yes there is. It's you, you're my problem" I said directly to him.
After all, he is also here with me to vent my anger.
"What do y-you mean?" wow? Really ?.
"I'm just asking, right? Do you remember what we talked about--"
"I'm sorry about that, I just need to--"
"--- I just looked like a fool on Saturday waiting for you" I insisted, continuing what I said he cut.
"I'm sorry" he said with a bow.
"Do you know I don't eat breakfast anymore, I'm making it easy for you to text Black, I waited there until nightfall" I said to him and then I stood up "Until nightfall I was hoping that you might come, b-but I just hoped that haha. Who am I to be angry with you, right? Who am I to interfere in your bonding with 'your girlfriend' "I really emphasized the word girlfriend so that she would know how I feel.
"Well I just want you to know that I don't want to be indebted to people so I did that. Let it happen again" I said and turned around to leave but I stopped when I felt him stand up and speak.
"D-don't tell me, are you jealous?" I immediately looked at him badly but I saw him just smiling.
What? Me? Are you jealous? btch.
"Why should I be jealous? What do you want me to be jealous of? Besides, no matter what you do when you're jealous, I don't care!" I shouted annoyed but it just got closer and closer while smiling so I was the idiot backwards backwards.
"Janine is not my girlfriend" I immediately averted my eyes when she said that.
I don't care if it's his girlfriend or not! Tsk.
"Really? Eh why are you together from Saturday to yesterday? After all, you're still having fun while I look like a fool waiting for you?" heck what am I saying ?! "I m-mean what, j-just! Whoever she is, have fun there!" I stuttered while still backing away because he was still very close so I couldn't look at him directly.
"Janine is my cousin" c-cousin?
Omg embarrassing!
"Your cousin?" I asked again so he stood up smiling. I looked away again and scratched my forehead.
What aft Nizzie!
"So now that you know who she is, aren't you jealous?" he said meaningfully, I immediately looked at him and shook my head.
"Why should I be jealous anyway? Tsk" I said, he came again so I backed away again.
When will we stop? Huhuhu.
Oh ow! Dead. I-I can't back down because I'm full! I looked at the man in front of me who was now smiling.
I just closed my eyes when he put his hand on the tree and locked me up and then he brought his face closer ..
Grr! Will he kiss you? Taenaaa!
"Pfft, do you think I will kiss you?" I was immediately wide -eyed and stunned because of what he said, I assume too much.
"If you want I'll do it" he said then I immediately pushed him and looked at him badly.
"P-p-pervert!" I stuttered and said that I had already left.
When I turned around I couldn't help but smile, I don't know why but I suddenly smiled.
"I saw you smiling baby!" he shouted so I covered my face and ran back to the room.
I'm angry with him but why is that? Aishh!
Touching the doorknob of the room I was immediately stopped. I'm here behind the door because I don't want to go in front and I might just be misled.
Will I enter or not?
"It's up to you" I whispered and opened the room door.
I was surprised when I opened the door as if I was back when I first entered this school. In this room.
"What is this?"
*****/****