Should I have felt disrespected? Honored, or enraged? from knowing all of this?
From knowing what my Elder and his grandson thought of me.
looking at the outline of my reflection in the water that my teacher was using to wash the herbs and roots.
Looking more human than deer. Not tall nor lean enough like the deer. No markings on my skin or horns to adorn my head.
Horns, Markings, prey, hunts.
Before my mind begins to wonder about it. My teacher comes back with a bowl of clean water, leaves, herbs, and cloth. She looks at me and smiles. She starts explaining what she is going to do with the wave of her fingers and the motion of her hands. She warns me that this will hurt.
Wincing, as she begins to apply the water first and then the herbs and leaves. As she wraps the cloth around my foot. Elder Tototl stands from where he was resting. turning my head upward to see why Elder Tototl stood up.
I should have kept my head down because Elder Tototl started greeting his grandson, Meztli. I turned to look away, but that didn't stop Meztli's penetrating gaze to weigh me down. My teacher notices my odd behavior. When she finished healing me, she flicked my foot causing slight pain.
" Ahhh." I yelped.
" She begins scolding me for not wearing my shoes." when she finishes she stands to greet Meztli. As I try to stand, my Teacher, helps me up. I try to balance myself. As I hold on to her.
Elder Tototl grants permission for Meztli to take me home. I try to decline respectfully, saying that " It's all right." and " That I'm okay." My Teacher tugs at my ear. She looks at me angrily. She explains to me that I need help.
finally, giving in and accept the offer. Meztli moves to my side, where my unharmed leg is located at. He is so huge beside me. I must look like a child to him.
He guides my arm behind him so that my palm is against his back. His long and huge arm moves to envelop me. I stiffen a bit. The villagers will believe we are to be wedded if they see us this close. Meztli waits for me to take the first step. When I do we try to match each other's pace and movements. We succeed to fall into a pace that both of us could handle. As we move farther away From my Teacher and the Elders. I ask Meztli a question.
" At the river, were you following me?"
He looks at me as if I offended him.
" Amo (No). I was searching for an animal then you came along. I saw that you were walking with your eyes close. I thought you would fall on the root, but you managed to walk over it somehow."
" Did you try to warn me or stop me, When you thought I would fall? " I ask.
He didn't answer me quickly, he waited and sighed. He said a simple " Yes". He must have moved to say something, but before he could say anything he saw that I knew my way around the path. He must have stepped on something which made me stop which also made him stop and that resulted in it being very quiet at that moment.
" You're strange! Who walks with their eyes closed? Widens their eyes here and there? Jumps from cliffs and swims with snakes? " He says this as if there is a nasty taste in his mouth as if I have insulted him.
I try to say something in my defense, but before I can say anything he continues.
" Your name, it's also very odd and simple for a woman. "
I don't respond.
I know my name is odd and simple, It's not beautiful like the other names in our village. We walk in silence now. I try to look forward and not think about the past.
Being named Mazatl, made other children tease me when I was younger. I would hit, bite, and do almost anything that would make them bleed. I was like a wild animal.
I tried forgetting this for it was in the past, but the feeling never vanishes.
How dare he insult me!
What ah- I added a bit too much pressure on the toes of my wounded foot from becoming angered. I winced, stopping in my tracks. My hand immediately went up and held on to Meztli's neck, bending him down and pulling him closer to me. I didn't realize what I had done and how close he was, for the pain was unbearable. Slowly both of his arms wrapped around my waist inching me even closer to him.
I'm was too focused on the pain when I suddenly felt his lips caress the side of my face. He was so close to my ear that I could feel his breath when he leaned back.
I look at him with sourness, as if I had eaten an unripe fruit.
There was no one around, we were surrounded by wood. My home was located far away from the village. It took a while for me to travel home and back when I was still studying. It still a long walk when I'm needed at the village.
Meztli's brown skin was dusted now with warm reds, around his face and neck. Being this close to him, I could see that he was beautiful. His black hair ear-lengthed. His eyes were as black as the obsidian.
I looked away from him, not wanting to see him for my face would brighten like red fruit if I did.
I tried walking, but he held in my place. I still did not look at him.
" Mazatl." He called my name in a low voice for only me to hear.
He whispered my name, though there was no one around.
looking up. He didn't say anything and neither did I. I widened my eyes again for I did not understand. Why did he care for a stranger with a strange name?
The palm of his hand intertwined with my hair, not expecting to go to the village today I left it down. Usually, it would be braided and up, with cloth woven into it. His actions were warm and I yearned for it, but this was not right. He had to present himself with his family to my family. We are not supposed to be this close. Mextli's hand is now at the back of my head. His eyes drop to my lips.
Before anything could happen.
I pushed him with a bit of strength, enough to knock him out of balance. This also caused me to completely fall. A groan of pain was escaped my mouth. Meztli rushed to my side.
A worried expression on his face.
Meztli is one of the serious types. Like almost all the men in our village and the expression, he was making right now surprised me. I never thought a man like him could make such a face.
" Why are you laughing? Are you not hurt.? " He asked in a confused tone
Calm down Mazatl. I scold myself.
I hear him sigh. I apologized and tell him of the face he just made when I fell. He looks at me as if I had just told him the most confusing riddle. This causes me to laugh again, which to my surprise Meztli joins me. We both laugh until tears come out of our eyes.
When we calmed down he asked me a question.
" Does anyone know you can fly and speak to serpents?"
" I can't fly or speak to serpents!" I responded and gave him a puzzled stare. " I only jumped from a cliff into the water. The serpent was of the land it only wanted safe passage back."
" I thought you flew when you jumped and I thought you would have died, but you didn't, The serpent hugged you and I thought you would have died, but you didn't. " He paused and spoke again. " Does Lord Quetzalcoatl guide you? "
I laughed at his remark.
" Your misunderstanding Meztli, I could have died, but I just chose not to."
I looked at him and again his face was adorned with even more confusion.
" Help me up, My Nantli must be worried or worse furious."
"You're strange, you know. " he tells me as he pulls me up.
" You seem to like strange." I bite back, with authority in my voice. This causes him to flinch. No resp[ose came from him.
Pride filled my chest for silencing him.
At that moment I felt taller than all the men and women of our village.