Before Marcus left, I took care of him. Even our own mother would refer to me as his second mother. I loved Marcus and I thought he loved me two. But his refusal to come back home tells me otherwise. Does he really not want to come home? He was favourited by my parents and I didn't mind it. Although it did hurt sometimes when he was clearly treated differently from me only because of his gender. I was a girl and he was a boy. That means I'm less important than him.
My mother expected me to stay in line and never do anything reckless. She wanted this perfect daughter who grew up into the perfect house wife. What I wanted never really mattered. I had plans of travelling or exploring the world during my gap year later on in life, but my mother said girls like me don't do such. But if I was a boy, then things would be different.
But that still doesn't explain why I could hear the pipes; I wouldn't consider myself lost. I mean, my parents loved me, or at least my mother. Although we didn't share the same values, we had a good relationship. Maybe I am lost; maybe they didn't love me. I could tell they had it in them with the way they treated Marcus. Or maybe I'm lost because I never fitted in at school. I would usually just hover around like a wasp trying to find a flower to collect nectar from.
Who knows? But a part of me still believes I couldn't be lost; after all I was certainly not a boy. Thus, maybe my ability to hear the pipes was a mistake. Or maybe it's because I was a 'magic wielder', whatever that could mean. I certainly didn't feel magical, or even special.
All I felt was responsibility for Marcus; as if he was my own child. I know it sounds melodramatic, but my instincts to protect him are always heightened. Especially after his disappearance.
So when I saw him bullying a Frankie during training; all hell broke loose. I raised him better!
I was about to storm up to him when someone grabbed my arm. Thomas. The stern look in his eyes said it all: it's not worth it. he knew me well. When Thomas figured out my identity, he was dumbfounded.
FLASHBACK
Frankie, Thomas and I were walking back to camp. The awkward silence was oddly deafening. There were several boys around the fire eating out of carved bowls. Beginning to join in, Frankie asked, "Aren't you guys coming?"
"No. Auro- A.J and I are not hungry. Talk to you later." There was a hint of anger in his voice and we made our way towards our treehouse. His silence was intimidating. I felt as if I was about to be scolded like a child.
We made our way inside and he slammed the door, in turn making me jump a little. He looks at me straight in the eyes, "DO YOU HAVE A DEATH WISH?"
I jumped again at his voice; remaining silent. He must have noticed my fear and walked up to me with a regretful glare, "I'm sorry. It's just- you don't know what you've gotten yourself into by coming here. Why are you even here?"
I had to come up with a lie. Fast.
He clearly has a sense of loyalty to Pan; I concluded to tell the half truth. My composure faulting, I speak up, "I came to save Marcus. It was my fault he came here, I was the one who heard the pipes. So, when I heard the pipes again, I knew it was my last chance to save him..."
He takes a deep sigh, "You shouldn't have heard the tune-Nevermind that, you can't save him. There's no escape."
I wanted to tell him about the deal I made with Rumple, but a part of me was wise enough to not trust him. Not yet anyway.
"I gathered that... I just didn't know I would end up here..."
"What did you think then? Did you seriously not think this through? Random boys going missing and never returning. It's common sense to not fall for it."
He was right; he knew I wasn't that stupid to fall for that. But I couldn't tell him the truth. Although I hate lying to him, I knew I could convince him otherwise.
"I wasn't thinking. The second I heard the music, all rational thoughts left the window. He was gone for an entire year! I missed him... surely you would feel the same for Cory-"
I stop myself. I went too far. Mentioning his younger brother; I can't imagine how much he must miss him. There was a long period of silence between us. He looked utterly dismayed. His golden blonde hair, still a shrivelled mess, covering his eyes as he looked down at the ground.
"I'm so, so sorry."
"Don't be. Your right. I wouldn't have given it a second thought."
I'm glad we had that in common:
The nature to protect.
END OF FLASHBACK
Thomas's grip was strong, but never enough to hurt me. I whisper while tugging at my arm, "Let me go."
"You and I both know this won't end well." He tries to maintain his chuckle, but that only sets me off. I storm up to Marcus, there was one other lost boy by his side, he looks at me like he's about to get a beat in. But suddenly shakes that thought off and grins. He figured out I have no control of him here. Thomas was behind me, although he hated where this was going; I knew he had my back.
"Don't. Touch. Frankie."
My smug look sets him off, but I was proud that I could manage to make this about Frankie, instead of our past.
"And what are you going to do about it. You can't tell me what to do."
Now he's really gonna regret that.
"Just leave him alone or you'll regret it." With my one finger on his chest, I look down at him since I grew taller than him throughout the time he was gone.
"Make me."
I take a step back. He responds to my silence with a smug look.
"Come on, make me. Fight me." He tempts.
I punch him at the jaw. Worst mistake ever.
Everything turns into a haze. Before I realise it, he tackled me to the ground. He starts to throw punches. Brutal punches. It was then I realised I was losing the fight. I look around, ignoring the obvious group of lost boys enjoying the show, and noticed a rock. I reach for it, but it's too far. On instinct, the rock moves towards my hand too quick before I realised what I had done. A faint trail of smoke following with it. I throw it at his head and he's knocked unconscious. A bloodied mark on his temple, I immediately feel guilt and check him. I check his pulse, along with the mark on his head. He seems fine fortunately.
I hear cheering in the background and I'm rounded up by the arms by two lost boys. I guess I won the fight. They cheer and praise me, but I'm left speechless; what did I just do?
But amongst all the rally, there was one boy in bewilderment; Thomas. His fearful look said it all and he shook his head while slowly escaping the clearing. He saw me move the rock.
How did that rock move?
Disbelief clouded my mind as I thought of plausible explanations. The ground shaking. Maybe. The wind. Not likely. I was pulled out of my thoughts when the cheering abruptly came to a holt. Pan made his way through the clearing.
A dagger in his hand; he stands taller than me by a few inches. His jaw clenched and furrows his brows at as unconscious Marcus on the ground. You could hear a pin drop. It was then I realised I broke Pan's rules: never fight with another lost boy.
He clears his throat, "Who did this?"
All eyes on me and no protection from Thomas; I had to face this one myself. I took a deep breathe, "It was me."
All eyes burning into my skull; while my eyes only landed on the boy infront of me.
Marcus slowly eased into consciousness as he took in his surroundings. I realised this was his best chance to tell Peter of my identity, but knew the implications if he did. I would probably be banished and his secret would be revealed: Marcus isn't lost.
Pan's eyes shifted to Mark, "Is this true?"
He looked at me with guilty look. I guess he realised he went too far. "No, it was me."
I smiled. It was a comfort to know he still cared about me, since he is willing to take the blame for me. However, I would never let him do so. Peter looked baffled by our answer and lifted a brow, "You know the rules, so one of you will be taking the punishment...unless you both want to take it."
There was a pause as Mark and I discussed glances. I eyed him down to shut him up and spoke up, "I threw the first punch. It was my fault."
"But-", before mark could even oppose, I stared him down again and he remained silent. Peter was throughly confused by the way we acted around one another. After all, most lost boys would be angry to be knocked out. He questioned, "Am I missing something here?"
"No." I said immediately.
Mark gave me a look; uncertainty written all over his face. Can we lie to Pan? It wasn't one of the rules, but I guess it didn't have to be since, it's common sense.
Pan was definitely angered by my obvious lie and stalked up to me, his dagger threatening my throat, "I'll ask you one more time, am I missing something?"
Marcus panicked, "We're brothers."
I gave Mark a death stare. How utterly stupid could he be? My identity was a big enough risk as is, but now he has to associate him with me. Once my secret is out, it won't only be me who is in trouble.
Pan retracted his dagger and flared up and down at me. Our resemblance wasn't uncanny, apart from our nose and skin tone. I didn't really look like my family much at all. My mother once told me I only resembled my grandmother, who apparently was an evil woman. I had never met her, but apparently she wasn't mentally stable.
Pan placed his dagger back in it's scabbard and backed away, "Put him in the cage." Then he looked at Mark, "you better sort out your family ordeals or next time, you both will be punished."
A lost boy- by the name Ian I think- ties a rag around my wrists. It was loose and I nodded my head thank you for it. He nodded back. Pan intervened by grabbing my shirt at my shoulder and taking me out of the clearing.
"I don't appreciate meaties getting in trouble in the first week." I realised there was a thick British accent to his voice. Where was he from? Scrap that-
Who even is he? I never actually considered the fact that I don't know anything about him, apart from his name.
We were following a path I've never been through before. I stayed silent; lost in the maze of my thoughts.
Is Peter Pan his real name? Why does he take boys from their families? Does he have family? Why doesn't the lost boys gang up on him, then he most certainly wouldn't win.
"What happened between you and your brother?"
I was awaken from my thoughts, why would he care?
"It doesn't matter-"
He interrupted, "it does when it intervenes with everyone's training."
"I'm sorry. It won't happen again."
There was a long pause, then he asked, "why did you take the blame?"
I was surprised he was so intrigued by the whole thing.
"I don't know. He's my younger brother; he's always been my responsibility."
He hummed, as if my answer explained the whole situation. Eventually we reached a cage that hanged on a rope and my heart dropped to my feet. I couldn't stand in that thing without slumping my back. My feet trembled and Pan noticed, "I'm not in the mood for a fight, just go in and I'll be back same time tomorrow."
"I can't-" A girly voice slipping through my throat.
He opened the cage nonchalantly. How could he be so cruel. Would he put Marcus in this cage if he took the blame? Or even Frankie if he broke a rule? I shook my head while looking down to hide my tears. I can't go in there, especially through the night.
I know it's stupid to be scared of the dark, but how could I help it. I don't know who's hiding there. I hate it.
"Either you voluntarily go in there or I'll throw you in."
I sighed and went inside. He closed the cage and whispered under his breath while locking it.
"W-what did you do?"
"Don't worry. It's just a spell."
"A spell? Like a wizard?"
He chuckled loudly, putting me to shame, "I guess you could say that."
"How do you do it?"
"I wouldn't get too eager, it takes a long time to perfect magic, if you have any that is."
"You didn't answer my question."
"Why should I? I am your leader."
"I don't know the first thing about you." I gripped the bars of the cage.
He stood closer; our faces inches apart, "There's not much to know."
"I doubt that."
"What about you?"
"What about me?"
"Marcus had never mentioned about having an older brother. It makes me wonder why."
"You don't know the first thing about me."
"I don't need to... and the same applies to me." And with that he left. Great.
Hours went by and I was lying on my back to prevent neck cramps. Until I saw Thomas in the distance with a bowl in his hands. He kept a good distance and just stared at me. There was something in his eyes, curious or uncertainty - no, it was fear.
"Thomas" I breathed under my breath.
"Why didn't you tell me? You know I care about you. And now I don't know if I can trust you anymore."
"I promise I didn't know what I did. I didn't even mean to move the rock, it just did it itself like it had its own instincts."
He was angered, "Your trying to tell me the rock grew legs and walked up to you?"
"No. I didn't know what happened, I've never done anything like that before. Please trust me; understand that I would never lie to you."
"I d-don't know. Your whole arrival here screams suspicion..."
"I promise I would never lie to you like this."
"Swear it."
"On who's life?"
"Marcus."
"I swear on Marcus's life that I'm not lying about this."
He sighed and went up to me to lend a bowl full of stew. I took it.
"This is your first time using magic?" I nodded. "How did you do it?"
I thought about it, "It was involuntary I guess. I reached for the rock and before I knew it, it was in my hands." I said as I started to eat my beef stew.
"Have you tried to do it again?"
"No and I don't want to."
His eyes lit up, "Why? You can't deny, this is amazing."
"I don't know what I'm capable of. This is scary. And why didn't you tell me Peter can do magic?"
"I thought Frankie told you everything." He looked up and down at my frustration, "Well apparently not."
"No shit Sherlock."
"Don't get moody with me Harry fucking Potter."
He both laughed. For a minute there was a moment I genuinely felt like we were back at school and having a laugh. The laughter died down and we just smiled at the fact that we hadn't changed much since he left.
"Can you do it again? I understand that your scared, but this isn't something you should fear. It could actually save your life some day. It technically did today..."
"I wouldn't say that-"
He interrupted, "yes I would, are you trying to tell me that you were winning the fight?"
"It wasn't that bad."
"Yes because it was awful."
"Whatever. I don't want to."
"I have a point. If you want to make it out of here alive with your brother then you should learn how to do more than moving a little rock."
I took a moment to think about his words, "I guess your right."
"I always am. Now," he looked around to pick a twig up from the ground and gave it to me, "try something with it."
I furrowed my brows, "what exactly?"
"I don't know. Anything you can."
I placed the twig on the floor of the cage and let my hand hover over it. I focused on the stick, imagining it moving to my hands. I could hear Thomas moving closer to the cage, almost breathing into my ear.
I turn to him, "Will you stop that."
He backed away, "sorry."
I went back to the stick and after five minutes of nothing I felt gave up.
"Are you even trying."
"Yes! I don't know why it's not working." I was disappointed in myself and Thomas could tell.
"Nevermind it, we can try another time. I'll see you tomorrow morning." And he took the bowl and left.
Leaving me alone in the dark.