Bennett's son Jobbs decided to talk to himself about Life so Bennett, being annoyed with his son who talks to himself, yelled "SHUT UP!" So loud, it startled Jobbs.
Bennett hated it when Jobbs talked to himself.
💎
💓
Jobbs felt bad because his dad was also doing his homework for him due to a joint issue Jobbs had.
Jobbs stopped writing on his notepad and gave it up for seven days.
Jobbs made Bennett angry constantly with Jobbs' mental health issues, physical issues, Jobbs wasn't healthy or very active, pretty lazy and Jobbs knew it and was ashamed of It...
💎
💓
Bennett knew Jobbs needed help at the time but honestly, since he didn't see any other use for Jobbs other than to look good as a parent, Bennett left Jobbs to fend for himself a lot.
Jobbs didn't do much except go to the bathroom, eat, sleep. Jobbs was never happy about it and wanted to be better and was ashamed he didn't put in the effort.
💎
💓
Jobbs felt useless, Jobbs couldn't see a proper use for himself. Jobbs thought: "If nobody likes me and I'm lazy and I don't do a lot for others, even though I do try to give them good emotional support and I do help people, even if it's online and I try to make them happy, safe and get them out of abusive situations... Okay, so, I might not be useless. What's the use of a human who is alive but does nothing? Is human life worth so much that just staying alive is good? Humans must be like diamonds, even if you don't do anything, you're valuable, but diamonds are only good if others want them, and if humans are valuable even if nobody wants them, that means we're worth more than diamonds and Gold! Still doesn't mean we should be lazy, Though."
💎
💓
Jobbs felt like a waste, he thought "What a waste to have someone so valuable you can't take them out by killing them but they do nothing, making them a forced waste of space." Bennett wasn't like this and saw some use in his son, which is why he didn't kill Jobbs.
💎
💓
Jobbs THOUGHT "A human that doesn't do anything seems worthless even if others like him enough to let his laziness go. It just feels like God just wants the lazy people to die. Even if I lived alone and didn't place burden on others, I am a burden to myself."
💎
💓
Jobbs had a midlife crisis at 12-years-old thinking "I still feel not worth enough to stay alive, in all honesty, if a lazy person and a rich person who would help others if he was alive were going to die and only one could live, and I had to pick, it sounds logical to save the one that helps others because the lazy person has no benefit to others, other than himself."
💎
💓
Jobbs rubbed his face, thinking those prior thoughts made him feel like he was selfish, giving into a doctrine of "If you can't help ME, WHY SHOULD YOU EXIST? YOU AREN'T WORTH ANYTHING IF YOU HELP YOURSELF." He knew that each person was valuable even if they helped themselves because they should help themselves because they are valuable.
💎
💓
Jobbs THOUGHT to himself *I would have to find a way to save both because they are both people who are, In God's eyesight, have a different kind of worth that allows them to be as valuable as each other in and of themselves just due to being humans, humans have a special type of worth that even humans themselves are not aware of that. strangely, allows for the need to save both humans due to how much worth a human in general has. I seem to care about people more than the general population."
💎
💓
Jobbs felt guilty that he thought of offing a poor innocent guy that didn't hurt anyone who had feelings, thoughts, and emotions and said out loud "I can help the lazy person be better after getting them into a non-lazy habit after I save both the rich man and lazy man. It is extraordinary that I would want to save them both. I'd have to do the same for my own child if mine was the lazy man because if I would do it for a lazy stranger, why not my own flesh and blood?"
💎
💓
Jobbs thought "Jesus died on the cross for all so they would have great lives then Jesus rose up again from the dead three days later, he died for the lazy, the whores, the evil, all of us. All of us so that we can be in heaven with him after getting saved, repenting of our sons and changing our lives. Obviously, God is better than us, because most of us would see no harm in letting the lazy man die as he cannot help us, and since a lot of people are selfish, we'd see that as a good reason to let the lazy man die. I am most likely wrong about people in America letting him die because we hate murder, so I guess Americans and any culture that values human life wouldn't want anyone to die, most people sure aren't killing themselves for some lazy dude they learned to devalue as a kid."
💎
💓
❤️
Jobbs thought about how people save lives so that others can live happily, even do things that seem useless but makes them and even others happy. We even save lives even if that person will be the only one alive, just so that they can be alive and help themselves and be happy, even if it's on their own, to exist and live life.
💎
💓
Jobbs realized "We are all worth a lot, even if we don't even meet people. Jesus worked to save us all, not just the ones we selfishly think will make us have pleasure."
💎
💓
To be continued...