Behind his wise gaze and intimidating poise,
Was a heart, hidden deep, from the betrayal of the world.
He remembered so much, how he treasured those same angels,
Whom after a while turned their backs, their hearts now covered in hate.
He was often told to be the most ruthless,
As ruthless as any demon in existence,
The one that would be willing to break a few rules,
So to keep the order, properly and unmoved.
He rarely smiles, restraint is his character,
No matter how funny, he rarely break into pure laughter.
The other archangels notices this, he's sometimes out of place,
But he just lost his smile, since he had to send Beelzebub away.
He had punished many angels before,
Those who failed to keep the order,
Slowly, he lost his smile, his trust, his pity,
More so when he knew, he can't do anything help them, to remedy.
If only Michael isn't as soft and forgiving,
Perhaps this cruel obligation, he won't be handling,
But everyone knew that Michael is too kind,
And Selaphiel is much fitted, to cause others demise.
"The angel, that is as heartless as a demon,"
Such comments regarding him had been common.
His sharp unloving eyes, and his cold deep voice,
Hearing him joke around, was a rare thing of course.
It had been so long since he felt genuinely happy,
As he is constantly reminded, of his brothers he once cursed for eternity,
He felt a bit of guilt, a bit of sadness seeing the result,
But it was his mission to punish them,
There was no other choice.
The sinners, are given consequences,
And the good, are blessed,
Nothing more, nothing less,
That is how the world is,
But those he threw away were his friends.
Along with Uriel, they watch as their brothers fell from heaven,
Their innocence, their grace, their roles, all stolen,
At first, he wanted to lend a hand to them,
But Uriel reminded, that they have much bigger problems.
They are not allowed to question, to pity those who fought,
They are mere servants, following orders that come forth.
His heart, his heart that once melt at the sight of those same angels he deeply loved,
Now is covered in something, so very hard.
Raphael noticed Selaphiel make banters with Ken,
He felt amazed, is this really real or a facade?
Is Selaphiel truly happy? Is his words not empty?
No one knows what's running in his mind,
So he just waited patiently.
Selaphiel noticed that Raphael had been staring at him,
So he gave the same frozen look and greeted him.
"Ah, look, Raphael, the angel of humility is here,
What can I offer you?" Questions then began to fill.
Raphael gestured, that he come with him in private,
As Ken felt the need to snoop, but in the end, decided against it,
He kept his head the other way, pretending not to care,
As Selaphiel sighed, and moved to where Raphael's says.
On his room, that's only covered with stones,
The two began to talk, in low hushed tones.
"You look hurt, despite the words and the smile you wear,
Selaphiel, is there something I can be of help?"
Selaphiel felt shocked, as he had never had a conversation with Raphael such as this,
But inside, he was touched and pleased.
"I am happy, did your eyes not see?"
"You rarely break a smile, and when you do, it's accompanied by tears."
"Since when have you suggested I only smile as I cry?"
"You did it once, the very first time you lied.
You took Lucifer's punishment yourself, the very first time Lucifer questioned God,
You told us you were the one who influenced him,
Because to watch the Seraphs punish your little brother,
You simply can't."
"I have smiled before, haven't I?"
"But the one you did when talking to Ken, looked like that smile,
Are you hiding something? Some sort of plan?"
"I won't, you're overreacting, pay me no mind."
"How can I? When I recognize it very clearly?
You're the angel willing to sacrifice anything,
Just to keep things in order and functioning.
You knew you'd be punished, and we all saw how your face looked after the beating,
Your other eye almost gone blind, you smiled even after the suffering.
That smile, that wide smile you gave that day,
Was the one you gave today.
Your eyes back then, as you recite all those words,
They look depressed, and rather hurt."
"Raphael, it isn't the time to think about how I feel,
We have a lot of humans to take care of, and I am fine, is it clear?
*sigh* You are worried for nothing, just take care of yourself,
If you keep worrying about me, you'll lose your head."
Raphael frowned, and did not like the fact he's still denying,
"How sly and secretive, I'd punish you myself if I caught you lying,"
Raphael fumed, and it surprised Selaphiel even more,
"How funny the way you look, if nobody had told."
Selaphiel dismissis Raphael's concern,
As he walked away, aiding the humans once more.
"Selaphiel," Raphael said before he completely go away,
He stopped and turned, "What is it that you want? Tell it right away."
"If you have problems, and burdens please tell us,
Don't keep it buried in your heart.
I know you always like to keep things, but please don't keep those feelings,
Let them all out, I know you're still lying."
Selaphiel sighed, "I was just admiring Ken finding love in such darkness,
Something I cannot do, with all the madness.
I tried to find my heart, I tried to look for my brother,
But when I saw him, with such greedy smile,
He's no longer my beloved Lucifer.
He is a monster, someone that can't be loved,
When he injured my wings, he didn't felt sorry, he laughed.
Oh how funny, that those you love the most,
Once they betray you, the anger rise ten times more.
I trust him the most, that young angel I taught to sing,
I cherished him the most, that small angel that always harm his wings.
He is smart, is bright, is innocent once,
I told him everything and loved him, but his ambitions won.
I tried to find it, Raphael, the love and motivation to keep on fighting till the end,
But dear brother, have you forgotten?
Who we're fighting against were once our friends.
I simply feel tired of being emotionless,
Watching as they fall, to either their darkness or their death,
I am not pitiless, nor am I enjoying causing suffering,
If I could curse myself than them, I would,
But I knew it won't change anything.
Some beings are just...rotten,
They will enjoy causing pain and burden,
I tried to save Lucifer from his sin but failed,
I have no heart to give away,
If almost all pretend.
Raphael, I cannot, even if I want to, show all myself anymore,
I am simply afraid, of what they'd do if they know.
Do not ask me again, to tell you my burdens,
For my heart cannot allow, revealing my weakness."
Selaphiel said as he looks at Raphael seriously,
"Yesterday I felt, a sudden sadness rushed to me,
But that is all I will tell you, and if I smile, pretend it's true,
Just lend your efforts to the humans, they need it more than I do."
Raphael was about to speak,
Until they heard Gabriel talk, though his voice was weak,
"Oi, I finished my shift,
Someone lead the protective barrier, I think I need what the humans call 'sleep'",
He yawned as he hold his shoulders,
He quickly stands straight however, after witnessing he may be between something serious,
"Uh, did I bother something in particular?"
"Well, nothing at all," Selaphiel said as Raphael agreed in final.
"Ah, I thought I bothered something,
Also, Michael is leading a prayer, so be quiet if you're going to barge in,
But one thing is for sure, I need some rest,
My shoulders hurt so much," Gabriel tearfully said.
Raphael passes by Selaphiel, still hurt he is denied,
As Selaphiel only sighed, (He wouldn't understand),
Gabriel was still confused, of why they were so silent and tensed,
"Uh, are you sure guys? Is it something I said?"
...
Gabriel's POV:
They're ignoring me, huh? Are they mad?
Why is Raphael frowning, did Selaphiel do something bad?
And...wait, I really need to rest now,
So maybe, I'd pour my thoughts on them later,
I can't help but yawn.
I walked ahead, and I thought that was the end of it,
But I can't shake off the feeling, that something's off with them,
After I woke up, they barely glance at each other's direction,
This isn't good, we can't afford an inside division!
It doesn't help that Raphael is too shy to approach,
And...well, Selaphiel too scary to talk to!
I need to discuss this with Superior Michael,
After all, this isn't what should be happening,
When most of the circumstances are already unwell.