"Show me what you've got." Kakashi prompted, before all three disappeared in clouds of smoke. 'That... wasn't Shunshin. What are they doing?'
In the canopy several metres away, downwind from the jounin, three genin crouched on the branches of a tree, observing him. "He's not coming after us." Naruto noted, before Sasuke flicked the back of his head.
"Of course he isn't. He has the bells, we have to go to him if we want to pass," Sasuke whispered, ignoring Naruto's grumbles. "Nice work with the clones. I didn't know you could dispel them at will like that." he muttered, deciding not to antagonise the blond any more than he had to.
Sakura leapt up to land beside Naruto, frowning. "So what do we do? There's no way we can take on Kakashi of the Sharingan ourselves." she murmured, before Naruto gave an evil smile.
"Guys, I think I know what to do."
OoOoO
(52 minutes remaining for the bell test)
Kakashi was growing bored. Frankly, he'd expected one of them to make a grab for the bells by now. Naruto was not what one would call patient, and Sasuke had enough of a competitive streak to at least test himself against stronger opponents, regardless of how good an idea it was.
"Okay, new sensei! You ready to face the might of Uzumaki Naruto?" Now that was more like it. Kakashi turned to face the blond, who was set in a combat stance, his arms in a cross-shaped seal. Kakashi stood up, rolling his shoulder.
"Before we start this..." Naruto began, smirking. "Can I have a bell?" Kakashi blinked. That wasn't supposed to happen.
"No. This is a test of your skills, not your manners. But I thank you for being polite."
"Oh, come on! Please?" Okay, now he was whining. Kakashi had seen many reactions to the bell test. Anger, fear, confusion... This kind of petty childishness was a new one though.
"I'm not going to give you a bell, Naruto. Now show me what you can do."
"I'll be your best friend!" Well, that wouldn't be boring, whatever else...
"No. You understand that we're fighting, don't you?"
"You're fighting, I'm being reasonable and diplomatic." Kakashi stared at the boy, who beamed at him in a manner scarily reminiscent of Gai. He actually believed what he was saying.
"Naruto, just take this seriously-"
"I am." The Uzumaki interrupted. "If we don't even try to use diplomacy before beating the shit out of one another, one of us is going to start another war. Especially someone with my... abilities. I have to make sure I don't lose myself, but it's hard, because... I actually enjoy fighting. When we were in Nami, I was enjoying the fight with Haku and those mercenaries, I was happy when they got hurt. I-I think I might be a bad person."
'That was... Kami, this kid is worse off than I thought.' "Naruto, I-" he began, before a swarm of clones bombarded him from all sides, catching him off-guard. 'Little brat was faking it the whole time! ... I'm impressed.'
A jingling noise brought his attention back to the matter at hand. "Nice try, but your clones, while impressive, are still genin level. I am not." he smiled, before systematically eliminating the swarm. He had to get creative with some of them, using one as an improvised flail, before noting that some of them hadn't vanished. Since Naruto couldn't use normal Bunshin to save his life, that meant...
"Okay, which one are you?" he asked, seeing the intangible clones blink in shock. "The Pink one or the Girly one?" he continued, fishing for a reaction. The copies faded from view as Sakura seemed to simply materialise, dropping her genjutsu. That kind of skill with illusions was not something you usually saw in a genin.
"I'm Plan B," she seethed, Naruto shuffling a few feet further away from her as she suddenly grinned, eyes shining. "But I'm glad we get to see plan C in action, she grinned, slamming a fist into the ground and raising a small cloud of dust. Naruto did the same, Kakashi growing paranoid at the sight.
'They're not running, so it's not a smokescreen... Why isn't it falling back down? Oh, poop...' Kakashi groaned as the dust formed a swirling barrier around him. He heard Sasuke chuckle darkly as he stepped into view.
"Ninpo: Sajin Kekkai. Knew I remembered something from the guy we fought. Now, Kakashi, if you throw the bells out to us, I'll drop the jutsu. Otherwise, we get to test Naruto's theory about dust exploding." he smirked confidently.
The trio stood in silence for an uncomfortable few seconds before Sakura blanched. "He's going to wait out the time limit! Naruto, what was the next step in the plan?"
Naruto shrugged, turning to Sasuke. "Try it. He's either gonna wait us out or escape if we don't do anything." Sasuke nodded, beginning the seal sequence for the Gokakyu, before a pair of hands grabbed his ankles, pulling him into the ground.
"Very astute observations, but you need to work on your awareness." Kakashi scolded, sweatdropping along with Sasuke when Naruto pulled out a scroll and pen, scribbling down the advice. 'I genuinely can't tell if he's a genius or an idiot.'
"Are you finis-" he tried, before Sasuke's head was replaced by a cloud of smoke. "Okay, seriously, how do you keep doing that? I can tell it's not Shunshin- and you two are also gone. Fantastic. At least I can catch up on my reading."
OoOoO
"Right, new plan. Anyone have one?" Naruto whispered, the three of them having escaped by the timely intervention of emergency clones. Naruto silently called up more as they began talking tactics.
"Okay, we nearly had him with the Sajin Kekkai before he used that escape technique... unless he used water to neutralise it... or wind to blow it away," Sasuke pointed out. "Our best bet is to find something to distract him, like in plan A. But we'll need to buy time. Naruto, do that."
"Nyanana Nya na." Naruto mimicked, though he did as asked, calling up roughly twenty clones. "Any more and they're too hard to hide." he explained as Sakura opened her mouth to ask. "You guys, go be distracting. We're good at that." he ordered, the clones noticeably more subdued than the original.
Sakura stopped to think for a second. "Iruka-sensei said he really loves those books he carries around, right?"
OoOoO
(37 minutes remaining)
Kakashi glanced at the last Kage Bunshin, pulling his hitae-ate back down over his red eye as he did so. The clones were easily dispatched once you got close enough, but they were opportunistic, taking suicidal gambits to try to get the bells. Pulling his book back out, he looked at the bored-looking clone out the corner of his eye. "Aren't you going to try your luck?"
"Hey, we were only supposed to stall you while the boss planned something. I'm not gonna get myself exploded for no reason." the Bunshin retorted, hands up in surrender. Kakashi was less than amused.
"So you tell me that you're supposed to be distracting me? You're not great at this." It felt strange to talk to someone who was essentially a chakra fragment. Still, Naruto would be getting the memories sooner or later. Probably later, by the way this one was acting. Still, he was a little uncomfortable when it flopped down next to him and gazed up at the clouds.
"So what you reading?" it asked, throwing Kakashi out of his musings. He simply pointed to the name on the book's spine, making it easy for the clone to read it.
"So Jiraiya-sama wrote more than just the one book? I haven't seen that one before. You mind if I have a look?" it asked innocently, Kakashi choking silently behind his mask. If he wound up corrupting sensei's son, the afterlife would be... uncomfortable. Then again... the boy clearly had already read one of them, so he wasn't to blame. Nothing wrong with giving him a second example of fine literature.
"Knock yourself out." he replied cheerily, tossing the book in his hand at the copy as he pulled an identical one from inside his vest. It helped to carry spares, seeing as some people would take offence at his hobbies. Fire-based offence.
The clone began flicking through pages, settling at what Kakashi remembered to be a very informative section. He blinked as the blond's face attempted to pale and redden at the same time. Ah, youth- oh Log, he was spending too much time with Gai. Back to Icha-Icha... Oh, Sayuri-chan, you naughty girl...
"Fucking pervert!" came a shout, as he caught a book headed straight for his visible eye. "And I thought it might actually be a decent book. Fuck that, I'm going for ramen." the clone snapped, storming off towards the village. Some people just didn't appreciate good writing.
OoOoO
(32 minutes remaining)
"Uzumaki Naruto Rendan!" a swarm of clones called, attacking Kakashi from all sides and forcing him to use both hands in fighting them off. "You can't block us all, sensei!" one crowed, before it saw three tomoe in the man's left eye. "Oh, dear." it muttered, before a swift chop dispersed it into smoke.
"Retreat!" the original called, Sasuke using the flare from a fireball to cover their escape, Sakura dropping all attempts at using her genjutsu. "Plan D is a no-go! Regroup!"
Kakashi scoffed. To think they would threaten his book like that.
The nerve of some people.
"Okay, we've got one more decent plan, and that's about it," Sasuke groaned, glancing at Naruto. "Start working on them while Sakura and I distract him. Actually, if you can spare them, some emergency clones would be great. I don't like the idea of losing... if this doesn't work, I'm going Mangekyou on him." he concluded heatedly.
"Sasuke-kun, won't that damage your eyes?" Sakura asked, concerned. "Should you really be wasting it in a test like this?" The Uchiha shrugged non-commitally in response.
"If I lose this, I'll never be strong enough for what I need to do. If I'm not strong enough to protect the people who matter most to me, I'll do whatever I have to to get that strength." Sasuke declared, the two of them setting up a ring of traps to protect Naruto, dimly aware of Kakashi approaching at a leisurely pace, not even trying to hide himself.
OoOoO
"Okay, you had some good ideas, but your execution could use some work," Kakashi mused, before Sakura leapt from the next tree with a kick, which he managed to catch, though it left him open to Sasuke's follow-up, blocked with a raised leg, keeping him off-balance long enough for Sakura to escape his grip. The kids were actually forcing him to take them seriously. Not go all-out, of course, but still better than many chuunin he'd seen, never mind genin. That was without their one-man army, even.
"ALRIGHT, ASSHOLE!" came the cry, as Sasuke and Sakura fled. Like, ohKamirunrunrun type fleeing. Dozens of Naruto clones leapt out from cover, swarming Kakashi. "New technique for you! Uzumaki Hijutsu: Fuin Shougeki!" they called, all of them rushing forwards with tags hissing. Kakashi blinked. The first clone detonated. In a swirling red vortex. The second... melted. And they just kept coming.
Kakashi ran.
"Get back here! Guys, throw me!" came a loud voice, followed by a brief but impressive burst of lightning.
Kakashi ran fast.
OoOoO
(24 minutes remaining)
"Okay, any more ideas? I know you can hold out for a long time, Naruto, but making this many clones and having their chakra go to waste can't be easy," Sakura summarised, seeing Naruto pant slightly. Sasuke stood near the top of a tree, keeping watch as several explosions of various colours, sizes and odours erupted from several metres away. "Your clones and seals are our main advantage right now. We need to keep that up as long as we can."
"Very good, Sakura," chirped a voice, as Kakashi flickered into view, chopping Naruto's neck before he got a chance to respond, knocking the blond unconscious. "But it's hardly fair for Naruto to do the lion's share, is it now?" he asked rhetorically, lazily evading projectiles from the other two genin as he scooped the blond up. "I think he could use a little nap, don't you agree?" 'They'd've already done enough to pass, if this were the real deal, but it's obvious that they're using Naruto as their main line of offense and defense. Let's see if the other two come up with anything this interesting without him.'
He vanished in a swirl of leaves, leaving behind a swearing Sasuke and fuming Sakura. His own Kage bunshin was doing an admirable job of fleeing in terr- er, distracting Naruto's summoned army. Well, not much of an army at this point, seeing as most of them had died in hilariously impractical ways. Trust Naruto to make failed sealing attempts into a viable threat.
OoOoO
(13 minutes remaining)
"What in the Sage's name are we supposed to do now?" Sasuke hissed, wrapping a bandage around his arm, where a summoned dog had bitten him. Those things had better not have rabies. "We've tried damn near everything we could think of!"
And they had. Using a mixture of Mizuryu and Gokakyou to simulate the Kirigakure no jutsu, using Raihadou with a barrage of wire traps, courtesy of Sakura, even swarming the area with intangible Bunshin in hopes of keeping the man distracted. Nothing worked.
The worst part, though, was how close they'd gotten. They'd actually managed to touch the bells twice, once each. If they hadn't lost Naruto, they'd have gotten even closer, probably even grabbed one of the bells. It was maddening.
"So, how's it going?" came a voice as Naruto ambled up, like nothing was wrong. "You guys manage it yet?" he asked brightly, pulling out a bowl of ramen and slurping it up noisily. He paled as Sakura approached, cracking her knuckles.
"So, you had time to go get ramen, but not t come and help us?" she asked in a disturbingly sweet voice. Naruto hastily swallowed the mouthful of noodles before pleading with her.
"I'm a clone, Sakura-chan! It's not my fault- wait, what happened to the boss?" he asked, glancing around, seeing no trace of Naruto Prime. The explanation was hurried. What they weren't expecting was a sudden grin from the blond, who gestured for Sasuke to approach, while asking Sakura to keep watch. Not that she didn't eavesdrop.
"No!" Sasuke snapped after a couple of hushed sentences. "I'm not doing it!"
"You've done it before, what's the big deal?"
"The big deal is I am not doing that again. Once was more than enough." Something inaudible, before Sasuke spoke up again. "I don't care how well it works, I'm not doing it."
"Look, man, I'm nearly out of chakra as is. If I could do it myself, I would, but we don't have that luxury right now. I'll try and find the boss before I pop, but this is the best plan we've got right now. Word of advice, though, don't let Sakura see it unless you're out of kunai range." With that said, the clone took to the trees, running in a seemingly random direction. Sasuke, face unusually red, landed beside the pinkette and began heading towards Kakashi's chakra signature.
"What's wrong, Sasuke-kun?" Sakura asked as she followed him closely. He turned to look at her with an utterly defeated expression.
"Sakura, no-one is to hear of this plan. Ever." he sighed, voice lacking any kind of authority or confidence. Sakura was now worried. What the hell kind of plan was this?
OoOoO
Naruto was shaken out of an extremely pleasant dream involving the Sandaime bowing to Naruto's totally awesome ninja skills. (a/n: he's still twelve... and kind of an idiot. But we love him anyway.) He grumbled as he looked at his own face, the clone's eyebrow raised in question.
"I can't believe this. Kakashi didn't even use double knots to tie you up. Either he was being nice, or he's a complete amateur," the clone muttered as it loosened the ropes around Naruto's arms. "Now get your ass in gear. I'm basically out of chakra and the other two are going to try one of the best ideas we've had. You don't want to miss that."
"What idea would that be?" Naruto asked, grinning. He had so many good ones, after all.
"You remember the time Sasuke met that kid with the eyebrows?" the clone cackled. "It's the same thing, except this time, we're making him do it on purpose." Naruto wasn't even listening anymore, instead heading to where he could feel Kakasho's totally unsuppressed chakra.
OoOoO
(4... no, 3 minutes remaining)
"I'm impressed, Sasuke. Not many genin could come back and try again after being beaten so thoroughly." Kakashi snarked, once again unveiling the sharingan he was famous for. Something was wrong, however, seeing as Sasuke looked... uncomfortable as he made a ram seal. Sasuke had barely flinched when one of Kakashi's ninken had bitten him. Kakashi focused on the boy, who was gathering chakra in preparation for something.
"Kage Henge no Jutsu: Oiroke no Jutsu." Sasuke whispered, a cloud of smoke briefly appearing before it faded to reveal a blushing, dark-haired teenage girl, completely nude aside from some strategically placed wisps of smoke. Turning red as she faced the silver-haired jounin, she blew a kiss at him.
Kakashi stopped thinking. Some part of him was desperately trying to point out that this was an illusion, even as another part, sounding suspiciously like one of the Sannin, was cheering in appreciation of the technique. So distracted was he that he never saw Sakura's shuriken slicing through the rope that held the bells, not even reacting until a giggling Naruto snatched them up. The blond ran back to stand beside his teammates as Sasuke dropped the transformation, a mortified Sakura wandering out of the bushes.
"I hate you so much for making me do that, dobe." Sasuke growled darkly as he snatched a bell, Sakura taking the other one.
"If it's a stupid idea and it works, then it's not a stupid idea. Plus, now you can say you beat a jounin with a transformation."
Sakura spoke up next, Kakashi still trying to reboot his brain. "I think we might have broken Kakashi-sensei," she said worriedly, before smacking Naruto with enough force to knock him to the ground. "WHY WOULD YOU MAKE SASUKE-KUN DO THAT? WHY?"
"Sakura, he's unconscious, he can't-" Sasuke began, before she pointed at him, completely undeterred by the sharingan.
"I'll get to you in a minute." she promised, before the timer went off as Kakashi shook his head and clapped once.
"Well done, you three. I'm very impressed, even if you were very... unorthodox in your methods. Meet back here tomorrow at nine for some ninjutsu training." he announced cheerily.
"Why not now?" Naruto gurgled, having awoken from the sound of the timer, but wisely staying down. Kakashi sweatdropped.
"Honestly, I have a lot of questions for your sensei before we get into real training." 'Like what the hell he's been doing with you three...' "Plus, you three ruined my mask, so I'll have to get a new one before I do anything else." he continued, gesturing to the dark red stain in the cloth. Naruto would have face-faulted with the other two, had he not already been quite comfortable on the ground. Pushing himself back, he gave Kakashi a small smile.
"And even if you're late, I can be practicing fuinjutsu while we're here."
Kakashi would not be late to any of Team Seven's meetings for quite some time.