We tarry yet, we are toiling still,
He is gone and he fares the best,
He fought against odds, he struggled up hill,
He has fairly earned his season of rest. - Adam Lindsay Gordon
I sank down to the earth and hugged my arms around me. I let it all out and I let myself remember.
I remembered mom plucking daises and placing one each in our hair. To hear her say it, our hairdo was never complete without it. And then we would laugh at how silly we looked with flowers in our hair.
I remembered the first time we rode our bikes. She quickly got the hang of it while I, clumsy as ever, rode mine into the tree. I remembered riding them everywhere together.
I remembered the first year of junior high. The first time we used make up. The first time we went out on dates.
I remembered the world of senior high. The social strata that was so different from what we were used to. I remembered her foray into the popular crowd and my descent into the background.
I remembered the fights. The jealousy. The jabs. I remembered.
I remembered the accident. I remembered the bleak days ahead. Battle lines and camps forgotten. I remembered. I remembered.
A soft, light laughter floated on the wind and I savoured it.
She told me she would never leave me. Always remember. She said.
And as I fingered the locket about my neck. I knew.
Yes, she was gone physically. But she was still around.
I could feel her presence every time I hugged my parents. Every time I laughed. In my dad's quiet smile. My mom's floral scent. Every time I rode my new bike. Every time.
Our memories kept her alive for us. For me.
And I smiled. A truly sincere smile. And for the first time in years, I truly felt fine.
A buzz in my pants alerted me to my surroundings. I slipped out my phone and unlocked it.
Are U okay? Should I come over? I baked cupcakes.
I chuckled and turned back to the stone.
"That's Violet. Or Vy. She's my friend." I sighed.
"This is going to be hard. It is hard!" I sighed again. "But I promise, to remember."
I stood up and dusted my coat. "Bye Lottie. And I'll try not to take too long to come back."
"Toni! Toni" A high pitched voice called out.
I turned towards the voice and saw a blonde haired girl hightailing it my way.
I smiled. Some people never change. I started towards her then stopped midway.
I turned back towards the stones and waved.
Vy caught up with me. Her face red from all the running.
"Hey" Worry laced her tone. "Are you okay?"
I waved her off. "I'm feeling great actually."
"Are you sure?" Blue eyes bore into my hazel ones.
I smiled. "Never been better"