December 30th, 7450AD

Call me Julius. I am writing this diary entry in my home. The same home where I saw this advertisement online: JOIN YOUR ARMY THIS INSTANT TO DEFEAT REBEL ARMY HAF-5. It was on January 1st.

At first, I was excited to serve my country. Then I saw the second part: ON PLUTO. Oh, gods. It was too late. I'd already pressed JOIN. My wife was horrified. "Oh, what have you gotten yourself into, Jules(that's my nickname)?" "Lots of trouble," I sighed.