"Come on Sori, we're gonna have some cake now" Alea called to me.
I sat on Alea's couch, my arms crossed on the crinkly dress shirt that I absolutely hated wearing. Her father sat next to me and he chattered away about politics and the daily going's of the king.
Back to the present, I absentmindedly cracked my knuckles and I felt the couch shake as Alea's father got a chill and made a retching sound.
"That is genuinely one of the most disgusting things that I have ever heard," He said. He took a deep swig of some alcoholic beverage contained in his wooden goblet.
With each swig, his face turned pinker and he grew steadily louder. I gave him a very mischievous smile and with two quick turns, cracked every vertebra in my back.
"That is repulsive, how do you like doing that?"
"It feels good to me, and the sound is therapeutic to me, but I guess I understand why you'd find it gross" I reply.
"Mergel! Sorian!" Alea's mom shouted. "Get in here, we're ready for cake"
"Coming Vani!" He shouted back.
I stood quickly and flattened out my shirt. I began to walk to the kitchen when I noticed that Mergel was sticking his arms out to me as if he were asking for a hug.
"Could you help me up?" He asked nicely.
I was a guest in their house after all. "Of course"
I grabbed his hands and pulled him up with all my strength, but he was heavy and I almost dropped him. Chuvith as a race are all incredibly tall, and that's coming from someone who is already as tall as any human adult at age fifteen. The average Chuvith is usually between six to seven feet tall, the latter being a whole foot above the average human height.
We both strolled over to the kitchen where Alea and Vani had a beautiful cake on the table and bright blue cone hats on their head. Alea basically shoved me into the chair in front of the cake and forced a blue birthday hat onto my head. Her huge smile was contagious and I couldn't help but start smiling too.
Alea and her parents stood around me, singing a birthday song and dancing around the table. In front of me was a chocolate frosted cake with fifteen candles sticking out of it, each lit with a bright orange flame. I stared blankly at the candles, and then up at a pink-faced Alea who was looking at me with great anticipation in her eyes.
"Are you going to blow them out?" She asked.
"Is that what I'm supposed to do?" I ask.
She tilted her head and looked at me confused. Her parents went silent as they both came to some realization. I wasn't sure why the tone of the room suddenly shifted but I decided to do what Alea suggested and I blew out all the candles.
All three of them cheered, but it felt like the air was heavy now, like something was weighing the happiness down. They tried their hardest to ignore it, but it was still obvious that something was bothering them, but I had no clue what it was.
Mergel came over towards me with a very large knife and normally I wouldn't be frightened, but he was hammered and I didn't trust him not to accidentally remove one of my fingers playing with the knife. Thankfully Vani came to my aid by grabbing his arm and carefully removing the knife from his grasp.
She gave me a funny look and told Mergel to wait on the couch for his slice of cake. She began to cut rather large slices of cake away from the whole and plate them nicely on expensive-looking china. I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to go and wait on the couch too, or stay here and sit in awkward silence.
Vani cleared that up quickly. "If you'd like, you can go wait on the couch and I'll bring you a slice of cake"
"Ok thank you Mrs. Leowynn, would you like me to bring Mergel and Alea their slices?" I offered.
"You are such a sweetheart, I would greatly appreciate that, make sure you come back though, I cut you an extra-large piece" She winked at me and I felt all warm inside.
I grabbed the two slices of cake off the table and brought them to Alea and Mergel who were waiting patiently on the couch. Mergel drained yet another goblet of what I assume was Chuvith Ale since I could smell it on his breath from several feet away.
Vani handed me a large slice of cake and my eyes bulged just looking at it. The four of us sat around the fire pit in the middle of her living room and made small talk, Vani told us about a new book that she was reading. Mergel told me that his firewood and kindling shop has been doing exceptionally well, and Alea told us about a new book that she is trying to write. They all looked at me for something to contribute to the conversation, but I had nothing.
"So, Sorian," Vani says, breaking the silence. "Alea tells us that you've been working with your dad a lot, how is that going"
"It's, um, it's alright," I say. "We've been pretty successful lately so things have been good"
"Alea never told us what your father did, what exactly is it that you guys do?"
"We rob people"
The three of them burst out laughing, obviously thinking that I'm lying, and I wish I were, but that was literally the truth. Their laughter slowly quieted down and they began looking at me, waiting for me to say the real answer and I was praying that a distraction would come.
Mergel saved the day. He stood up to pour himself another mug of Chuvith Ale but dropped the glass bottle and it shattered. Shards of glass and a huge pool of ale soaked through his socks, and he didn't even seem to mind.
"MERGEL!" Vani shouted. She grabbed a mop from the supplies closet and began to wack Mergel with the mop head, soaking his back with dirty water.
Mergel began yelling at Vani and Vani at Mergel. Due to their wind magic, the air in the house itself became chaotic and my hair began swirling around.
"Psst"
I looked around for the source of the sound and saw Alea standing by the front door. She was beckoning me over to the door and in her hand was a glass bottle filled with a crystal clear liquid. She put her finger to her lips, silently telling me to be quiet.
I got up quietly and tiptoed across the room to the door. Alea and I snuck outside and closed the door behind us. The warm air greeted us kindly, the end of august heat was always pleasant for late-night walks.
Alea and I walked down the street silently, the only sound being the ground crunching beneath our feet and a sloshing sound coming from the bottle. I wasn't sure where we were walking, but I decided I didn't care and just followed Alea. As we walked, the belltower rang out eight long notes and we both silently noted the time.
She led us to the city park and onto the play structure. She took a seat and patted the ground next to her and I sat down. She uncorked the bottle and took a long swig, cringing and making a face when she swallowed.
She passed me the bottle and I took a long swig. This wasn't the first time I've had a drink, but I don't know if I'll ever get used to the burning sensation of alcohol.
"Can I ask you something personal?"
"Sure" I replied. "What's up?"
"Have you ever celebrated your birthday before?"
I don't know what I was expecting, but that wasn't it.
"I have not, that was the first time. How did you know?" I ask.
"When you didn't know that you were supposed to blow out the candles, I've never seen that before. Who doesn't know that you're supposed to blow out the candles?" She said.
"Yeah," I say. "Why does that bother you?"
She took another deep swig of alcohol and handed the bottle to me. "I feel like you're emotionally stunted Sorian"
The air suddenly felt heavy again.
She continued. "Your father raised you so poorly that I feel like you don't know what it's like to be actually happy. Truly, without the looming presence of guilt, happy. I can see it every day, you don't know how to feel anything but sadness and it's always worse when your father is brought up"
"Alea-" My heart began to beat faster.
"Does he hurt you, do you get fed?"
"Alea, I appreciate your concern, but I'm okay," I tell her, but she wouldn't listen. My throat started to hurt a dull ache, usually a sign of-.
"Sori. You keep saying that but you're really struggling to convince me. In the last twenty-four hours, I've only seen you smile once, and it looked like it was out of courtesy"
"Alea I am ok"
"No you're not Sorian" Her voice was sturdy like she'd been building up the courage to say this for a long time. "You're trying to convince yourself that you aren't hurting, but I can see it, you're hurting and you've lied to yourself so much that you actually believe it"
My throat ached even more, right on the tip of my Adam's apple. My vision started to blur and my breathing became harsh and sharp, uneven.
"If your father isn't taking care of you properly, just say the word and you can come and live with me," She said. She cupped her hand on the side of my face and turned it to face her. "My parents have already agreed"
I pulled my face away and took another long drink. "Alea really, it's ok"
I knew deep down that it wasn't ok, but I wouldn't dare let anyone pity me. I couldn't stand the thought of my pain being on display for others to see. I don't want anyone to know that I'm hurting, this is something that I have to deal with on my own, I don't want anyone's help.
"Sorian" She cupped her hand to the side of my face and looked me in the eyes. Her emerald-green eyes almost glowed in the dark and I couldn't force myself to run away.
She continued. "I don't want to pressure you to tell me, but I need you to know that if your pain becomes too much to bear on your own, that I am here for you. Always"
She moved her hand to the other side of my face and pulled my face so my head was resting on her shoulder. We sat in silence, periodically passing each other the bottle of alcohol while looking at the dozens of illuminated windows in front of us.
"Thank you, Alea," I say. "For everything"
She rested her head on top of mine. "Of course Sori, you'd do it for me"
A drop of water landed on my now closed eyelid and brought me back to reality. I looked up and noticed that even though it was nighttime, the sky was several shades darker than normal, and no stars were shining.
I felt Alea's head twitch and a few more drops hit my face. I preemptively raised my hand and began to catch every drop of rain with my magic before it reached us. Within a few moments, the rain was coming down like it wanted to turn the city into a lake and the park into an island, but we remained totally dry, the air above us shimmering and the raindrops bouncing right off.
Most people hate the rain, but I feel most comfortable in the rain. Whenever I'm crying, I feel like I'm not alone, like the sky is crying with me.
"Let's go back home, my parents are probably wondering where we are," Alea said and she got up.
I maintained the water shield above us, but that didn't protect us from the stuff that was already wet, not to mention that we were not sober. Water plus alcohol never end well.
I got up with her and we started to climb off the play structure, but both of us struggled to stay upright and stumbled over every couple of steps. Alea skipped the stairs altogether and instead chose to run down the slide.
I giggled to myself and just before she stepped onto the slide, I clenched my fist and the whole surface of the slide was covered in a thin sheet of ice. She put her foot down and immediately both of her feet were up in the air and she went flying, landing right in a puddle at the base of the slope.
"HAHAHA" I couldn't contain myself and a sopping wet Alea stood up and looked mighty unimpressed.
I chose the safer option and carefully climbed down the stairs, but this was definitely not the safer option. A column of air hit me in my left shoulder and knocked me right over the railing and down into a patch of squishy woodchips.
Alea fell onto her knees, grabbing her stomach.
"Bitch…" I muttered under my breath. "That wasn't even funny! Like damn" I shouted.
"Don't get all sulky on me, it was pretty funny"
"I'll show you funny," I say and I walk around the structure so we're facing each other.
I raised my hands and controlled the water that was in her hair and pulled it into two long spikes sticking out just above her ears and then I froze them both. Before she had any idea of what happened, she had two long horns of hair jutting out of the side of her hair.
"I know you didn't just do that"
"Yes I did, what are you gonna do about it?" I taunt. "All bark no bite lookin' ass"
"Sorian Antipas, I will end your whole bloodline"
"Go for it"
She began to move her arms almost like a dance and the wind around us began to swirl, but nothing really happened.
"Is that all you g-"
My feet were lifted off the ground by a wind current and I was held a few feet off the ground. Without warning, it felt like I was hit in the face by an invisible boulder of condensed air and I flipped backwards several times before landing on my stomach and getting winded.
I lay on the ground gasping for air and Alea walked over to me and stood over my body. "All bark no bite?"
"Shut up, you have parents to teach you air wielding, you have the advantage," I say as I push myself up.
"Excuses excuses, just admit I beat you and move on. Also, kindly unfreeze my hair before it breaks off, thanks"
I raised my finger telling her to wait for a second while I got back up onto my feet. I still couldn't breathe properly, but I waved my hand and her hair thawed instantly and fell to her shoulders with a soft plop.
"Are you ready to go home now?" She asked. "Or do you need another minut-"
I cut her off. "Finish that sentence and I'll freeze your face"
She reluctantly stopped talking because she knew I would've done it. I took one more deep breath and determined that my breathing was back to normal. We walked out of the park and down the street, passing dark houses and sloshing with each step, the rain shield I put up keeping us from getting any wetter.
Water ran down the street and dropped off into the sewer grates loudly. When we were only a few houses away from Alea's, I accidentally kicked a soggy newspaper and it skidded a few feet in front of me. I glanced at it as we passed and the headline caught my attention.
"Alea hold up" I bent over and picked it up from the ground. "Could you open it and show me the front page?"
She unfolded it and held it up for me to read. I pulled all the water out of the saturated paper and read the headline.
"Second anniversary of Prince Cassion's disappearance" I read aloud. "Has it already been two years, I could've sworn that he went missing only a few months ago"
"I guess so, do you reckon he's still alive?" Alea asked.
"He was thirteen when he went missing, and no one in that family has magic so I seriously doubt it," I say. "I do hope so, he was so young too"
"This must be a tough day for his family," Alea said.
"I can't even imagine what they must be going through today, I wouldn't be able to handle it. "Do they have another kid, someone to succeed them?"
"I think so. I think I saw somewhere that he has an older brother, but I think he tries to stay out of the spotlight because I don't even know his name, I just know that he exists" I say,
"Oh well, still a shame"
The belltower rang ten times and we realized how long we've been gone.
Alea tossed the newspaper onto the porch of some random house and we continued walking. The adrenaline from our fight earlier was starting to wear off and it was becoming increasingly more difficult to walk straight. My head felt like it weighed a billion pounds and it kept lolling off to the side, pulling the rest of my body with it.
We reached Alea's house and stood on the porch under the roof where I could relax my water shield. It didn't use a lot of magic on its own, but the act of keeping my arm raised for that long certainly didn't feel good.
"Sorian, you look hammered," Alea said.
"I am tho hehe. Why don't you?"
"Cause I'm not a lightweight and I can handle my alcohol unlike you. My parents cannot know that we were drinking so you need to pull yourself together. Can you manage that?
"Why do I need to pull myself together, can't you do it for me? hic," I said, slurring my words a bit. "Hey, why am I not already together? Did I fall apart again?" hic.
"Sorian, if we get caught because of you, may Chuvun have mercy on your soul"
"Do I need to hide my soul?" hic
"Ok I'm gonna try something, prepare yourself and close your eyes"
I did what the mean lady said and closed my eyes and I felt a firm grip on the collar of my shirt. At first, nothing happened, but then a blast of wind hit me smack in the face.
"Are you sober again?"
"Yeah I am," I say and I could feel my brain was clearing up already. "Let's go in, I'm ok now"
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah…" I say and Alea gives me the evil eye. "Yes I am good"
Just before she opened the door, I pulled all the water out of our clothes, drying them out instantly and tossed the water onto the road. Alea pushed open the door and we both strode into the front foyer.
Vani and Mergel were seated on the couch, sipping at some tea, apparently deep in conversation as they didn't even hear us come in. We walked over to them and sat down and only then did they notice our presence.
"Well, where did you two go?" Vani asked, getting right up in Alea's face.
"Calm down mom, we just went for a walk"
"In the pouring rain?" Mergel piped.
"It wasn't raining when we left, but Sorian's water-wielding helped to keep us dry," Alea said.
I smiled while nodding and awkwardly raised my hand and made a thumbs-up.
"Well, if you say so," Vani said and she smirked. "Are you sure you weren't doing anything, just the two of you?"
"MOM" Alea screeched. "Of course not, we just went for a walk, that's all. Don't make this weird, we don't like each other that way"
"Are you sure about that because I don't think Sorian agrees," Mergel said, casually sipping his tea?
It was only at this moment that I realized that my whole face felt like it was on fire and was probably as red as a beetroot. Alea spun around, her long green hair spinning around and she looked at me.
I immediately got defensive. "No no no, it's just really warm in here" I stammered, but I got the impression that no one really believed me. "I don't like Alea, definitely not, nope, not at all"
"Fine, whatever you say," Vani said and she too took a sip of her tea with a certain look on her face. "Just saying, we both think that you would make a good couple"
"MOM" Alea shrieked. "Sorian, I think it's time for you to go so I can have a conversation with my lovely parents"
I rubbed the back of my head nervously and Alea dragged me off by my elbow. "Thank you both for dinner and dessert, today was lovely, thanks!" I called before I was dragged outside and the door slammed behind us.
Alea and I both stood there in silence and listened to the pitter-patter of the raindrops on the cobblestone street.
"So…" I say. "Thank you for today, it was a really good day"
"Do you like me?"
I was not expecting that question at all. "No Alea. I think you're wonderful, but I don't like you that way"
"Ok good, I don't want something like that to ruin our friendship," She said and she pulled me into a tight hug. "Happy Birthday Sorian. I wanted to give you this away from my parents, I hope you like it"
I pulled away and she pulled a small wrapped box with a red box tied neatly on the top out of her pocket and pressed it to my chest. "Alea, you didn't have to-"
"Just open it," She said.
I pulled off the bow first and then carefully pulled off the brown wrapping paper. Inside was a black box, and inside, sitting nicely on a cushion was a necklace with a crystal attached to a piece of metal.
I pulled the necklace out of the box and held it up to the light coming from a lantern on her porch. The crystal was a grey-blue colour and inside were small flecks of red. It was beautiful and part of me wondered how much this set Alea back.
"Alea, this is beautiful, thank you so much" was all I managed to say. I've never gotten a birthday gift before, and I managed to get the prettiest one of them all for my first one.
"Of course Sorian, you deserve to have something nice, I hope you like it". She was literally beaming. I'm so lucky to have someone like her. "Don't ask how much it was because I won't tell you"
"You know me too well," I say, my voice quivering slightly. "Thank you so much, I don't know what I would do without you in my life"
"Ditto. Now get home, I'm sure your father misses you"
Both of us burst into laughter. Trauma jokes, the best kind.
I pulled her into a tight hug and said goodbye. She planted a wet kiss on my cheek and head inside. I walked out into the rain, protecting myself with a shield and I walked home. As I walked, my eyes began to water and my throat began to hurt, the telltale signs of an incoming cry session.
I took a deep breath and tried to suppress it, but it was too pent up, and after being edged earlier, it was very close to the surface. I got home and opened the front door to an empty and dark house.
'He's not even home, figures'
I dragged myself into my room where I closed the door just before my knees gave out and I slid down the door onto the ground. It felt like my heart was gone. Like I was unable to feel any happiness at all, like that part of me, was ripped out long ago.
The tears just began to flow, streaming down my face and dripping off my chin and into my lap. I'm not a particularly loud crier, but this one has been a long time coming and everything was coming out all at once. I ran to my bed and pressed my face as hard as I could into my pillow and let out a muffled scream, unlike any other sound I have ever made.
My whole body shook and I collapsed into my thin blanket, my pillow gradually being soaked from the tears. My nose clogged up completely and my throat felt raw and scraped. I lay there in silence, the lack of sound ringing in my ears and I slowly began to drift off.
Today was the best day of my entire life, so why did it hurt this much? Why did being happy make me feel so guilty?