February 20, 2020.
The final buzzer sounded to end the game. The score was 48-54, and we'd barely lost. Including the loss yesterday and the one on Valentine's Day, that made three in a row, which was really hurting out chances of making the playoffs. I didn't even know what we were doing wrong, either. I didn't have an problems with anyone I was on the court with, especially since I had made up with Cam, Nathan, and Max. The only person on the team that I did have a problem with was Chance, and we were never on the court together. So what was going wrong?
On the bright side of the week, things with me and Harper were going great. It wasn't official or anything and we hadn't told anyone, but we had been hanging out and talking a alot, both in person and through FaceTime. I didn't know why I hadn't told anyone yet, because I really did like her. I guess I just didn't want to deal with the drama. Plus, I wanted to see if it would last.
"We just have to win Monday's game," Wesley said after the game. "As long as we win that one and the next, we'll be in the playoffs. If we lose either one, though, we're out for the season."
"Hey."
I turned around to see Coach Hendrix standing behind us. He looked at Wesley and then to me.
"A word, Blake?" he said.
"Oh, sure," I replied, and I followed him across the court.
"What is it?" I asked him when we stopped.
"I just wanted to ask you about your performance," Hendrix said, frowning. "You're not doing bad or anything, but I have noticed a shift in the past couple of games."
"My performance is declining?"
"You've just seemed a little... distracted," the coach said. "I just wanted to know if it's something at home, or with the lineup you're in..."
"No!" I said quickly. "No, it's nothing like that. Don't worry Coach, I'll fix it. I'll be in top shape in practice tomorrow and Monday's game."
"Great," said Hendrix. "That's all I needed to hear."
He clapped me on the back and I walked back over to Wesley.
"What'd he say to you?" asked Wesley as we walked over to the concession table.
"Basically that I need to step my game up for Monday," I replied as Wesley fished his pockets for change.
Wesley handed the guy behind the table a crumpled up dollar he'd found and came away with a candy bar. "That's crazy. It wasn't your fault we lost the game."
"Ah, maybe he's right," I said. "I should be giving the team more of my attention. I am a starter, after all."
Wesley just shrugged and followed me as I headed toward the locker room. "So, what're your plans?"
I unlocked my locker and grabbed my bag, slinging it around my shoulder. "I gotta get home so my dad doesn't get all suspicious again. Then I'll spend some time on homework and maybe get some practice time in."
"I can join you if you'd like."
"Thanks, but I need to do it on my own," I told him. "Anyway, I'm off."
"Alright, see you tomorrow."
An hour later I laid on my back, trying to get the new vocabulary into my head for English class tomorrow. After going through all the words on the list twice, I decided to switch gears and work on memorizing the new plays the coach had emailed me. There were two games left until the playoffs, and so we weren't really focusing on new plays as much as switching around the old ones for teams we'd already played. We were now facing teams we'd already faced, and they'd already know our previously plays and so we just needed to change them around enough to keep them on their toes.
I heard the doorbell ring a minute or two later, but I heard my dad go to get it so I stayed put. A couple seconds later, though, he peered into my room.
"It's for you, son," he said.
"Who is it?" I asked.
My dad just shrugged his shoulders. "Never seen 'em before, must be one of your school friends."
I nodded and stood up. I made my way downstairs and opened the front door wider to see Harper standing there.
"Hi..." I said, a little taken aback. "What's going on? Are you okay?"
"What—oh, yeah I'm fine," Harper replied. "I just came here to see if you wanted to hang out or something."
I hesitated before responding. "Look, I really would like to, but I'm studying plays and I'm about to head to the neighborhood court to practice."
Harper frowned. "There's not a game tomorrow, is there?"
"Well, no," I replied, "but I really need to prepare. We have to win both of the upcoming games to make it to the playoffs."
"Ookay then," Harper said. "I'll come with you to the court."
I let out a sigh. "Look it's like my coach told me, I can't be distra—"
"Oh!" Harper stepped back, her eyebrows shooting up. "So that's all I am now!? A distraction?"
"You know I didn't mean it like—"
"And I thought I had finally found someone who... you know what, nevermind!" Harper turned and stormed down our driveway and into the car of whoever had driven her. I tried to see who was driving, because it didn't look like an adult, but I couldn't make out anything else.
As the car drove away, I stood there looking out at the spot where Harper was. After a moment, I decided to close the door. When I turned, I noticed my dad standing there watching me. How long had he been there? Had he heard the part about basketball?
But all he said was, "Girl problems?"
"Something like that," I said.
"Wanna talk about it?" he asked.
"No," I replied shortly.
My dad frowned slightly, but he didn't look surprised. "And why is that, son?"
"Because you don't get to chose when you can be a part of my life!" I said firmly. "You're not interested in anything I've done the whole year, you told me that I couldn't do something that I really love doing, we haven't talked in the weeks since then, and now you suddenly want me to open up to you? That's not how it works."
I turned to go back upstairs, but my dad grabbed my arm before I could. I tried to pull away, but his grasp was too strong. I tried pushing against him, but he barely budged. He was a big guy, after all.
"You're right, son. I haven't exactly been there for you and I haven't exactly been supportive, but I'm working on it, okay? I want you to be able to talk to me."
He released me and I stepped back, shaking my head. "Don't worry about me, okay? If you feel like caring, talk to Liv. Be there for her before she finds someone or something else to lean on, like I did. Be there for her now, so you don't lose her forever."
I stared at my father for a moment more to give him the effect of my words before running up to my room, grabbing my basketball, my bag, and my beats and exiting the house.
On my jog to the street court, my music suddenly stops and instead my ears filled with the sound of FaceTime ringing. I unpocketed my phone to see Austin's name. I accepted the call.
"Hey Blake," Austin said over the call. "I was wondering if you wanted to get on and play... wait, where are you?"
"On my way to the street court," I replied, continuing to run there.
"Oh, well in that case I can come meet you—"
"No!" I said quickly. "I can't have distractions. I need to practice alone."
"Oh, okay," Austin said. "What about after?"
"Look, Austin," I decreased my speed and glanced down at my phone. "I really need to focus on the upcoming games I have. I'm sorry, I gotta go."
I ended the call as my music and my run resumed. I made it to the street court in a minute or two more of running, but my heart sank when I noticed who was there. It Nathan, Cam, and Max.
"Hey," Max greeted walking up to me.
"What are the odds?" Cam asked as he and Nathan came up too.
"What are you guys doing here?" I asked them.
"We're practicing," Nathan said. "Care to join?"
"You guys literally never come here, unless..." I groaned. "Did Wesley say something to one of you?"
"Whaat?" Cam asked guiltily.
"That's ridiculous," Nathan said.
"Yeah, we would never—"
"Guys, stop," I interrupted. "I appreciate the thought or whatever, alright? But I need to practice alone. I have to get my game up for the coach by Monday. And for the team, too. I can't be a starter scoring an average of 7 points a game. I've got to get better. I can't stop you guys from practicing here, but I'm here to practice alone, okay?"
"Sure, whatever," Nathan said. "But just be careful. Don't forget about everything else you have."
I watched as Nathan, Cam, and Max went over to the other side of the court. "Don't forget about everything else you have." What did he mean by that? I hesitated for a minute, thinking about that, before taking to my side of the court and getting started.
I went through everything. I started with my shooting, doing some close-up shots before moving to practicing three pointers. Despite doing much better now than I did at the beginning of the season, I still hadn't scored a three pointer in an actual game. It wasn't really because I couldn't make them, either, because I could. It was more that I was just scared of missing one. Like I'd air ball it and suddenly retract to the way I was at the beginning of the season. So for some reason I had stuck to layups and jump shots for the entire season. And I wasn't sure if I could change that or not.
After doing an hour's worth of shooting drills, I started my workouts. I did pushups, situps, burpees, and planks. I would stop for a thirty second rest break every set I did, and then continue them. Eventually I looked over to see that Nathan and the others had left, so I started running laps around the court. I then did some suicides before going back to basketball and doing some dribbling and ball handling drills to give my body a rest. I went back to shooting and then workouts again. I gave it 200 percent and I felt all my emotions coming out as I pushed myself and pushed myself.
When I finished the sky was dark. My shirt was soaking wet and my skin was damp with sweat glands. I let out a shuddering breath as I ran a hand through my damp hair and collapsed on the bench. I gave myself several minutes to catch my breath before getting up and walking home with great difficulty. I had been going hard for hours, and for some reason I had only shut down when I stopped.
I finally made it home and when I opened the door and fell through, my dad was sitting in his chair watching TV. When I got in the house, he looked up.
"Where've you been?" he asked me.
I sat down at the foot of the steps and faced him. "Just practicing."
"Really?" he said, tilting his head slightly. "Practicing or blowing off steam."
I shrugged. "Maybe a little of both."
My dad nodded and turned back to the TV. "I don't want you out this late again."
"Dad—"
"No, I mean it," he interrupted. "I don't care how much or little I've been there recently. I'm here now, I'm you father, and I don't want you out playing on some outdoor court until nearly midnight. Is that clear?"
I had to suppress a smile. I don't know exactly why, but it felt kind of nice to have him caring about what I was doing again. I nodded to him and in that moment I felt an understanding pass between us. He would accept my terms and try his best to be there for me and Liv, but I had to meet him halfway and accept some of his terms too.
"Yes sir."