"There are pages of Life that you wish you could live again… and those you wish you never lived."
December 18, 1908
Friday
HollyDale
Obed saw his sister tired and asleep next to Charity, who had suffered a great deal, running a high temperature since last night. He didn't want to wake either of them up, for it was late when they had fallen asleep.
He walked out of the room, almost dashing into Allen. "Easy there, little guy", he smiled, making Obed wonder how he could wear such a pleasant expression when the house was as gloomy as a grey cloud. It had been snowing since before the break of day and the rising chill refused to cease.
"Will you be going out?" he asked, looking up. He watched his brother lean forward to prop his hands against his knees. "I plan to stay by momma till she recovers", he said, ruffling Obed's hair. Beyond the fact that Allen had combed his little brother's hair that morning in the 'lush ocean waves' style, he was also the one that had tousled it enough several times, till it looked like an erupting volcano.
Something about Allen's airs, though, seemed to change into a serious expression when he wasn't around his siblings. It was evident that Charity's state of illness was weighing down on him.
"May I stay home as well?" Obed asked, turning to see Allen sit beside sleeping Charity. "That would be wonderful", he replied, giving the dark-haired boy a warm smile. Talking to his big brother always made Obed feel independent, like he was a man that made his own decisions.
Any other that he had consulted would talk to him as a child taking orders; but even with all the ways Allen treated him like a baby-brother, their conversations consisted of a degree of respect, like Obed was making his decisions, in consultation.
He walked over, seeing Merry wake up looking disoriented, as she did at most parts of the day. Obed crossed his arms against his chest and leaned against a wall, waiting for Allen to test their mother's temperature.
Merry gathered all the might tresses of her chestnut hair and trussed them into a messy bun, asking her brother, "How is mamma?" Allen didn't look too happy when he withdrew his hand. "She needs rest", he said, resting elbows against his lap.
"Breakfast?" Obed asked his sister, who turned to shake her head 'no'. The designs that would be forged at the wake of some talented ice-skater upon a frozen rink were etched against her temples, by loose strands of hair.
Merry rose to her feet and walked away to freshen herself up and look presentable. Obed sat at the edge of the bed where Charity was sleeping, her face creased with lines of strain like she was suffering. "The physician is out of town until the town ball", he told his brother, to which Allen mutely nodded like he was in deep contemplation.
"Would you be alright if I ask Aaron to take the twins with him for the day?" he asked Obed, to which the boy agreed. "It would be hard if they fall ill."
"What of Claire?" Obed asked and Allen turned to look him in the eye, "I would prefer she was under our care." The child nodded. He had thought his brother was over-protective when they were much younger, before Allen had moved to Frostshire, but now, with Claire in the house and Obed growing older, he could understand reason behind rash decisions at keeping his sister.
A version of that had become his fear for having Merry married away. He did not know how kind Christian could be, for his sister was far too deep in the game of love and care.
~
Merry pulled the scarf around her head closer, shivering against the cold descent of freezing snow. She thought about how her visions had started becoming odd. Every time she locked eyes, their past no longer spread around her as difficultly as before, but she began seeing flashes of various scenes, sometimes faintly. She walked as fast as she could, until she had reached the doorstep at the Library. A part of her mind wandered to wonder if Christian was there, before she stepped in.
Greeting Ladye, she set her belongings down before leaning close. "I am thankful for the break you lent me yesterday", Merry began, with a smile. "There's nothing there for you to be grateful for, my dear", the lady said, brushing it away. The young damsel nodded and licked her lips to begin: "Mamma is ailing and I was wondering if I could return home by the afternoon to look after her."
She felt guilty for forcing her leave for absence, but her concern for Charity was far greater. Brows arched in worry, Ladye leaned close, "My dear girl, you are free to leave as you please. I will have Christian visit as early as possible."
"Ah there won't be need", Merry said, waving a hand. "The Merritts had invited him to visit, so he needed to be there this morning", she said, arranging a few books into shelves. "I see", she replied, keeping the longing out of her voice.
Considering the matter, Merry was sure the Merritts needed his visit to amend with him for Bianca's recoil that Christian had mentioned of, the previous night. She could not place why the family pursued his favour, but it did not settle well with her.
The thought of her 'lack of past' was another great burden she needed to shoulder, as opposed to Bianca who had no shadow of uncertainty for where she belonged to.
Just then, the bell at the door sounded and Merry turned to find old Sir Quinn enter, with three books in tow. A cordial smile and a nod were granted before Merry stood behind the counter to begin her job.
~
Merry stepped outside, thanking Ladye for granting her leave. Hurrying down the streets, her first intention was to reach home before the snowfall turned into a blizzard. She hadn't seen Christian all day, much to her disappointment. Her mind, however, had no time to dwell on that, for she hoped Charity had recovered at least a bit.
Claire received the door and her heart felt a tug of sadness knowing her brothers still needed to look after their mother. Giving her little sister a hug, Merry walked inside to change her clothes.
The bloodshot-haired damsel walked in to find Obed and Allen sitting by Charity, looking solemn. Merry didn't say a word, before opening her closet to find clothes. After brushing herself and changing into the warm attire, she decided to make her brothers hot chocolate, to have them feel better.
The boys seemed to have left the room, so she walked outside, fastening the buttons of her coat. Merry, then, looked up to see that Allen had received the door for Christian, who looked agitated unlike ever before. She noticed an envelope in his hand, which seemed to have been torn open.
Hoping nothing was amiss, the damsel walked in, a pleasant smile on her face. Allen looked equally disturbed, when Merry passed by barely noticed. While they conversed, looking distressed, she wondered what it was about, while brewing them a drink.
Stepping out of the kitchen, she saw them seated at the table. The gents turned and the frustration on Christian's face was replaced by a smile. "Thank you, my dear", said he, as she placed the cup before him. A rush of warmth touched her cheeks as she nodded, setting her brother's cup by his side, seeing his brows troubled whilst he read the letter.
Obed walked in, just in time to receive his own mug of hot chocolate, before he left to buy necessities for Charity. "It's snowing heavily, Obed, should you, perhaps, wait for it to clear?" asked she, his empty mug in hand, while the boy put his boots on.
"What if it grows worse?" he said, giving her a raise of an eyebrow, before tying his scarf securely around his neck. Merry saw her brother walk out into the growing frost and prayed he'd be safe.
Standing there for as long as she could see his fading silhouette, the lovely damsel closed the door and turned to see the men: Christian with his ankle rested against a knee, one hand pocketed and the other massaging his temples, head thrown back, his black mane ungroomed for once; Allen had a fist against his mouth, ample turbulence in his eyes. They each leaned forward to discuss before walking upstairs to meet Charity.
After about a half hour's worth of spending time with the elder woman, Merry watched as Christian rose to take his leave. "A moment with you, m'lady?" he asked, taking her hand in his. Walking downstairs, he turned to face her, a rather serious expression on his face. "I have received grave news from Alex and I plan to leave town this evening to pay him a visit", said he.
Shock seized her reins with a void constricting her heart. "What happened?" she stammered, digesting this information. "It isn't to be worried of, but it does require my urgent presence. I will return at the earliest convenience. It was needful for me to have my bride know", he smiled.
"I will await your travel back, and pray for Alexander's recovery", she said, a confident expression on her face. His fingers reached to brush a lock of hair behind her ear, before she looked up into the depths of his eyes.
There were flashes: of a man with wine-coloured hair and basil eyes, begging for sympathy at the courtroom of the House of Lords and the man whom she had seen as Christian's father stand unremorseful; the man from the court behind bars, screaming hypocrisy; documents strewed across a table and finally, the man taking his final breath on a bed, But in all these flashes, there was one name that resonated
Merry gasped for a moment, wrenching away from his grasp. "Who is Blaize Hill?"
Christian looked confused, searching her eyes, "I don't presume I know", said he. She could not believe the terrible things she saw. Was he pretending to be as kind as he seemed? And more importantly, who was Blaize Hill and why did the man bear such a striking semblance to her?
Was he someone who had known her? Obed's words of whether to trust Christian fogged her mind. Had he only saved Nate from the fire because she was his sister? Was he truly a man who would not have done so for any other, but would rather be cold?
"N-Nate was in the fire, and you saved her?" Merry asked, her heart hammering, like she was the victim of some ulterior goal. "My sister has never seen a fire as consuming", he said, confusion evident in his eyes.
Merry pursed her lips, heaving hard. There were too many thoughts on her mind, but trusting Christian was beyond her agenda. "Merry, what seems to be the matter?" she heard him ask, before a deluge of crippling conceptions began ruling her mind.
Taking another step back, the perplexed young lady shook her head, distraught, and hastened to the room, tears threatening to fall. She did not know why her emotions had begun to be as chaotic, she knew she needed to calm, but this was no time to be as even-tempered. Not after she had just seen the death of a man who looked exactly like her.
~
The snow was ruthless, boasting its ferocity against every passing human, the wind joining hands to serve a grand uproar. Obed walked through the town's street, knowing that he may need to withdraw into a refuge till it was safer to proceed.
The bakery came within eyeshot and the boy made his way over, to take shelter beneath the awning thereof. He stood there, before the glass of the bread-place's window, watching the cupcakes he had always liked. It had taken so terribly long and Obed had barely suspected the weather to yield such a frightful blow, escalating greatly with time.
A few moments passed, before he saw a man in a large trench-coat approach through the coursing winds. It took a minute for the boy to recognise Christian, for the dark-eyed gentleman did not seem to wear the calm he always had. His airs seemed to match the tempestuous weather for he looked troubled and deep in thought.
Obed wanted to greet him, for he hadn't had the circumstance to do so before he had left the house, but seeing the man looking far more agitated than he had been when he first arrived home, the boy chose to wait. He pulled his collars close to his face, before the side of his eye caught sight of the man making his way to the door of the bakery.
"Care to join?" asked Christian, with a smile. Obed gave the man a nod before following him indoors. "What of these are to your preference?" the gentleman asked, removing his trench-coat. "Oh, I wouldn't say I have need for delicacies", he replied modestly, wondering why the man had asked him to join.
"Is that so?" Christian smiled, throwing the elaborate coat over his forearm. "A tray's worth of blueberry-glazed cupcakes, please", he asked Mr. Baker, an arm rested on the counter. Obed walked close to his brother-in-law to be, turning his gaze to watch the proprietor of the place fulfil the request.
"What do you siblings relish?" he asked looking down at the boy. Had he noticed that those cupcakes were his favourite? Nobody, save his sister, had known of it. Obed looked down at his snow-flavoured boots, eyes glazed. So he truly was a caring man. Merry would be happily wedded, with a man as him.
~
Allen twisted a wet cloth and placed it over Charity's forehead, while Merry gave her a hot beverage. Her mother had begun recovering slowly, and they hoped for her improvement to remain consistent.
Shortly after, Obed had arrived, an array of various delicacies in his possession. "Christian and I were stuck in the storm and he bought us all of these!" he said, excitement vivid in his voice. The faint mist of uncertainty, that had been clouding his heart ever since the betrothal's declaration, seemed to have cleared.
Merry could not contain the guilt that tore her within. She had an apology to render.