September 15th, 1987
Akira Shinjuku was practicing martial arts, when suddenly, a realization came to him: the name of his team... FUCKING SUCKS.
"Ass-Kicker 5....the fuck were you thinking, Silas?!" He shouts out loud. "Hey man, I was inspired by a JoJo YouTuber ;-;" I say as Akira scoffs. "You fucking think of a better name then!" I shout as Akira grins, his sharp teeth forming. "Oh, I already have.....Hehehehehehehehehe!!!!"
"Thank you all for coming." Akira said as Maria was lighting her bong, Josefumi was thinking about cartoons, Rei was smoking a cigarette, and Amanda was reading 'Mrs. Tits Monthly'....fuckin pervert. She looks up, saying "What did you say?" I sweatdrop. "...nothing." Amanda smirks and says "Yeah, that's what I thought, Mask-Boy. You know what your main character and I do behind the scenes! >:}"
Akira had a shadow over his eyes, as he shouts "PAY ATTENTION!!! " As everyone snaps to Akira. "Now then, it's come to my attention that the Ass-Kicker 5 is the worst fucking team name I've ever heard." Josefumi then raised his hand. "But you're the one who came up with it.....?" Akira looks at his adoptive brother, and says "No, that would be our author." The rest of the team, minus Amanda, look confused as hell. "Author...?" Amanda looks to her black and red haired leader/boyfriend, and says "Please tell me you came up with a better name." Akira looks to his black and blue haired right hand woman/girlfriend, and smirks. "Oh, you bet, Mandy. From this half chapter onwards, we are....." He pulls down a sheet, revealing a board with the words 'Guardians of The Graveyard' on it.
"Oooooh!" Josefumi and Maria said, while Rei scoffs. "Guardians of The Graveyard? You couldn't think of anything dumber, Shinjuku?" Akira glares at him. "Do you have a better one, Ronin?" He grits, referring to him by his codename. "Rei and The Dingleberries." Rei said smugly. Akira and the others looked at him, and Akira said "Mandy, shoot to kill." She nods and says, "Will do, Aki." She then points her pistol at Rei, and blew his fucking head off.
"So, all in favor of being called the Guardians of The Graveyard?" Akira smiles. Everyone who could raised their hands smiling. "Alrighty, it's settled!"
Akira and Amanda went to the Bureau of Paranormal Extermination, and let Director Helsing know of the new team name. "Finally, a decent team name for you idiots." Helsing had a cigar in his mouth, as Akira looked offended. "Idiots? Listen here, Director! Mandy here has a genius level intellect! If anyone in my team is smart, it's her!" He growls at his boss. Adam just sighs. "Whatever, kid..." He rolls his eyes as he walks away. Amanda smiles at her boyfriend. "Thanks, babe." She kisses his cheek. Akira smiles back, saying "I gotchu, my Little Dark Age!" He kisses her forehead. "Now, for plot convenience, I'm gonna go pick Connor up from school."
Later, Akira was in his study, pouring himself a glass of Coca-Cola. He was not alone, however, as he was accompanied by a shadowy woman with pointy white teeth formed in a grin and sporting long, spikey purple hair, who he was also pouring a glass of Jack Daniel's Whiskey.
"Your team.... what's it called again?" She asked. Akira smiles. "The Guardian's of The Graveyard!" The woman chuckles. "Oof, who came up with that shit?" She said, as Akira frowns. "Relax, bud. I'm just teasing!" She ruffled his hair. She was wearing a black turtleneck with a grey scarf, black slacks, combat boots, and an open black trenchcoat. She also had blood red-lensed glasses, which hide her white eyes. Akira chuckles, and they have a toast to celebrate the new team name, chugging their drinks. "It's good to see you by the way, Sensei." He smiles warmly. She smiles back, saying "It's always a treat to see you too, Mr. World's Greatest Paranormal Investigator!" He chuckles, asking "Sensei, you know you held that mantle first, right?" She looks at him, smiling. "Yeah, but you've more than earned that mantle, kiddo." She hugs him tightly, as he returns the hug, the two finally bidding farewell. "Take care, Akira." She said warmly. "You too....Madame Nightmare." He says, as Madame Nightmare grins, laughing as she turns to mist and leaves out the open window.
Akira smiles, looking to the audience. "That, viewers at home, was indeed my mentor." He said to you, the viewer's at home. "Anyways, this half chapter was to hold you guys over and introduce my mentor. Chapter 12: Death of a Bachelor is being written after this one! Take care, readers at home, and remember, Manners Maketh Man."
"Oh, also, let me tell you how Footloose works. You see, the way Footloose works is-"