Alex Cooper - 12 - Kansas
"Mom?" I tug her dress and watch as she talks to a man.
The man looks like dad, but with... less hair and more rounded. He smiled at me earlier, I guess he's a nice guy, he even gave me a piece of peppermint!
My mom nods and ruffles my hair, making me pout, I told her I didn't like it when she did that... it's embarrassing.
"Let's go, kid." The man holds out his hand to me and I look to mom and she smiles at me meekly.
I guess it's okay to follow him if mom says so, I take his hand and he leads me outside, I wave to mom who stands by the door.
"Where are we going, mister?" I look to the man leading me, his hand is so big, mine is tiny though.
He shrugs and says, "We're just going somewhere fun."
I giggle excitedly, "I hope we're back by dinnertime, Charlie said he'd be coming over for a sleepover!!"
The man chuckles gravelly, his deep voice sends shivers through me.
"I kinda think he's cute, but don't tell him that." I press a finger against my mouth in a shhh manner so mom doesn't hear.
"Well, we'll make sure you get to your boyfriend in time." He pats my head and I turn my face away to hide my red cheeks.
"H-He's not my boyfrie—!" I freeze up when I see her, "M-Mom?"
She's lying on our porch, her head pressed against the wooden floor, she's not moving.
She's not moving.
"Sh-She's not moving."
"Ah.. shit, I didn't think it'd happen this quick." The man mutters, he probably thinks I didn't hear him... just what does he mean?
"M-Mom?" I call out to her, but she doesn't answer.
She's probably just trying to scare me again, right?
Sometimes she pretends that she's gonna leave me when I'm bad. That's it, I just did something very bad, and she's trying to scare me to be better.
"M-Mom, stop joking around... I know you're just fake dying, I'm sorry for what I did." I try to walk to her, but the man doesn't let me go, instead, he just holds me tighter.
My eyes widen as I finally notice something coming from her mouth, it's red and shiny, no... no!
"M-MOM!" I scream and try to shake the man's grip off me.
He pulls me along, and I keep trying to run towards her but he won't let me. There's a pool of red around her head now, my eyes give out and I start crying.
"M-Mister!! P-Please, help my mom." I sob out to him, placing my other hand on his arm but he won't even look at me.
I can't just let mom disappear! I have to- I have to help her!
I didn't even realise it until the man started screaming in pain... I found myself sinking my teeth on his arm, but he still wouldn't budge.
I bite down as hard as I can on his arm, and he finally shakes me off, letting go of my arm.
I rush to my mom's body, and crawl to her face, the red stuff getting all over my pants and body, but I don't care right now, all that matters is mom!
"M-Mom... y-you... you're just trying to teach me a lesson again, a-aren't you?" I cup her cheeks in my hands and choke on my words a bit.
My nose scrunches up as the smell of the red stuff gets to me, my hands bright crimson as I shake her.
"M-Mom... p-please wake up! I-I've learned my lesson! P-Please!"
I scream desperately and keep shaking her, the red stuff becoming sticky on my hands. My vision's blurry, everything's crimson, I almost can't see anything.
I open my mouth to scream again, but it gets covered by some sort of cloth, and it just comes out as a muffled mess.
"Good night, kid." I hear the man's voice again.
And just like that, I drift off into a void of blood, my eyes shutting completely.
~~~
(Trigger Warning)
I wake up with a dull pain on my arm, and my eyes stinging.
I try to shake off the tired feeling and touch my aching arm, that man must've bruised me earlier when he pulled me. I open my eyes, but all I see is pitch black darkness and a flickering candle.
I groan loudly and push myself into a sitting position. I wince as I feel the cold floor touch my butt.
Wait— I'm naked!
My clothes are gone, and the red stuff that I had on me is gone too, instead, there's something heavy on my neck.
Mom must be looking for me, she must be pretty worr—
"M-Mom?" I cry out weakly, remembering what happened. I feel goosebumps run up my spine.
She was lying on the floor, everything dripping beet red, she wouldn't wake up... and then.. and then...
"Some bastard knocked you out, right?" A low pitched voice says, and my head instantly turns to where it came from.
When my eyes finally adjust, I see a very bare-skinned man in front of me, making me instinctively flinch.
He looks a bit younger than mom, he looked nothing like the man that I saw before, instead, he's more average and less rounded looking, there are dark circles around his eyes, he had the hair thing on his chin like Jafar, and his hair looks like it's about to turn King Candy.
My hands immediately go to cover up my shame, a bright red blush covering my face.
I promised mom I'd only show myself to someone I really like, and this person is someone I really don't think I'm going to like.
"The name's Laurence, kid." His voice is smooth, and he gives me a charming smile, making me feel uneasy.
He has something around his neck too, it looks like a silver collar for a dog. He stands up, his tall figure towering way above me, and his penis dangling about, it's length intimidating me.
"AAH—," as I scream I feel something constrict my neck, as if I'm being choked, making me cough and wheeze.
I collapse to the floor as the pain overtakes my entire body, my eyes tearing up as I do, "No use trying to scream for help, these things are gonna cut the life out of you if you try to do that more."
I raise my head from the ground and glance to where he stood before, but he isn't there anymore, instead, he's right next to me.
His thing is right in front of my face after I sit back up, my nose crinkling at the putrid smell it produces.
I try to move away from him, but my back is against the wall, and my eyes widen even more as he comes closer and closer to me.
"You know, as long as we're here, might as well get some relief." He gives me a toothy grin, which somehow makes him creepier.
"R-Relief? Wh-Wha—!" I'm interrupted by something being forcefully shoved into my mouth.
It gets pushed to the back of my throat, causing me to gag and tear up, my mouth's open so much that it hurts, and my nose is right against something bush-like that smells awful.
"Bite me and I'll make sure you won't be able to move ever again."
He pushed himself deep in my mouth, then pulls out for a second and tams it back into me.
My throat is burning, and I'm sure the taste will never leave my mouth, this burning sensation makes me want to shrivel up, hug my knees, and cry.
He makes weird sounds as he does, which freaks me out even more, he uses his left hand to grab my hair and force me to let his thing go deeper in my mouth, his stinky bush is the only thing I can smell.
With all the strength I have, I try to push him away from me, but he's too strong, he keeps pushing himself in and out of my mouth, each time making me hope that he'll stop, but each time I find him doing it again.
"Fuck..."
Then he pulls my head to take in everything again, but this time it pulsated then he made a really gross sound.
And then...
And then...
A disgusting bitter/salty taste filled my mouth, making me want to vomit even more. It's all the way down my throat, so I'm forced to swallow the disgusting liquid.
He pulls himself out of my mouth, I look up at him, my jaw hurting really badly, and he grins widely at me.
"Look at you, such a pretty face." He bends down, cups my cheek at wipes away my tears.
I'm shivering. Why is he doing this to me?
"Wh-Why are you h-hurting me?" I croak out, my voice breaking.
His smile instantly turns into a scowl, making me cower in fear.
Then a jolt of pain hits my body, the pain I felt increasing by a hundred.
He kicked me.
His kick sent me flying, hitting my back against the wall, causing a loud cracking sound, then I fell to the ground, my whole body screaming in agony.
I'm on the ground, groaning and shaking, my cheek resting on the floor.
"U-Ugh... p-please s-stop," I beg, my eyes are probably puffy from all the crying.
Then he placed his foot on the side of my head.
My head aches painfully as he continues to put more weight on his foot.
"How'd you like that? Feels great doesn't it?"
I'm too scared to answer him, so instead, I just stay there shivering.
"No answer, eh? Fine."
He moves his foot from my head and says, "Get on all fours and bend over."
I can't disobey him now, he might actually crush me if I don't. Even though everything hurts, I force myself to move from my spot, and get on my hands and knees, struggling to stay up from all my shivering.
"Good."
I feel something press against my butthole, what is he trying to do?
My butt feels like it's being torn open, causing me to gasp as I feel something trying to force itself in.
"I-It hurts— p-please stop!" I beg, my spit going everywhere and my eyes burning.
Then a sharp pain shoots through my entire body causing me to scream, "A-AHHH—!"
I let out coughs and gasps, my hand reaching for my neck, it strangles me more and more, causing me to go crazy desperate for air.
At the same time, I feel endlessly excruciating pain and feel something drip out... it's probably the red stuff again.
I get to breathe again and he didn't notice I'm bleeding, and he shoves his whole self inside my butt causing me to go crazy.
Everything's spinning.
The world is upside down.
My jaw hurts, my butt is bleeding, my eyes are stinging, my stomach and cheek are aching from his kicks.
I feel dizzy, the darkness is spreading all around me...
Why is this happening to me?
Is this my punishment?
"H-Help..."
mom where are you?
i'm sorry, i'll be good— i promise!
i'll do better in school!!
i-i~
...
i-i wont look at charlie anymore
i was lying when i said i liked charlie, i actually like his sister!
p-please? im sorry!
m-mom?
m o m ?
Shira Yoh - 26 - New Jersey
"Like, excuse the fuck you? What the hell are you trying to do?"
I thought my life was decent at the least, I live alone, working as the manager of a local coffee shop, knowing how to deal with Karens, having hookups now and again.
But this, I never thought this would happen.
I was having dinner alone at my apartment when a bunch of Chads bust through the front door and started yelling for me to get down.
I just did as told and one of the sketchy guys in grey pulled me by the hair and told me to get up.
"Oh sorry, CHAD! I didn't mean to do what you want!" Is what I would've said if I wanted to die.
Instead, I do what they told me to do— stand up, sigh and raised my hands. A guy grabs my arm tightly, and I don't do shit to resist.
Is this my karma for kicking the old lady out of the coffee shop for molesting Bryam?
Prolly not, Bryam did thank me for that.
(Yes it's Bryam with an m)
"Strip her." What the fuck did he just say?
The creeps chuckle to themselves, clearly, they're ugly bastards under those masks.
Fucking hell, fuck no! I'm not gonna get naked for a bunch of hairy fatass old men with skinny dicks!
With all the strength I have left after a hard day's work of sitting on a chair and watching Binging with Babish, I elbow the guy who was holding my arm hostage, my dad's wrestling obsession helped me for once.
I wish I can say that I took out an army knife and started stabbing all of them right there, or socked them right in their ugly-ass ass-faces.
Instead of being cool like that, I knee the guy who looked like the leader right where the sun don't shine, or if he has one that is, he was never gonna have children anyway, especially with that face, even though I couldn't see it, I can tell.
Then while the Chads crowd over the big one, I grab a Swiss navy knife on my countertop, yes that's normal, then I smash the window and jump the fuck out of there.
I land on the fire escape stairs, making me wince in pain. Forcing myself up, I run down the stairs, pumped by adrenaline, I scream at the top of my lungs as I run.
I can feel my sweat dripping, I feel breathless, yet I know that if I look up the Chad Squad would probably be close.
When I get down to the second floor, I decide that jumping would be faster, so I land in the dumpster like a spy in an overrated movie.
Fortunately, the trash is soft and it broke my fall.
Unfortunately, the trash is soft, and I tore the plastic when I landed.
It isn't a mattress, it's just two garbage bags full of diapers.
Shit.
I curse, get up, and I hear Chad no. 5's voice, "GET HER! SHE'S IN THE SHIT!"
'In the shit'? What are they smoking?
I haul myself out of the dumpster and land ass first on the rough cement floor. I stand up and break into a sprint towards the main road, kind of dragging myself because of the fall.
I'm in the middle of the road, speechless. It's completely deserted as if cars don't exist.
"Fuck my life."
I keep looking around and yet none of the buildings have any lights on, mind you it was just about dusk, but still, we all know motherfuckers who like to waste energy by turning on the lights when it's still 2 in the afternoon.
But that doesn't matter right now, what matters is that I get away from these crazy mofos.
I turn a corner as soon as I could, still following the road, better to stay on the main road, they're probably expecting me to go into an alleyway or the sewers, but that's dumb as shit. Why the hell would I allow them to trap me in a corner?
There are still no cars around me, and I'm seriously getting frustrated, first of all, I can't go to the police because they'd just shut me down, secondly, I can't stop to use my phone because they might be right behind me— so basically I have to run.
For once I'd be ecstatic to see a daddy's boy riding in a white Lamborghini thinking he's better than everyone else.
After running for at least thirty minutes, I stop to catch my breath.
My entire body shakes silently as I breathed heavily.
I plop down on the cold cement sidewalk in a cross-legged position and wipe the sweat from my forehead before finally noticing the smell I was producing, causing me to gag.
I smell like a guy's room that hasn't been cleaned in at least a day.
My eyes wander again, and again, everything was empty.
Forcing myself up, I mutter, "Right, time to go."
As much as I want to stop running, I can't, if I stay here, they'll find me eventually.
There's only one place they'll (probably) never find me, to work.
For once I'm not pissed about going to work, to Café Kirei. I have got to change that stupid name, my stupid little sister wanted to name it, but that doesn't matter, at least not anymore.
As everything around me turned dark, the streetlamps turned on one by one and it somehow made things look even creepier.
I rush my steps and listen to everything around me, and all that I hear are my footsteps, not even a honk or a Kpop fan singing DNA.
What the hell is wrong with this city? Well a lot of things, but last time I checked the lack of Karens wasn't one of them.
It's like every person's been abducted or something overdramatic from an overrated science fiction movie.
I feel my feet ache as I continue to sprint, my body wanting to give in to my tiredness.
Everything's fully dark by the time I get to the Café, thankfully I still have the keys on me because I'm still wearing my uniform. What? Can't a woman eat before she changes?
I shove the thing in the hole, open the door, stopping my reflex of turning on the lights— the café would stick out like a sore ass.
Right, I have to get out of these nasty clothes, and if I remember correctly there should be spare clothes in the back, Shannon always kept them there in case she needed it.
I glance around the back, everything was in place, and if I know my shit— "Aha!"
I snatch the clothes from the locker and sigh exasperatedly.
Shannon is one of my coworkers/slave/useless bitch who breaks a cup every 3 hours, and for the first time since I hired her, she came in clutch.
I strip my clothes off then and there, I just can't stand the smell anymore!
I toss my dirty clothes on the ground, not caring where, and examine the outfit Shannon left, we did have similar body types, so this should be good.
A pair of jeans, a pastel blouse, and ooh a bra and underwear! I didn't think she'd prepare a bra, but I guess I don't have to worry about that anymore.
Unclipping my bra, I start to think of what the hell was happening. For starters, the town's deserted, a purge maybe? That'd explain a lot of things actually, but something weird has been happening all week.
One of our customers, Mr. Gertrude, don't ask, is one of the grumpiest bitches I've met, and he loves coming here every morning to give us the loveliest compliments he could, note my sarcasm.
But then just the other day he started being nice to us, and he had a wrinkly smile on his prune of a face, it was creepier than the time my roommate in college started sleep stripping with his eyes wide open, it was sexy, yes, but not when the guy was staring into your soul.
Apparently, he got back with his wife, which is unlikely... that guy is annoying as hell, I wouldn't like him even if he was my dad, and I don't even like my real dad.
It still gives me goosebumps remembering how nice he was being, almost makes me feel bad.. almost.
It wouldn't have been that weird if he was the only one who suddenly changed, but one of my lackeys— I mean coworkers, Jay, is the broodiest college kid I know, but last week he started flirting with me, and it's cute and all but out of character.
And he was smiling too.
What does this all mea—?
CRASH!
I hear a loud noise from the entrance and I rushed to zip my pants up, not bothering to put on the blouse, then I take the closest thing I could use as a weapon, a pair of scissors.
I sneak quietly to the door and peer through the tiny window on it and scanned the room.
A couple of tables are knocked over and a guy, isn't wearing a suit like those Chads, but still... I can't trust him.
I ready the scissors in my hand and open the door silently, he was just sitting on the floor by the knocked over tables scratching his head.
My heart was pounding loudly, if I have to, I'll kill him. That's just how I need to think, it's him or me.
When I got right behind him, I arm locked his neck and pressed the scissors against his neck.
"Who the hell are you? Talk. Now, or else." I press it more against his throat, I feel his heartbeat loudly as I did.
"I-I mean no harm I promise!" He had a deep voice, and yet it seemed as if I was listening to a kid talk.
"You didn't answer my question." I tightened my hold on him, causing him to choke slightly.
I let him breathe a bit, I can't kill him... not yet, he still has to talk.
"M-My name's C-Coco," he coughs loudly, takes a deep breath, then touches the arm that was pressed against his neck.
I let go of him, not knowing why and watch him turn around to face me.
His expression turned serious and he says something I never thought I'd never think he'd say:
"I'm here to rescue you."
Cinder Evans - 16 - Boston
"Hey, Cinder!" My best friend, Taylor, called out to me.
We were in my room, I was sitting on my bed reading a book when he entered.
We were both in our last year of high school, and everything was going perfectly.
"Hi, Taylor. Where've you been?" I say, planting a kiss on his cheek.
We're also dating, for almost a year now, he asked me out on a date with his usual dumb blush, and I couldn't say no.
"Uh... I was just practicing the piano with my sister." He scratched his arm embarrassedly.
He was an amazing player, I love listening to him play Debussy or Mozart... though, why do I have the inkling that he's lying?
I pouted and studied his figure, he was probably doing that again.
"Tay?" I stared up at him pointedly, he was a few inches taller than me.
"Yeah?" He looked away guiltily.
"You did it again didn't you?" I waited for him to answer and he just nodded.
I walked towards him, then hugged him tightly.
"You know, you're handsome the way you are."
He returned the hug and buried his face in my hair.
"I-I... y-you're just saying that out of pity~ I know I'm a disgusting piece of filth that shouldn't even be alive." I felt tears wet my hair, he was crying again.
I let go of him and cupped his face, "No, you're not! Here, I'll prove it!" I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him full on the lips, sweet, innocent, lovingly.
I pulled away from him after a few seconds and smiled, "You don't ever have to change, you're great just the way you are."
He didn't say anything; he just stood there with a bright blush on his cheeks.
"I really like you, you know," I whispered, kind of embarrassed.
"I really like you too.."
Everything was right at this moment, everything was just the way it needed to be, just the two of us.
"Let's go get you some food, hon." I took his right hand and smiled.
We walked in peaceful silence as we headed out of my room and to the kitchen, which was surprisingly empty of my mom who loved to cook.
I checked in the fridge and all that was there was a couple of leftovers from last night's dinner, "On second thought, wanna get Ben and Jerry's? We'll get your fave flave!" I said enthusiastically.
"I don't know.." He poked and prodded at his body and I took them in mine.
"Not even for Red Velvet Cake?" I teased him with a cheeky smirk, and as I did, his face turned the same colour as the ice cream I mentioned.
"O-Okay.. maybe a pint wouldn't hurt.."
I chuckled softly and bring the two of us outside to his car. "Do you wanna drive, or should I...?" I ask him.
"It's okay, I'll drive, you're probably still tired after all." He says thoughtfully.
I'm part of the debate team in our school, and I may not look it but I love debates, and I was practicing before Taylor arrived, I was acting cool and all but I was actually pretty embarrassed.
As we sit down, me in the passenger side, and him at the wheel, I reach for the radio and ask, "Whachu wanna listen to? Let's get dancy!!"
He looks at me thoughtfully, his brimming eyes, and the cute little freckles that dusted his nose and cheeks.
When we cuddle in bed, I like trailing my fingers on his back to try and count them, and Taylor gets really flustered when I do.
(Y'all, I find people with freckles so freaking adorable, like Fuyuhiko Kuzuryuu, Tadashi Yamaguchi, freckled Jesus, Mukuro Ikusaba, if you have freckles you are truly beautiful, and if you don't, you're truly beautiful too!)
"I'm not sure... I was kinda thinking Mean Girls..?" I smile widely and pick the best song to start— Revenge Party!
I hear him laugh cutely then lace our fingers together, I love it when he's trying to be intimate, it's adorable.
We sing along to the song and hold hands tightly.. everything is perfect.
Perfect?
I stare him directly in the eyes, and I can't help but feel like my heart's gonna burst, why was I blessed with this beautiful man?
I don't know what would've happened if I turned him down that day, but I'm happy. We're happy.
And I think I love him~ no... I know I love him.
It probably sounds like I'm just a kid who hasn't experienced the world, but I've known Tay for more than a decade, and I don't think I can live without him in my life.
Even though I don't know what the future holds, I know I can make it if I have him by my side, I really love him.
His beautiful brown locks, which are way shorter than my dark blond hair, the way he fidgeted his fingers when he was nervous is so adorable, or the fact that he'd get upset when I mispronounce an anime character's name and his face just scrunches up into this pout that endears me more and more.
He turns to look at me, making my face flush, am I staring too much? I turn away to look out the car window, just to avoid his gaze.
"So... I think I'm in love with you." I blurt out without even meaning to. He stops the car in the middle of the road and stays silent, making me panic.
I immediately want to hide in a hole and die, what'll he say? Did I ruin things? Did I ruin us? Did I—
"I love you too, Cinder." Okay... I'm ready to die, someone please castrate me!
"Wh-What?" I feel my heart wanting to burst out of my chest and explode.
I turn to face him and feel a large lump in my form throat as I see a woman outside of our car pointing a gun at Taylor, who looks completely oblivious and my reflexes took over.
I dive down to his legs and force him to hit the gas pedal as fast as I could, and the car immediately started moving, the lady still tried to shoot, but instead of hitting Taylor, it hit the backseat window and out the opposite.
My ears start ringing from the sound and I just force Taylor to keep going.
"What the heck was that!" He's properly scared now, I'm still basically pressed against his crotch with my head on his lap.
Just when we think we lost her, we hear the loud revving of an engine right next to us. I raise myself from the position I was in and look out the driver-side window, it was the woman driving a Jeep.
I feel my heart race, why is she after us?! We're just normal high school students!
I look at Taylor worriedly and he looks just as scared as I do. One of his hands is clutching the wheel tightly, and the other on his chest, trying to calm himself down. I reach out my own to his and lace our fingers, giving him a soft squeeze to reassure him that I'm here with him.
"W-Why does she want to kill us?" His voice is high pitched, I shake my head, not really knowing what to answer him.
"C-Can't we just explain that we haven't done anything? If we just talk to her I'm sure she'll understand."
I stare at him and point at the backseat windows. He sighs, "Fair point, what do we do now? We can't just let her catch us."
"Floor it." I say, and he's hesitant, "I'd rather pay for a ticket than for a funeral," I joke, and a smile tugs at his lips.
"Okay.." He presses the gas pedal as hard as he could, and the car zoomed, leaving the Jeep fast behind us.
A few minutes pass by, the tense atmosphere around us made me sick.
A few minutes turn into an hour, our hearts are still racing, stress overtook our entire bodies.
"Uh, did we lose her?" He asks me, his hands are still shaking, but he doesn't let go of the wheel.
I turn around to look behind us... crap.
"She's still right on our tail!"
Why is this happening to us? I... I...
My vision turns foggy and tears trail down my face and drip down my lap. I'm crying... it's like the emotions I've been trying to hide Taylor all this time are coming out.
I'm terrified.
But there has to be a way we can get out of this weird situation— there just hast to!
I don't know what to do... we'll eventually run out of gas and get caught... is there noth~
And it hit me... the most heartbreaking truth.
"Tay... I think the only way one of us can get away is if one of us gives up to distract her.." My pants are soaking wet now, and I still can't stop crying.
I look at him and by the way he looks, he probably knows that too.
"I-I'll do it.. you have to live, Tay... I love you too mu~!"
"No," he says sternly, he was staring right ahead of us with a determined look on his face, "I'm gonna distract her while you get away. You have so much more to live for.. I've been holding you back from the start... it's time I return the favour, you know... it's always me who gets rescued by you."
I feel like I'm dying, "No! Tay! It has to be me— I can't let you sac~!"
"Stop, Cin, I've already made up my mind.. just promise me you'll live on for the both of us. There's a gas station up ahead, I'll slow down just enough so you can jump off, she can't know that you jumped off or she'll go right after you..." I felt his heartbeat through his wrist.. he's just as scared as I am, but I can't let him throw his life away!
We were nearing the gas station and he was beginning to slow down, my heart was breaking into a million pieces. "Tay, I~" I try, but he just squeezes my hand harder.
"Don't forget me okay? Now get out." He smiles softly, lets go of my hand and reaches to my side to open the door.
I shake my head violently, I refuse to let him die... I can't live in a world where he's not next to me...
"I-I don't know how I'd live in a world without you.." I mumble through my tears.
"Like this." Before I can react, he pushes me off the car and I stare at his weak smile as he did.
I land on my back and wince in pain, I immediately get over it and look up at the car.
"TAY! Let me back in there!" I balled my fist and banged against the door of the car.
"I love you, Cinder Evans."
Taylor Park and Cinder Evans
Taylor in normal
Cinder in [brackets]
[I scream incoherent things as he drove away from me, can't he hear me?]
I hear him scream in protest, I ignore him.
[If someone told me my boyfriend was going to leave me today, I wouldn't have thought it'd be this way.]
If someone told me I'd be in this situation a few hours ago, I probably would've laughed it off.
[My voice hurts from screaming, but I can't do anything else... I can't just let this happen.]
But now, all I can do is smile with regret.
[If I didn't say anything, would we both have run away from the woman until we inevitably got caught? I think that would've been better than this.]
My decision right then was a given, I'm not letting him lose his life for someone like me.
[I don't know who I am without you, Taylor... I can't remember a day without you.]
He made me everything I am today, he stood by me through everything, he embraced me when I was scared.
[I love you... why didn't I say it sooner... why couldn't I have understood my true feelings before today?!]
"I love you, Cinder Evans." I meant those words.
[My heart feels like it's gonna burst open like a piñata that's been beaten by children at a birthday party.]
Even now as I get closer and closer to what's most likely gonna be my last stand, I feel calm.
[A piñata that's been stepped on multiple times and ravished for its insides.]
Like a deep solace within myself knowing that he's okay.
[Is that a good analogy? I don't know anymore, all I can think about is him.]
Or something along those lines, I was never good with words, it was always Cinder who helped me find them.
[I was there right in the crowd as you performed, I felt proud of my boyfriend that could be so amazing. I'm pretty horrible with instruments, so I was drawn to your music.]
When I watched him debate on stage, it sent shivers up my spine, his passion, his way with words, it's something I'll never be able to do.
[He's amazing, I'm fussy.]
He's confident, I'm a coward.
[He's wonderful, I'm pitiful.]
He's everything I love, I'm nothing.
[I used to cry when your mom would take you home after our playdates, I guess I liked you from the start. I still do.]
We grew up together, we did everything together, we sang together.
[I can't help but look away, I'm scared... I don't want to see you... you...]
I look at the rearview mirror and feel my heart clench as I see Cinder slump, I'm sorry.
[Was it selfish of me to want to be with you?]
I'm sorry that we're not going to college together anymore.
[I know why you did the things you did to yourself, but you were perfect... you are perfect.]
I'm sorry for being an awkward boyfriend.
[I wanted us to last until the end... but not like this.]
I'm sorry I won't be able to grow old with you.
[I'm like a broken vase, just wishing that you'd pick up my pieces and put me back together.]
The steering wheel's wet, my hands are slipping a little but I grip it tighter, I can't lose my resolve.
[I force myself to stand, he's a long way away now, but I can still see it... maybe, just maybe...]
The Jeep is about a hundred metres away now, it doesn't look like it's moving very fast though, it must've noticed I turned back.
[I wince as I walk. Right. Left. Right...]
I grab my phone, turn it on and I'm greeted by my screensaver, a picture of Cinder's sleeping face, he got upset when he found out though, he looked like an angry strawberry.
[I turn my walk into a sprint, the tears staining my face like paint that an artist uses, like abstract art.]
I unlock it and get the voice recorder on.
[My body is aching, creaking, and groaning, but I can't stop running, if I do... I... I...]
I breathe deeply, glance at the car that's fast approaching, I'm gonna have to make this a bit quick.
[I can't let you do this, Taylor! I can't lose you.]
"Hey Cinder, I don't know if you're gonna hear this, but I have something I want you to hear." My voice feels shaky, yet I feel as calm as a corpse.
[My breathing is uneven, I feel like I could collapse any moment, but I refuse.]
"I don't know if you're even gonna hear this or not, but I just wanted to talk to you one last time."
[I scream in pain as I trip on the cracked road and fall headfirst onto the ground, I groan loudly, reach my hand to my forehead, I'm bleeding.]
"I know I haven't been the perfect friend or boyfriend, I'm far from it." I laugh quietly.
[I want to get up, but my body refuses to get up. I forcibly raise my head to see what's happening.]
"What I'm trying to say is, thank you. Thanks for being the most supportive, loving, caring, adorable boyfriend."
[He stops the car, the Jeep stops too. "No! TAYLOR! GET BACK IN THE CAR!" I wail out.]
"You wanted us to be together until we were wrinkly old men, and I wanted that too, to grow old with you, to have kids with you, to make a family with you." My face feels wet, I grip the phone tightly. I open the car door.
[I cry pathetically, and with all my might, I try to push myself off the pavement, but I just end up falling again.]
"I'm sorry I can't do it with you anymore... I'm sorry I'm leaving you." I take a big gulp and take a step out of the car.
[I keep screaming, yelling, hoping he'd do something.]
"I love you, you know. So that's why... that's why I made that choice. I want you to live, for the both of us. Live and find someone who'll love you the way I do. Don't blame yourself for what I did. Please live, my sweet prince."
[But why am I even screaming in the first place?]
"I guess this is it... just please reme~!" My words are cut short by a sharp pain erupting in my chest. I feel myself topple over on the road...
[I stare blankly at them. Huh.]
"P-Please r-remember," A tangy taste fills my mouth, and I look to where I left Cinder.
[I feel my expression twist and morph into something I can't describe.]
"I Love You," I say as I/he lay/s on the ground.
My eyes droop, I don't have much energy left... this is it I guess.
Cinder...
...
Cinder Evans - 16 - single
The woman drags his body into the Jeep.
Taylor's... gone...
Taylor...
I feel empty.
The expression on my face doesn't change.
That's when I realise what expression I have on my face.
I'm smiling from ear to ear.
"Taylor Rose, you do love me!"
Isn't it wonderful?
It was so much fun playing with you, Taylor.
Oops.
No, actually...
I never loved you.