What is my biggest fear? The Shim Daniel, one of the most powerful person in hotel business…. I'm the same person, who was left strayed on the side of the road…8 years later… Today he has turned into a person with utmost power on his hands… But still, what do I fear?
This thought kept me wondering as Rose was lying down on the bed. The chills I got on my skin on the sight of Rose drowning down in the pool, were unforgettable. My head was left empty except the only thought inside it, and that was to save Rose. I didn't even realize the moment when I jumped into the water and grabbed her hand tightly, the only person in front of me was Rose… Why does she affect me so much? Is this feeling related to my situation in the past? Am I seeing 19 year old myself within her? Whatever this feeling was, it felt somehow good…. I felt good by the presence of Rose around me. She was going through the similar situation as me, being left abandoned was the worst thing that could happen to one child. I know, I was just using her for my own selfish reasons and that may even possess threat to her life, but it can't be helped now…She was the perfect person I've ever found in 2 years of my long search for a spy and there was no way of me overlapping personal & professional emotions. Just to minimize the chances of her getting into dangerous situations, this training was important, extremely important…
Rose opened her eyes slowly as Maya placed a thermometer under her arms to check the temperature.
"She's good, no high fever. Take rest for today and get back to our training sharp at 7 AM tomorrow. Got it?" Maya packed her doctor kit and walked out of the room.
"Discovered a new talent of fainting down at every other place? It's already third time , can you stop for god's sake?" I couldn't tell her how much worried I was in my heart and instead vented out my anger unknowingly.
"Is it my fault now? Do I have to say this loudly? Are you that dumb to not realize, a person with almost zero penny in her pocket what would she eat to keep on surviving? Last night was my first full course dinner after 2 months….Isn't it obvious for me to have low energy and is easier for me to faint down?" She screamed and furiously threw a pillow at my direction.
"GET LOST!! Don't even stand in front of my eyes" saying this she went under her blankets.
How could my ice cold heart take this sudden rush of warm feelings? She was expressing herself in such a vague manner that I couldn't even process what was going through her mind. In fact she was the most selfish person ever who precisely knew what emotions to display on face and which feelings to keep hidden in her dark void. On the other end, I was used to hide all of my feelings….maybe those emotions were killed long ago and what left was just an empty hollow space in my heart….
I walked out of the room with heaviness all over my body. Will I be able to handle future consequences Rose was about to bring in my life?
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11:30 PM
Winter was in its bloom tonight…Cold breeze entering inside the room pushed me deeper into my thoughts, My emotional state became weak especially in the season….and it worsens up when first snow falls down on Damyang's bamboo trees. I could see Rose's window right opposite mine, lights were still on…Which meant she was awake… I went inside and sat down in cane swing at the end of the gallery , while my eyes were searching for Rose in her room. And… She stepped inside the gallery, wearing red satin night robe with a glass of red wine her hand. She didn't even seem like a high school student with that elegant beauty, my heart turned hotter just by the sight of her standing there, with her hands resting down on the metal railings, long black silky hair swaying in air. I couldn't take my eyes off her glistening skin in that dim blue light coming through room. A smile appeared on my lips without even me realizing…..
But all of a sudden her sharp eyes caught me off guard staring at her. I might've gotten panicked for the first time in these whole 8 years, I took away my eyes and looked down towards the pool park. But as soon as my eyes went down, I spotted Junho going outside the park with bath robe on is wet body.
"Is he okay? Swimming right now in this ice cold weather???" I said in shock.
I went down just to find him but he had disappeared already. I walked out near forest behind the resort and found him along with Maya talking to someone in dark bushes. My instincts were alarming me on seeing their serious facial expressions, the way they were talking to that anonymous person in bushes seemed very suspicious to me. I waited near the gate until they returned back with a white paper covered parcel in Maya's hands, but to avoid them getting startled with my presence I kept hiding behind bunch of bamboo trees and my black night pajamas helped me more to get camouflaged in darkness. They walked towards resort club, I followed them on my tip toes silently, not even sound of breathe as Junho had incredibly sensitive five senses. He instructed Maya to stand outside and went inside the club alone, in next few minutes he came out whispered in Maya's ears and both of them separated their ways to respective cottages. I kept standing far away being a live spectator of hideous activities going on in my own Resort. I went near the club door and tried unlocking it with the password, but as expected Junho had changed the password. What was exactly happening in this resort in my absence? Even though I had given all the responsibility of this property to Junho still he should've reported me what other activities he was carrying on in my absence. If not for Rose, I would've never visited Damyang in near future….and might've never figured out these suspicious things happening here. As I walked towards my cottage immersed in thoughts, a cold hand tapped on my shoulder. I turned behind and saw Rose standing there looking at me with seducing gaze in her eyes.
"Isn't anyone sleeping tonight in this resort?" I said with smirk on my face.
"Same goes to you Mr. Stalker" She smirked back at me.
"What?? When did I become a stalker?"
"I saw you stalking Mr.Kim and Maya, you're just like a cat….Sly cat", She said while imitating a cat.
We entered my cottage and I was quite surprised to see Rose follow me inside my cottage.
"Just leave Rose, stop following me. You were calling me a cat? When you're the one acting like a puppy now!" I said while knocking on her forehead with my index finger.
"Ahhh!!! Don't treat me like a kid!! I will become an fully grown adult in next month….Since the night we've met each other you've always treated me as a kid!!" She looked so cute with anger flushed on her cheeks that I had no option but to laugh at her.
"Why are you laughing????" She came closer to me.
I grabbed her waist and pulled more closer to me, "Because you looked so pretty, I couldn't resist myself."
"Do I look pretty in this night dress? Maya told me that you have personally selected my entire wardrobe…" She whispered softly in my ears.
I turned her around while gently pushing her on the wall of the living room, "Rose….the truth is that I hate Red, but do you know why did I choose this dress for you?"
She looked at me with confused eyes.
"Because, Red is your color….nothing can define your features more than Red…." I said as my lips went near hers but suddenly she held my collar and kept me hanging.
"If I'm Red…What are you? Uhmmm….Black? Yes, you're black… Mysterious black" She said while her eyes were calling me to get hold of her. I couldn't stop myself anymore and pushed my lips on hers fiercely. She crossed her fingers with mine with one hand while other hand went straight into my hairs. I pulled her more closer, we were so close that even air couldn't pass through between us. We kept kissing until we went out of our breathe, we were unstoppable…It was a wild , rough kiss…seemed like both of us were venting out our anger, frustration, coldness tonight with this hot moment which warmed our ice cold hearts.
But as her delicate fingers went to unbutton me, a current like alert passed through my mind and I pulled out my lips… She was quite flustered with my sudden move…. Not to make her anymore embarrassed, I pulled her close and wrapped in my arms.
"Rose….let's stop here for now….until you become an adult…"
"Why does that even matter to you right now??"
"It matters a lot, come I'll take you to your cottage." I tried holding her hands but she threw my hand away in anger.
"Coward", she gave me a sharp blade look and went out of the room banging the door loudly.
I sat down on the sofa watching Rose enter her cottage through my room's window. Until when we're gonna continue this push and pull? And is it safe for Rose to be romantically involved with me? A person like me? Who has murdered his own mother and struggled in juvenile for almost 2 years? Do I deserved to be loved? Do I deserve this warmth? I leaned my head on sofa and closed my eyes with questions stirring up my mind….