You don't like Aradia, you just think she's a cool troll from the few interactions the two of you had today. Her poem was beautiful and really spoke out to you, though you really didn't get the meaning for it. So yes, you like her a little bit, but only the intellectual stand point of her.
As you exited through the door, the cool night air hit your face. It wasn't warm nor cold, perfect enough that you wouldn't have to worry about wearing the thick sweater you had on. The stars were out, speckled randomly onto the black sky and not even one single cloud blocked the sight. You were always a fan of the stars, watching them sparkle with mystery and wondering if there's another planet with a better life for you somewhere. It's unfair to think there's nothing else better than this reality, but that's the harsh truth.
"Oh, hey you're Karkat right? I hope that's your name." With a glance over to your side, a cherry smile met your eyes as the troll stood beside you with her arms crossed in front of her chest. She had a short sleeve and a grey skirt that went to her ankles, a bit tattered at the end, but it didn't matter to you at all. Why were you staring at her clothes? You feel like a creep now, especially from earlier. In all reality though, her sudden presence made you nervous and you tried your best not to let it show.
"Yeah, and you're Aradia." You answered her, slipping your hands into the pockets of your jeans. At least she cared enough to remember your name, that's a plus in your book.
The red bloods featured were relaxed, gazing at the sky before turning back towards you. "I thought your poem was amazing by the way. It really spoke about what kind of person you are, especially with the freestyle writing. I wouldn't even attempt something so daring and unformated."
Did she just compliment you or nicely lay negative criticism to your writing? You were honestly conflicted on how to feel about that comment, so you assumed the worst. "It was shit anyways, you don't need to come over here and remind me."
"No, I actually liked it. It was deep and full of raw emotion, like it was just thrown onto the paper." Her hands flew out in front of her, exaggerating the thing she was explaining. "Not that many trolls can admit to more personal fears like you did."
"Oh..." Was all you could respond with. You have no idea how to feel or even say to the troll that seems genuine about her comment. It's like the message you're giving yourself is the complete opposite of what she's returning for you. Of course she couldn't be more correct when it was literally thrown onto the paper, but you don't want to accept any praise from her. You don't deserve anything like that.
Aradia lifted a hand and tucked some loose strands behind her pointed ears. "So... Are you coming back tomorrow?"
If you have the motivation to do so without wallowing in self pity all day, maybe. "I suppose. Do you want to hear more of my shitty scribble writing or something?"
She let a smile form on her lips as a bit of laughter erupted, "If you want to call it that, then yes. I would love to hear more of your shitty scribble writing."
That kind of reaction had taken you back a bit by surprise. You certainly wasn't used to such positive vibes from someone you barely even know, only the unconditional support from your moirail. It was different to see someone else willing to even put up with your self destructive behaviors by laughing like everything is okay. The thought of having her take the time to come outside and encourage you, makes you want to actually come back. You made eye contact with Aradia before finally speaking, "Thank you."
"For what?" The red blood tilted her head to the side, but you froze with the response on the tip of your tongue.
The beating of your heart quickened dramatically as you stared into her eyes. The dark, maroon color gazed back and made a light flush upon your face as you darted to look at something else. She has a strange effect on you, but the situation made you clueless to what it was. You cleared your throat and avoid the eyes that were still on you. "Uhm- you know, for complimenting me. I really liked yours too."
With a bright smile, she opened her mouth to say something but was stopped as you felt a hand resting upon your shoulder. You glanced to the side to see Sollux standing there with a sly smile on his features. For the first time in your life, you gave the most calm but low-key back the fuck off expression to the yellow blood. If he says anything remotely damaging, you're going to snap and beat the shit out of him.
"I've been looking for you K.K.!" Sollux leaned against you with his hand giving your shoulder a squeeze. "I thee you've met this lovely creature already."
The female troll gave a wave towards your friend as if she knew him, leaving you very confused. "Hey Sollux, I was surprised to see you here today."
"Me too, but I'm just here to thupport my friend." He removed his hand from it's resting place and gave your back a good slap. You frowned a bit, not wanting to be pissy in the company of the red blood, which is killing you on the inside to hold back.
"Well, I hope the two of you come back tomorrow!" She exclaimed and stepped towards your direction. You didn't know how to react when she placed her arms around your skinny frame, resting her head to the side. She was a little shorter than you, her height reaching exactly to your shoulders. The warmth of her body was comforting, but this action made you even more confused than you actually were. After releasing you from the embrace, she looked up at you with an unreadable expression. "Thank you too."
With a turn of her heels, she walked off with nothing else but a glance back. You could feel the corners of your mouth turn upwards at her simple words, giving a wave as she slowly moved away and became a blob into the darkness.
"Wow, you're so fucking whipped by her." Sollux burst out laughing, but in all honesty you didn't give a shit what he said and ignored his comment.
You noticed Kanaya waving you over and started walking over to the jade blood, starting the little adventure home together. It was quiet, besides the small bickering between your friend and moirail about the importance of writing. Of course you weren't listening, you didn't have an opinion about it anyways.
The first drop off was Kanaya, but only after exchanging goodbye hugs and receiving teased jokes by the ignorant yellow blood. A while later, he eventually went a separate path from your hive as well.
It was the first time in a long time you were okay walking alone; being alone with your thoughts. You weren't scared, worried, or thinking the worst, not even the constant reminders of your burning skin was affecting your mood.
When you finally arrived to the hive, you opened the door to see both of your family members sitting on the couch. Your brother immediately stood up, but your father was more focused on something he was writing. "Hey guys, I'm back." You spoke up and closed the door behind you.
"Hello Karkat, how was the literature club?" Kankri relaxed back down next to your father and crossed his legs.
You gave a slight shrug, "It was good, nothing to really complain about since Kanaya was with me. There's another one tomorrow I'm wanting to attend though, if I can."
The elder of the hive raised an eyebrow and the other mimicked the same expression. Your father spoke up, "If you're asking for permission, then yes. As long as you return home right after."
With a nod to your head, you agreed with those terms. "I can do that."
"Oh, and bathe yourself tonight. The sermon is ready for tomorrow and you're attending this time, no protests." You could feel the dissatisfaction in your father's voice, but you rolled your eyes anyways. Looks like you can't escape it this time.
"Fine! Can I go now? Or am I going to get interrogated more than usual?" An irritated tone was laced into your voice, but you truly could not care less in this situation. You just want to relax in your room for a bit just like you always do and recollect your dazed thoughts from today.
Your father waved his hand at you as a sign he clearly was pissed off now and your presence is no longer needed.
Gladly taking that offer, you made your way down the hall and into your room. You collected a few items for the bath before heading into the bathroom, the water was already waiting for you and obviously used. The order was youngest to oldest of the hivehold, but this is what you get for coming home later than usual. Stripping down, you were careful of avoiding damaging the bandages as you made yourself comfortable in the slightly murky water.
Trying to relax in the lukewarm water was more of a hassle than it seemed. Your sore muscles from the other nights charades were catching up to you quickly and keeping your mind occupied with pains wasn't the least distractive therapy. The resentment that's coursing through your pathetic mutant veins from such stupidity, and the lingering guilt of your actions were still there. The merciless degrading feeling of uselessness was also still lurking in the ugly pool of self-hatred you call yourself. No matter the fact that a bath will drift away insecurities is a fat lie. At least you'll be smelling a lot less like a community ass-rag.
The only positive thought that plagued your cranium was over powering even the dark places that hid away. It was making you feel vulnerable and weak, yet this time you weren't afraid. Her lips were painted the color you strived to hate, the simple embrace she gave still lingered on your coward body, and the way she made you felt was all terrifyingly new, yet you liked it. You were feeling... Well, you weren't too sure what the fuck it was, but the thought of one troll; Aradia Megido.