I looked at the pair of jeans I had that did somewhat fit me with using the floor mirror I had in my bedroom. They were tight around my thighs and waist, but made me hips show mariculously.
I turned sideways and my heart dropped into my stomach. Weight did show and I had some belly fat growing out of my stomach and my thighs looked bigger, making my butt slightly bigger.
I sighed heavily as I changed the jeans I had to black and white plaid sweatpants and threw over a black shirt that had the words I'm basically a girl with a personality of a dude written in white letters.
I went downstairs and was faced with my parents who were sitting down at the kitchen table. I walked over towards them as I grabbed a water bottle from the fridge and sat down on the counter.
My dad sighed as he removed is glasses and looked down at his newspaper as my mom got up to greet me.
"Robin, my dear! How was school?" She greeted, asking me a question we both knew she didn't care to know. She just wanted to make small talk.
I forced a smile, "Average, how was work?" I use the same question, giving her a sign I don't care to know. Again, making small talk.
"Tiring as usual. Lots of paperwork to do, how about you watch a movie while I get dinner prepared. Anyone up for spaghetti?" She asks and my stomach grumbles at hearing a food name.
My parents looked at me with wide eyes and I quickly turn away before throwing myself on the couch and choosing a movie.
Moms in a good mode, dads stressed. Definitely a regular work day. I tell myself as I look through movies through Netflix.
Example of me being observant of people's moods, body language, and facial expressions.
I smell the spaghetti sauce after about half the movie is in and my stomach grumbles. I press my stomach with my hand, silently groaning. My stomach hurt and I was hungry, but I knew I shouldn't.
I already worked out the fat, I'm not building it after I just witnessed some belly and thigh fat and weight gaining just a few minutes ago. I couldn't.
I put my focus back on the movie and ignored the spaghetti sauce that made my stomach continue to grumble. I pressed my stomach with my fingers, silently groaning at the thought of food.
"Dinner!" My mom yelled. I got up, taking deep breaths as I prepared myself and walked over to the kitchen.
My mom had an apron on and was getting herself a bowl for me and handed it to me while my dad started eating some of spaghetti from his plate. His eyes were glued to the newspaper in front of him.
I gulped as I stared at the amount of spaghetti my mom had made. My stomach grumbled so loud that both my parents stopped what they were doing to stare at me.
I placed my hand on my stomach, rubbing it as I forced a groan and had other reply grabs escape my lips.
"Can I eat later? My stomach hurts really bad." I lied, trying to sound convincing. My mom nodded as she placed my bowl back with the other utensils.
I ran up to my room and let out a breath I had apparently been holding and threw myself over my bed as I stared at the ceiling. I sighed as I got up and took a few sips from the water that sat on my night stand.
I opened my door and led myself out of my room to the balcony. I took a seat and stared out into the distance as wind brushed over my shoulders. A couple minutes later, I realized I was shivering.
I rubbed my shoulders and yawned as my gaze never left the distance and everything else. It was always peaceful where I sat, wind would be blowing and I could always see a sunset.
It was nice, mostly because night was when it was mostly cold, but also because it was a place I felt safe.
I felt like myself.
I have a few of these places where I feel like myself and at home with. My balcony, the Forest, boxing matches, and races. The matches and the races make me feel more alive than safe-it can be nerve wracking knowing the cops could come at any time.
But beside that those four places were my favorite. All were different and similar in their own way. That's why I liked them. That's why they were my favorite places.
They were different.
Guess I never experienced different in my life apart from my sister leaving for college. I guess I tried to find that difference that I needed by going and doing things that were...
well, different. Something and somewhere that was really out there.
Something and somewhere that made me realize something was different about me apart from other people, but these places never satisfied my needs.
They just made me feel different from other people. It had nothing to do with actual difference in my life.
But one day maybe something different would happen, and maybe I could live an unpredictable, adventurous life.
And maybe just a little bit of danger.
~•~
"How far are we with the project?"
Ashton stared at the papers we had already written on. I tapped the eraser of my pencil repeatedly on the desk as I waited for a response. Ashton took forever to answer. Scratch that, takes forever.
"A third I'd say, we need to finish coming up with ideas and start writing. Once we do, we have to put in full effort on what were writing and try to be creative, but imaginary." He replied. I nodded.
A guy with strong ambitions. Another thing that makes him different from my friends. He's determined, but so is another.
One that doesn't get the hint and never will.
"I did have a few ideas on what should lead up to the falling action," I start, "We could add twist and turns and completely turn this story upside down. Make it unpredictable." I state, words flying out of my mouth without my control.
Ashton looks at me in amusement as if he impressed with my opinion. He nods and gathers the papers and books that laid on top of his desk.
"I can tell you're one to read unpredictable stories. Read any Steven King or R. L. Stein?" He asks.
I nod, crossing my arms against my chest. "Cliche books are predictable and over rated. The thing I like most about horror is how unpredictable it can be."
"Once you think you know what's going on, the author throws a curve ball. You get left on cliff hangers, sacrificing your sleep to finish the book." Words spit out of my mouth and Ashton listens intently.
His expression tells me he's actually listening, but at the same time he's thinking of something else. Could be anything, I just know he's slightly interested.
"What's your opinion on Romance books?" He questions and I stare at him, confusion overlapping my features.
I scoff, "Romance. Well that's difficult to answer." I look away, unintentionally.
Romance was my least favorite genre, only because I didn't have too much knowledge in what it felt like. As naïve as it sounds, I only know about Romance from the movies.
The cliche, bad boy falls for main character, mean girls rip off, girl in love with brothers best friend, books. They were all the same.
Nothing, but rated R Disney bullshit. It's nonsense really. Bad boys never turn into the good boys because of the protagonist, they turn into good boys for the protagonist.
Doing something they think their SO would want. Completely ignoring the fact they should choose what they want instead of thinking of others. That's selflessness, but sometimes you have to put your needs first.
You make decisions for yourself, not others.
Ashton never left my gaze even though I was looking away. I could his gaze burning into me. He said nothing as I sat there, letting my thoughts rome freely throughout my head.
"Romance is overrated, weddings are outdated, relationships never last, and sex is a waste of time." I respond, a deep and distasteful voice taking over my original voice.
I stare back at Ashton with an icy and stern look while he lets a black expression sit on his face. Not exposing any expression or emotion in his features.
He says nothing, instead he shoves his books and papers into his backpack as an amused smile tug at his lips. I raise an eyebrow at him when his eyes meet mine.
Damn those hazel eyes.
I clear my throat as I look away and wait for the bell to ring. I could still feel his eyes on me as I pretend to type something on my phone. I didn't even care of the teacher saw me, my A is the only reason she won't call me out.
Which is another reason why I hate this school.
People never call each other out or snitch. It would be nice to get into a fight and have a reason why you'd see someone trying to rearrange another's face. I say that in the most serious tone a lawyer could use.
"I'm glad we see eye to eye."
I face Ashton again and I see him get up and right as I'm about to reply, the bell interrupts me. Everyone gets up and leaves, and as I'm walking out of the classroom Ashton turns around and stops.
His eyes on me as I walk closer to him. It gets creepy, but for some odd reason I feel my face completely flushed.
Great, I'm attracted to creeps. Joy.
He grabs my arm before I walk further away and I turn around, raising an eyebrow at him.
"School entrance, see you there." He says, but it comes out slightly as a question.
He lets me agree or disagree, but I immediately know the answer. It's better to finish this project and get closer to him. The more I find out about him the better.
I nod and so does he as he walks away, his hands digging in his pockets. I stand there, watching his figure walk further away from mine. It was almost like I was gawking at him, like how my first reaction was when we first met each other.
I slap myself when I realize how long I had been standing there. I start walking closer to locker as people start leaving theirs. I open it as I shove my books inside it. I shut it and realize more people start leaving and head to their classes.
Something was different about Ashton, almost in an intriguing way. Something that made me fond about him that I didn't understand or realize, but of course I didn't know what it was. Could be anything.
I was just hoping that something wouldn't turn into feelings. Romantic ones.
~•~
It's been fifteen minutes since we started walking to Ashton's house. Whenever we start walking we don't talk, just like last time.
We both agreed we would go to his house, I was hoping he would havens younger sister. Nothing could make someone fall for you easier when their younger sister liked you.
I don't know why. I just know that if the guy you like has a younger sister and she likes you, you better know that your crush will it adorable. Unless it's an older sibling then it gets tricky.
There's nothing much to really say. After this project I'm guessing he'll want absolutely nothing to do with me. The only reason why I'm disappointed is the stupid bet.
Let's face it, this bet was getting absolutely nowhere.
I'm only happy that the Rose drawing gave us a few moments to bond. Apart from that, we either said nothing or argued. At least the project was getting somewhere, I just wish something else would also go somewhere.
He leads the way and turns left, and we start walking past a few of the houses on the street. They all are either light brown, pale white, or a dark brown.
The houses were similar to ones on my street, keeping in mind that Ashton doesn't live too far so that explains why the houses are similar.
He stops and I copy his action as I examine where we stopped in front of. A two-story light brown with some pale white covering the brown. There was a balcony, like mine, and a gate.
He swung the gate opened and pulled out his keys as he started unlocking it. I took the few seconds I had to admire the simple exterior his house had. Boring yes, but there's nothing wrong with simple. Unless it's my house.
He unlocked the door as I followed him to his kitchen and he threw his keys on the counter, and yelled out for someone. Of course, I had no idea who it was.
"CASON!" He yelled.
I jumped at him and had a slight heart attack at his sudden yell. He rolled his eyes and placed his backpack on the couch, yelling again.
"CASON HART! If you're fucking someone in my room again, I swear to god!"
My eyes widen and I bite my lip. "Again?"
Ashton turns around and faces me with an embarrassed look. He sighs heavily and laughs silently to himself.
"About week ago, I found my brother banging someone in my room. Note the fact his bedroom is downstairs and mine is upstairs. I had to bleach my sheets twice because of that idiot." He replied, laughing a bit at the last part.
A laugh escapes my lips and I cover my mouth with my eyes wide and both my eyebrows raised upon shock. Ashton raises one of his at me with a smirk placed on his face.
"What's with the shock? Have you never laughed before?" He jokes, but he turns out to be half right.
I nod, hiding my expression as I look away.
I don't laugh a lot. I may chuckle, but it's not genuine. I rarely ever laugh because people aren't funny nowadays. Why is Ashton so different?
Why does he have such a weird effect on me? And what is this affect?
I clear my throat, "So this Cason is your brother, he's not like ten or something right?" Ashton nodded. "You think a ten year old would have sex?" He questioned.
I shrugged, grinning at his response. "What? If a fourteen year old can get pregnant I don't see why a ten year old can't." I defend and cross my arms and look away.
I hear Ashton laugh and I turn around to see him smiling as his head is turned away from mine. I could tell he was fighting back a smile as he tried to cover it. Unfortunately for him, I could see that smile.
I heard stomping on the stairs and instantly my head turned towards the other direction, so did Ashton's. We both kept our gaze on where the footsteps were coming from, and soon enough a teenager boy came out.
Yes, a boy. He wasn't fit like Ashton. He was kind of skinny with some muscle. You can tell he's the type to say he works out every day, when he's really working out twice a week.
I have plenty of knowledge from my sister.
The boy kept his hoodie over his head and his hands in his pockets as his figure walked closer to us.
Ashton raised his eyebrow with his arms crossed against his chest. He walked over to the boy who I was guessing was Cason and the boy looked away with an annoyed look.
"What took you so long?" He asked and the boy rolled his eyes. "I took like two minutes!" The boy yelled and I let an amused smirk sit on my lips.
"Impatient ass." Muttered the boy, but Ashton and I both were able to hear him.
The boy cocked his head to the side, staring at me. He arched an eyebrow at Ashton and walked over to me, putting all his attention on me.
I looked the guy up and down, a blank expression exposing through my features.
He was skinny with some muscles. He had the same chocolate brown hair like Ashton, but with brown eyes. He was slightly shorter than Ashton, but slightly taller than me. If I were to guess his age, he looked fifteen to me.
I don't think a fourteen year old would already want to swipe their V-Card.
A grin played on his lips as he continued to stare at me with Ashton still crossing his arms now putting his focus on me. I met his eyes, but he looked away.
"Who's the black haired? Thought you had a girlfriend." The boy stated, still not looking away from me. I raised an eyebrow at him.
"Are boys and girls not allowed to be just friends?" I asked and the boy shrugged.
The boy reminded me of Ashton. They two were obviously brothers with how similar they looked and their relationship seemed to be. I was just wondering where the parents were, but then I remember correctly that Ashton said he lived with his dad and brother.
I had only just remembered now. He had a brother, no sister. Probably not even a mother. I remembered not pushing it just because I thought it would be a little too forceful just to ask about it. So I had put it aside, I did the same with this thought.
"Cason, she's my partner. We're only here to work on our English project." Ashton replied as he pulled the boy away from me, giving me some space. "Besides, why would you even think I'd cheat on Cassidy?" He asked. Cason shrugged.
Cassidy...On the phone, Ashton called her Cass. Great, he has a nickname for her. Bet she has one for him too. It's probably like Ash or Ashy or some crap that's cringe, but they find it cute. Disgusting.
"She's hot and your type. You always liked black hair and blue eyed girls. Said it yourself." Cason defended and I smirked at Ashton while raising an eyebrow.
Ashton's face went completely flushed and both me and Cason laughed at Ashton's embarrassment. Ashton groaned and looked away.
"Never said that." He muttered. "Tell that to the tomato all over your face." I whispered, loud enough for him and his brother to hear. Cason immediately started bursting into laughter.
He even fell on the floor and had tears streaming down his face. Ashton rolled his eyes and looked back at me. I stared at him with the blue orbs in my eyes and Cason's laughter started to cease.
Ashton cleared his throat, getting his brother's attention. Cason looked at Ashton, still trying to handle his breathing and laughter.
"We will be in my room working on finishing up. If you get hungry, there's leftovers in the fridge."
Cason nodded, still smirking. "Sure, 'working on finishing up.' Got it." He made quotation marks at the working on finishing up part and then made a thumbs up at Ashton. Ashton muttered something that was inaudible for me to hear, but audible for Cason.
Cason immediately started running with Ashton chasing after him and I shook my head as I headed upstairs.
Brothers. I said to myself as I walked into a room that looked like Ashton's. I examined the room, looking around at what a teenagers room would look like if they were a guy.
The walls were pale white and the floor was carpet. A decent sized grey-ish bed was in the middle of the room with a nightstand next to it. A desk with a laptop, a mouse, some books, and paper on it was acrossed from the bed.
A light brown wardrobe was on the other side of the bed and there was a white hamper with no clothes in it. What mostly caught my eye was the guitar in the corner.
I walked over to it and strum one of the strings. The guitar was black and it looked beautiful to say the least. I walked away from it when I heard footsteps and sat in the chair that was with the desk and patiently waited for Ashton to open the door.
When he came in, my eyes met his and he closed the door, sitting down on his bed as he grabbed some papers from his backpack and handed me a few. I grabbed a pencil on his desk and looked over at Ashton who's eyes were on mine.
He cleared his throat, catching me off guard and sat in front of on top of his bed with his backpack off the side.
"Shall we begin?"