My name is Jonathan Joestar.
I'm just kidding, that's not my name.
My real name is Yamato Kaida. People call me Yato for short.
Hey Yato-kun!
Yo Yato-san!
Yato-san, how you've been?!
Yeah, I'm your friendly neighborhood Yato. I'm just a 15-year-old boy who has great grades in school and for some reason, people think I'm a rich boy because of my appearance and my charisma.
Honestly, I'm just an average boy who plays games and watches anime for a living. I like playing r-18 games and watching western porn whenever my parents aren't around. You could say I'm a hardcore otaku whenever I'm alone.
Yeah, I'm a virgin, never experienced love before.
But! Out in this terrible world filled with violence and competition, I will find true love and live a happy story! You know, like those people in novels and manga.
If only reality wasn't this shitty. I could've gotten a girlfriend by now.
Well... I do get confessions from girls, but they don't suit my interest. I honestly don't know if I even want a girlfriend. I mean, with my hobbies, will they even accept me once they discover that one guy in their school is a hardcore otaku?!
I think not, that's why I reject those girls. They would never accept my nature.
Anyway, I'm getting off-topic. The reason why I'm narrating all this crap is just a backstory.
Let's move on.
I was walking down the street from the nearby cafe I go to. I always get a coffee with heavy amounts of sugar and milk. I like my coffee sweet.
Along the way, I met up with one of my friends, Mako. He's this short boy who has rich parents and he's a childhood friend.
"Aye Yato! What's going on?!" He greeted me with a bright smile.
"Mako, nothing much, just heading to school. How about you?" I replied back as I took a sip of my coffee. Mhm, sweet.
"Oh, just came back from the store, bought this new doujin." He'd pulled out a book with a nude girl on the cover.
"What doujin is that? Wait, don't tell me it's the new one that just came out!"
"Yeah, bro!"
"No way!"
"Aye guess what."
"Huh?"
He'd reach in his bag and pull out another doujin with the same cover.
"I got you one as well!"
"Hell yeah!"
He handed me the book and I started scanning through the pages. Ohoho! Can't wait to read this when I get home.
"Alright, I should put this somewhere safe."
I'd open up my bag and place the doujin inside.
If you haven't already noticed, Mako is the only person to know about my hobbies. And coincidentally, he has the same hobby as well!
We're like brothers from another mother.
"Alright, we should get going or we'll be late," Mako said as he checked his phone. I took out my phone as well and it was 8:30.
"Let's get going."
"Yeah."
We ran down the street towards our school. Can't be late for school or else my parents will kill me. Well, they get home pretty late so they won't get a call from school anytime soon.
A few minutes later, we arrived on the street across from the school.
"Alright, we arrived."
"Yeah, and with only three more minutes before we're late."
"Heh heh, I was a bit worried we weren't actually gonna make it. Well then, let's go."
This is when the tragedy took place.
I wasn't paying attention to the road until I heard a horn.
"Yato, watch out!!!"
"Huh?"
I turned my head and coming straight towards me was a truck. No way, is this...
The infamous truck that sends you to another world?
Within a few seconds, the truck crashed into me and I flew into the air. Eventually, I rolled across the road and laid there.
I-is this really how I die? I'll be dying a virgin, huh?
"Ahh! Shit, Yato, are you alright?" Mako came running up to me with a terrified look on his face. He was trembling and his voice was shaky.
"Ma...ko..."
"Don't worry man, I'll call an ambulance right away." He'd take his phone out and began to dial 119 until I stopped him.
"Huh?"
"It's no use Mako. Once one gets hit by truck-kun, it's over. My time is up... my fate... is sealed."
"D-don't be like that man! This isn't your death flag! Please, don't follow the light just yet!"
I'm sorry, Mako. Our friendship these past few years was amazing. I never had such an amazing friend. The only person to ever appreciate my hobbies.
"I'm sorry Yato. I was going to introduce you to my girlfriend too."
...
"WHAT?!" I yelled but coughed up blood right after.
Did I hear that correctly?
"Yeah bro, I have a girlfriend. Didn't I text you?"
"No, unless you typed girlfriend as grillfriend."
"Oh... I didn't know I typed that wrong."
"You idiot... Did you... at least lose your virginity?"
"Yeah bro, we had an amazing night."
"Ahh... I see."
I coughed blood. I was beginning to lose my hearing.
"Mako... before I fade away, can you show me the first several pages of that doujin?"
"Huh? Alright, bro."
Mako took out his copy of the doujin and began showing me the pages.
"Ahh... that was alright."
"Yep bro. It's your favorite, loli hentai."
I'd flick him in the forehead and he pulled back.
"Idiot," I said, "Don't mix in our fetishes. You know what I like. Mature and petite women."
"Yeah, I know."
My vision was becoming blurry. Well, it looks like I don't have much time left.
"Mako."
"Yeah?"
"Take this."
I reached into my pocket and pulled out my house keys.
"Go up to my room and take my laptop. Don't ever show it to my parents, you can keep it. The password to my laptop and my accounts are..."
"Are?"
"Whothefuckisrem6921."
"Wow... what a long-ass password."
"I know, it's fucking amazing, isn't it?"
"You know, my password was... hentaifromYatosucks420."
"Your password is even longer and what do you mean? The hentai I choose is peak level!"
"No isn't bro! It sucks! I couldn't get turned on by that shit!"
"You recommend me rape!"
"You recommend me vanilla!"
"Is vanilla not good!" I'd coughed and vomited another heavy amount of blood.
"It's too bland!" Mako began to cry.
God damn it... I should cut him some slack.
I was beginning to lose my strength. Well, it looks like this is it.
"Mako... take all of my doujins that I keep under my bed. And that is my last wish. Do whatever you like with it. Sell it or just give it to someone."
I don't want my parents to find out what hobbies their son has been up to. I want them to just be proud of the son they raised. As long as they don't find out, I can die peacefully.
"If that's what you wish for, then I will do it."
"Oh, and one last thing before I fade."
"Huh?"
With all the remaining strength I had, I lifted my hand and stuck my middle finger at him.
"Fuck... you."
"W-what for?"
"For having a fucking girlfriend be... fore... m... me..."
I didn't have any strength left. I think my heart stopped. But I can see so I think I'm still alive. I just hope I can rest in peace.
"Rest in peace bro. Unless... you get isekai'd since a truck did hit you."
I gained a bit of strength and put my hand on his shoulder.
"Yato?"
"Mako... don't fucking jinx things like that. Now I'm definitely gonna be isekai'd." I said.
The pain I received from the crash was starting to fade away. Ahh... so I'm finally gonna die now? I've been alive for a bit too long if you ask me.
"Yato? Yato? Fuck... he's gone..."
***
Now I either expected to be greeted by some angel at a gate ready to welcome me into heaven or a burning gate with Cerberus standing there.
But no, what happens is that I'm floating around in this void of nothingness!
Wait, there's a light at the end. Am I finally going to be taken to heaven?
But when I open my eyes, there was a large field in front of me. The skies were clear as day and the sound of trees rustling was a bit soothing.
Is this... heaven? Cause it kinda does.
[Registering...]
A sudden voice in my head spoke and I jumped.
What the fuck was that!
[Enter your name: ...]
Huh?
This was weird. In front of me was a blue holographic message that wants me to enter my name? Was I put into some kind of VR game? And this place, it doesn't look like earth because earth definitely does not have large birds with three pairs of wings flying around in the sky. God damn it, I wanted to die peacefully, not play another game or get sent into another world!
Oh well whatever, I guess I have no choice but to comply.
So do I just like say my name or do I have to type it? Cause all I see is [Enter your name].
"Yamato." Is what I said but what came out of my mouth didn't sound like my name. It almost sounded like a monkey saying gibberish, but that's probably just my hearing.
[You have entered "Yamato". Will this be the moniker you will be known as?]
[Y/N?]
"Yeah, I guess." Same again; all that came out of my mouth was gibberish.
[Registering moniker...]
[Moniker registered!]
Ding!
Hmm? What the hell?
[Moniker: Yamato]
Hmm... now that I think of it, this must be some kind of system. Oh god, I was placed in another world with a system?
This couldn't have gotten any worse. I knew once Mako said isekai, I would get isekai'd. GOD DAMN IT MAKO!!!!!
"EEK EEK!" Was what came out of my mouth. Ok, this is getting weird, why the hell do I sound like a monkey?
Ding!
A message appeared in front of me.
[Please say status to look at your stats.]
"Status?"
Ring!
———————
[Info]
[Moniker: Yamato]
[Race: Monkey]
[Class: Vacant]
Soul Rank: Dismal
Core(s): Vacant
Title(s): Vacant
[Stats]
Level: 1
Hp: 100/100
Mp: 10/10
Strength: 10
Agility: 10
Defense: 10
Perception: 10
Intelligence: 10
Stat Points: 0
[Skills: Vacant]
[Passive skill(s): Vacant]
[Active skill(s): Vacant]
———————
Well well well, what do we have here? Soul rank? Dismal? Why is my soul rank dismal?
[In order to level up your soul rank, you need to perform certain tasks.]
And those tasks would be?
[Unavailable. Required level: 10...]
Aah bummer. Well, it would make sense. Sometimes you need to get to a certain level to know what something does. Do I also need a certain level for certain items?
[Affirmative.]
Wow.
Well then, I think I pretty much get the gist. So uhh, how do I level up?
[Slay monsters, eat, drink, etc.]
Slay monsters huh? I don't know, my stats don't look like they can beat anything up.
[Here are some tasks for you to level up.]
Huh?
[Task 1: Defeat the slime]
[Task 2: Eat a banana]
...
Are you messing with me? Really? Eat a banana?
[Nope. It depends on you. They both give the same rewards.]
Really? So if I eat a banana, I get the same amount of xp from defeating the slime?
[You will also gain the xp from the defeated slime, but it depends on you.]
What the hell? That's so easy. Just eat something and you get the same amount of xp from task 1. Also, why specifically a banana?
[Race: Monkey]
...
Wait, what?
I completely ignored that part cause I thought it was a joke. But now that I see it...
I looked down at my body and I was covered in black coarse hair. My arms looked slightly longer from my legs, I had a tail, and I smelled like shit.
I'm... I'm...
[Yes... yes you are...]
"GOD DAMN IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I yelled in a monkey voice. And from that point, I lost all hope.
.
.
.