EVERY around in this university was filled their warm and cold voice. I was just listening the whole time performance without feeling on it.Yes! If it wasn't for Gael. I didn't here sitting and watching them singing on a big stage.It's just wasting of time for me. I don't know why everyone loves to watch them sing whenever they perform.
"Sabi ko sa'yo diba ang ganda ng mga kanta nila"natutuwang bulalas ni Gael habang naglalakad kami sa hallway palabas ng university.
"Hah!You wish" I said with matching turning my eyes on her.
"Wuy bruha! Ang ganda 'non hindi mo na-appreciate. Ang gaga mo"depensa nito sa akin.
I was ready to scolding her that I was not fun to watch them sing when someone call me from behind. I look around to see whose calling my name.
"Arlyn right"ani ng lalaking kumanta kanina sa may stage.
"Yes! How did you know me?"I asked innocently. Though, I know everybody knows me here, because I won a gold medal last year and my name just spreading around just like a virus.
"Your a gymnastic artist in this university. And your name keep spreading so who would thought to know that name. Precisely, all"ani nito na nakalabas ang dalawang malalim na biloy sa pisngi.
Shit!His dimples keep destructing me. Shit! Erase that! His nothing. I'm not attracted him. Suway ko sa aking sarili.
"Kenneth San Diego"pakilala nito sa sarili sa akin.
My devil side creeping me out.
"Who would said you will introduce your name to me?"nakataas kilay na sabi ko.
I didn't care if it was rude to kinda' talk to the person whose nice to me. I didn't care after all.
"Oh! Sorry. It just that, I was being nice to you"napakamot naman ito sa sariling buhok at nahiyang tumingin sa akin.
Umalis na rin ako sa harap nito ng makitang napahiya siya sa inasta ko.
Gael looking at me surprisingly.
"What?" I asked innocently
"Your a devil in ass Arlyn. How could you being rude to Kenneth when his being nice to you?How unpolite you are?"she said it and just rolled her eyes on me.
"I. don't. care. "I said it with emphasizing every words.
I smirk her and just flipped my hair and just continue walking like a model through in a parking lot.
Those past years that I choose my decision to end him. I felt like, I'm not the Arlyn before whose being nice to everyone probably a respectful one.Now, I'm the Arlyn whose being snob when someone approached me nicely.
I don't know why or maybe because I don't want any guy whose being nice to me. Only him that I want, but it is too impossible to happen that I want him back for me when I hurt him a years ago.
"Embo!" I whispered his name when I see him smile papalapit sa amin ni Gael. My heart beat go crazy when I see him but suddenly he's passing me like nothing.Like he didn't see me.
Niyakap nito ang babaeng kalalabas lang din sa may gate.
Maganda ang ipinalit niya at mas matangkad kaysa sa akin na hindi naman katangkaran.Bagay sila.
Shit! I'm jealous and the same time hurt.Why would I felt like this like hurt and jealous seeing him with another girl?Kung tutuusin nga ay wala akong karapatang masaktan at magselos dahil ako ang nang-iwan at ako ang nanakit.
I was staring at them walking while holding hands each others hanggang sa mawala ang bulto nilang dalawa sa paningin ko.
"Hey! Your crying?"Gael asking when she see my tears falling.She didn't know whats going on between me and the man I saw earlier but somehow she's so worried about me crying like that.
Umiling naman ako sa kanya at dali-daling pinahid ang mga luhang kumawala sa mga pisngi ko na hindi ko naman pala namalayan na tumulo na pala.
"Wala ito napuwing lang siguro ako"pagdadahilan ko at pumasok na sa kotse. Sumunod naman ito at umupo sa may passenger seat.
Habang nagmamaneho ako ay hindi ko maiwasang hindi isipin ang pangyayari kanina. Sa nakikita ko sa kanila. Ang masayang ngiti niya.Ang magkahawak kamay nilang dalawa. I fucking badly hurt. But one thing that caught my attention is why he is with another girl.Bakit hindi niya kasama?
I fucking choose those decision from her even if it's hurt. But what happen to him and her? Bakit iba ang kasama ni Embo? Nasaan siya ngayon?
Full of question in my mind and I really confused everything.
Gael didn't asked me everything inside the car when I cried silently. Yes! I fucking cried him while still driving. I fucking regret those decision I choose. I regret of letting him go. I regret everything.
"Is he the one why you change badly?"hindi na natiis ni Geal ang hindi magtanong sa akin ng ihinto ko ang kotse sa tapat ng Reyn's Bar. Alas tres ng hapon pero dito ang punta ko kasama si Gael. She didn't protest me why we here but she keep on asking me 'why and what'.
I stared at her with my swollen eyes.
"No"
"Then what. Arlyn I'm your gay bestfriend since then.I'm just really confused why you being like that. Mind you tell with me"ani nito na naguguluhan sa akin at hindi napigilang mapataas ang boses.
Nasa loob pa rin kami ng kotse dahil pinigilan niya akong wag bumaba dahil sa mga tanong na gusto niyang malaman. Lahat ng pangyayari. Lahat, simula una hanggang sa huli.Ang huli kung paano ko winasak at sinaktan ang taong mahal ko dahil lang sa lintik na desisyon na iyon.
"I broke up with him. I thought to myself that if I have a lots of boyfriends I forget him but my heart failed me"sabi ko sa kanya only a regret on my face is an understatement.
"Pero bakit mo naman hiniwalayan kung hanggang ngayon ay ito pa rin ang nagmamay-ari ng puso mo? Bakit Arlyn?"he asked to know more what happen between me and my Ex.
I told her everything. Sa simula kung paano naging kami hanggang sa mawasak sa huli dahil sa pinili ko ang desisyon na iyon.Pinili ko iyon para sa ikasasaya niya kapag nakuha niya si Embo sa akin. She's my fucking childhood bestfriend and she's to obsess to be with Embo but sadly Embo had no feelings for her, because Embo court me way back in our high school life that time.
She's my bestfriend, a little sister to me. I have no choice that time but to grant her wish.Kahit masakit na hiwalayan ang lalaking mahal na mahal ko ay ginawa ko pa rin dahil 'yun ang gusto niya.
I know it's a selfish decision dahil mas pinili ko ang kagustuhan ng bestfriend ko kaysa sa taong mahal ko.
And now I regret of my decision a year ago.
~Macey