That evening, Alexa was feeling particularly energetic and at the same time very low spirited. She was worried about how she would tell Earl about her true identity without taking the risk of losing him.
She wished she could create an identity for Ruth and live the double life both as Alexa and as Ruth then she'd date Earl freely without worrying about telling him the truth and everything would be all fine.
But then again she'd be living a lie. She'd be making someone else live and date a lie and that was unacceptable even for her. She wouldn't want others to lie to her and she definitely didn't want to do that to others as well since she knew how much it would hurt her and the other person.
The reason she chose this disguise in the first place was so that when she was out on the racing field, the others would treat her like anybody else and not like the daughter of a rich tycoon. It worked and she had to admit that she liked it.
