Cut to Ford Pines sleeping on the couch.
Cut to Ford's dream, where he appears in a field of wheat with a ruined swingset, universe portal, and the Stanowar around him.
Ford looks around as the wheat is flattened around him into the image of Bill Cipher, glowing blue.
Ford hears Bill's maniacal laughter.
Ford Pines "I know that laugh... Show yourself!"
(Turns around as Bill Cipher materializes from the ground, floating in the air)
Bill Cipher "Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well!"
(Cuts to multiple copies of Bill materializing as he talks, forming a ring around Ford)
"Aren't you a sight for sore eye!"
(All of the Bills mirror each other's movements)
"Stanford Filbrick Pines, my old pal!"
Ford "Bill Cipher. What do you want from me?"
Bill "Oh, quit playing dumb, IQ!"
(Another Bill talks:) "You knew I'd be back!"
(The Bill that's talking flicks Ford's nose)
" You think shutting down that portal could stop what I have planned?"
(All the Bills merge into one giant Bill that floats over Ford)
"I've been making deals, chatting with old friends, preparing for the big day! You can't keep that rift safe forever."
(Snaps his fingers and a copy of the dimensional rift appears in his hand)
"You'll slip up, and when you do...!"
(Throws the rift onto the ground, where it creates a massive portal in the shape of an upside-down triangle, burning the wheat field around Ford)
Ford "Get out of here! You have no dominion in our world!"
Bill "Maybe not right now, but things change, Stanford Pines!"
(Ford is reflected in Bill's eye as Bill ascends up into the portal) "Things... "
(Monster voice:) "change."
Bill laughs as he flies away, leaving Ford in the middle of the burning wheat field in the ring of fire.
Several images flash by at once, one of Ford's hand, one of Ford's eye, and another of what looks like an extended version of the Zodiac.
Ford wakes up in his bed, panting.
He adjusts his glasses.
Ford "I have to warn them!"
(Looks at his hand) "He's coming."
daytime.
Cut to Dipper opening a closet door and Mabel rubbing her hands excitedly.
I chuckle at the two sitting on the floor with a blue bracelet
The two look at the closet, which contains some stray items and board games.
Dipper Pines(Looks around the closet) "Alright, Grunkle Stan's gotta have some decent board games."
Mabel Pines "Let's see, 'Battlechutes & Ladderships,' 'Necronomiconopoly,' 'Don't Wake Stalin'...'
Dipper(Picks up a game)
"Hey, what's this? 'What Could Go Wrong?: The Board Game. The last players who opened this box never made it out alive."
Mabel(After a short pause) "Well, I know what we're doing today."
Dipper(Talking over Mabel:) "This should take up the next 21 minutes."
Ford(Off-screen:) "Family meeting! Family meeting!"
Me, Dipper and Mabel react to Ford's demand.
Cut to Stan Pines and another man, presumably named Santiago, standing in front of a truck outside the Mystery Shack. Stan is holding a wooden barrel of pugs.
Stan Pines "Alright, Santiago. You have 24 hours to get these pugs across the U.S. border."
Ford(in another room) "Family meeting! Family meeting!"
Stan(Gives Santiago the pugs) "No te preocupas! Vamos! Vamos!"
Cut to Me, Mabel and Dipper walking to Ford, who has several scrolls tucked under his arm and is reading a book.
Ford turns around and notices us, putting the scrolls on the table.
Ford "Ah, children. Come in, come in!"
Mabel(Takes a seat and looks at a bag on the table) "Ooh, mysterious scrolls and potions! Are you going to tell us we're finally of age to go to wizard school?"
(Starts rummaging through the bag) "Is there an owl in this bag?"
"That's a book series Mabel.."i say sweatdropping
Ford(Snatches the bag away) "No! I can assure you if there's an owl in this bag, he's long dead."
(Mabel frowns, disappointed)
"Now, children, do either of you recognize this symbol?"
(Holds up a scroll emblazoned with the image of Bill Cipher and several hieroglyphs)
Dipper and Mabel(Gasp)
I frown at the triangle man
Dipper "Bill."
Ford "You... you know him?"
Dipper "Know him? He's been terrorizing us all summer! I have so many questions and theories..."
Mabel "Dipper's been pretty paranoid since Bill turned him into a living sock puppet."
"The guy is powerful and dangerous, and i don't like him due to his chaotic evil out look"
Dipper "The important thing is we defeated him twice."
Mabel "Once with kittens and once with tickles!"
Dipper "It was a lot more heroic than it sounds."
"We used a portal out of the mindscape and dippers body's weaknesses"
Ford "The fact that you've dealt with Bill is gravely serious."
Dipper "So, how do you know Bill?"
Ford "I've encountered many dark beings in my time, Dipper. What matters is that his powers are growing stronger, and if he pulls off his plans, no one in this family will be safe!"
Dipper and Mabel(Gasps)
I scowl at this revelation
Ford "Fortunately, there should be a way to shield us from his mental tricks. A way to Bill-proof the Shack."
(Draws on a map of his lab)
"All I have to do is place moonstones here, here, and here, sprinkle some mercury, let's see... I always forget the last ingredient!"
(Takes out Journal 1 and flips through it)
"Ugh, unicorn hair."
Dipper "That's not, like, rare, is it?"
Ford "It's hopeless."
(Looks at Journal 1; adjusts his glasses)
"Unicorns reside deep within an enchanted glade, and their hairs can only be obtained by a pure good-hearted person who goes on a magical quest to find them."
Mabel(Screams) "Grunkle Ford, can I please go on this quest? I am literally obsessed with unicorns! My first word was "unicorn," I once made my own unicorn by taping a traffic cone to a horse's head."
(Cut to a photo that reads "BANNED FROM PETTING ZOO" and has a picture of Mabel near a disgruntled horse with duct tape and a traffic cone on its head)
"Are you even looking at the sweater I'm wearing right now?! Not to mention that I'm probably the most pure of heart person in this room."
Ford "That's true, she has a point."
Dipper(Talking over Ford:) " I can't argue there."
*Chuckle*
Mabel "So can I go on a mission to get that hair? Please please please? I'LL GIVE YOU MY BLOOD!"
Ford "Very well. But it won't be easy."
(Gives Mabel Journal 1)
"Take this."
(Hands Mabel a crossbow)
"And this."
Mabel "Oooh!"
Ford "I haven't been in this dimension for a while. It's okay to give children weapons, right?"
"Nope! But your still going to do it!"
Mabel "Pssh, come on, dawg."
(Fires the crossbow through the window, setting off Stan's car alarm)
Stan(Off-screen:) "AH! IT'S THE COPS! GUN IT!"
(Drives away accompanied by the sound of Pugs yapping)
Mabel(To phone:) "Candy, Grenda, Wendy, clear the afternoon! "
(Runs off)
Dipper "So, what are the odds she gets that hair?"
Ford "Unlikely. I've dealt with unicorns before, and if I had to describe them in one word it would be... frustrating"
Dipper "Lui?"
"She can do it.. but not the way she would like it."
Dipper "So, what are we gonna do about Bill?"
Ford "Follow me."
Dipper changes the sign on the Mystery Shack to "Closed."
Me, Dipper and Ford get into the elevator and get out onto the second floor.
Ford "Welcome to my private study, a place where I keep my most ancient and secret knowledge. Even Stan doesn't know about this place."
(As Dipper stops to investigate a rectangular object covered by a sheet)
"You two!, come along! If we can't Bill-proof the Shack, we're going to have to do the next best thing."
(Holds up a helmet with wires on it)
"We're gonna have to Bill-proof our minds."
Dipper(Gasps)
Cut to Mabel, Candy, Grenda and Wendy in the woods.
Mabel "It's nice to finally be out on a mission, just us gals!"
Grenda "Forget the gal talk! I'm here to meet, touch, and/or become a unicorn!"
Candy Chiu "I hear if you lick a unicorn's neck, it tastes like your favorite flavor in the world!"
Mabel "Candy, I will make sure you lick that unicorn's neck, because I care about my friends."
Wendy Corduroy "Honestly, I stopped believing in unicorns when I was like, five years old. I'm just coming along to keep you kids from walking into a bear trap."
Mabel "Stop! This is the magic part of the forest."
(Opens Journal 1)
"Let's see, the gnome tavern is over there, the fairy nail salon is over there, but it says that to summon the unicorn, one must bellow this ancient chant droned only by the deepest-voiced druids of old."
Grenda(Takes the journal) "On it! Oy-oyoy-oyoyoyoy...WendyI bet you ten bucks nothing happens."
Mabel "I'll take that bet."
Mabel and Wendy(Gasps)
A fortress rises out of the ground. Mabel, Candy, Grenda and Wendy enter it.
Mabel "The paintings airbrushed on the sides of vans were true!"
Celestabellebethabelle (Neighs)
Grenda "Mother of mothers!"
Candy "Queen of dreams!"
Wendy "No way."
Mabel(Reaches her hand up towards Wendy and makes a grabbing motion) "Eh, eh."
Wendy(Gives her a ten-dollar bill and sighs)
Cuts to the four girls looking at the unicorn while a faun plays a pan flute nearby. The unicorn rears her head.
Celestabellebethabelle "Hark! Visitors to my realm of enchantment"
!Both Mabel and Candy gasp, and while Grenda is doing the same thing a butterfly flies straight into her mouth, causing her to gag.
Mabel "Oh my gosh, oh my gosh! What's your name?"
Celestabellebethabelle "I am Celestabellebethabelle, last of my kind. Come in, come in. Just, take off your shoes. I have a whole thing about shoes."
Candy, Grenda and Mabel(Take off their shoes)
Celestabellebethabelle "Ah, ah! I'm talking to everyone!"
Wendy(Grudgingly takes off her shoes)
Mabel "Celestabellebethabelle, we have journeyed far and wide--"
Grenda "About an hour!"
Mabel "On a mission to protect our family with your magical hair!"
Candy(Standing next to Celestabellebethabelle) "This is your chance, Candy. Lick the neck. Lick it... "
(Tries to lick it but fails as Celestabellebethabelle stands her neck straight up)
Celestabellebethabelle "Very well. To receive a lock of my enchanted hair, step forth, girl of pure perfect heart."
Mabel "Presenting: bum buh da bum bum ba bum bum! (Kneels) Mabel!"
Celestabellebethabelle "What? You? A unicorn can see deep inside your heart, child."
(Points at Mabel with her horn and her chest glows with a heart)
Mabel "Ugh!"
(Covers her chest)
Celestabellebethabelle "And you have done wrong. WRONG I say!"
Mabel "I guess I do make fun of Dipper a lot. And I did just shatter a window with a crossbow."
Celestabellebethabelle "Your bad deeds make me cry."
(Her eyes well up, and a tear lands on a flower, killing it)
Mabel "NOOO!"
Celestabellebethabelle "Come back when you're PURE OF HEART. NEEEIIGGGHH! Exit is that way. Shoes, shoes, take your shoes. This isn't some... some... shoe store."
The humans leave and the gate closes.
Grenda "Hey, Mabel, don't let her get to you."
Wendy "Yeah, I wouldn't trust a horse that wears makeup."
Mabel "No, girls, she's right. I used to be one of the sweetest people I knew, but recently I've been slacking in the whole goodness department. Well, today we're gonna fix it. From this moment forth I'm gonna do so many good deeds, I'll have the purest heart in Gravity Falls!"
(Pumps fist in the air and accidentally punches a bird out of the air which opens Wendy's, Candy's, and Grenda's mouth as a form of minor shock for Mabel accidently punching that bird)
" That... that bird is fine."
Cut to Ford's lab. Ford hooks Dipper up to the mind machine.
Dipper "So what is Bill, exactly?"
Ford "No one knows for sure. Accounts differ of his true motivations and origins."
(While Ford is talking, Dipper picks up "The Cipher File" and starts reading it)
" I know he's older than our galaxy and far more twisted. Without a physical form, he can only project himself into our thoughts through the mindscape. That's why he wants this."
(Holds up interdimensional rift)
"I dismantled the portal, but with this tear, Bill still has a way into our reality. To get his hands on this rift, he would trick or possess anyone."
"I'm pretty sure he's a dream demon a level 50 out of 60 to be exact"i say while giving Ford a book of different levels
"They won't show any weakness sadly as it depends on what type bill is some type of cyclops of which I'm not sure"i say
"You know a lot"Ford says with suspicion
"Well i do have death as one of my best friends"i say
"I'm not going to ask.."Ford says
Dipper "So how do we keep Bill out of our minds?"
Ford "Well, there's a number of ways. I personally had a metal plate installed in my head."
Dipper "Heheh. Good one."
Ford(Knocks the side of his head, making a metallic sound)
Dipper(Coughs and clears his throat)
"That should work"i say with a nod
Ford "But this machine is safer. It will scan your mind, bioelectrically encrypting your thoughts so that Bill can't read them. (Turns it on) Now say hello to your thoughts."
Dipper(On machine:) "Oh, man, I can't believe I'm with the author. Is my fly down?"
(Singing:) "DISCO GIRL! COMING THROUGH!"
(Talking:) "Wendy. Or Lui. Wendy. Or Lui?."
(Speaking ) "You might wanna... ignore that last one."
I blush lightly but still a bit upset that he hasn't had his mind changed yet
" By the way, you never told me what your history with Bill was."
Ford "Both of you, do you trust me?"
"I do"
Dipper "Well, yeah, but-"
Ford "Then you'll trust that that's not important. Now, focus. It's time to strengthen your minds."
Cut to Candy, Grenda, Mabel and Wendy on the sidewalk.
Mabel "Alright, Mabel, it's time to strengthen your heart."
Montage: Mabel picks snails off the sidewalk and puts them on large grass. Mabel digs a hole and Grenda puts a tree in it. Toby Determined tries to come outside but the tree has blocked his door.
Mabel puts a giant smiley face sticker on Stan's face.
He screams and breaks his lamp in the process.
Mabel donates three pints of blood, then faints.
Mabel stops traffic for some ducks to cross,
paints glitter on the statue of Nathaniel Northwest,
fills Lazy Susan's tip jar, and she, Candy, Grenda, and Wendy help a woman with her groceries.
Singer(Over montage) Share a smile!
Dream a dream!
Doing some good deeds!
Share a smile!
Plant a tree!
Doing some good deeds!
Halt! And smile!
Love them tight!
Doing good deeds!
Mabel(Looking at a checklist of good deeds; spoken over Candy, Grenda and Wendy's cheering)
"Boom! A thousand good deeds. When that unicorn scans my heart, she's gonna say I'm absolutely, one hundred percent, bona fide-"
Cut to Celestabellebethabelle's fortress.
Celestabellebethabelle "Not pure of heart."
Mabel "Booyah! Wait, what?"
Wendy "How is that even possible? Mabel's a straight up saint, you judgmental hoofbag!"
Mabel "Please, tell me what I'm doing wrong!"
Celestabellebethabelle "Doing good deeds to make yourself look better isn't good at all. Not to mention you're crushing, like, ten dandelions right now. Those are basically children's dreams."
Mabel(Gets off the dandelions and gasps)
Celestabellebethabelle "I'm sorry, Mabel. It's not my fault you're a bad person."
Candy, Grenda and Wendy(Gasp)
Mabel(Runs off crying)
Wendy "Mabel, wait! Come back!"
Celestabellebethabelle "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a 3 o'clock posing in front of a rainbow."
(Poses in front of a rainbow)
"NeigheighEIGHEIGHeigheigh."
Cut to Mabel lying down outside. Candy, Grenda and Wendy walk up to her.
Wendy "Come on, Mabel. Don't beat yourself up about this."
Candy "Let's forget about getting that dumb unicorn hair."
Mabel "It's not about the hair anymore, guys. It's about me. Being kind and sweet is what makes me who I am. If I'm not a good person, who am I? I'm not leaving this spot until I think of a deed that makes me as good as Celestabellebethabelle."
Candy "But, Mabel..."
Mabel "Just leave me be."
Wendy "Pst."
(Ushers Candy and Grenda away)
"Guys, if you ask me, this whole thing is a serious load. Mabel's like the best person I've ever met. We tried getting that hair the good way. Now it's time we try... the Wendy way. "
(Wendy then punches and rubs her left fist against her right hand as a way of signaling a violent gesture)
Grenda "Are you suggesting violence? Sabotage?"
Candy "Mabel's not going to like that."
Wendy "Mabel doesn't need to know. Look, it's time we stop trying to be so "perfect" and be who we really are. We're crazed, angry, sweaty animals! We're not unicorns, we're WOMEN! AND WE TAKE WHAT WE WANT!"
(Punches a tree which brings a couple of leaves down to the ground)
Candy and Grenda "Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!"
Grenda(Smashes a rock on her head) "Too much?"
Wendy "Here's what we're gonna do."
Cut to Gnasty's.
Gnome"Get me a flaggon of your daintiest honeysuckle, please."
Bartender"I'm gonna need to see some ID."
Wendy(Kicks the door open)
Gnome 2 "It's the cops! Hit the deck! "
(Another Gnome flings himself out the window)
Wendy "I'm lookin' for someone who knows how to take down a unicorn! No tricks or games!"
Candy(Smashes a bottle)" We are human! We take what we want!"
Grenda "Yeah!"
Gnome 3"Fairy dust. A whole magic bag's enough to put a unicorn out cold. But if I do you a favor, you gotta do somethin' for me."
Grenda "Just, spill it, half-pint! ' (slams her fist against a tree stump)
Gnome 3 "Butterfly trafficking is illegal in this part of the forest, but I like butterflies. They tickle my face and make me laugh. Bring me a bag of butterflies and we got a deal."
Grenda and Wendy(Nod)Cut to a net grabbing a butterfly. Cut back to Gnasty's. Grenda approaches the gnome and gives him the bag of butterflies.
Gnome 3 "Two bags of fairy dust, just like we agreed."
Grenda "Where do you get this stuff?"
Gnome 3 "Everyone likes sausage, but no one likes to know how it's made."
Grenda "You disgust me."
Gnome 3 "You got your poison; I got mine; we made a deal.'
Grenda "Yeah, well, the deal is OFF!"
Several policemen gnomes run out of the bushes.
Policeman "Freeze! You're under arrest! Get down! Get down!"
Gnome 3"These butterflies aren't mine! I swear! I've been framed!"
Policeman "Tell it to the adorable owl we've dressed as a judge. (To Grenda:) My cut."
Grenda(Gives him one of the bags)
Cut to Mabel
.Mabel(Writing in her notepad) " Good deeds. Good deeds. Aww that's not good enough! Come on, Mabel, you can do better than that!"
Candy, Grenda and Wendy(Enter Celestabellebethabelle's house)
Celestabellebethabelle(Reading Whinny, Pray, Trot) "Oh sure, sure, I wish I could travel, but it's just not feasible in this economy- "
(Gets hit with the fairy dust) "What the hay?!"
(Faints)
Faun(Nervously plays S.O.S in morse code on pipes)
Grenda(Puts a towel over its mouth) "Sleep now! Sleeeeep"
. (Pulls the faun away as it loses consciousness)
Wendy(Takes scissors and some of Celestabellebethabelle's hair)
Mabel(Enters the fortress) "No wait! Stop!"
Wendy "Mabel! Shh! You'll wake her up!"
Mabel(Takes scissors) "But this is wrong, guys!"
Wendy"But protecting the Shack is good."
Celestabellebethabelle(Gets up and sees Mabel with the scissors) "What? Doth mine eyes deceive me? Thief! You shall never be pure of heeeaart!"
Mabel "No! You don't understand! I just want to be good like you!"
Blue unicorn(Offscreen:) " Whoa, whoa, whoa, you gotta be kidding me."
(Enters with the red unicorn) "Yo, C-beth, are you seriously pulling this "pure of heart" scam again?"
Red unicorn "That is messed up, man."
Mabel"Wait, scam?"
Red unicorn "Kid, unicorns can't see into your heart. All our dumb horns can do is glow, point towards the nearest rainbow and play rave music." (Plays music)
Blue unicorn "Yeah, the whole "pure of heart" racket is just a line we use to get humans to leave us alone."
Celestabellebethabelle "Guuuyys. Shut uuupp."
Mabel(Crushes notepad) "All this time. All this time I thought I was a bad person. But you're even worse than I am! "
(Throws the notepad with "Mabel's Sins" written on it to the ground)
Candy, Grenda and Wendy(Gasp)
Celestabellebethabelle "Okay, fine. So you learned our secret. We're jerks, okay? We have more hair than we know what to do with, and we keep it to ourselves just to tick humans off. (Mockingly:) What are you gonna do about it, huh, huh? What are ya gonna DO?"
Mabel(Punches Celestabellebethabelle)
Celestabellebethabelle "Oh!"
Candy, Grenda and Wendy(Gasp)
Wendy "WHOO! Go Mabel!"
Grenda "Join the dark side!"
Mabel(Growls and tears the unicorn image off of her sweater)
Candy, Grenda and Wendy "Fight! Fight! Fight!"
Celestabellebethabelle"Oh. So it's a fight you want. Well, then it's a fight you're gonna get!"
The humans and the unicorns run at each other.
Cut to Ford's lab, where a screen says "SCANNING THOUGHTS 15%."
we are only going to encript dippers thoughts because the helmet doesnt seem to work with me
Dipper "Ugh, this is taking forever. How long have I been doing this for?"
(Sees that Ford is asleep)
"Why does he have to be so mysterious about Bill? I can handle the truth."
"..."
(Thoughts on machine:) "I wonder what Great Uncle Ford is thinking. Use the machine! It'll show you his thoughts."
(Speaking:) "I shouldn't..."
"Dipper this isnt a toy"
(On machine:) " He won't know. He's going to tell you eventually. The more you know about Bill, the more you can help."
(Speaking:) "Man, I am really good at rationalizing."
(On machine:) "Yes, you are; yes, you are; yes, you are; yes, you are."
(Puts the helmet on Ford's head; speaking:) "Just a little peek. What are you hiding about Bill?"
"Dipper i hope you know what your doing..."
Bill appears on the screen, cackling. Screen changes to Stanford moving around in his sleep. Smaller screens show the portal and Fiddleford McGucket yelling at Ford.
McGucket "Where are these ideas coming from? Who are you working with?!"
Screens change to Ford writing "I'M LOSING," "MY MIND," and "TRUST NO ONE" in the journal.
Stan(Voice on machine:) "My brother is a dangerous know-it-all..."
Ford(On machine:) "He would trick or possess anyone..."
(As a young man:) "Then it's a deal. From now until the end of time."
Bill(Holding out hand, which is on fire) "Just let me into your mind, Stanford."
Ford>Please, call me... (Shaking hands) a friend."
Bill(Possessing Ford, cackling)
Dipper "FORD AND BILL?!" (Gasps)
"maybe its taken out of context?"
Ford(Stands up) "You shouldn't have done that."
(Takes off helmet and throws it, knocking down a curtain, revealing many items depicting Bill)
Dipper"Why- why were you shaking hands with Bill?"
(Picks up interdimensional rift)
" You said Bill could possess anyone so he could get this."
(The rift slips out of his hand, and he catches it)
" Ahh!"
Ford "Careful! Hand me the rift! Now, boy!"
I grit my teeth at him making sure to be infront of dipper at all times but making sure dipper can actually see whats going on
i pull out my knife standing in a defensive position
Dipper(Backing away) "Why were you really scanning my thoughts?" (Aims memory erasing gun at Ford over my shoulder) "Are you Bill right now?!"
Ford "Now just-just calm down, P-"
Dipper(scared) "PINE TREE?! IS THAT WHAT YOU WERE GONNA CALL ME?!"
i aim at ford
Ford "I was just going to say "please", kid!"
Dipper(Stops at the end of the room) "Great Uncle Ford told me to protect the rift! Get one step closer and I'll shoot! I'll erase you right out of Ford's head!"
"one step closer and it wont be just a gun pointed at you!"
Ford"It's me, Dipper. It's your uncle! Lui, you should know"
Dipper(Charging gun) "Trust no one, trust no one, trust..."
i go to hit ford
Ford "Hand it to me!"
The gun fires at Ford, but bounces off his glasses and around the room pushing me back infront of dipper befotre i can manage to hit ford, finally destroying one of the screens.
Dipper(Tries to pick up the memory erasing gun)
Ford(Picks me and Dipper up before he can get the gun)
Dipper(Trying to hit him) " Let go of me!"
"let go of us before i scope your eye out you Dream Demon!"
Ford "Now-now just calm down. Calm down! "adjusts his glasses) "Look into my eyes! Look at my pupils. It's me, you two. It's me." (Sets us down)
Dipper(Sighs) "I tried to erase your mind. I'm so sorry."
"sorry for trying to stab you..."
Ford "It's okay, Dipper. Besides, my mind can't be erased, anyway, remember?"(Knocks the side of his head)
" and Lui you didnt hit me so your alright"
"If I really was Bill, though, you would've done great. I should of been more like you when I was young. I was a fool to try to hide all this. The reason I've been trying to prepare you for Bill's tricks is that Bill tricked me. It's the biggest regret of my life. Bill wasn't always my enemy. I used to think he was my friend. Long, long ago. "
(Flashback to Ford as a young man in front of a printer)" I had hit a road block in my investigation of Gravity Falls."
(Punches the drawing of the question mark he had made on his chalkboard; cut to him in a cave)
" Until I found some mysterious writing in a cave. Ancient incantations about a being with answers. It warned me not to read them, but I was desperate. I read the inscription aloud. But nothing happened. Until later that afternoon, when I had the most peculiar dream."
(Ford is sleeping under a tree. The knots on the trees become Bill eyes and the rest of the backround fades into abstraction. Journals and pages are floating about randomly. Ford gets up and walks around.)
Bill(Comes up behind him) "Hiya, smart guy!"
(Circles around him) "Woah, don't have a heart attack, you're not 92 yet."
Ford(In flashback) "Who are you?'
Bill "Name's Bill! And your name's Stanford Pines, the man who changed the world, but I'm getting ahead of ourselves; let's relax! Care for a game of interdimensional chess? "(Chessboard appears)
" Have a cup of tea." (Teapot pours tea into a teacup)
Ford(Voice-over from the present:) "He told me he was a muse. That he chose one brilliant mind a century to inspire. What a fool I was. Blinded by his flattery and games. He became my research assistant. He was free to move in and out of my mind as he pleased. "
(Cut to Ford summoning Bill, who possesses him.) " We were partners."
(Cut to Ford and Bill in the mindscape, doing an equation with a picture of the Universe portal next to it) "When he told me I could complete my research by building a gateway to other worlds, I trusted him. He said this was the way genius happened. Little help from a friend."
(Cut to Ford and McGucket in front of the portal)" It seems that I was on the verge of my greatest achievement!"
(The portal activates; cut to Ford with McGucket, who is unconscious) "Until my partner got a glimpse of Bill's true plans."
(Cut to Ford approaching Bill) "Bill! You lied to me! Where does that portal really lead?"
Bill(Looking at what looks like a scar in space with dark shapes in it)" Hoho! Looks like Mr. Brainiac finally got smart! Let's just say that when that portal finishes charging up, your dimension is gonna learn how to party! "
(To the scar:) "Right, guys?"
Roaring and cackling is heard from the scar.
Ford "No! I'll stop you! I'll SHUT IT DOWN!"
Bill "A deal's a deal, Sixer! You can't stop a bridge between our worlds from coming, but it would be fun to watch you try! Cute even!"
Ford(Wakes up, shocked) " I'd been betrayed. I shut the portal down, "(Cut to Ford shutting the portal down) "severing the link between Bill's world and ours. I had to hide my instructions so no one could ever finish Bill's work."
(Cut to the present)" Bill's been waiting for the gateway to reopen ever since. All he needs to do is get his hands on this rift. To Bill, it's just a game, but to us, it would mean the end of our world".
Dipper "Oh, man."
Ford "Oh, man, indeed."
"that sucks"
Cut to Dipper and Ford in the living room drinking Pitt Colab and im drinking pepsi.
Dipper "Ugh, I'm so embarrassed about earlier. I'm such an idiot."
"tell me about it"
Ford "From now on, no more secrets between us. We're not the first three idiots to be tricked by Bill, boys. But if we work together, we could be the last."
'wait i wasnt tricked though?'
Dipper "But what about Bill? we broke the machine! Now we have no way to protect the shack!"
Mabel(Slams the unicorn hair on the table) "Did someone say "unicorn hair"?!"
Candy, Grenda, Mabel and Wendy are behind her. They are all beat up and covered in unicorn fluids and tears.
Dipper "Uh, no, actually?"
"nope!"
Mabel "Oh. That would have been perfect. Either way we got some unicorn hair!" (Waves it in Dipper's face)
Candy "Also some unicorn tears, unicorn eyelashes..."
(Gestures to Grenda, who has unicorn eyelashes)
Grenda "They finally gave us this treasure just to get rid of us! " (Dumps treasure on table)
Ford "It... can't be! This is a great day, girls! With this unicorn hair, we should be able to completely shield the shack from Bill's mind-reading tricks!"
Mabel "Is it okay?"
Ford "Better than okay; it's perfect! You've protected your family. You're a good person, Mabel."
Mabel "Thanks, Grunkle Ford, but today I learned that morality is relative.
Stan(Runs in and grabs the treasure) "MONEY!! "(Runs away)
i burst out laughing
me, Dipper and Ford are in the yard.
Dipper finishes stretching the unicorn hair around the shack. A force field forms around the shack
.Ford "Perfect! This will protect us from Bill! As long as we're inside, our minds are safe"
.Bill(Watching them from the mindscape) "I guess I can't possess anyone inside the shack, so I'll just have to find my next pawn on the (Voice gets lower:) OUTSIDE." (Eye flashes between several characters)