Five hours after Tony came back, Pepper watched him sleep.
It had taken a moment for her to garner the courage to touch him properly—to put her palm against his cheek, to brush strands of hair out of his eyes, to hold his hand, to squeeze it—without fearing that he'd crumble into dust the same way her assistant did right when the Decimation happened.
But she had managed to touch him in the end.
It was his feet that she touched first as she stood over the foot of his bed with Rhodey sitting on the chair beside Tony. It seemed to Pepper that his feet felt awfully cold despite being covered in a blanket, reminding her not only of the fact that he spent 22 days in the vast, cold space where stars resided, but also of just how close to death's door he was.
He was gaunt and pale too, no doubt from the dehydration and starvation. There was an IV on his arm, his skin was almost see-through and yet the doctors had difficulty finding a suitable vein to stick a needle into. His arms were almost the same size as her own.
At that thought, Pepper's hands left Tony's feet and went up around her arms, hugging herself for a semblance of comfort.
Rhodey looked up at the movement and rose. He came over to Pepper, draped an arm around her back, and instantly Pepper buried her face against his chest.
He was home. He was alive but, oh, God, at what cost?
Her entire body shook as she finally cried, tears of relief and joy spilling out of her. Rhodey kept his hand on her back, rubbing it as she allowed herself to weep—something she had refused to do until now… until Tony returned to her.
Later, when Rhodey and the others who came to visit had gone, she sat on the chair beside Tony's bed and continued her vigil.
…
The wait was incredibly long. Rhodey and Bruce came at around 3 in the morning, telling her to get some rest while they took over the watch. It wasn't really needed since FRIDAY was watching Tony and there were nurses on-call, but they thought she'd feel better if they were around.
But Pepper shook her head, holding on to Tony's hand. "I want to be here when he wakes up." I want to make sure this isn't a dream, she thought.
"We'll call you when he does, Pepper," Bruce offered.
Pepper gripped Tony's hand tighter, afraid he'll disappear or she will. She fixed his gaze on him. She bit back the desire to say that the last time she left him with Bruce, Tony had ended up in space.
She settled for "No, I can't. I won't… I have clothes here. I'm staying."
Rhodey took Bruce's arm and shook his head subtly.
Pepper heard them leave the room. It was only then that she let go of the breath she held and the hand she gripped like a lifeline.
…
Nebula came some time later, when she thought Pepper was asleep. But Pepper didn't sleep. Not really. She lay on the cot beside Tony's bed, listening to the heart monitor go, listening to Tony's breathing.
Nebula didn't say anything. She simply stood at a corner and watched.
Pepper found her presence comforting, a balm. Nebula brought Tony back alive, fixed his wound, even gave him her share of what meager provisions they had on board the ship.
She would make sure nothing happened to Tony… and slowly Pepper succumbed to sleep.
…
On the twenty-third day since Thanos attacked, Tony woke up, eyes wild at his new surroundings. Pepper jolted awake at the sound of the heart rate monitor. Not sparing a moment to even feel relief that Tony had finally opened his eyes, she flew out of her seat and grabbed Tony's hands, calming him.
"Tony! You're back. You're safe. You're on Earth. You're safe!" His heart was still racing but his eyes had settled on hers and she fought back tears as she continued, "You're in the compound. Carol saved you, brought the ship back here. It's only been a day since you came back. This is real. I'm real." She pressed his hand to her chest. "This isn't a dream."
Hurried footsteps came and Pepper looked over her shoulder to see the remaining Avengers watching from the glass. She shot them a look; Tony didn't need them watching like he was in an aquarium. Thankfully, Rhodey herded them all away, leaving only Happy standing outside.
Pepper helped Tony sit up, his limbs shaking as he strained. She moved to fix his blanket but he caught her hand and Pepper froze.
She turned to face him, hand going to his cheek. He needed a shave but that could wait.
Tony turned his head, his dry lips catching her wrist and planting a kiss there. Her hand moved to his chest.
"We are getting married as soon as you're back on your feet," she said to him, half-kidding, half not.
Tony nodded curtly and then swallowed. "No more decoy dates?" he whispered, his voice a little hoarse.
Pepper shook her head. "And you'll wear the proper suit this time."
He had the audacity to grin and say, "Can it still be red and gold, though?"
Pepper snorted a laugh and kissed his temple in reply.
…
It didn't take long for Tony to begin complaining about being stuck in a bed and eating "crappy food." In fact, it only took about an hour.
His voice had returned to its normal state and he made sure everyone knew it by begging anybody who came to see him for a cheeseburger.
Pepper had gotten out of the bathroom just in time to hear Happy tell Tony, "You're not the boss of me. She's the boss of me. Pepper, tell Tony he's not the boss of me."
She rolled her eyes good-naturedly at the two. It was nice to see the two of them back to snapping at each other.
"I emailed everyone in this compound a list of things you're allowed to eat. Cheese, burger, and cheeseburger are not on the list."
Tony cursed under his breath. "Then tell me you got something in store for me. I'm sick of being stuck on this bed watching Downton Abbey reruns."
Happy gasped at the insult.
Taking her bag and giving Tony a kiss, Pepper said, "I know you just got back but there's something I need to do at the office. I'll be back in a few hours. If you're good, Nat can take you on a wheelchair ride."
Tony grumbled something under his breath.
Pepper raised a brow. "What was that?"
"Nothing. I love you. Bye, bye."
"I thought so. I love you. Bye!"
Pepper left the room with Hogan yelling a quick teasing "I love you too," to Tony.
…
"So, it's… It's really true, Miss Potts?" Mandy was a timid, shy little thing. With good reason. She was a new hire, barely 6 months on the job when Pepper had plucked her out of administration to become her new assistant. She never would have guessed she'd end up directly working for the CEO of Stark Industries… then again, she never expected all her bosses to vanish either.
She clutched at the sheet of paper in her hands, a memo to be filed in the room where all hard copies were filed. A memo that said superhero Tony Stark had returned and was in recovery, a memo that brought not only news, but hope along with it.
If anyone could stop this nightmare, it'd be Iron Man… right?
The acting COO stood grim-faced beside the shaking assistant. "He's going to fix this, right? Now that he's back?"
"Are they going to get the son-of-a-bitch that did it?" asked the CFO.
Pepper sighed, rising to her feet. "Mr. Stark is alive and currently on bed rest. If anyone asks, we are thankful and relieved that he has returned. In the meantime, we should focus on our pending projects, the funerals being on the topmost list."
Knowing a dismissal when they heard one, they all nodded and exited the office.
Pepper sat back down, shoulders hunched as she stared at the screen in front of her. Names. Numerous names to remember, to send letters to. Hundreds of employees gone, hundreds more with vanished family members and Stark Industries would take care of their funeral arrangements as stated in their employment contracts.
Hundreds…
She was lucky her own family was left untouched, still whole.
She shook her head and squared her shoulders. Time to get back to work.
...
She had only just gotten back to the compound when FRIDAY when FRIDAY alerted her that the boss had collapsed in a meeting.
"Damn it, Tony," Pepper cursed, hurrying to the elevator and punching the floor of his room. "Is he okay?"
"He's stable for now, Miss Potts."
For now.
"God, Tony."
She wasn't even gone for a whole day and he had managed to overexert himself. Or the team had. Oh, who was she kidding? Tony had probably done it to himself.
Sending curses their way, she hurried down to her parking spot and drove as quickly as she could back to the compound.
…
"I'm not sorry," was the first thing Tony said to her when he finally woke up again. "He deserved it. They all did."
Pepper agreed but she wasn't going to tell him that.
Years of pain and resentment bottled up had finally been released in one tense moment. No wonder his body couldn't take it.
She also knew that Tony didn't mean it. Or maybe he did at that moment, but Pepper knew he loved his team. He was acting like a brother who was mad at his siblings but loved them still.
Pepper folded her arms. "You're mad, I get that, but—"
"I'm not mad," snapped Tony, visibly shaking in anger. "I'm furious! This all could have been avoided if they—" He broke off, chest rising up and down as he tried to catch the breath he'd only just recovered.
Pepper's hands flew to his arm, rubbing comforting circles on the dry skin there. "Breathe, just breathe. Slowly."
"Telling me to breathe doesn't really help me breathe!" he gasped but tried nonetheless.
The grimace on his face told Pepper he hated being this weak, not when he still had so much anger inside, so much pain that needed to be let out.
When he had his breathing under control, Pepper let him drink from his cup and then said, "As soon as you're better, I'm getting you out of here. I promise."
Tony grasped her hand, clutching at it tightly. There was nothing that he wanted more than that.
"I promise," Pepper repeated.