You know what's crazy? Finding out you own a town. You know what's more crazy?! Finding out your grandmother left it to you. Yup, that's what's happening to me right now. I've asked the lawyer several times to repeat it. Every time he reiterates it I still can't wrap my head around it.
"So let me get this straight. My grandmother owns a town in western Oklahoma and she's owned it for 60 years?!" The lawyer just nods. "I know nothing about owning a town. Why would she do that? She knows how neurotic I am. There's got to be a mistake." I'm hyperventilating.
"Auburn I know this is a lot to take in but I've been your grandmother's attorney for the last 30 years and she was of sound mind." I snort. "She left you everything you need to know." He slides a rather impressive envelope and I watch it fall to the floor. Mr. lawyer stands up and walks over to pick it up. "I can assure you this will answer all your questions." He hands it to me while gesturing towards the door. Obviously he's done with this conversation. "Go have a drink. Get yourself in a good head space and look this over. Call me if you have any questions." He's really pushing me out the door. I sigh. Time to get a drink.
"Oh my God. you can't be serious!" My best friend Tia is laughing so hard I think she's going to fall off the bar stool. As she wipes the tears from her eyes shd flags the bartender for two more shots. Tia and I have been besties since high school. Of course, we're complete opposites which I guess is why this works. She's outgoing, tall, dark brown wavy hair, whiskey colored eyes and attracts attention everywhere she goes. I'm short like 5'1" with brownish red hair and hazel eyes. Unfortunately, I've yet to lose the 100 pounds or so from giving birth to identical twin sons four years ago and the only attention I attract is a "bless her heart" type.
Tia downs her shot. "Aubs, I've got to pee." She takes off to the bathroom and I drop my head to the bar. My phone dings I have a text message from the babysitter.
Rachel: Kellen and Colton are fighting again
Me: yup. that's what boys do
Rachel: I know but this time Colton knocked Kellen's tooth out.
Me: Shit. I'm on my way.
Tia returns with several guys in tow.
"hey look what I found. They want to take us to dinner." The guys clearly don't mean me. I tell her about the boys. "well guys it was nice to meet you but I've got to go." They give her a whatever and we head home to chaos.