It's been a day since I cursed the pygmies. I've noticed that I don't have a good way of keeping track of time so I named today day 1 year 1 age of the curse. It sounds ominous but it's the most significant thing I've done and it can serve as reference.
I think.
I walk over to the pits, they're about 10 meters deep and cover some 200sqM each. They look like giant pools that have about 20% of their space flooded with my new monsters. Their population varies because I use them for all sorts of things. Sometimes I feed them to my followers, when I'm feeling too cranky I just throw them at the hungry sundews that haven't eaten. I wanted their increase in strength to go by faster, so I asked the wolves to collect as many animals as they could so I could throw them into the rat pit and see if over-feeding works. I also shook a few mew berry trees impatiently so I could throw the fruit into the horned rabbit pit.
I estimate I will take at least a month for the strongest rabbits and rats to be fit for combat. I'll need to wait even longer if I want them to breed before they fight so it should be about 3 months before my followers leveling starts in earnest. For now my wolves to fight any other wolves they come across. I told my bear beasts to fight the biggest animal they found every day. They shouldn't have a problem considering how powerful they are.
I finished with the monster pits and walk over to what I like to call the blessed lands. An entire area I infused with my powers of mana and evolution to try to promote the growth of the nearby animals. I can see many of the insects are larger than they are in the surroundings. The deer I evolved also hang around here. It looks like they don't like straying too far from this place.
It makes sense that monsters better attuned to magic would like to stay near resources that are also magical. When I'm really powerful I'll evolve the deepest part of the forest a few times and see how it changes. I feel like it would be more efficient than evolving monster by individually and by groups like I'm doing right now. But the return would be over a longer period of time. I want to wait for my followers to at least interact as tribes and have the place we plan to settle before doing so.
Its midday right now but I can't quite get in the mood to do anything really. I guess I can't really keep cursing a race off my mind. There are two things that really bother me about all of this. First is that primal anger I felt. It didn't feel like I was in control. It felt like something foreign in my personality took control over everything and acted without my say so. Being controlled is scary and honestly I'm not down for that. I feel like I need to find out what ticked me off the most to trigger that reaction but it feels like my own mind prevents me from looking into it.
The second thing that bothers me is the fact that I don't really care about the fact that I cursed that entire tribe and most likely their entire race to forever try to rape and pillage. I mean the curse is incredibly malicious. They will keep raping and pillaging everything they can until they meet with a foe that will annihilate them. That isn't something I'd come up with for a curse. I would probably curse them to remain forever flaccid and the curse would end with that generation. That kind of vicious creativity isn't mine.
Don't get me wrong while most of my memories from Earth are hazy at best I know I wasn't a bad guy. Like I was never a saint but I wasn't some sociopathic sadist. Ugh. Those gods either messed with my mind when they gave me my powers or this new body just lacks empathy by a lot.
The only good part is it doesn't make me a complete sadist. Like I don't feel a want or need to cause pain but I don't mind if I do. While I want to build a good relationship with Kumo I feel like it's only because I subconsciously see her as an equal. As for the rest of my followers as much as I try to care about them as my people every time I think about them only one word comes to mind: property.
I don't feel any personal attachment to any of them. I can tell that if one of them died I'd get pretty mad but I know it's a feeling of someone breaking my toy and not a feeling of losing someone close.
Do I feel like this because they look like beasts? It must be.
I don't care about them because I don't see them as people then! I'll probably feel good about them once I evolve them a few times.
"Hey Kumo, what are you doing right now?" I ask her as I break out of my thoughts.
"I am waiting for your orders my lord." She answers with a tone too serious for my liking. Guess I'll start my work on making her more casual with me. I have put it off for far too long, and I'm feeling especially lonely right now. I'll try a few guiding questions.
"Do you always have to be so formal with me? Formality can sometimes be interpreted as distance."
"My lord it is my duty as a servant and privilege as your champion to address you at all, therefore I must speak with utmost formality when I get the opportunity to do so."
"I know that's how you feel Kumo but pretty soon I will have many servants with that mindset. I didn't want you to serve. I wanted you to fill a missing position that I have on this planet and it's definitely not a servant."
She stares at me stunned. It's obvious she's giving serious thought to what I just said so I'll leave it at that for now. Shit like this is all about timing. You go for too dynamic of a shift too fast it will feel artificial and it will be hard to get out of that rut. I can take my time. I'll go over to my room in my artificial cave.
There are only a few holes to surface to let in some light and air. Even though I can see in complete darkness and don't particularly need to breathe my followers do, so I just put it in because it makes no difference to me so far. I walk past the decently sized hallway into my room. I lay down on my earth mattress covered with soft rabbit pelts to sleep on everything I thought for the day. Let's sleep for a week and then check on everything. Yep a week should be a good timeframe.
---Kumo POV---
I don't completely understand what my lord has told me.
What is my purpose for him if it is not a servant? While I can't understand what he means right now, Lord Obyrith is never wrong. In the infinite divine wisdom he has shown me ever since we were connected through his power he has never guided me astray. He broadened my horizons when I used to think about my cave and the insects I ate as my purpose in life.
Now I know there is an entire world filled with curiosities, adventures, and any number of things. But most of all it is filled with enemies. While I can't feel their presence because of the distance I have seen the conversation my Lord had with the greater being. I need to get stronger to protect and serve my lord and prevent those other so called gods from harming him.
But how would I do that if it isn't as a servant. Does he wish for me to see him as an equal? Impossible! He is a divine being born from the will many ancient deities, while I am nothing but an insignificant insect that was lucky enough to be noticed by my lord. It is logical that I am distant from my lord after all there is quite a lot of distance between us.
I am flawed and he is perfect. I am impure and he is divine. I am limited while he is absolute. I cannot disappoint my lord for he is the will of the world.
I will take some time to meditate and interpret his wisdom for everything my lord desires and expects of me must be executed perfectly. There is no room for any error in understanding his divine will. For his divine will is the reason for my continued existence. To show him my resolve his will… I. WILL. ACCOMPLISH.