I was very, very confused. I even thought that it was another one of my dad's pranks!
"Dad, what are you sayin-"
"Do you not like him?" my dad asked me.
"I like him, but-"
"Good, then. Johann, take care of our girl," dad continued, "This conversation's over." and he faced Mr. Williams and mom to continue their chat.
But what I meant was, I liked him as a friend.
I looked at Johann and raised my eyebrows.
"Don't look at me like that. I don't know what's happening," Johann shrugged. But then I saw him smirk.
"I saw that smug face… Do you know something about it? Don't deny..." I said, nagging him to tell me the truth.
"Okay, since you're my girlfriend now," Johann quickly took the last piece of fried chicken from my plate!
"Hey! That's mine!" I shouted, staring intently at him like I was very mad, and he just chuckled; he enjoyed seeing my angry face.
He was always like that, teasing me, mocking me, but when I got sad, he was there to lighten my mood. He was there to lend his stiff shoulder. He even let me borrow his baseball cap whenever I wanted to hide my face.
Johann was the perfect best friend, and at times I wondered if he would be a perfect boyfriend, too.
Our sudden, next level relationship became our little secret. I didn't want to be the talk of the school, and since Johann is somewhat famous, girls might look daggers at me or attempt to mess up with my life.
Johann didn't change his treatment towards me; he's still the same funny yet caring best pal that I knew. And because of that, even though our relationship had a boyfriend-girlfriend label, we didn't feel awkward.
In the middle of our third year high school days, I got close with my Chemistry Class groupmates, Hammy Peterson and Katie Brussels. They were very jolly girls, and soon after, Johann and I, plus the two of them, became very close as weeks passed by.
One time, we all went to the karaoke center. After five songs, we had our dine-in dinner there, and we talked about ourselves. Hammy was talking about how she and her boyfriend from another school met, and how sweet he was, bringing chocolates and flowers to her house every night.
On the other hand, Katie talked about how she caught her ex-boyfriend toying with her. She said that she heard him talk on the phone with a girl and they exchanged a sweet conversation. She shared to us that she even promised herself that she wouldn't ever fall in love again.
After their turn, they faced me and asked how my lovelife was. I glanced at Johann, and he just chuckled, relying on my decision if I wanted them to know about our odd relationship.
And because I wasn't proud of it and everything was just our parents' decision, I lied to them, saying I didn't have a boyfriend.
When it was Johann's turn, he said, "I have a girlfriend, but she wanted to keep our relationship a secret."
To be honest, I was embarrassed, so right after that, I placed in a rock song and I sang out loud!
Eight in the evening, we parted ways with smiles on our faces. I was even excited to go to karaoke the following week again.
Johann and I talked about it on our way back home. When we reached our neighborhood, there were a few people on the streets and the yellow street lights illuminated the way.
"The karaoke's so fun! I want to do it everyday," I told Johann.
He laughed at me and replied, "If we're rich, yes, why not? Unfortunately, we're both broke!"
Our laughter brought life to the quiet street. He then told me that he wanted to talk to me about something. I told him that we can talk about it the next day. After that, everything we talked about was just random things, but what surprised me was…
Johann suddenly held my hand.
"Hey… Someone might see," I told him while I was slightly panicking.
"Buns, we should just expose our relationship. Why are you so set on keeping it a secret?" he asked me in a serious tone. "Is it… is it because you still like Justin?"
I stopped walking. I never had the intention of exposing our odd boyfriend-girlfriend relationship because I like someone else. I glared at him, and instead of staying calm, I shoved his hand and pushed him away, then I yelled, "Yeah, you're right. I like him. I still like Justin!"
Johann looked dejected. I felt weird at that time because I wondered why he acted that way and why he asked that question, even though he already knew the answer.
"Uhh… you didn't have to push me away," Johann said when he looked away. "Let's go. I'll take you home."
The awkward silence was deafening, and even though we were the only ones left in the street, we were a little far away from each other.
When we finally reached my house, he smiled at me like I didn't push him away, but there was sadness in his eyes.
He uttered, "Goodnight, Buns."
"Hmm. Goodnight," I replied. Not wanting to further talk to him, I turned my back on him.
"Buns, see you… someday."
I ruined that day. I really did. And now I regretted it. I wished I never pushed him away.
And I wish I looked back at him and asked him what he meant.
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