Chapter 9 - I am not a naive

The boy in the family. His black hair reminds me of the endless hell, and I'm getting closer even if that wasn't my goal, but his sister.

Without listening to my footsteps I sit on the edge of the wooden object and look at the sea while he turns his attention to me. He's surprised, but he quickly turns his gaze back to the bottom. The sun begins to fall slowly, slowly and gives way to the silver moon.

<> his soft voice breaks the cold in me for a while and I quickly place the familiar mask. A fake smile. But I'm not looking at him.

<< I wanted to walk.>>

<< Good then go and walk>> He's kicking me out like he knows my plans right now, but I'm not giving up. He's just a pawn in this revenge. I'm going to flatten him like the rest of them. So I'm going to let him start by thinking he's in control.

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<> And he gets up without taking one last look at me. Turns out it's harder than I thought. He has a tendency to drive away those who try to get close to him, and it's going to take me longer than the rest of them.

I puff as I continue to gaze at the wonderful sea and Jason's back as he moves further and further away from my place. I'm zip-up the jacket more so I can prevent the cold air from getting into my marrow, and without extending it any further, I just get up off the bench.

And unfortunately for me, a memory is running out in my head, coming back five years.

<> Mother's voice forces me to run faster by tearing the golden balls of sand. My sports are filled with dust, but I don't pay attention, I still move as hastily as possible, with my laughter echoing across the board.

<> I'm supposedly threatened by my father, and I keep running until I gasp and his hands roll around my waist, lifting me off the ground.

<> I try to speak through my constant laughter when mother's fingers tickle my ribs, incessantly.

<< Don't run away from us.>> She scolds me the moment father leaves me in the sand again to look at him tenderly and with plenty of nazi.

<> I nerve-wrap my hands under my chest and face when mother puts me in her arms.

<< Don't rush to part with us, baby.>> these are her last words as we now make our way home.

Right now, if I could live it a second time, I'd change my words. I shouldn't want to walk away from their side. Because now that I need them, they're not with me. They're not around me to live my life the way I should. I'd study, I'd have friends, I'd be completely different. However, all that matters in my miserable life is this revenge that I will receive the world turn upside down.

I know that all the moments I've lived with my parents will remain as a figment of my imagination. I know very well that every day I face this family, I will germinate for the oath I made. They say hate doesn't destroy the opponent more than you do yourself. I'm not naïve, I'm not a dreamer. I know very well that I will be destroyed, but the difference is that I have nothing to lose at all. I'm going down with them, and I don't care.

There are a lot of negative, destructive feelings and my parents may not be really proud of the path I've taken, but the only reason I've turned into so ruthless is Peter and the killer. These two are going to regret the time and the moment they messed with my family. I think if they wanted to do their job, they should have cleaned me up that night. If I had been taken out of the equation, I couldn't claim what I lost. My parents' precious life.

I know most people would mess with me. Maybe they'd mock me for all the knitting I've created. Maybe these are good, maybe my surroundings are people who don't embrace the regular eye for an eye. But I'm not like that. I'll be the nemesis of Peter and his family. Because he's entitled to see his loved ones fall one by one like towers of cards.

So with the thoughts torturing me, I begin to leave the beautiful sea, staring more and more at its wild waves. It's like it's angry, like is in agreement with the rage that's eating my guts. It foams, pours into the rocks and the shore, then sucks back towards the seabed and repeats this process without stopping.

My feet move me towards the alley I followed and I notice the enclosure of the huge villa. From a distance it looks so big, so imposing. It dominates all the surrounding area, but I know the foundations are rotten. Because their hearts are dirty, drenched in sin.

I'm getting closer to the yard, and I'm going around, see if I can find out Jason's secret passage. Because I think it will be of use to me in the near future, and I must also be aware of all their escapes in order to have direct contact with them. I have to do everything I can to get closer to him. He's the hardest man in this family, and it makes me angry.