I have always hated my fair complexion. Makes me feel like an outsider. All the other girls in the kingdom have healthy olive skins, a sign of good health and virility.
I on the other hand have been cursed with this pale and fair skin. I look sickly and if I were a man, I would never choose to marry me. May be that is the reason I have never been courted.
Men like women who can bear them sons. I am certain of it!
And I look like I can't even take care of myself. Let alone birth an army of sons. The gods must have run out of colour when they were making me!
Alas, I can't do much to change what I look like. Baba works in dark corners of caves and always needs my help through the tedious art of sculpting. Sometimes days go by before I even see the sun. I wonder why he named me Apsara...I don't think I am beautiful at all!
'Apsaraaaaa! O Apsara!'
Here he comes. Baba always call me this way when he wakes up, especially when he is inspired by a new idea that he wants to immortalize in stone.
Sometimes it bothers me that all he can think about is his sculptures. He can talk at length about those gigantic murals he is making at Ellora.
If I wasn't around to force feed him and push him to get some sleep every night, he would work himself to his death.
'Apsara?!'
Oh gods, must be something urgent!
'Coming Baba!' I shout at the top of my lungs and rush into his room with a bowl of water and a towel.
'Where were you?' Baba inquires.
'I was sweeping the verandah, Baba. There is so much to do at home...can't you take today off from the caves?' I ask him tentatively.
He takes his time washing his face and then drying it slowly, before he replies.
'Sara', that's what he calls me when he wants to show affection; 'My whole life has been about sculpting. If I don't do it for even a single day, I feel like my life is getting wasted. But I know you need me around the house too...so I promise I will come back early tonight and do whatever you need me to do around here.'
'But Baba, you are so tired in the evenings. I don't feel like asking you to do anything more than rest.'
'Don't worry silly girl, I will save some energy for this. Now fetch me something to eat. I am famished!'
And with that Baba walks off to the nearby stream to take bath.
I prepare a simple meal of spiced barley and serve it with hot milk. As usual, as he eats, he shares his new inspirational ideas with me for today's carvings. Sometimes I hate those caves. It's like Baba loves them more than he loves me.
But I play along and ask him how I can help him around today. He finishes off his meal and gets ready to leave. I tell him I will join him at lunch and help him in arranging his new murals.
He may have a team of 107 sculptors under him but he trusts my aesthetic sense when it comes to positioning his pieces of art.
As I see him walk away towards the caves in the distance, my mind meanders back to my fair complexion and how I hate it.
Life is simple in my world and it is easy to forget about the hardships of life by musing about such trivial things. After all, what else is there to worry about!
Had I known this would be the last time I will see my Baba alive, I would never have let him go to those wretched caves!
My real life will start today...when my Baba' life will come to an abrupt end...
-x-