Kim Namjoon POV,
June 5th, 2020,
I walked back to the main house after checking the members in the upper house. All of them -except Jimin and Jungkook- were awake and ready to cook lunch.
I hobbled to my upstairs room and took out a book on modern art from my suitcase. Then I went back downstairs and saw JK who was busy assembling a toy plane.
"Can I read beside you, Jk?", I asked approaching him
"Reading? Ye, of course", he replied without looking at me
"Okay ...", I said as I sat beside him and began to open my book
We are currently in the city of Chunchon, the capital of Gangwon Province north of Seoul, to shoot the program In The Soop. It's been 3 days we've been here and we will return to Seoul this afternoon. We will prepare for our online concert which will be held on June 14th and then will come back here after that.
* pipipipip
My cell phone rang, I reached into my trouser pocket and picked up the phone.
"Yeobosseyo?", I said
"Namjoon~aah, am I disturbing you?", Said Sejin from across the phone
"Ani, hyung ... what's wrong?", I asked, rubbing my face
"I've scheduled your therapy this afternoon, so you'll be back early this afternoon", said Sejin again
"ye, gomawo", I replied
"Okay, I'll ... uh, just a moment", Sejin's voice disappeared
"Hyung? Yeobosseyo? Are you still there ??", I asked as I walked out of the house to the edge of the lake
Sejin didn't answer, he sounded like he was talking to someone nearby, but I don't know what he was talking about.
"Namjoon~aah, sorry, I just got news from the hospital, they said Sora just woke up!", Said Sejin quickly
"Huh? What? say that again, hyung??", I said, frowning, trying to confirm again
"Kim Sora ssi just woke up! Her condition is quite stable but she still looks confused", he replied
"Jinjja ?? Really ?? Thank God !! Aigoo... thank goodness ...", I said, laughing while holding back tears
I approached a swing made of wood and sat down, rubbing my eyes.
"Ye, thank goodness. The doctors are currently checking her condition ... you don't have to worry anymore, Namjoon~aah ... I think she will be fine", Sejin said
"Hyung, can I meet her? I really want to meet her today ...", I said again
"I don't know, I have to ask the doctors about this first, I'll let you know after you arrive in Seoul, okay?", He said again
"Okay, thank you, hyung", I replied as he ended our conversation
I smiled with relief knowing this, I looked at the stretch of lake and green trees on the hill in front of me. I felt that this scene was 50 times more beautiful than before. My heart feels light, the burden on my head feels yawn.
It has been more than 20 days since Sora was in a coma, she was lying in the ICU without showing any signs of regaining consciousness. According to doctors, this could be due to damage to the nerves in her head. They have also done various ways so that Sora can open her eyes, but to no avail.
I came to visit her at the hospital twice, but I could not see her in person. Because there is a pandemic, the hospital applies a rule that no visitors are allowed in the ICU room. So I can only see her through the glass window.
I was so sad to see her lying alone with various medical devices attached to her body. Why did she have to experience this? I feel really guilty for not being able to protect her well.
* pipipipip
"Yeobosseyo", I replied
"Hyuung, lunch is ready. They asked you to come here", Jimin's hoarse voice came from across the phone
Looks like he just woke up, I thought.
"Ah, ye. I'll be there. Gomawo", I answered and hung up on my phone
I limped towards the main house.
"Taehyung~aah, Jungkook~aah .... they asked us to go to the upper house for lunch", I said from the doorway to them
"Lunch is ready?", Asked V from the kitchen
"Ye, they asked us to go there now, come on", I asked as he headed for the house above
"Ye", replied Jk, carrying the sausage he had grilled and walked with me
I saw from a distance the atmosphere in the house above, Suga was struggling with the grill in front of him. Jhope is seen going in and out of the house carrying cutlery, while Jin is in the kitchen cooking something.
This time we will have lunch on the terrace of the upper house. I saw Tae put a plateful of melon slices with prosciutto on top, which he had just made in the main house earlier, and decorate a cheese with a little blue umbrella. I smiled seeing it. Tae really likes decorating food, he likes details.
"Wow, why is it cloudy?", Asked Jin who came out of the house
"Wae? Is it bad when it's cloudy?", I asked
"Ani, it's just that I was too hot while cleaning the fish," said Jin laughing
"Aahh!", Came a scream from Suga
LHe had just dropped a piece of roasted rib when he was about to put it on the plate.
"Three seconds ... ", I said, turning my head at him
"Too late", said Suga
"Hyung, just wash it with water then add spices and roast again", said Jk looking at the ribs lying on the ground
"You want to try it?", Asked Suga chuckled at him
Jk immediately fell silent and grinned shyly.
"Waah this is a feast", I said looking at the pile of pork ribs that Suga had just put in front of me
"Is there rice?", Asked Jk when Jin distributed the chopsticks to us
"No, we don't have rice", said Jin
"Wasn't there any leftover rice yesterday?", Asked Suga
"It's gone, but here is nurungji (rice crust)", said Jhope
"You cooked all the rice into nurungji?", Asked Jin to V
"Wow, there are so many nurungji", said Suga chuckled
Our lunch menu for today are mulhoe (sliced raw fish and vegetables in sour and spicy soup) and grilled pork ribs, plus some side dishes that V and Jk have made earlier. After we all sat around the dining table, Jin began to pour the mulhoe soup over the large bowl filled with fish slices and various kinds of vegetables.
"Thank you for the food," I said before starting to eat our lunch
"This must be delicious", said Jimin
We started eating while chatting occasionally.
"Jin hyung, the mulhoe is delicious," said Jhope
"Jinjja? Gomawo", replied Jin
"Try my melon hyung", said V to the others
"Is this really served like this?", Asked Jhope on V
"Ye, this is one of the snacks when we drink wine", said V explained
"Woaah ... the taste is quite unique, sweet and salty", said Jimin after trying the melon
"So what are we going to eat tonight?", Asked Jk while munching pork ribs
"Let's eat instant chapaguri (chapagetti and neoguri, like in a parasite movie)", said Jhope.
"Ye, ye chapaguri must be delicious", said Jin after swallowing his food
"Hyung, the staff said you will return to Seoul early?", Asked V to me
"Ye, I have a therapy schedule this afternoon", I replied
"Therapy for your feet?", Asked Jimin
"Ye, my leg hurts again, I have to do something before we start practicing for our concert next week", I replied while chewing a sausage
"Is there any news about Sora's condition, Namjoona~aah?", Asked Suga looking at me from the corner of the dining table
"Ah ye, I forgot to tell you, Sejin hyung said earlier that Sora just woke up from coma. maybe I'll meet her after my therapy session is over", I said smiling at my friends
"Jinjja?" Asked Jhope, widened his eyes at me
"Really? Thank God," said V, a smile slowly painted on his face
"Ye ... I feel very relieved and grateful. Sejin hyung said, currently her condition is quite stable", I said again
"Thank God, I'm glad to hear that", said Suga, nodding his head
"I hope she can recover soon, the injuries she suffered are quite severe, right?", Said Jimin looking at me
"Ye, I also hope that noona will recover soon, she is a strong woman," said Jk
"Is the case really going to be closed?", Asked Jin
"I don't know yet, maybe after the police get direct information from Sora, they will immediately close it. Because the perpetrator of this crime is dead, I don't think the police can do anything", I replied staring at the bowl in front of me
"Frankly, I'm still surprised to know the culprit is one of her employees, really scary", said Jhope with a serious face
"How did Bighit respond?", Asked Suga again
"Actually they asked me to think about my relationship with Sora, but I can't decide yet because I haven't discussed it with Sora", I replied with a serious face
"What does it mean?", Asked Jk
"I don't know ... I don't know exactly what the company means", I replied shrugging my shoulders
"They do not ask you to end your relationship right?", Asked Jhope looking at me
I was surprised and stare at him, I didn't think that far.
"I don't think that's what Bighit meant, they never forbid us to have a relationship before, and that is also written in the contract", replied Jimin, frowning
"I don't know. I just hope things like this will never happen again. I can see that this problem really make you unfocused, Namjoon~aah. Every day you look gloomy and like a lot of burden on your head", said Jin
"Ye, Jin hyung is right. Although you can cover it well when in front of the camera, we can still feel it", said V looking at me
"Jinjja? I'm sorry ... I really thought a lot about that incident ... I'm sorry once again", I replied earnestly
"I hope in the future there will only be happiness around you Namjoon~aah", said Suga sincerely smiling at me
After finishing lunch, we divided up the cleaning tasks. I'm currently washing dishes in the kitchen. My feet hurt a lot when I have to stand still like this.
"Namjoon~hyung, let me do the dishes, you have to get ready right?", Said Jimin, coming over to me
"Ok, gomawo", I replied, drying my hands. "Jk, please help Jimin dry the plate", I asked Jk
"Ye", he replied
I walked slowly towards the main house. I haven't tidied up my suitcase yet, while the driver is waiting for me to take me back to Seoul.
"Hyung, do you wash dishes?", I asked Jin when I opened the kitchen door of the main house
"Ne, these were dirty dishes from last night," replied Jin without turning his head
"But you've already cooked, why are you still washing dishes too? Oh, thanks for the food, it's delicious", I said earnestly as I walked towards the stairs
"Ye", replied Jin from the kitchen
I immediately tidy up the book I read earlier and put it in my suitcase. I only brought a few clothes so I didn't take long to pack. In just 5 minutes, my suitcase and bag were ready. I carried them downstairs and dragged them towards the car that was waiting for me.
I said goodbye to the members in the upper house and then got into the car and sat in the passenger seat. I turned on my cellphone and typed a message to Sunmi. As long as Sora is unconscious, I always ask her about Sora's condition.
"Annyeong Sunmi ssi, I heard Sora has regained consciousness? I'm on my way back to Seoul. How is her current condition?", I wrote quickly
I massage my right leg while resting my head on the car seat.
* tring
I read the message from Sunmi.
"Ye oppa, Sora has regained consciousness. I'm in the hospital at this time, but can't meet her yet. Sora is still in the intensive care room for further examination. We can only see her after she is transferred to the general care room. Be careful on the way, oppa ", Sunmi's message
"Arasso, gomawo yo Sunmi ssi", I replied
I breathed a sigh of relief. She will be fine, she will soon recover, I thought. I leaned my head and closed my eyes. The past few weeks I can't get enough sleep because of thinking about Sora's conditions. I choose to do music and read books to take my mind off. Now I'm going to try to sleep, I think sleeping for 1-2 hours will make me more refreshed when I meet Sora later, I thought.
———————————————————————
4, 5 hours later, Seoul
When I arrived at Yongsan Hospital, my manager and I walked straight to the lobby and approached the information desk.
"Annyeong, we want to ask where is the general patient care room located?", Asked Sejin to an officer on duty
"The name of the patient?", He asked kindly
"Kim Sora ssi", continued Sejin
"Kim Sora ssi, 26 years old? Western treatment room, 7th floor room number 710. You can turn right at the front then walk straight until you find an elevator. Go up to the 7th floor and turn left, you will find room 710 at the end of hallway ", he replied in detail
"Kamsahamnida", replied Sejin, nodding his head
"You're welcome", he replied friendly
We walked towards the direction the officer had pointed us at. My legs feel better already, even though I can't walk too fast right now. I had finished my therapy sessions and immediately headed for this hospital when Sunmi said that Sora had been transferred to the general treatment room and was looking very well.
I moved the balloon filled with flowers from my right hand to my left when we entered the elevator to the 7th floor. I'm so excited, I really miss Sora right now.
When the elevator door opened on the 7th floor, I immediately saw Sunmi who was sitting in a waiting room. She was seen having a serious conversation with a middle-aged woman.
"Annyeong, Cha Sunmi ssi", I said as I opened my mask when I arrived in front of her
"Ye? ah! Anyyeong oppa! You arrived .... ", Said Sunmi turning her face and smiling
"Ye", I replied while bowing to the beautiful middle aged woman beside her
"Oppa! Let me introduce you to Sora's mother. Oemoenim (addressing friend's mother/ older woman in formal way), this is Kim Namjoon ssi, Sora's boyfriend ", said Sunmi standing in front of me introducing the two of us
"Ah, annyeong! Nice to meet you Oemonim, I'm sorry I haven't had the chance to introduce myself. I'm Kim Namjoon, Sora's boyfriend", I said bowing at her
"Anyyeong Kim Namjoon ssi, I have heard a lot about you from Sora, it's nice to finally meet you, even in a situation like this", she said with a friendly smile, her smile reminded me of Sora's smile
"Ye, Sora also told me about you, I hope you're always healthy Oemonim", I smiled at her
"Anyway, this is my manager", I said introducing Sejin to Sunmi and Sora's mom
"How is Sora's condition?", I asked them both
"She is fine, all medical devices have been removed, even though she is still using the oxygen, but all of her vital organs are functioning properly. The doctor said there were no signs of damage to her brain, but she still could not move much and communicate properly ", explained Sunmi with enthusiasm
"Ye, for now Sora is still not strong enough to move her body, because the wound on her ribs has not healed. She can answer the questions by us and the team of doctors, it's just that her voice is still very weak. But for someone who just woke up from a coma, Sora's condition is very, very good ", continued her mother with teary eyes
"Thank God ....", I replied smiling relieved
"Ah, yeobo (honey/darling, usually used by married couples). This is Sora's boyfriend, Kim Namjoon ssi", said Sora's mother to the well-built middle-aged man who had just arrived at the waiting room
"Nice to meet you", replied the man nodded at me
"Annyeong Ahboenim (adressing friend's father/older men in formal way), I'm Kim Namjoon, nice to meet you. I'm sorry I just greet you now", I said formally while bowing 90 degrees
"Ye. I am Kim Seojun, Sora's father", he replied briefly
Then he turned to his wife and Sunmi.
"Yeobo, Sora wants to talk to you, You too Sunmi~aah", he said pointing to the hallway where Sora's room was
"Ne, come on Sunmi. Kim Namjoon ssi do you want to come with us?", Asked Sora's mother to me
"You just go first. There's something I want to talk to him about", replied Sora's father looking at me
"Arasso", then Mrs. Kim bowed to me and walked towards Sora's room while holding Sunmi's hand
Me and Sunmi looked at each other before she went to follow Sora's mother.
"Sit down please, Kim Namjoon ssi. Sorry, who are you?", Asked Sora's father to Sejin
"Annyeong, I am Sejin, the manager of Kim Namjoon ssi," said Sejin
"Ah, ne. You must be very busy huh ... nice to meet you. May I ask You a favor, Sejin ssi? I want to talk to Namjoon alone, can you leave us for a moment?", Asked Mr. Kim kindly
"Ye, of course. I'll be waiting for you in the lobby," Sejin said to me and bowed to us before getting into the elevator
I feel nervous, to be honest, this is the first time I've faced my girlfriend's parents. Even though Sora's parents look nice and friendly, I still feel anxious.
"Please Sit down", said Sora's father to me, pointing to a chair in front of him
I put the balloon filled with flowers I brought on the table and sat across from Mr. Kim.
"Sorry we have to meet in a situation like this. I know you are very busy, but knowing you still take the time to visit my daughter makes me very happy and grateful", he said
"Ye Ahboenim, I'm sorry I didn't come to see you earlier", I replied
"Gwaenchana, I know you are the busiest group in Korea, ah ani, in the world .... I understand that. You know, when Sora told me that she had a famous boyfriend, I never thought it would be you, haha .... I know about BTS of course, I work in the music industry so I have to know about music in Korea and in the world as well ", said Mr. Kim smiled at me
"Ani, we are not that great, Ahboenim", I said, looking down embarrassed
"No, I'm not saying it too much, you make Korea proud. I felt proud and surprised when I found out that you and Sora are really dating. She really loves you, do you know that? I never saw her that happy when she told me about your relationship," he said again
"Ye, I really love her too, she's the most extraordinary woman I've ever met. I think for sure everyone who meets her will like her", I replied smiling, remembering Sora's smiling face
"Ye, I can see that you love her too. You are a kind and polite man in my opinion, my daughter is very lucky to meet a man like you", he said, nodding his head
"Ani, I'm the lucky man", I replied smiling at Mr. Kim
He smiled then took a deep breath and looked at me seriously.
"You know, I really want to see you and Sora happy ... but after seeing Sora lying in a coma a couple of weeks, I think you should end your relationship with her...", said Sora's father looking at me
"Huh? Sorry? What ?? ... I, I don't understand", I replied confusedly, frowning
"I know it will be hard for you, but I don't think your relationship will work. The two of you have a different world, you are a famous star while my daughter is just an ordinary Korean girl. I don't want to see or hear bad comments from your fans about my daughter. You saw what happened to her when there was an obsessive fan knowing your relationship, right? I don't want to lose my daughter, Kim Namjoon~aah ", said Mr. Kim with teary eyes
I was speechless hearing Mr. Kim' s words. I just felt shocked, I thought he would bless our relationship, but it turns out he said otherwise. I am very sad and devastated at this time.
"Did you know how my wife and I felt when we found out that Sora was injured and lost her baby? We feel devastated, why does our dear daughter have to experience something like this? What have I done in my previous life that my daughter has to suffer like this ??", he said with great emotion
"We haven't even had time to be happy and thankful for the pregnancy, but ... but we have to lose the baby again. And my daughter .... she, she fell unconscious without knowing about it", he continued sobbing, trying to hold back his tears
My heart hurts and sad to see this charismatic man have to fall like this. MHe must really love Sora and his family. I wiped the tears from my eyes and took a handkerchief from my pocket and gave it to Mr. Kim.
"Gomawo, ah ... I'm sorry. I shouldn't act like this", he said, shaking his head while wiping his eyes using my handkerchief
"Ani, I know you must feel sad when you see someone you care about getting hurt. I felt that way when I saw Sora hurt right in front of me, I ... I felt like my world was destroyed. But, but I will prove to you that I can make her happy and build a safe and warm world for her. I will protect her from all the evil comments of the people. I will prove it Ahboenim, I love her very much ", I said solemnly
"How?? Are you going to marry her right now?", Asked Mr. Kim raised his eyebrows
"Ye, I'm going to marry her", I replied determinedly
Mr. Kim looked at me in disbelief and turned his face in another direction.
"Even if you want to marry her, I won't give you permission. You are still young, Namjoon~aah, getting married is not something you can do just because you love each other, there are many things that you have to think carefully about. Moreover, you are a public figure, are you ready when your fans do not support you anymore? Are you ready everyone will blaspheme you? Maybe you are ready for it, but what about my daughter ?? When that happens, you will make him even suffer", said Mr. Kim was full of emotions until his face became very red
I grit my jaw and hold back my tears. Could it be that marrying me would make her suffer even more? What if people like Aeri show up? Will I be able to protect her? I lowered my face and took a deep breath, trying to calm myself.
"Continue your life Namjoon~aah, chase all your dreams. Prove to Sora that you can create a safe and warm world for her. And when you're ready, you can come back to Sora, I'm sure she will happily wait and accept you back", said Mr. Kim
"Is there no other way? I don't want to lose her...", I replied in a choked voice
"There must be another way, but for now, that's the only best way you have. I think the management and members also want the best for you. It's just that Aeri's problem with Sora has turned into a big problem, so it will be difficult to cover ", said Mr. Kim looked at me with a fatherly gaze
I massaged my forehead trying to think clearly, trying to find an objection to Mr. Kim' words earlier. But the more I thought about it, the more I agreed with what he had said.
This incident has indeed received attention from the public. Bighit went to great lengths to prevent the CCTV footage from Minerva from being exposed to the media. Until now the public didn't know my involvement in that incident. The company also doesn't want this incident to shake the existence of BTS.
"Sorry, I disturbed you", came Sejin's voice from behind me
"Hyung? What's wrong?", I asked, rubbing my face
"We have to go Namjoon~aah, we will have a meeting at the office at 8. Do you remember?", Said Sejin
"Is it time to go? But I haven't met Sora yet, hyung ...", I answered softly
"We don't have time, we have to go now or we'll be late," said Sejin again
I turned my face back to Mr. Kim who sat staring at us both.
"Go, think about what I have told you earlier. I will tell Sora that you came to visit", said Mr. Kim calmly
"But ... hyung? Just a moment?", I asked Sejin
"We'll be late Namjoon~aah, the producer and the staff are waiting for us", Sejin replied sympathetically
I lowered my face and sighed.
"All right, please give this to Sora, Ahboenim", I said while giving the flower balloon I brought earlier
"Ye, I'll give this to Sora. Thank you", said Mr. Kim smiled at me
"I will think about what you say, I will find a better way for us. Now excuse me," I said, bowing to him
I walked off to the elevator feeling dizzy. Mr. Kim really only wanted the best for Sora, and I did too. But if it means that I have to end my relationship with Sora, I honestly feel hard doing that.
"Namjoon~aah, did you know that your relationship really affects the members and the company too?", Sejin asked me
"Huh? What do you mean, hyung?", I asked
"You seem to have lost focus due to this problem, and it also seems like your priority has changed a bit", said Sejin as we walked out of the elevator
"You mean I prioritize my relationship more than my job?", I asked looking at him in disbelief
"Ye. Previously you were not a selfish person and always prioritized BTS and work. But now, you only think of Sora and neglect some duties as a leader", said Sejin looking at me when we arrived at the hospital lobby
"Jinjja ?? Did the company complain about that to you?", I asked while lowering my face
"No, not yet, they are trying to respect your privacy. It is based on my observations and what I feel for you. We've been together for almost 9 years, Namjoon~aah. I know when you are in trouble even if you don't say it", he replied and open the car door for me
"What do you think I should do, hyung?", I asked after we got into the car
"Break up with Sora", replied Sejin looking at me
"WHAT?!?", I screamed in disbelief at what he just said
"I don't think this is the right time for you to have a relationship. There are too many problems you cause. And I'm afraid that if this is known by the public then your name and BTS will not last," Sejin replied looking at me with a serious face
I was speechless, my mouth fell open in shock. I can't believe those words will come out of his mouth ... what's this? Our relationship hasn't always been smooth sailing, but to say that our relationship caused a lot of trouble is an exaggeration.
Two people already said this to me, do the members feel the same way ?? My mind is so full at the moment, it hurts.
"Think about it Namjoon~aah, before it's too late", said Sejin ending his conversation
I closed my eyes, trying to get rid of all the thoughts and words that I had just heard.
——————————————————————
Hi Army, Stay safe n stay gold wherever you are,
Borahae 💜💜💜💜