I sat down at the end of the long dinning room table in front of one of the doors that led into the chandelier candle lit hallway. Rose stood near the door in case if any of us needed help with anything. The doctor sat at the other send of the table. Behind him was a row of window that were covered with black out curtains. Only so little light came in through the glass windows.
1 was seated at the right of the left and 2 sat across from him, which was on the doctor's right. 3 sat next to 1 and 4 sat next to 2. 5 sat next to 3 and 6 sat next to 4. 7 sat next to 5 and 8 sat next to 6. 7 was on my left and 8 was on my right.
There wasn't much talk before dinner was served. The only time anybody said anything, was when the doctor decided to speak. It seemed as though everybody was too afraid to say anything. Of course that was the case. Nobody knew why they were there.
I had my head down for the entire time, but once a bowl of stew was placed in front of me with a spoon by a golden brown man dressed in a white button down kitchen uniform, I lift my head up ever so slightly.
My eyes scanned the food, thinking of how much I should eat. I found that It only took me a few seconds to to realize the doctor began talking. I picked up the spoon, but quickly found It was a bit frustrating to pick it up. I didn't know how to use it properly. The silver eating utensil plopped back onto the pale peach colored table cloth where it once was.
I can't hold it. I feel so weak. I feel so tired. I can barley hold my arms up. I could barley walk through the corridors to get outside.
I lift my head up more to where I could look around. I saw that most of the 8 in front of me didn't have to ability to use they're utensils either. Rose was going around helping and teaching them how to properly hold them. I was relived to know that I wasn't the only one with this problem.
"It's like a pencil," She explains, looking around at everyone to make sure they were listening. "Hold it like a pencil."
I seemed 2 already knew what it was and how to hold one in his hand. 2 got the hang of it quicker than the others.
Rose gently moved her eyes on me. I knew she saw that I was having trouble, too. She walked around to me after she was finished with 2. She took the spoon from me and gently took my hand to guide me.
"But I'm not writing." I pointed out, looking up at her.
I over heard the doctor chuckle across the table.
"No," Rose breathed, "You are using it to eat. Do you know how to raise your arm and put the food in your mouth?"
I nodded and by proving to her that I could do so, I raised my right arm with the spoon in my hand and tried putting the food in my mouth... but my mask was in the way... how was I suppose to eat when I have to have this thing on to stay alive...?
The doctor sighed, "He's going to have to be fed through a tube... there isn't much he can do for now..." He looked at Rose while 6, 8, and 5 giggled a little, "Quit playing with him and get on with it."
Rose nodded once, "Yes, Dr. Hauffman," and at that, she left the room for some reason.
"Quite the smartass, aren't you?" 7 said next to me. He was leaning his head against his hand and his elbow was on the table when I turned my head a little. "Your also cute."
I did say anything. I just listened and gave him a nod. I didn't think much of it when he called me cute. I just brushed it off.
"Shy or something?"
I shook my head.
7 looked the same age as me, but seemed to be turning 18 soon. Maybe in a few days or so.
"Are you even hungry at all?" 8 asked me.
Honestly, the answer to her question was a big fa yes. I didn't feel the need to consume food at all. I gave her a nod.
"Can I have yours, then?" She asked, "I'm really hungry."
For some reason, I smiled underneath my mask. Why did I smile? Did it make me happy or something? It must have. 8 was giving off completely different energy than what 7 was. It was more positive.
"Ask the doctor first." 7 demanded.
8 looked 7, a bit confused to why get was being rude.
"She can have it," I said in my soft voice. My eyes turned on the doctor to make sure it was okay for her to take my bowl. It took the doctor a little bit to respond to us. It seemed like he was thinking about it. He nodded and raised his right hand in the air to gesture it was okay. "It's fine. A lady needs her strength." To the others, he seemed to be joking, but to me... I knew he was being serious.
"May I be excused?" I asked as I gently pushed the bowl over to 8. I was a little embarrassed by what happened earlier with Nurse Rose. I needed a breath.
The doctor gave me a nod.
Right then and there, I quickly pushed my seat out and rushed towards the door on my left. The door was already open, so there was no need to push or turn anything. I took a side step away from the doorway and quickly pushed myself back against the wall. I took a deep breath.