I lie on the grass panting and laughing with Angel, who looks very sleepy now. She lays her head on my arm, curling into me. I tug on her chubby cheeks making her giggle. I pull her into me and rock her until she falls asleep. I see Mr Albert notice Angel sleeping in my arms. He walks towards us and offers to take her inside. I kiss her forehead before saying goodbye. Oh, it feels so good to take care of a child. Should I have one already? I shake my head to get rid of such silly thoughts. I am not ready at all.
I look around to find Nathan. He said he had an urgent call from office but hasn't returned yet.
"April!" Nathan calls me hurriedly and he rushed inside the garden. We have to go." he says, panic evident in his voice.
"What's up?" I ask, "Another stock hit?"
"April..." he trails off. His worry making me nervous. Something is definitely very wrong. He is squirming, unable to form sentences.
"Your dad is sick. They are saying its a heart attack. I'm so sorry." he says. I stare at him blankly as minutes pass by. I feel like I have heard him wrong. His words are not registering in my head. My dad is sick? How can that be? A heart attack? I feel numb and I can't feel my heart anymore. My phone rings and I pick it up quickly, seeing my mom's number on the screen.
"April!" she says, panicking, panting, crying, "He just...he..." she tries to say something but her sobs restricts her, "They are saying...its...heart attack."
"Mom," I say, after so long, "Mom, calm down, please! I'm on my way." I motion Nathan to get the car, "Mumma, calm down. Daddy is a fit man, there is no way he is having a heart attack. I mean all those jogging and exercise is going to pay off, okay? Now, please maintain your calm I'm on my way. Mumma, I love you, I'll be there." I say as I close the car's door. I close my eyes and collect myself. I can't break right now. I need to stay calm. My mother needs me, my father needs me.
There is a heavy tug on my heart. I have ignored them for weeks now, not caring how much my actions must have affected my dad. Not caring that my actions were hurting him. Maybe it was stressed that I caused resulted in this situation. I am such a bad daughter. He has always been there for me and this is how I treat him. What if he doesn't make it? What will I do then?
"April? It's going to be okay. He's going to be fine. Please don't overthink and blame it all on you. It wasn't you." Nathan says as if reading my thoughts.
"But it was me Nathan. It was all me."
"No it wasn't. I talked to your parents daily in the last few weeks. They understood that you needed to stay away from them. And you don't need to worry about anything, we have the best hospitals nearby. I will personally ensure that he gets the best care." He interwines our fingers, sending me all his strength, "Right now, we aren't even sure if it's a heart attack."
I jump out of the car as soon as we reach the hospital.
"Honey!" mom hugs me as I reach her. Her eyes are swollen from the tears, I cup her face and kiss her head. I hug her again. I have missed her so much. I cried in her arms and let out everything.
"I am so sorry mom. I am such a bad daughter. I should have never treated you..." I am unable to complete my sentence. I continue to cry with her.
"It's okay, my love. I love you so much." She cannot control her tears and neither can I. We sit outside the ER waiting for the doctors to complete their analysis.
"Mrs Grey." the doctor comes out of the room. We wipe our tears and turn our attention to him, "Your husband is absolutely fine. He didn't have a heart attack. It's just a gastric attack." he smiles at us and my jaw hit the ground. Gastric attack? Seriously dad? You scare the living life out of us by having gastric pain?
"Are you sure?" My mom asks in disbelief, "I mean, he was in so much pain. He said it felt like he would not make it."
"Yes Ma'am. But there is nothing to worry about. I think your husband has a low tolerance for pain." He jokes, my mother is not amused, "I'm sorry. But no he's fine. It was a heartburn. I think he is eating street-food a lot so he needs to cut down on that. Other than that, his routine is fine. Take care, ma'am. You can take him home after the medicines are over. I have written him some additional meds to avoid this type of condition again." he hands me a piece of paper, "The pharmacy is down the hall." he points to my right.
My mother goes inside the room with heavy footsteps. Uh-oh, dad's in trouble. "Andrew Grey! How many times have a told you not to eat that disgusting street meat of yours! Do you know how worried I was?! Do you know how worried April was?! I'm going to burn that stupid cart down...!! "
"I should probably go." the doctor says scratching the back of his head.
"Yes." I smile at him.
I turn to go down to the Pharmacy but Nathan interrupts me. He insists on buying he I lost him as soon as we entered the hospital. I enter the room where my dad is sitting on the bed with monitors beeping beside him. I run and hug him.
"I'm sorry daddy." I sob. He shushes me and brushes my hair. "I..." I don't even know what to say. I was the most terrible daughter in history.
"Shh...it's okay. It's all okay. I understand what you were going through. I'm sorry we kept everything from you. We love you very much."
"I love you too daddy." I say in a breaking voice and hug him again. The door clicks open and Nathan joins us. He gives me dad a small smile.
"How are you feeling, Mr Grey?"
"I'm okay now." my dad replies, "I'm not sure how it happened."
"I am sure. Nathan you can blame the pathetic cart outside our office." My mom says bitterly.
"Mr. Grey, Mr Grey..." Nathan shakes his head in disappointment.
"It's okay now. Don't attack my dad." I hug him possessively.
"Ahh, I have got my team member back now, Liz. You cannot gang up on me." He laughs.
"Oh don't worry Mrs Grey, I'm on your team." Nathan stands besides her. My mom laughs and gives Nathan a side hug.
"Thank you for everything, Nathan."
"Oh please, Mrs Grey, that's what teams do." I look at Nathan with heart eyes.
"I told you he's a good one." Dad whispers to me and I nod at him lovingly. He is a good one. One of the rare ones.
After a few more hours of monitoring, the doctors finally discharge my dad. We drive home with him and I decide to stay my parents for a few days. My mom invited Nathan too but he didn't oblige. Nathan told me I should spend some time alone with them. Although I didn't want to stay away from him anymore, it was the right thing to do. I needed some family time after the roller coaster I went through. I also needed to find a way to tell my mom and dad about Gwen. How will they react.
At the dinner table, things were silent. There was of course an elephant in the room.
"Mom, dad.." I break the silence, "I...I found my birth mother." The table fell more silent than it was possible. There was a strange emotion in my mother's eyes. She gulped hard. There was a fear reflected on her face. What is she afraid of?
"Okay..." My dad finally said, but that is all he could say.
"Her name is Gwen. She lives in the neighborhood behind the orphanage. She is a..." How do I tell them that I am the daughter of a sex worker?
"Honey..." My dad interrupts, "I'm happy that you found something. Are you feeling better about all this now?"
"I...I don't know..." I kept looking at my mom who did not say anything. "Mom?" I said and tears sprung in her eyes, "What is it?"
"Liz..." My dad gets up to comfort her. She takes a few moments to recollect herself.
"It's okay. I'm fine. I just...I didn't think you would find her. Do you want to live with her now?" She asks. Her voice full of fear.
"What? No! I want to live here. This is my home. Mom..." I get up and run to her, "I'm not going anywhere. I never was. I just needed some space to think and process everything. Gwen...she's...she is...she is a sex worker. She gave me up to protect me from that world and she doesn't want me to visit her ever again. I don't know how I feel about that but one thing is for sure, you are my mother." Tears of joy escape my mom's eyes. She hugs me tightly and kisses my forehead.
"You are my daughter. I love you so much."
"I love you too mom."
After dinner I freshen up and pick my phone. I have two messages from Nathan. I smile and quickly open them.
"Hey. How's it going?" Nathan wrote. I feel a little disappointed by such simple text. I thought he would write some hearty message saying he misses me and can't sleep without me. Urgh, that's just stupid, I'm just behaving like a teenager.
"Not the best. I told them everything but there is still some awkwardness."
"That's okay. Give it a few days." He immediately texts back. "Do you need anything?"
"No. I have my clothes and almost everything here. If I need something I'll let you know."
"Sure! Have a goodnight, darling."
"You too. :)"
I re-read the message and feel a detachment from his side. This is such a formal conversation, almost like we are strangers. Are we strangers? As I get ready for bed, my phone rings on the side table. Nathan's name flashes on it.
"Hey..."
"So, on a scale of 1-10 how much did you hate those texts?" He asks me cheekily, bringing a smile to my face.
"They weren't the best."
"I'm sorry, I just don't know what to say over a text."
"What do you want to say?"
"That I miss you. And I'm lying in the bed for the last hour trying to sleep but I can't. This bed feels too empty without you." I cannot stop smiling.
"You can sleep on the couch." I joke. He chuckles on the other end, "You were the one who said no to my mother's offer."
"Oh, so now you'll punish me for that?"
"Yep. You should be punished."
"Then come fast and punish me all you want." I laught out loud, "April, would you like to go away for a while? Like a weekend getaway?"
"This weekend? I can't."
"You will be staying there the whole week?" I hum in agreement, "Okay then, next weekend?"
"Yeah sure. Let's go somewhere."
"Great!" There was an excitement in his voice. "I'll plan something."
"Okay." I say. A yawn escapes my mouth. Today was a long day.
"Alright, let's sleep now. Goodnight darling."
"Goodnight, Nathan." I lay back in back and immediately fall asleep.