I stayed on the couch until the sun dropped below the trees and the streetlights flickered to life. Despite the tension between us earlier, Leo and I settled into a comfortable silence. I drifted in and out of light sleep, watching him work through half-open eyes.
Finally, Leo slammed the binder he'd been scribbling in closed. "Alright," he said. "Enough work. Let's deal with that leg."
I stood shakily, my knees stiff after a day on the couch. Leo reach out an arm to steady me, and I took it, leaning gratefully on him.
I sat on the counter in the bathroom, heart pounding heavily in my chest. Light bouncing off the gold fixtures dazzled me, and I had to blink to clear the spots swimming in my vision. We had yet to remove the old bandage, and I was nervous to see what would lay underneath. The doctors had stitched it and I knew at some point they would dissolve. Beyond that, the healing process was a mystery to me. The physiotherapy the nurses helped me do in the hospital seemed to speed it up some, the atrophying muscles regaining tone. I hadn't been a hale child—I tired easily, and I never seemed to be able to keep up with the children my age. The repetitive motion of the exercises I had done in the hospital had served as a stark reminder of the days on the gym floor, stretching while my peers whooped and hit each other with balls.
Leo surfaced from under the sink, juggling several boxes. He set them down, and then took my hand in his. I traced the rose pattern with one finger, putting off the inevitable.
"Don't look," he said, and ripped the bandage off. I shrieked, and gripped his hand so tightly I thought his fingers would break. My vision went white, but the pain subsided quickly.
I looked down, and almost vomited.
My leg was shades of purple and green, swollen, with deep red lines emanating from the exit wound. "Is it infected?" I asked.
Leo shook his head, and ripped open the box of sterile strips. "It's healing fine for a wound as deep as it is. I'm actually surprised at how much you can walk. I expected you to be a wheelchair for a least another month."
I shrugged, and lifted my knee so he could roll the soft cotton around my leg. "I'm a trooper."
"I'll say." Leo smiled at me, and taped the ends down. At that moment, my stomach growled. I blushed, and put my hands over it. Leo laughed, and tossed the empty boxes into the garbage.
"Someone's hungry," he said, and helped me off the counter. I hissed as I caught the edge of my thigh on the marble counter. Leo pulled me forwards, and bent down to inspect the fresh dressing. There was no blood, but I felt tears prick my eyes anyways.
"Are you alright?" Leo asked, worried. I nodded, and placed a warm hand over the bandage.
"It just surprised me," I said. "But it stings a little now."
Leo considered me, and then walked out into his room. I could hear him muttering to himself. A pair of grey sweatpants came flying into the bathroom.
"Put those on." He called from the bedroom. "And I'll carry you to the kitchen."
I smiled to myself, and slid my bare legs into the warmth of the sweats. They were huge on me, the cuffs trailing on the ground.
"I'm ready," I called, and Leo came back in, a blue cardigan in hand. He draped it over my shoulders, and I burrowed into it.
"Alright," he said. "Hold on." He picked me up from below the knees and shoulders, so my arms wrapped around his neck.
"I feel like I'm too heavy for you," I said, as he made his way to the stairs.
"Nonsense." He held my legs with one hand, and steadied himself against the rail with the other. "I've carried you before, Ruth. At least this time you're cooperating."
I didn't say anything, and I felt a laugh rumble in his chest.
"What do you feel like eating?" he asked, as we descended the final stair into the kitchen. Two women were working at the island, their hands kneading bread. When they caught sight of Leo and I, they both went still and pale, the dough abandoned.
"Ladies, this is Ruth," Leo said, his voice pitching up again.
Both the women nodded, and went back to work, silently. Leo placed me on a stool at the large island, and opened the industrial fridge.
"There's nothing prepared for tonight, Mr. Laine," one of the women said. "But we have tomato soup chilling. We can heat it up, if you like."
I nodded at Leo, who smiled at the two ladies. The older one pulled a bowl out of the fridge, and a pot from above the stove. I watched in fascination as she expertly flicked switches, drawing flame into the element.
"Do you like cooking?" Leo asked, following my gaze. I nodded, entranced by the grandeur of the kitchen. It was restaurant scale- I supposed it had to be, for all the dinner parties Leo threw.
"I used to cook for my parents, 'cause they always worked late." The memory pulled at my heart. It was hard to reconcile the fact that I would never be making dinner for them again, never be in our little kitchen in the suburbs again.
"Hey," Leo said softly.
I shook myself, and smiled, first at him and then at the woman who put the soup in front of me. I tasted it experimentally, and when it proved to be good, hot and rich, I ate quickly. Leo watched in amusement.
"I don't think I can carry you back up those stairs at this rate," he teased. "You'll have to sleep down here."
My mood soured at the thought of the impending night. Leo noticed, and took the spoon from my hand, setting it down on the island. "Ruth," He started.
"I'll be alright." I said, cutting him off. "I just need a nightlight."
His face betrayed no emotion, but his words came out commanding, with no room for argument. "I'm not leaving you alone, not again. I'll sleep on the couch in your room, for now." I opened my mouth, but Leo held up a hand. "No, Ruth, listen. I know I can't help you with your nightmares, or even begin to imagine what you've been through. The least I can do is make sure you sleep."
"You've done more than enough for me." I said. "Leo, really, you don't have to."
Leo raised a brow, and I knew it was pointless arguing with him. I barely had a leg to stand on, considering how the first three nights I had spent with him had gone.
"If you think I'm going to give up that easily, you don't know me at all." Leo tapped the table. "Eat."
I picked my spoon up again. For the first time since the explosion, I was ravenous. By the time I finished eating, my eyes began to droop. I felt like I was moving through honey. The sleepless nights were catching up with me. Even so, the night ahead weighed on me. Reluctantly, I gathered myself, and prepared for the dark to descend.
Created with Sketch.
I lay awake in bed, hyper aware of the sound of deep, even breathing coming from the sofa under the window. Despite my insistence, Leo had made himself comfortable in my room. I had tried to protest, I had tried to argue, but Leo was powerful, even outside the office.
"Ruth, don't fuss at me. I'll do what I think is best, whether you like it or not."
I'd run, closing the door and hiding in the bed before he had a chance to follow. "Ruth, if you don't open this door in ten seconds, I will kick it down," he threatened, despite the door lacking a lock.
We had settled, finally, on a compromise. If I slept through one night, I could sleep alone. I had every intention of sleeping alone anyways, but I couldn't deny that his presence soothed my frayed nerves.
Of course it didn't last.
I woke up screaming, my lips split at the edges, blood pooling on my chin and running down to my neck. Leo was already awake, sitting on the edge of the bed. He was holding my hands against the bed, eyes sad.
"It's okay," he said, when he saw I was awake. "It was a dream. I'm right here."
It took me the space of a few breaths to orient myself again. I flexed my hands under Leo's strong grip. "Did I try to hit you again?" I asked.
Leo shook his head, releasing my hands. "You were clawing at yourself in your sleep." He traced lines over my inner arms and collarbones. "Stay here. I'll get a washcloth."
He stood, and looked down at me, an impenetrable sadness flitting across his face. The bathroom light flicked on, and I heard the tap running.
My arms stung, and I looked down at the raised nail marks that marred them. I ran my fingertips over my chest, and felt the braille of scrapes that crisscrossed it.
Leo came back, a warm washcloth in hand. He sat at the edge of the bed, and dabbed the blood from my mouth and chin. He lifted my head to clean along my jaw, and down the slope of my neck and into the hollow of my throat. I closed my eyes, the sensation of the gentle touch calming my racing heart. He was so close I could smell the vanilla and tobacco of his cologne.
"Thank you." I said, as he turned my arm over to clean the scratches. He brushed a hand over the delicate flesh, and I shivered as he brought my hand up to inspect the damage done to my wrist.
"I know you won't tell me what's going on in that head." He said, running his thumb over the thin skin. "But I can't bear to see you hurt."
I tugged my hand away, and slid forward on the bed, into the warm pool of lamplight. "I'm sorry," I said. My fingernails were bloody and broken.
"You don't have to apologize." Leo put a hand on my shoulder. "It's not your fault."
I turned into his touch, resting my head on his hand. Leo opened his arms to me, and in a moment of weakness, I sank into them.
"Don't leave me," I mumbled.
"I'm right here," he soothed. "Try to sleep."
"Leo?" I asked, my eyelids growing heavy.
"Hmm?" He responded, moving his hands from my hair to around my shoulders, pulling me flush to his side.
"If I hadn't been downtown that day, do you still think we would have met?"
"Do I believe in fate, you mean?"
I nodded against him.
"No. We wouldn't have. We moved in very different circles. Now that we have met, though, does it matter? I've spent time with so many girls, and none have made me care this much before."
"What do you mean, care?" I ignored the part about the other girls, reminding myself that he was a rich young man-of course he'd been with other girls. I swallowed the ball of jealousy in my throat, and let him answer.
"I don't care about people, Ruth. I see people as pawns-I can't help it. Everyone but you. You make me feel alive."
I felt my shoulders and stomach relax for what felt like the first time in weeks. Leo was clearly wide awake, but I was beginning to drift off, my mind sliding deeper into a dreamscape.
"I think we would have." I murmured, unaware of what I was saying, only trying to get the warmth out of my chest. I had no doubts on my feelings, but I did about his feelings for me.
There was a long silence, and Leo sighed, a painful, deep sigh. He pressed a kiss to my temple.
"You don't know what you're saying, Ruth. Sleep, baby."
The first thing I realized when I woke up was that I was well rested. It was something I hadn't felt in months, and for a second, the weight on my chest lifted, and I could breathe. I stretched languidly, feeling my muscles pull tight across my arms. I looked down and ran my finger over the raised nail marks. They made a mountain range of broken blood vessels over my forearms and up to my neck.
The second thing was that I was alone in bed, the sheets next to me rumpled, but empty. They were cold, and I frowned, wondering where Leo had gone. There was no sign of him in the room, and I couldn't hear the rise and fall of his voice, no matter how hard I strained my ears.
Rain was pelting the windows, the sun shining silver through the heavy, dark clouds. I shivered, and took the blue cardigan from my bed, wrapping it around myself. The air felt angry and oppressive, like the whole world was enraged. It wasn't a gentle rain, the kind that cleansed and washed away the grime of the days before. It was a harsh rain, punishing everything it touched.
There were a few pairs of fuzzy socks in the chest of drawers, and so I pulled them on, rubbing my hands over my thighs. I was still wary of my wound, nervous to put pressure on it.
I couldn't find Leo anywhere. The house was eerie and empty, the rain muffling all sound. I found myself in the grand hall, the party room. There was a raised dais at the end of the room, and I sat on it, watching water pool on the glass ceiling. Somewhere on the floor above, footsteps sounded. My head snapped towards the sound, relief pouring through me that I was not alone, after all.
I made my way back to the second floor, passing the closed door of Leo's office. As if activated by my presence, a voice came through the heavy oak.
"And if he kills someone?" The voice moved away, the rest of the phrase lost to me. It sounded like a woman, vaguely familiar, like I had heard it once on the radio, years ago.
A tattoo of feet came close to the door, and I leapt around the corner, just in time. An older woman stepped out, followed by Leo, who seemed stiff and tense.
"I'll see myself out, Mr. Laine," the woman said. Leo rolled his eyes as she walked away, leaning against the doorframe. I stifled a giggle, but it was too late. He stood up straight, his eyes scanning the hallway. When he saw me, half-hidden in the shadows, his jaw clenched. A ball of fear knotted in my stomach as he strode over to me, bigger and taller than ever.
"How much did you hear?" he demanded.
"Nothing."
"What did you hear, Ruth?" he repeated, punctuating each word with another step, until I had backed against the wall.
"Nothing, Leo, I swear!" I said, my eyes wide.
"Ruth, answer me truthfully." His gaze bored into my eyes, and I couldn't look away.
"Nothing. Nothing! Something about someone killing again. That's all!" I blinked back sudden tears. His face was inches from mine, his hands hard on my shoulders. "Leo, please." I wiggled out from his grip.
"Don't ever eavesdrop on my meetings, Ruth. Some of my deals are top secret, and if anyone knew you had heard anything, they could have you abducted or killed."
I rubbed my shoulders, and nodded, looking at the ground.
"I understand," I said.
"I don't think you do," Leo said. "I know you're curious, that you want to know more about what I do. I can't let that slide."
"I said I understood. I don't need it spelled out for me," I snapped.
Leo seemed taken aback by my change in attitude. It was all I could do not to sit down and scream. Instead, I folded my arms, my face impassive and stony
"Stop that," he said.
"Stop what?" I asked, scowling. "I'm not doing anything."
Leo grabbed my face, and shook it. "Stop!"
I wrapped my hands around his wrists and tried to pull his hands from my face, but he held fast. I remained mute, and he tapped my cheek with his pointer finger.
"Ruth, I'm sorry I snapped." He said, his face apologetic. "I worry about you." I pouted and said nothing. Leo growled. He walked away, hands clasped firmly behind his back. "This won't last." He said. "You're not the strong and silent type. I don't know what you think this will achieve."
I narrowed my eyes, and lifted my chin, looking away from him. I heard his shoes cross the hardwood, and a hand grabbed my face again, pulling it to look at him.
"Ruth," he said sternly. "Stop."
"You left me last night," I finally said. "I woke up and you were gone." My voice sounded soft and sad, although I meant it to come out hard.
"There was an emergency," Leo explained. "I didn't want to leave, believe me, darling girl. But I had to. I had to."
"What was the emergency?" I asked. "Who died?"
Leo shook his head, and poked my nose, the light behind his eyes flaring up again. "Nothing for you to worry about. Have you had breakfast?"
I shook my head. I wasn't hungry. My stomach twisted in knots. Leo was hiding something, something more sinister than data reconfiguration or new tech. I had a sinking feeling it involved me.
"Are you hungry?" Leo asked, taking my hand. "Are you feeling alright?" Leo pressed the back of his hand against my forehead and chest. "You're not feverish."
"I feel fine, I'm just not hungry." I said, batting his hand away.
He raked his long hair away from his face, his fingers mussing the long curls.
"If you say so. I have work to do. Come sit with me." He opened the door to his study. Leo led the way in, pulling the blanket away from the couch, and gesturing me down. I sat, and he wrapped the soft wool around my shoulders.
"There," he said. "All settled. Rest, if you can. You had a rough night."
I nodded, and snuggled down. My sense were still on high alert, and Leo's quick change in attitude wasn't helping.
"I'll be right here if you need me." He said, and kissed my temple.
Sometime during the time I was asleep, a fire was lit in the grate. I awoke to the warmth of it fanning over my face. I sat up and smiled, bringing my feet up underneath me. We had had a fire place in my home out in the suburbs, and on cold days in the fall and winter my dad would light a fire. The three of us would sit with hot chocolate or tea, all snuggled under one blanket. It was one of my happiest places, sitting hidden away from the weather in our little house. The memories made my eyes well up, and I dashed the tears away before they could spill over. The quick movement caught Leo's eye, and he looked up from his laptop.
"You were shivering in your sleep, so I lit the fire."
I raised my eyebrows at the image of Leo lighting the fire. It seemed incongruous with his image. It was such a funny juxtaposition that I snorted. "You know how to light fires?" I asked.
Leo nodded, without stopping his typing. "I learned when I was nine or ten. I used to have to light the fire in here every day before my dad came in to work."
I sobered at the thought. Leo didn't mention his father often, and when he did, it was with a sharp edge in his voice. I knew his father hadn't been good to him as as a child, and that he resented that his father's success had bankrolled his own.
A ringtone broke the silence. Leo jumped, and patted his pockets, before pulling out a sleek iPhone. "Laine," was all he said, turning in his chair so his back was to me. "It was successful?" There was silence as the person on the other end of the line relayed whatever they had called to say. I watched as Leo sat up straight in his chair, and turned to face me with a grin.
"Well, that's fantastic. It all went to plan. I'm sure it will go to hearings very soon."
He dropped the phone on his desk, and stood, hands on his hips. "Is there any better feeling than knowing something you have planned went off right?" he asked. "That's what I live for, baby."
Leo poured himself a glass of dark amber liquid from the table on the edge of the room, looking pensively into it. He tapped his fingers on the cut crystal, deep in thought.
I didn't want to interrupt his thinking, so I sat still and watched him. He mouthed a soundless conversation, reminding me how smart he actually was. He had to be well above a genius level IQ, judging by how successful his company was and how much he had accomplished.
"Hmm," he pulled himself out of his reverie and focused his gaze on me. It was hot and intense, and I shrank back a little. "I would do anything for you, you know that, right darling? Anything." He came to stand in front of the roaring fire, his back to me.
"I know, Leo," I said. "You've told me."
"This was my father's' room." He continued, seeming not to have heard me. "I used to sit right where you are now. He would try to teach me how hard life had been for him when he was young."
I wanted to reach up and take his hand, but something inside me warned me to stay put.
"I learned fast. There was no one to save me, no god or man came to intervene. So I took matters into my own hands. I don't regret it, Ruth, not for an instant. And seeing you here reminds me of how terrible it is to have all this power and do nothing with it."
I stood, and wrapped my arms around him. He seemed tense, but he relaxed into it, resting his hand on the back of my head.
"You haven't done nothing. You saved me," I said. I let go, and leaned back to look up at him. His face was taut and sad, and he looked older. "Besides, that weight shouldn't be on your shoulders, Leo. You aren't responsible for anyone but yourself."
He shook his head emphatically. "I've already started playing the game, Ruth. It's all up to me. I push the little pawns around, and at the end, instead of winning the game, I crush the king."
I frowned, and stepped farther away, the heat from the fire spreading dampness up my spine. "What do you mean, 'crush the king'?"
Leo shook his head again, and poured the rest of the alcohol in his mouth. He smelled of liquor and something dark. "It's an expression, Ruth. I'm not a murderer."
I shivered, despite the heat of the flames. His voice said one thing. His tone and his body language said something completely different. Again, he reminded me how smart, how powerful he was. He owned the government. He controlled half the senate, and he could influence trade and economy with one phone call.
"I…" I was speechless. Leo took my wrist, and spun me away from the fire. The fire outlined him in red, silhouetted against the glow. There was a tension in the room, between us, and I closed my eyes against it.
"Don't look away from me," he whispered. I opened my eyes, meeting his burning gaze. "Don't ever look away from me, Ruth. Don't ever be afraid of me."
I was all too aware of the heat and the pain in my leg and the fact that I hadn't eaten since supper the night before. My legs gave way beneath me, but before I could hit the ground, Leo caught me.
"Careful, now," he said, lowering me to the plush carpet.
"Please, I need air." The hot air seared my nose and throat.
Leo looped a hand under my arms and picked me up. The room was spinning around me, and black spots clouded my vision. I heard, not saw, the study door open with a bang, and then we were downstairs and out into the cool, rainy air. I took a deep breath, the freshness soothing and pure.
"Put me down?" I asked, and Leo lowered me to my feet. We were standing on a wooden porch, facing rose bushes.
"It's beautiful," I breathed.
"Yes," Leo said from behind me. "Beautiful."
I turned a little, looking up over my shoulder at him.
"You're getting all wet," I laughed. The rain had soaked his hair, so it was hanging straight down to his collar. I blinked a few water droplets from my eyelashes, and he smiled, reaching over to wipe them from my face.
"So are you." He pushed a strand of hair behind my ear. There was a brief pause. Leo stared at me, his hand hovering near my face. I searched his face, opened my mouth to ask him what he was doing. Just as quickly, he recoiled, and pushed hands through his hair.
"I have to go to town tomorrow," he said. "There's been an issue with one of my men."
"Okay."
"I want you to come with me," Leo said earnestly. "You don't have to do anything. Come and stay in my office. Spend some time with my assistant." He dropped his hands, twisting his white and black ring.
"Is it such a good idea?" I asked. "For me to be back there so soon?"
Leo nodded. "We're going to the island office, not the mainland one. You'll love downtown."
"I have been here before, you know," I told him. "I existed before I met you."
"Right," Leo said, a faint tinge of pink appearing high on his cheekbones.
I blinked, and smiled slowly. I decided not to tease him any more-he may be a grown man, but inside I knew he was an emotionless wreck. I didn't want to ruin the moment. "Wake me when we have to go," I said. "I assume I won't be alone tonight."
I was resigned to the fact, and I knew there was no way Leo would back down from the deal we had reached.
"No. Not for a second." Leo took my hand in his, and lead me back indoors. I took a deep breath of the heady, flowery air, and followed him.