… I fine my situation stupid. I don't know why, but I feel like I'll be bringing trouble to Fuji's family. What's worse is the fact any moment they can actually destroy my soul, making me unable to find out the truth.
Despite how much I want to find out the truth about my death, I'm clueless to where to start. Sadly, no one explained to me that once you turn into a ghost you'll lose all your memories. I recall people's face, but any sort of memory with them, I can hardly remember. Which is why I thought I was heading to take my examination, but who would have thought, something else happened… Bring us to where I am now. A lonely ghost.
Was I ever this lonely? I mean, I was surrounded by my family, friends, and the person whom I hold dear in my heart. So why is my death so lonely and here I am now wondering why I become such a being.
Ren looked at the dark clouds in the night sky, her heart felt so heavy, as if her heart was soul turning to stone.
��Do ghosts, even have a heart?"
It made her wonder yet in the end she didn't bother to ponder on it long for she'll never understand a ghost's characteristic.
"I wonder how my parents are? Mom really looked sick earlier as if she hasn't slept for days."
As she continues to think about the recent events that had happened, she did not sense that someone was checking on her from afar.
"Why did you ask Fuji to take care of such a creature, she should have just been destroyed."
"My-my, where is all this hatred coming from?"
It was the elder who was discussing and watching over the girl. They were curious as to whether she had listened to them and stayed or left. But to their surprise, they saw the girl just sitting by the temple whilst gazing at the night sky.
"You can't see how terrible she has lived her life, if she continues to wander in our world, she'll be hunted by them." The old man couldn't be at ease as he saw such a terrible experience the girl has gone through. It may have been brief, but it brought such goosebumps that he fears once she remembers them, she'll turn into a vengeful ghost.
"I know, but still, that child has done nothing wrong. Plus, her brother is dying from losing her." Her gaze softens as she watches the lonely girl all alone and the young man staying with them. "Kenji is so pitiful, to think he'll never know that his sister has been worried for him all along and is here by his side."
"He shall never know. Our kind must never mingle with each other, yet you asked our grandson to take care of her." He despises such ideas, to think the old lady has brought calamity to their grandson.
"Hush now, what are you talking about. Your family has been mingling with them for generations."
"But we destroy them, not help them see the light."
"But, she is someone special we can't just turn our back on."
He couldn't argue with her furthermore, for in the end, he'll have to admit defeat or else he'll be sleeping somewhere else tonight and not in the comfort of his wife.
"You may be blind, but you sure can see better than me."
"Hmm, I am your wife, of course I can see things better than you."
The old lady left, without hearing what her husband had to reply. She knows her husband well and she was sure he'll be smiling by what she just said.
"Yeah-yeah, you're my wife." He smiled as he continued to gaze on the young lady all alone.
Time passes and the girl doesn't realize at all that the old man has appeared in front of him.
"Elder, what are you doing here?"
"Hmm, I was just checking on things." He replied, not being honest of his true intention.
"Ah- I didn't expect you'll have to work so late at night as well." She innocently replied not seeing through his intention.
'To think you're this innocent, yet you went through such a terrible life.' He observed the girl as he cleared his throat and replied, "Well, since some of my students are away, I must check on things myself."
"Wow, I didn't expect you to have students studying under you."
"Hmm, don't be too impressed. They are people like you…"
"What do you mean?"
He didn't reply right away and looked at the girl in the eyes. 'They went through…' He thought hard before what he wanted to say and said, "They had… nevermind."
"I see, I won't ask." Ren realizes that what he couldn't see might affect her feelings. She didn't know whether she should be grateful or sad that he was being considerate towards her. "May I ask something instead?"
"What is it?"
Ren was hesitant and she was mumbling whilst she asked the question. "You know, ghost, I mean, spirits, do-do, we have a…"
"A heart?"
"Ah- was I that obvious?" She smile embarrassedly and she tried to avert her gaze away from him.
"Hmm, you don't but still you can feel such emotions."
"So that's why… but, why does my heart feel so heavy as if…"
"That's because your a vengeful ghost. It sounds horrible despite you haven't done anything, but you are classified as one."
"But, I never plan to hurt anyone, I just wish to find out what happened to me."
"Hmm, you may have not done anything yet, but still… before your…" He paused as she sensed something odd in the air. He watches the girl who was eagerly anticipating what he has to say. 'Ah, she doesn't know it yet…'
"Forget I said anything, rest now. The sun will soon rise and if you don't rest and forget everything, you'll continue to feel that burden."
"Wait, what do you mean forget."
He sighs as he answers her, "As the day passes, you'll soon forget everything that happens to you. Slowly, you'll forget your memory."
"Does that mean I haven't lost my memory, then, but why can't I remember them."
"That's because you're a ghost. Your memories have been locked to prevent you from doing unnecessary things."
If a ghost could turn pale she would have already. She did not expect it would be that simple. That reason why she couldn't remember anything is so she won't seek revenge if someone did kill her.
"So, that's why ghosts are easily able to cross the light."
"Hmm, since they are unable to remember anything, they don't hold any regret and wish to pass through life peacefully."
"Am I an exception then, was I able to recall my memory and unable to see the light."
"Your case is different," He sighs and scratches his head, he didn't expect he'll be talking to the girl so comfortable and that time has passed so much. "Enough with the questions and get some rest."
"Ah, I'm sorry to have taken too much of your time Elder. Please, have a good rest."
"Hmm, then, I'll be going."