I came to the track straight from Ascot's house. I changed in the public bathrooms that they never lock. I raced through my stretches and started running as quickly as possible.
I shouldn't have eaten so much. It will take a week to run it all off. Everyone says I don't eat enough but I eat too much. Carbs and sugars are my demons. They haunt you for the rest of your life. They never leave you once you let them sink in. I already gaged myself in the bathroom. At this rate I'll be running all night.
I can't believe I told Ascot about my lineage. I have never told anyone. I'm not proud of it, but I don't let it defy me. As soon as I am old enough and am responsible enough, I'll become a safe haven worker. I'll take care of children that are dropped off at fire stations until they find a foster family or a forever home. I'll be the middleman, like someone was for me. I'm grateful to whomever that person may be. I owe them a lot. They brought me to my parents now.
Emma. Their daughter's name was Emma. They have never told me how she died. I've never asked. It's a very sensitive subject for them. They always tell me that they wouldn't change a thing if it meant not having adopted me, but I doubt that sometimes. Especially on her birthday.
I love my parents. They are the best. Of course, I call them mom and dad because what else would I call them. If I had been adopted when I was older maybe not, but I never knew my birth mother. I don't think I want to know her now. Or ever. She left me. She didn't want me. Why should I want her in my life? She chose herself over me. She chose a life without me in it therefore she has no place in mine.
I never want to know her name. I never want to see her face. I don't even want to know if I look more like my father or more like my mother.
My dad. I never found out why he didn't want me. I sometimes wonder if her even knew I existed. Did he even know my mother? Was it a one-nightstand? How old were my parents? I guess I'll never know.