June 24, 2010
*Blackdown castle, Southern Russia
"You should be happy for Leo, for heaven's sake, he's your brother!", Avril nods towards my brother as he slips through the doors of the ballroom, fist clutched with a grim frown plastered across his face. Another argument with my half brother triggers my cousin yet again.
Avril's escort was already halfway across the room, dancing with another upscale lady, Avril's coat she asked him to hold was hanging across a chair. I didn't even bother letting her know. It wasn't worth seeing her blow up and then crash the whole ballroom dance before the new female exchanges would arrive for my older brother's liking. He would pretend to love both of them and then break the other one's heart with a simple rejection. My brother Leo knew the drill.
The next queen of Blackdown must be wealthy, her family must have power, brains and be a lethal loyal young woman. Her beauty must unlike any mediocre woman. She doesn't have be perfect, but at least close enough.
As for me, this was as far as I would ever get in life. Hanging around with my younger cousin and watching my brother own the world. I would never be able to marry. It was a rule, the stepchild or secondborn royal mustn't marry or bear children. He or she becomes nothing but a high-class nanny for their sibling's kids. What fun.
"Avril, it was just a brotherly thing, we just need time.", My voice softened as she glided close to me, the tip of her nose lightly red, matching her blush. She'd grown so much since our first ballroom party. She was more of a sibling to me than my brother ever had been. It was always "Leo this" and "Leo that" with my "Supportive" father. Never once Draco. Avril had lost her parents when she was young to food poisoning by rouges. It was only fair if I gave her my protection and friendship.
"I hope so, Drac.", The next thing I know, she's looped her arm through mine, a family gesture. Something we've done since we were six. Since she cried in my arms. Since she lost everything to my stepfather's foolish ploy to gain power.
"Why don't you hang out with your boyfriend?"
Her eyes roam about the giant elegantly designed room, golden decorations hung from every corner of the room, drawing attention to wolf-headed scones on every wall, an orange unnatural light beaming from their flame. The room smelt of mothballs and a mix of every nameable perfume, what I imagined of the castles on Masterpiece. I can't help but stuff my hands into my pockets, expecting for Avril to land her gaze on her date.
"No."
She shook her head, running her fingers down the sides of her teal dress that really brought out her ginger hair and brown eyes, purchased from the nearest seamstress shop in human town before mother began her rampage, ordering more decorations than she could actually afford. The bottom of the dress resembled a rose in mid bloom. Father, as usual, wasn't here. He somewhere making special plans for his godsent son.
The son who would actually do something for him to be proud of. The future king.
"Oh."
A thin smile appeared on her face, "It seems like you're trying to get away from me."
"No, it's more of the crowd, I've never found solace in them."
It's a deep understand between us. She knows why I want to get away from the ballroom.
"I guess that Auntie Rose might need my help in the great hall, preparing the surprise flavor cartons, you know how much I love those.", Her voice trails off when she punched me in the shoulder, barely evoking any pain, "And since you didn't have the guts to tell me that my escort was dancing with another fair lady guest of his liking, fetch my coat."
She waves back at me, a mischievous glare in her gaze, "I'll save some lemon drops."
"And no fireballs, you know they give me heartburn."
I watched her walk through those doors, fighting the urge to reach out when I had the chance and tell her nevermind. My strange habit got the best of me and the time I should have spent with those who meant the most to me. I waited after the giant white doors swung open to make sure it didn't admit Father or Leo, but it only revealed a man dressed to nines with a camera hanging from his neck. I'm sure they would punish me for sneaking off. The crazy thing is that my younger brother can punish me. Because I'm not the King's blood son.
I push away the embarrassment of bowing to my kid brother. Soon, he'll be the most powerful man in this part of the country and maybe even more. It was no hiding how ambitious he could be. And he wanted a woman that could match that amount of authority.
A young man strolls towards me with a golden tray laden with sparkling cider- Leo's favorite drink - and hors oeuvres. His eyes sparkle in the natural dull light. I don't who he is but his face gives away his age. It's clear he's younger than both me and my brother. Plump cheeks and dark eyes. Short and chubby. Ah great, I'll never get out of here.
"Your royal highness, may I delight you with any refreshments or snacks?", He cheerfully greeted me, the tag on his suit revealed that his name was "Alexzander".
"Nah, I'm stuffed but I guess...a glass of sparkling cider won't kill me, don't you think., good sir?"
The boy, no older than thirteen, shook his head in response when I reached for the cider in the left glass, a cherry on a fancy stick in the glass. Taking a swig from it, Alexander took a small bow before heading towards a group of well dressed women who whispered among each other, pointing to the handmade crimson wolf-headed banners. One of the family guardians. My brother's guardian. Felix.
I didn't have a guardian to protect me and walk by my side when I was young, but Leo had Felix, the family guardian wolf. So I was bitter about it. That's when I finally found out that I actually had one all along. Not the Guardian you'd expect. Before the true powers were stolen from my people centuries ago, every royalleaf had a soul beast, and excess to magic greater that the born strengths.
Shoving my way through the crowd, I finally make it to the side door, away from the clashing aromas and classical music. The door opened and the fresh hallway air consumed me like it always had, chasing away the heavy atmosphere. It doesn't take long until my eyes adjust to the dark hallway, scarlet walls, and matching carpet. Bookshelves from uncountable years line the walls. Even though the books are vastly older than I am, I've read every one of them in my seventeen years of living. This my little piece of paradise. The only place I feel at peace. If I can't live my own life, I'll live someone else's.
The door closed behind me, with a satisfying squeak. Suddenly, the electric light popped on, they were previously added by my mother, who thought that it was okay for me to have my own personal space. She is more supportive than father. He didn't really appreciate the idea but it was nothing he could do about it by the time everything in the room was dusted, repaired, and organized with some of my favorite things. She knew that I needed space and a place to find myself. Mother didn't understand the pain of being born without independence but she didn't profess to. My real father was killed in battle. It was a secret relationship that went on without the king's knowledge. When I look at him, I know he's the one that sent my father to his death on the frontlines. She knows the pain of being punished just for falling in love.
I know the same could happen to me. But this time, I'll be the dead one. I'm not his son or blood. He'll watch me die and feel absolutely nothing. No regret or not guilt. He'll feel the same emotions when squashing a bug.
"Draco, my child, shouldn't you be enjoying the party instead of hanging out with this old clump of stone?"
All bad thoughts disappeared as soon as the deep rough female voice filled the air. The wisest guardian I know. One of the only friends I'll ever have in my lifetime. She may be a statue, but she's my best friend. Her knowledge surpassed any book I could pull off the oak wood shelves in this room.
I grin and make my way over to the left of the corridor, where a giant statue in the shape of a majestic lioness stood upon a pedestal made of the same dull grey stone as the rest of her body. Except for her yellow sunlit eyes and the assorted jewels that hung from her throat. Her claws white and massive.
It was hard to know how she was feeling when she wasn't speaking, but this time her presents said it all. It was a vast weighting joy that hung around the room. Light and warm like early spring.
"Huntress, you know that I wouldn't leave you alone on a night like this, you've always been here for me, so I'll be here for you."
It was true. It was her who had saved mother and me from the king's wrath. Of course, before it was time for her to retire, she had been my mother's loyal guardian. The best guardian. I remember when mother would come to this room just to speak to her old friend. They would talk for hours until my stepfather barged in, demanding that she quit talking to a rock. Now, Queen Rose almost never came, obeying Aries's selfish and cruel laws he set out of malice.
Dropping down on my knees, my arms wrapped around the cold stone that made up her forearm, sitting close on the smooth pedestal. A small purr vibrated her stone body, moving all the way to mine. It was a special feeling. A feeling that made me not feel alone in this big world. Huntress wasn't alone and neither was I.
"You know just how to make an old lioness feel like she's still important to someone."
Reaching under the nearest bookshelf, under two leather-bound novels covered in dust lay separated from all the others, the inside pages starting to unravel from the threads in the inside which held it together. They smelt of a thick musky scent like the courtyard after a good long rain mixed with the earthy ground. The one underneath, a diary made of two old torn backings and thin shoelaces from Aries's favorite riding boots. I'd put it together myself when I was only twelve, gathering ideas and stories of my own based on nothing but fantasies of a greater life I could only dream of.
Tales of the lion people who basked under the blazing sun to rid themselves of the spots that had once made them leopards. A rose made of glass that makes young lovers turn into statues upon touching it. A castle that touches the heavens above, the stake surrounded clouds against a painted sky where everyone lives forever.
They filled me with a blazing fire every time my quill touched the thin beige page from the upper library on the west end of the castle, allowing anything that came from my head no matter how exciting and wild they could get.
"Are you going to share your new tale with me, or do I have wait a bit longer?"
"I finished it last night while you slept, I hope you like it.", I smile, knowing that the party behind those doors couldn't compare to this quiet paradise. My new anecdote had taken me days, my dream fading back in forth in my mind, the one that inspired this writing. Word for word on the paper, spilling from my mind into written words.
Cracking opened the crinkled pages covered in cursive from the header to the bottom, some of the black ink smeared lightly. But I saw much more than just words, but events that happened in another realm tucked under the starlight core of my soul, intertwined in my spirit.
The smell of the sea weighted on the girl's soul
her eyes like twin black zircon stones in
snow.
A boy, not native to the sea wished for nothing
more than the days when his simple life
was right in his fingertips.