When Atlas finally let him go, Laris smiled one last time at his mate before he trekked the woods into the direction of border. That was where he planned to go first and wait winter out.
The piles of snow crunched beneath his foot. With a now healed body, the distance he covered in a short amount of time was enough to keep out of Atlas' range of smell.
There was no sound in the white-washed woods save for his breaths, and the echoing cries of his wolf inside his mind.
'How could you leave our mate behind?! Why would you leave him?!' His wolf howled in indignation and grief.
Laris stopped moving altogether, his head bent so low that his expression couldn't be made out.
'Did your dream and ambition weigh more than our mate? Do they matter more to you?'
"Father asked me before: 'What have you sacrificed for change, Laris?'" Laris whispered to nobody. He tilted his head up and stared at the gloomy sky in between the evergreen trees.
"I blamed the Lycan Kingdom for my mother's death, but I never really did anything to change how things were until he asked me that question. Really, what have I sacrificed?" Laris' question reverberated around the woods. Unfortunately, no one could answer it.
"I thought I have given up a lot of big things and a number of friends and people before. All in order to change something." He paused, then shouted, "I was wrong!"
In the silence that followed, his wolf asked again, 'For the sake of that change, was it worth leaving our mate?'
"No", Laris crumbled down and gasped in a breath to relieve his aching heart.
'Then why did you leave him?' His wolf could no longer do anything but cry with the pain it felt radiating from Laris' heart. Even without Laris' response, it knew the answer.
"Because I love him."
In this short amount of time that they've been together, he couldn't help but love that silly thing that always clumsily tried to take care of him as if he was the most fragile thing it had encountered in his life. He loved the way he'd look aggrieved when Laris didn't quite follow what he wanted, or the way he'd pout when he woke up and Laris wasn't in the nest bed. He'd be upset for a day if he wasn't the one making Laris' breakfast. Atlas' embrace; his kisses, his bites and honest feelings. He'd never find any river as clear as those cerulean eyes. He'd never find another like Atlas. Indeed, his wolf had found him the most compatible person for his mate.
At his confession, his wolf finally quietened, leaving Laris to mourn his loss, that which he made with his own decision. His wolf knew more clearly than anybody else, of course. Like their mother that tried to flee the Lycan Kingdom to protect her children, it knew that Laris wanted to protect his mate by running away as well. If someone knew that he had a mate, they would try to use this weakness on him. He couldn't bear to put his mate in danger.
Change? Laris no longer cared for change and ambition. He wanted to give it all up, but if he selfishly did, how many lives would be forfeited? How many deaths would he be responsible for? How many hateful eyes would stare at him with blame and regret for having followed him? Followed him for what? For nothing??
Unexpectedly, the change that he was looking forward to all his life was not the change he encountered—
A change of heart.
Laris had no qualms in using Letitia, Tukare, or even Videre and their powers when making plans or escape plans. Of course, he cared for their safety as they were his family, but he always kept in mind their ability and emotional state whenever he made plans.
According to his old personality, he would have done the same with Atlas, his mate. But just the idea of it had Laris rejecting it so thoroughly. He was reluctant. He just couldn't do it. His reality and ideals were so far apart that he could not see a single visible commonality. He became extremely illogical.
So what if Atlas was a Wendigo? What if he was stronger than Laris? So maybe he could be the greatest asset he had in this rebellion—what of it?
Laris didn't think his heart could take it if something happened to Atlas, that silly thing.
Quietly, Laris got up. He patted the snow on his pants, blotches of melted snow staining the fabric. It did not matter even if this rebellion proved hard, or if he developed Mulier Morbus because of this. He will never expose Atlas, even if that meant breaking his word and never coming back.
"I'm sorry", Laris uttered, before he started trekking towards his destination once more.
On the other hand, Atlas stood still by the entrance of his cave lair. A small pile of snow stacked upon his head and shoulders. He'd been standing there unmovingly ever since Laris left.
When the snow on his head became so heavy that it fell, he finally remembered. Laris asked him to make breakfast. He definitely knew how! He learned it quite well just so he can serve Laris breakfast on late mornings!
Atlas bustled all over the cave, stoking the fire and gathering the cooking pot Laris found somewhere in his stash. He previously didn't know how to use or what for were the other things that his mother left him. When he passed by the nest, Atlas' body stopped. He took a whiff of Laris' lingering scent.
Ah, this couldn't be. He needed to make breakfast for Laris! How could he idle away like this?
Atlas gathered food enough for two and began cooking the simplest meal he had been taught. When he finished, he plated Laris' meal first, before eating his share.
A certain amount of time passed, and the meal had turned cold. Atlas stared at the entrance of his cave.
He'd be back. He'd definitely be back. He said he'd back so I'd just have to wait for him.
With this in mind, Atlas cleaned up after himself while saving Laris meal. He didn't have the heart to eat it, nor throw it away, so he left it at the flat-top boulder that they used as a table. On it were a few other materials that Laris used in tinkering a few things as well sewing their coats.
Atlas unconsciously grabbed the coat he wore. He walked over to the entrance of his cave and waited, staring at the direction that Laris left.
He had faith in his mate. Laris said to wait for him so he will wait. He thought his home was also lucky as it brought him his mate. He only needed to stay here and good things will definitely come.
Even so, Atlas continued to wait until the afternoon came and until the sun had set. When the sky had turned dark and Laris had not come back, he'd thought that it would probably take a longer time. Thus, Atlas dived into the nest and comforted his lonely heart with the lingering scent of his mate.
Was his home always this quiet? Somehow, it lacked the quiet sounds of someone's soft breathing.
On the next morning, Atlas made breakfast again for two. The previously meal spoiled overnight so he had to begrudgingly throw it away. He washed the wares as he was taught and plated Laris' meal. He quickly ate his share. The food that Laris had piled for him would last him for a long while so he did not feel the need to hunt.
With nothing left to do, Atlas once again resumed his place by the cave lair's entrance and sat down. He sat so still for a long period of time that snow piled on him. His lack of movement even let the other creatures that didn't hibernate to not notice his presence.
When a bush rustled from the direction where Laris left, Laris stood up. His abrupt movement startled the critter scavenging for food and dashed away, squeaking in fright.
It wasn't Laris. Laris hadn't come back yet. Atlas was utterly disappointed. He stood there for long time, longingly staring at the bush, hoping for Laris to appear instead of that critter.
A cold feeling trailed down his cheeks. Atlas looked up. Albeit the sky looking gloomy, it wasn't snowing at all. He shifted his eyes back to the same direction. He couldn't miss it if Laris came back. He wanted to see him at first glance and then have his mate praise him for doing a good job at 'waiting'. But...
Why was Laris taking so long? Laris—why isn't he here yet? Did he go to a very far place? He hadn't been gone this long before. How longer did he need to wait? He needed him right now. He needed to ask—
Why did rain keep pouring out of his eyes?