So I have this guys best friend thing also fuck buddies maybe with a guy I've known since kindergarten
The problem here though is he's basically like perfect at least to me he's nice treats me kindly listens to when I'm down let's me blow up at him and then help me figure out what's wrong and everything but we aren't ever gonna be together
I know this cause I'm unloveable I deep down believe this cause I should be blowing up at him I shouldn't make him help me I shouldn't make him feel he needs to be there for me I'm just gonna hurt him like the last guy cause I can't control myself
And above all this even tho I'm unlovable I've fallen for him like hard me and him joke around about dateing but he only adores me and he's even said he won't say the l word cause it's not true and I'm not as dumb as I think but that just proves I'm unlovable
I hate myself for everything yet i dont know how to fix myself or get help cause I'm also scared so I guess it's better to be heartbroken than hurt him right