"But, the love that I made her felt is not that enough for her to stay with me. I don't know where I lacked towards her. I don't even know if the love that she gave me is really true and, pure or it's just sympathy because, she knew that I loved her."
He said as he was still staring at the whole darkness but it was lightning by the shining stars and the bright moon with the help of those street lights too.
So, it was confirmed that he looked wasted not because of some sort of problem in the company but because he is really broken-hearted?
I stayed silent as he was breaking down already. Well even me, I can't believe that Eli did what he ever did to my brother. And maybe I no longer know what to do if there will be a chance that we will get along with.
"Maybe she just felt sorry for me because the affection that I showered into her that's why she stayed up too long, She felt sorry because I love her."
She said and I can't feel anything but to worry and feel the pain that he is experiencing right now too, so I decided to speak already.
"You mean, she is just guilty, that is why she stayed with you that long?" I asked and he glanced at me already with still sadness written on his eyes.
"Maybe?" He said as he drank the wine from the wine bottle again. I fix how I sit in a comfortable position as I do the Indian sit position on this sofa and lean my back on and stare at the clear but dark sky.
"How did you find out about that thing?" I asked after I sighed deeply and I heard him chuckled without humor.
"Funny how the way I found it, because imagine? The day after we bought a gift for her and the day that I was about to give her that damn expensive gift. I saw her kissing his ex boyfriend Lei, he cheated on me do I deserve to be cheated like that baby? Am I really not enough?"
He said as he started now to burst out as the tears from his eyes were already starting to slide from his soft but hard featured face.
I immediately opened my arms for him to feel my warmth because even though I did not really feel the pain he was feeling right now.
I can still feel the pain and betrayal that he felt because the girl he loved just did an act that was never considered to be a good act inside our family.
He still was now crying with a low sound as he was throwing out the feelings he had inside of his heart. Luckily that even though he loved to intimidate people around he was not still the violent one who walked threw things around and broke them.
"Captain Lick," I said softly while he was hugging me while I was caressing his back.
I know that he is soft sometimes but he looks scary if he is serious, he is the kind of possessive or territorial guy too as I saw how he treated Ely, but love and adoration were still visible on his face if he was doing that because of some jealousy sometimes.
A typical ideal type of woman sometimes. Hard but soft towards the woman they loved.
"You are awared, right? that no one deserved to be cheated? And you are already more enough than the average one, Cap. But there will always be a time that you will never be enough to the wrong person. Because if you are already in the right person, even if you have a lot of shortcomings, she will fully accept you no matter what."
I said with a comforting tone because it was my first time seeing him mentally breaking down because of a woman or she was still considered a woman because according to our teacher, there is a difference between a Girl and a woman , same as a boy and man.
And the word that I said to him was what I learned from a certain book I have read ago and it's kinda relaxing. He moved away from our hugging position as my oldest brother stared directly at me and smiled slightly.
I knew he was old enough to have a matured mindset but sometimes we don't really know why is the right thing to do if we are already clouded and wasted. And I knew that I will experience this kind of feeling too, in the future?
Hoping not.
"Did you talk to her already? Heard her explanation or just one sided and you just believe it in your eyes?"
I asked with an accusing tone as he leaned his back on the sofa again and looked up and the sky welcomed his eyes the same as mine who were staring at them, peacefully.
"You talked to her? Yes? Or you just judged her and left them dumbfounded?" I asked and I heard him breathe deeply before he spoke.
And he mentioned earlier that it was the day after we bought the necklace gift for her. I was there when we bought that and Lick even asked for help from me to choose, so that day is when we arrived at the resort maybe?
My gosh, so he did not go for us just to attend a very heartbreaking and betrayal scene? Well everything's happens for a reason but, if he went with us. Still his mind could not calm if he is worrying with Ely.
"Don't need an explanation, when I eavesdropped already she said the phrase, 'just wait honey, I'll find a way on how to break up with that feeling pilot Cruz and he has never been enough for me. He is too stupid idiot and you are better'"
He said as he tried to mimic Ely's words maybe? as he continued to speak, "Tell me Lei, are those words not enough to understand as I saw her kiss him after saying those destructive ego words?" He said and damn that must be painful then.
I was shocked upon what I heard because I thought that Ely is a fine woman enough for my brother because frin her acts and gesture, she screams elegance like our mother and she is pretty too, and I never expect her to be like that but still.
"But you should have a talk to her, maybe closure or to ask her formally about what your eyes see and what your ears heard." I said trying to convince him that he needed to still communicate to Ely because maybe something is up or what.
"But yeah, if I saw it and I just have a one side mindset, neither, I can't believe it either, my gosh." I exclaimed and I noticed that somehow he was already in a calm mode.
"Yeah me too," he said as he wet hisblips using his tongue. " I never expected her to do an act like that which is called cheating." He uttered and emotions were still visible on his voice and face as he drank again.
"That's explained now why everyday, I feel like I am lacking?" He said and gazed at me and my face softened upon looking at him. "I feel like I am lacking, I am being irresponsible to her while chasing my dreams and I am lacking for her because all this time, he wants something different already. He wants to and he is loving someone already."
He said but I can feel that what he is feeling right now was kinda lighter than earlier. Peace of mind was attacking him already maybe by just telling what he really feels.
"That's absurd, seeing the person you loved falling to another or the same guy he loved before," I said and he nodded.
"Maybe I hold me that tight to the point that she got tired? So she decided to be pulled by someone for me to loosen my grip on her and that made her fall to that someone."
He said with a pain in his voice like he was regretting, yes he is kinda possessive but I thought they can handle that already?
"But is it more fine to talk to that matter first before pulling others to your situation because you know, communication is the key?" I said trying to lessen the pain he was feeling.
"But, I was busy reaching my goals and dreams so we have no formal time for that communication you are referring to," He reasoned out and I sighed about that.
Yeah, he is right. But everyone is always busy in terms of reaching their goals in life right? It just or it depends on the person that they have a relationship on how they handle and make it more stronger.
It depends on how they will solve a problem regarding that and how is the way of their thinking or how is their mindset on how to support them. But I guess on my brother, Lick's situation, it failed. Or something?