Chapter 9 - My demons

Ein's POV:

"Zane!" I shouted as he fell limb to the ground, like a rag doll. I picked him up with ease to a bridal position, and as we were right outside the nursery I opened the door with my shoulder so as to not to disturb Zane. "Venera! He's having a panic attack!" I yelled.

Venera turned around stopping treating Finn and looked at Zane's trembling figure, eyes wide open but clearly not awake.

"Ein, this is bad. Two patients... I don't have enough medical supply for both of them! I know how to cure Finn, but I can't take my eyes away from her and leave her alone to just treat another guy who's name I don't even know!"

"But isn't that what doctors are supposed to do Venera?!"

"Yes! But not at the same time! These two are suffering, and I don't even know that whatever bit Finn is poisonous or not! Or if this guy has PTSD! Tell me how am I going to know that, with to patients, not enough medical help or supplies and with the clock ticking?!"

I kept my mouth shut, all of their suffering is because of me. I don't... I'm not sure what to do...

"I'll help you with Zane, just explain to me what I have to do." I said softly, hurt cursing my eyes as guilt swept into my gut. I want to help... I needed to.

Venera narrowed her eyes at me suspiciously , clearly not believing me. But then a blood curdling scream echoed through the room, Finn's body started spamming out, her back arched as if she was invertedly folding herself in half, most of the upper and lower halves of her body separated from the medical bed.

The screaming continued as Venera tried to reach out to Finn, trying so desperately to bring her back to reality, but her screams drowned out our own as tears streamed down her pale face, her eyes once a beautiful honey color, free and living, had become so corrupted with fear they were no longer recognizable.

Is this because of me?

Another high-pitch screams came out of Finn's mouth

What have I done?

Venera was not letting her go, she started strapping Finn's limbs to the medical bed, which just resulted in Finn screaming even more...

This is all my fault...

Finn's back began to arch yet again, as if grabbing a second wind.

...I'm sorry...

Suddenly, she flopped back onto the medical bed, no more screaming, nor moving, nor breathing...

Venera quickly checked the pulse on Finn's neck, having to assure herself that Finn was not dead.

She... she couldn't be dead, she was strong... When I had first met her, she was literally the definition of survival. She has gone through so much... and yet I make her live like this...

"Hey..." Venera had touched my shoulder slightly, making me flinch at the sudden touch. "She's gonna be fine, something stopped her sudden... reaction, for a lack of better words."

"Do you know what happened to her? Is there any reason for her to suddenly spring up like that?" I asked, genuinely concerned for her.

"Well, no. You had told me before that some dark figure had taken some blood away from her, which in full honesty is not very descriptive, her body should have not spasmed like that..."

"I'm sorry, that's the only thing I could see..." I tried to reason, but I just felt as if they were excuses.

Venera sighed before continuing. "It's fine, I know that you are trying to change and... I can honestly tell you that you did the right thing by rushing them here, I appreciate that..."  she smiled slightly at me, bringing an odd sense of comfort, however it got me to smile.

Now I don't usually smile unless they are sarcastic or contain any malicious intent, this was the first time in a long time that I actually felt myself at peace...

"Now..." I started to speak. "What about Zane?" His name rolling off my tongue so nicely, somehow his name brought me comfort, even as he sleeps I feel him with me.

"Hmmm, you said he had started shaking uncontrollably and he seems unfocused, right?" Venera asked me while looking at Zane and getting closer to his medical bed.

"I mean yeah... after I lost my cool I had called him something completely outrageous, b-but I didn't mean it! I was just so damn angry, I wanted to get it out before I took a more physical stance..." Ein's eyes travelled towards the ground, guilt eating him through the inside out. He had hurt someone that he cared for... why was this so hard?

"Then, it all checks out, Zane suffers from PTSD... something must've had scarred him terribly to have that much of a reaction with one simple word..." Venera placed her palm gently over Zane's forehead, his skin was glistening with sweat, thousands of small freckles infested the porcelain like skin, his skin soft to the touch, comforting despite his cold behaviour and deep voice... How could I have done this to him? He deserves the world... he deserves someone better...

"Ein?" Venera barely touches my shoulder, breaking me away from my troubled thoughts. " I understand this may not be the best situation for your mental health, however I need you here now with me to help your friend, or whatever you two are I don't judge, because now you want to make things right after years of undeniable pressure and confusion. Please, stay here where we need you... where he needs you, because right now you're all he has." Venera did not hold back, making Ein want to crawl into a hole and never come out. But what she said was true.

He had to repair what he had broken, and that would start by fixing both Zane and Finn, he would sacrifice everything he had created to repair what he had broken, no matter the cost...

"I'm sorry, again, you're right. What can I do?" Ein asked as he looked up to Venera, eyes filled with determination.

Venera raised an eyebrow surprised by his reaction, while still wary of Ein she knew she would have to trust him, she was truly worried about Finn's condition and if Zane was not properly taken care of he could jump back into another panic attack. Venera sighed through her nose, this would be a loooonnng day...

"Alright, you can stay here looking over him, you shouldn't touch him because we have no idea what kind of reaction his body might have or it might take him to another attack. If you can, I would suggest trying to make yourself appear as calm and as unthreatening as possible 'cause when he wakes up he will need some sort of comfort. Now, I'll look over Finn, maybe now that she's out I might be able to find whatever's going on with her, I'll update you if anything goes wrong." Venera explained as she opened a small closet that led to another small clinic.

She went into the room for a moment before bringing in a wheelchair and putting it next to Finn's bed, she then picked the slighter shorter girl up and placed her on the chair, then she pushed Finn into the other room with her. When she came back to close the door she looked back to face Ein who was still watching her every move, from where she stood she could see that this was no more than a child trapped in a fully grown man's body, eyes filled with so much pain from an unknown past, the once innocent soul had died long ago yet he still reflects so much of what once was.

Venera cleared her throat, and opened her mouth one last time, she hesitated slightly before speaking. "...I do not doubt that these two will come out of this, but please, don't allow your thoughts to drag you down, you have no idea what they truly think of you."

Ein scoffed lightly before responding. "What else could they think of a monster like me?"

Venera frowned lightly before she responded. "Maybe you have done terrible things in your lifetime, but you are no monster." She held eye contact with him, not allowing him to turn away from her. "Don't allow your demons to take control of you, call me if you need anything else." Venera smiled softly at him before closing the door.

Ein was left to his thoughts as he guarded his beautiful pet, he could not help but submit to his sinful thoughts, his demons.

Hello there Ein~ Coming back so soon?