Chereads / Heart_Shaped Coffin / Chapter 10 - 10) Mental disorder

Chapter 10 - 10) Mental disorder

Consciously I died

and went inside my mind

but only if I had known its kind,

of state, would I have tried

to open my eyes earlier

and escape the realms of my head

to return to the  comfort of my bed;

my conscious is much scarier

Anaconda's, Dracula's and Dragons

I saw, bringing chaos, destruction & war

banging against my mental defenses' wall

breaking its patterns of lasers, soldiers n cannons

which were meant to protect me

from negative emotions or morbid thoughts

that kills my esteem and let it decompose, and rot

before drowning in their sullenly sour sea

Trapped in that Cross-fires drama

I realized that I was the only one to blame

for hiding my true colours in shadows of shame

& letting these depressive dragons bypass my mental armor

Guess I should've known better

than to feed and overlook my insecurities

and give in to these ridiculous anxieties

which stems from my haters' letters

Since, "Couldn't fight for myself," is true

or "against myself" in this game of life

I'll now die another Knight without a wife

In this dreamish nightmare I've delved into

Maybe life is just a mind game

and death brings it sequel

another breathing hell, just unruly unequal

Whose depths my mind cannot tame