Nigel Uno, AKA, Numbuh One, Leader of Sector V, was currently lying in a cell on base of Kids Next Door Moonbase. Nigel knew this day would come, he just never knew how stressful it would be. Today marked a turning point in his life. In less than five hours, he would be thirteen years old. He'd be a teenager, he'd be outcast by the organization he had served with the utmost loyalty for his entire childhood, and he would forget everything he had done and everyone he had made friends with. Hoagie. Abby. Wally. Kuki. Rachel. They'd all be wiped clean from his mind.
Until around six months ago he hadn't a care in the world. It only hit him when his longtime friend and crush, Rachel McKenzie, Numbuh 362, had turned thirteen. It was a nightmare for him. He'd never forget that day. Well until now at least.
~6 months ago~
Numbuh 362 stood on a podium in KND Moonbase in front of every operative on base. Numbuh 1 and his team stood on the sidelines listening to her 'going away' speech. Normal procedure is that the stands would be filled with only operatives who had close relations to the decomissionee, but because Numbuh 362 was the supreme leader her speech was being broadcasted to every treehouse worldwide.
"And finally, I'd just like to thank every single operative for making this organization great. As a to-be-decommissioned supreme leader it is my duty to appoint a replacement for me. I interviewed several operatives over the past couple of days and have decided that Numbuh 5 of Sector V will take my place." She announced shooting a smile towards the members of Sector V. "I couldn't think of a better Sector to pick a leader out of than Sector V. With that my service to kids ends and the numbuh 362 is retired once again. KIDS NEXT DOOR RULES!"
"KIDS NEXT DOOR RULES!" The chamber of kids echoed. Rachel stepped of the podium to see Sector V standing next to the door.
"Numbuh 5 thinks you should reconsider. Numbuh 5 couldn't even lead a sector." She told her.
"Stand down Numbuh 5." Numbuh 1 ordered. "These are her last moments in the Kids Next Door, she shouldn't spend them stressing over her decisions."
"Yeah, but she won't remember anyway so..." Numbuh 4 started before getting smacked with a sleeve. "Oi! What'd I do?!" He was met with a slight glare from Numbuh 3.
Rachel gave Numbuh 5 a quick hug. "You'll be great. Just keep a tight lock on your candy supply and don't take crud from anyone." Rachel said moving on to Numbuh 4.
"Well, guess this is it Sir...madam...uhh..." He stuttered unsure of what to address her as.
"It's just Rachel now. If I do anything stupid as a teenager I'm counting on you to pummel some sense into me."
"Yes sir." Wally saluted. Next was Numbuh 3.
"I'll miss you." Numbuh 3 said through tears wrapping Rachel into a hug of her own.
"I know, keep Numbuh 4's head on straight." She told her.
Numbuh 2 extended his hand out and Rachel graciously took it. "Just make sure you don't forget something in your office." He said chuckling.
Numbuh 5, of course retaliated by slapping him with her hat. "Not now Hoagie! Numbuh 5 thinks you should watch yourself now that she's supreme leader!"
Rachel chuckled to herself. "Don't be too hard on him Numbuh 5, and you," She ordered pointing at him. "don't lose your sense of humor." She moved on to the final member of Sector V.
"So, this is it huh, Rachel?" Numbuh 1 asked.
"Looks like it, soldier. Funny, it always felt like it would last forever. Now look at me, thirteen and about to be mind-wiped. Come here Nigel." She said opening her arms.
Numbuh One hugged her tightly and whispered in her ear. "I won't forget you. You've been a great friend."
"Goodbye Nigel. Watch over Sector V. They'll fall apart without you."
"But that's just it. One day they'll have to stand without me. I'm close to turning as well. I don't want to forget you and I don't want you to forget me! We can make a stand. It doesn't have to go this way." Nigel pleaded.
"Don't make this any harder on us, Nigel. No one's a kid forever." Rachel said sadly.
"I hate to cut in, lass, but you technically turned thirteen t minus twenty seconds ago." An Irish voice cut in. They turned to see Numbuh 86 standing with her normal decom task force. She knew it wasn't necessary but it had become standard protocol for five extra guards to accompany her ever since the incident with Numbuh 274.
Rachel leaned in and gave Nigel a quick peck on the lips before pulling back with a slight blush on her face.
"You...you kissed me." Nigel said dumbfounded.
Nigel actually kinda liked it. This was bad. If he enjoyed that kiss in the slightest that could only mean one thing. He was growing up.
"And you're blushing!" Numbuh 2 pointed out. "The only people who blush are..."
"Her teenager blood is beginning to take over!" Wally said cutting off Numbuh 2. "Quick! Decommission her before she uses her B.R.A. to fight back!" Wally yelled panicked before getting smacked by Numbuh 5 and Numbuh 3 simultaneously, knocking him to the floor.
"Shut yo mouth, Numbuh 4, you dolt! Honestly, you're as bad as Numbuh 2!"
Rachel laughed one last time before stepping into the decommissioning chamber. "Goodbye Kids Next Door, goodbye childhood."
The members of Sector V turned away from a blinding light as the familiar voice of Numbuh 362 echoed through the stands in the form of a scream. When the light faded Rachel McKenzie, not Numbuh 362, stepped out of the chamber. She looked out to the stands with a blank stare.
"Where am I?" She was met with silence. She went to cradle her head but felt metal instead. "What the..." She said pulling the helmet of her head. "3..6..2.." She said eyeing the sigil. Everyone leaned forward hoping she retained some form of memory. "The heck does that mean?" She said tossing the helmet to the side. She took a quick look around the room as they all collectively groaned. "Can one of you squirts show me the way out? I don't know how I got here, but I'm supposed to meet my runt brother at the mall in 10 minutes and-" She was interrupted mid-sentence by a blast to the face.
Behind her Numbuh 86 held a smoking gun. "Don't worry none. It's just a knock out gun. Once she's back on Earth shoot her again to reverse its effects." She said tossing the gun to Numbuh 1. Numbuh 86 lowered her head and walked out of the room, sniffling. Numbuh 5's first act as leader was escorting Rachel back to Earth and dropping her off at the McKenzie residence.
~Present~
From that day forward Nigel was much more aware of the clock that was his childhood ticking away. Of course, he always knew this day would come, he just pushed it to the furthest corners of his mind. Once Rachel was gone there was no denying that not only he was growing up, but all of his friends were too.
One by one his friends were being taken from him. Soon after Numbuh 362's ceremony, it was Numbuh 60's turn, then Numbuh 20,000, Numbuh 86, Numbuh 10-Speed, Numbuh 65.3. His cousin Numbuh 10. Numbuh 1-love. Before he knew it, the new supreme leader was thirteen as well.
~4 months ago~
On the same podium where Numbuh 362 had stood in her final moments stood Numbuh 5, or rather Abigail Lincoln, now that she had officially renounced her numbuh.
"Numbuh-" She stuttered "Abby," She corrected herself. "doesn't have much to say." She started. "She'd like to thank each and every one of you for your support throughout the last 6 years, but it looks like her time is up. Abby'll inform you all that I'm naming Numbuh 78 as my replacement and I'd like to extend a special thank you to my best friends Numbuhs 1 through 4. You guys are the best and I'm sorry to leave you." She said sadly. "Kids Next Door Rules!" The room echoed her roar and cheers were heard throughout the assembly. To her left was the decom team and their new leader Numbuh 85 who took over after Fanny's decommissioning, as well as her old sector. She stepped down and approached them. Starting with Numbuh 4 who was trying to make it look like he wasn't crying and failing miserably.
"Keep your chin up kid." She said punching his shoulder lightly. "We'll see each other again." She said smiling at him.
"But you won't remember me." He sniffled. "Fine. You willing to leave us? That's just great." He said crossing his arms. "But you know, if those teens try to recruit you, Sector V'll the first ones there. Watching over you." Wally said letting the tears finally take over. Abby hugged him tightly.
"I know. And even though I might not know it, I'll be grateful you're there." Kuki suddenly grabbed Wally's hand and joined in their hug. "Don't let them push you around girl." Abby told her.
"I won't. Goodbye Numbuh 5. I'll miss you. You were like a sister to me." She said with a few sniffles of her own. She moved on to Numbuh 2 and hugged him
"No more jokes, Numbuh 2?" She asked.
Numbuh 2 looked down somberly "Not this time."
"Yeah, I'm drawing a blank, too." She said with a knowing smile.
"You-you just made a joke. A terrible joke!" Hoagie exclaimed.
"Just for you, baby." Abby said smiling. "Goodbye."
Finally, there was Numbuh 1. "I'm getting really sick of this decommissioning thing." He said. "Why couldn't we be cartoon characters? Never aging, never maturing, cartoon characters?" Nigel asked.
"Because this is life. Not a cartoon. And in life, you have to grow up." Abby said wisely.
"I can't take it!" Nigel yelled. "Rachel, Patton, Lance, and now you. And in four months' time, I'll join you in blissful ignorance of everything I've accomplished."
"Lighten up. The others need you to keep a level head. I'm done but you've got four months' worth of adult tyranny to fight. So enjoy it, that an order from your supreme laeder." She said sternly before sticking her hand out in front of her. "One last time?" Numbuhs 2,3, and 4 circled around them. "5!"
"4!" Wally said sticking his hand on top of hers.
"3!" Kuki yelled mirroring Numbuh 4's movements.
"2!" Hoagie said joining in.
Nigel looked Numbuh 5 straight in the eyes before joining the rest of them. "1! Kids Next Door, battlestations!" With that Numbuh 5 stepped into the decommissioning chamber ending her career with the KND. Nigel watched minutes later. as his friend exited the chamber with her hands on her head.
"Ohh...Abby's got the worst headache." She looked to see four kids staring wistfully at her. "What are you fools looking at?! And where am I?! One of you punks better tell me what's going on before I really lose it!" She said rolling up her sleeve. Just like Rachel, however she was shot from behind and knocked out, this time by Paddy.
"You know the drill, boys. Take her to the Lincoln's." Paddy ordered. He walked over and put a hand on Numbuh 1's shoulder. "Sorry for your loss." Sector V looked down somberly before returning to their ship and beginning the trip back to Virgina.
~Present~
He had by that point lost numerous friends, his crush, and his mentor, to the aging process. Sure, he still had the rest of Sector V, but it was never the same without Numbuh 5. Now that his time was here, he was slightly relieved. He wouldn't have to go through the pain anymore. But then again, he was putting his team through the exact same pain he was getting a pass on. In three months' time, the illustrious Sector V will be nothing but a memory. A memory that he and his sector won't be able to look back on. He decided since he wasn't allowed visitors due to the possible break out opportunities he would just sleep the rest of the time away.
"Hey, teenager! Wake up!" A guard from the decommissioning squad said as he opened my cell door to the corridor of teenagers causing Numbuh 1 to jolt awake. This was where they kept to be teens from around the world in their final hours as kids. It's too bad that it had to be a cell but it was necessary to make sure no one gets away and spills the KND's most vital secrets. Round the clock, expertly trained guards had this spot on lockdown at all times. Some did try to make it out, but the only people he had ever heard of actually succeeding in their quest to escape were Numbuh 11 and Numbuh 274. "Your times here!" The guard said harshly grabbing my arm and pulling me out of the cell. "Get moving teen! Once your speech is over it's the chamber for you." He said pointing his gun at my face.
"I haven't done anything wrong you know. You can put your weapon down. I won't resist." Nigel informed him.
"That's a negative. We both know as soon as I put my gun down you'll pull a Numbuh 274 and betray us!" The operative said. Pointing the gun at Nigel's back he began violently leading Nigel down the corridor. Nigel tripped over his foot much to the annoyance of the guard. He pushed Numbuh 1 forward roughly. "Keep it moving, teenager."
"You're lucky I'm turning thirteen. If I were still a kid and you treated me like this, I'd kick your butt big time." Nigel glared.
"As if!" The operative shot back. "Starting today you're a teenager! And that means you're destined to lose." He shoved Nigel roughly once more. "Now let's go! Numbuh 17 is-"
"Numbuh 52! That boy is still a kid!" They turned to see a much bulkier kid staring bullets into the guard. "That would be Numbuh 1 of Sector V. He's saved your hide more times than you know." The boy said
"Numbuh 1!? As in the son of Numbuh 0!?" The boy asked panicked before chuckling nervously. "Hey, no hard feelings, right? We're friends right, Nigel? Can I call you Nigel? Or would you prefer 'Son of the super cool Numbuh 0'"
"I'd rather you be real with me than suck up to me because my father's a hero." Nigel scowled.
"If you insist on being so rude then I will take it from here, Numbuh 52. Back to your post maggot!" The operative saluted and ran off.
"Sorry about that Numbuh 1, but you know the Kids Next Door is highly prejudiced against teens, that goes double for people who work in this line of the KND business. I'm Numbuh 17. Head of teenage containment cell department." He said offering his hand.
"Numbuh 1. Former leader of Sector V." Nigel said shaking his hand.
"Enough chit-chat. Follow me to the Super Big Assembly Hall of Kids Next Door Moonbase. Your friends are waiting for you."
"Yeah." Numbuh 1 said lowering his head. "My friends."
"Let's move." He repeated.
"Aren't you going to cuff me or something?" Nigel asked.
"I trust you. You are one of the most decorated operatives of the modern Kids Next Door."
"So was Numbuh 274." Nigel pointed out.
"Come on." He said ignoring Numbuh 1. "Your fans are waiting." The walk to the assembly hall was a quiet one. Nigel took in the moonbase one last time, even though he knew after a couple hours he wouldn't remember any of it. He walked into the room to see many operatives in the stands and his Sector to the left. He could clearly make out Numbuh's 83, 84, and 363 in the crowd. He knew 363 was only here because Numbuh 83 made him come. Sitting with them were Numbuhs 44a and 44b along with Numbuh 74.239, Numbuh 35, and Numbuh 23.
He stepped up to the podium like all those before him. "Kids Next Door Rules!"
"KIDS NEXT DOOR RULES!"
"I'd like to start off by thanking each and every one of you for being here. I wouldn't have been half the operative I am without you. Especially my friends at Sector V. Seeing as I'm thirteen in just a couple minutes I like to congratulate Numbuh 2 on his promotion to sector leader." This statement was followed by multiple cheers for Numbuh 2.
"I knew when I came into the Kids Next Door that one day I would have to make the ultimate sacrifice. It's time for me to grow up, no matter how badly I wish it didn't have to happen. I had a blast fighting adult tyranny with you all and was glad to actually make a difference in this messed up world. I vowed to fight for kids everywhere till the end and I can happily say my mission is finished."
"Don't feel bad for me, that just wastes time. You only have so much time to be a kid, spend it being happy. Play with your Rainbow Monkeys, Duel with your Yipper cards, drink root beer until you barf, because one day it'll be you here giving your speech. So I leave you with this, Think of what we've accomplished. Father, Mr. Boss, The Crazy Cat Lady, The Common Cold, Mr. Wink and Mr. Fibb, Grandfather. If they can't stop the Kids Next Door, nothing can. All you have to do is keep fighting. Me being gone doesn't mean anything! Because it's you who make the Kids Next Door great! Kids Next Door, goodbye."
He approached Numbuh 4 and gave him a hug. "Don't worry I'm positive we'll be friends again one day." Nigel said.
"Sure, mate. I just wish you didn't have to go." Wally said through sniffles.
"I know. But you're strong. You can do this. Keep fighting. Never give in. And whatever you do, don't grow up too fast." Next was Kuki.
"Are you sure we'll be friends again? I can't imagine life without you. It was so hard to lose Abby and now this." She said. "I don't want you to leave!"
"I took a vow Kuki, that's just the way it is. Watch over Wally. I know how bad he is with goodbyes." He hugged Kuki for what he thought would be the last time. And met with Numbuh 2.
"This is it, old friend. I wish I could say I'll miss you." Nigel told him. "Hold the team together for me?"
"Of course, Numbuh 1. We'll always be best friends, even if we don't remember it." He said his pilot's hat conforming to the sad look he had on underneath.
"I'll see you on the other side." Nigel took a deep breath. "I'm ready Numbuh 85." Paddy nodded and led him into the chamber shutting the door to the chamber behind him. In front of them were four back to back seats with high tech 2x4 technology duck taped and stapled all over it.
"Take a seat. This'll be over before you know it." Paddy said.
The former Numbuh 1 sat in the closest seat to him and quickly felt metal bonds shackling his arms to the armrests. "Is this really necessary?" Nigel asked incredulously. "You know me, Paddy. I'm no traitor."
"I know. Sorry Numbuh 1, it's standard procedure. Besides decommissioning is extremely stressful and it's likely your reflexes will cause you to try to break free. Also, it's been around a month since those plungers were cleaned so this may stink a little." He informed him.
"Wait, what?"
"Hit it, Numbuh 2-Serious!" Paddy called to his decom squad number two. Said operative flipped a large lever causing a loud whirring sound. Seconds passed and Nigel saw a plunger shoot out and attach itself to his face. 'Here it comes.' Nigel thought.
"Full power Numbuh 88!" Numbuh 85 called to another operative standing above them in a room sealed off by glass. "It's likely his mind will be stronger than most decommissionees!"
Nigel let out a blood curdling scream as he felt memories begin to slip away. It started simple just little things like certain rounds of video games, or the names of operatives he hadn't really cared for, but then he began to feel mission specs leave his mind. Adventures he had begun to slip away, then the worst. His friends. At first it was just their codenumbers he forgot, seconds later he could picture them but didn't remember their given names, then as their appearances began to fade away he felt something weird. Instead of forgetting them completely the memories came flooding back. Hoagie. Wally. Kuki. Abby. Rachel. Patton. Herbie. Lee. Sonya. Fanny. Harvey. Everyone.
Then he could see some of his proudest moments. Choosing his friends over adulthood after the Delightful Children had aged him into an adult. Stopping Chad from sending the moonbase into the sun even with a decommissioned team. Stopping Mandy's takeover with the Delightful Reaper. Finding the book of KND. Recommissioning his father into the fabled hero Numbuh 0. Ramming the moonbase into Grandfather and saving the world. Learning that he's only as good as the team behind him. The final thing he saw was a message, not a memory.
'Welcome.'
The plunger let go of his face and his eyes met those of Numbuh 85 once again. "Your machine's broken." Nigel said. "I remember everything."
"The machine's not broken Nigel." Paddy said. Nigel looked around to see the rest of the squad had left. His shackles retracted back into his chair and Nigel stood up rubbing his wrists.
"I don't understand. Aren't you going to fix it?"
"I already told you there's nothing wrong with the machine, but maybe you'd rather hear it-" He started hitting a small button on his wrist opening a slide door to his right revealing a young African American teen. "from her."
"Well, well, what do we have here?" The girl asked.
"Abby!" Abby, at least appearance wise, had changed quite a bit since her departure. She sported her old shirt but she had grown enough that it fit normally now so she had a new pair of shorts too. Most people didn't know but she actually wore spandex under her shirt back when she was still a KND operative. She kept her red hat and ponytail too. The final difference was she wasn't wearing sneakers but rather sandals.
"Nigel." She said calmly. Then she abruptly ran up and hugged him. "You don't know how rough the past months have been for us!"
He quickly shoved her off of him. "What the heck is going on?! You shouldn't be here! I shouldn't be here! We could get in serious trouble for this. And you-" He said pointing at Paddy "should know better."
"Relax Nigel," Paddy said calmly. "Let me explain."
Nigel eyed him carefully before nodding.
"Ever since the dawn of time, teens and kids have been at war. Like snakes and mongeese always finding something to fight about. We go in their rooms and read their diaries, but then they'd tell on us, they made up nicknames like 'shorty' and 'pipsqueak' so we fought back with our own nasty names like 'pizza-face' and 'railroad-teeth', and of course there's always been the physical side of the war. Kids had a problem though, while we were resourceful, the teens simply had superior muscle power and skill sets. We were getting our butts handed to us over and over. But back when Numbuh 0 was supreme leader he decided it didn't have to be that way."
"That's where we come in." Abby said.
"What do you mean? If the teenagers want to pick on kids, nothing short of their parents will stop them. Besides as far as I know the war between teenagers and kids almost always ended in a standstill or a victory." Nigel said knowledgeably.
"That's because you had help from the other side. After much deliberation Numbuh 0 came to a realization. Who says we can't have teenagers on our side? You see, he found the real reason teenagers pick on kids. Because nobody wants to grow up. They'd rather stay kids, so your father set up a new ultra-top-secret program" Paddy said. "Very few kids know this but the best and most loyal operatives of the KND get the chance to never grow up."
"WHAT!"
"You've been chosen Nigel." Abby said. "You can keep your memories of the Kids Next Door. You can be among those who don't have to grow up!" She said happily.
"This is ridiculous! Teens can't be Kids Next Door operatives! We're not kids anymore!"
"Oh, can't they? It's been this way for years, because people like you, Nigel, are always going to be kids at heart. The highest performing former KND operatives, people like Numbuh 9, and Numbuh 274, have been sabotaging the teens' plans from the sidelines."
Nigel sighed "You may as well tell me more." He said.
"It's called the Teens Next Door. If you agree you'll never be decommissioned. All you have to do is continue to fight for kid kind. Sadly, we can't offer this to a lot of operatives. Too many cooks in the kitchen, you know? We also have to be extremely careful as to only pick people we know are the ones who will always be a kid at heart, even when they're old and grey. If you choose to betray us the remaining TND operatives will hunt you down and decommission you for real." Paddy said.
"What's the catch?" Nigel asked.
"Unlike the Kids Next Door, no one outside a small circle of kids can know you exist. Supreme leaders, the head of decommissioning, and a few alumni are all who get to know. You have to be eleventy billion times more secretive so the teens don't catch on as well. Once you're an adult you'll officially retire from the KND and will need to play oblivious to everything that happened. Get a job, get married, maybe even take a trip to Philadelphia and give way to the next generation of operatives. Think about it Nigel, maybe ten operatives every year get chosen for this. You're the best of the best." Abby told him still giddy from seeing her friend again.
"Of course, if you refuse, then I'll strap you back in and clear your mind for real. We won't force you into anything. What is your choice? Lead a normal life oblivious to our organization, or continue to fight for the KND?" Paddy asked
Nigel thought about it. He'd get to remember. He'd remember everything he had accomplished and more importantly, his friends. Wait a minute...
"You said maybe ten kids a year get chosen?" Nigel asked causing Paddy to nod. "What are the chances the rest of Sector V will join us?"
"Very minuscule." Paddy said honestly. "They'll have to outdo, like a gazillion kids worldwide. Two, Three, and Four are good, yes, but might not be that good."
"I don't know if I could fight for the KND without my team." He said shooting a quick glance at Abby. "My whole team." Nigel said. "You wouldn't happen to have a list of future TND operatives, would you?"
"Of course, but no one's allowed to see it but the head of decommissioning." Paddy said crossing his arms. "And I only get to see for cross-referencing so I don't decommission someone I'm not supposed to."
"If you want me to join, I need to know if my friends are on that list." Nigel said sternly.
Paddy sighed. "Look. It's against the rules for me to tell you who's in and who's out. Maybe someone else can convince you." He hit the button on his wrist once more. "Come on in guys." He ordered.
The door opened again and in walked Maurice, Patton and Rachel. Maurice looked identical to the last time Nigel saw him, Patton was a significantly taller, gotten rid of his hat and army boots in favor of headphones and steel toed boots, and his sleeves were much shorter than before. Rachel had obviously don away with her helmet and sock sandals. Her hair was grown out more and her tiger shirt was replaced by a plain dress.
"Nigel!" Rachel said jumping forward. "I knew you'd make it!" She yelled happily. "Just wait until you see our base. It's gorgeous! It's been so hard these past 6 months without you. Oh, it'll be just like old times. I'm not supreme leader anymore! We can go on missions together and go for ice cream, no more paperwork-"
"Rachel calm down!" Nigel cut in. "I don't even know if I'm-"
"Always the chick magnet huh? It's always the Brits." Maurice asked approaching him. "Put her there, pal." He said offering a handshake.
Nigel obliged shaking his hand. "Look without my team-"
"Oh, shove it maggot." Patton interrupted. "You can't pass this up. I know they're your friends but we can work around it." He offered.
"No. I'm nothing without my team. It may be against the rules, but I was never one for those anyway. I want confirmation Sector V stays together." Nigel order Paddy.
"And if they're not?" Rachel asked. "Are you ready to leave us?" She asked with her best puppy dog eyes.
"I would love to continue to fight evil adults with you guys but without Hoagie, Kuki, and Wally? That's not a life I'm comfortable with. So, Paddy here's going to tell me if my friends are on the list or not."
"Don't push it Nigel." Abby warned.
"I can't Nigel! No one in the entire Kids Next Door but me can know who's on it!" He said waving his arms violently.
"But I'm not part of the Kids Next Door anymore. It sounds more like you won't tell me rather than you can't."
"Fine! Two of your friends made the cut. Happy?" Paddy said finally submitting. "The boss is going to kill me."
"Who didn't make it?!" Nigel demanded. "Tell me now."
"Our scientists determined that while Kuki and Wally have a 99.999999% chance of retaining the aspects that make them perfect operatives, Numbuh 2's stats showed only an 80% chance. A chance we can't take. They've given him numerous tests and he's failed the majority of them." Paddy said. "Personally, I think that he has what it takes and would be more worried about Numbuh 4, but it's not up to me."
"Who's it up to, then?"
"Numbuh Infinity. It's always been his choice. He tests you guys to see who's capable." Paddy told.
"What do you mean 'it's always been Infinity?' That would mean..."
"He's been around for a near thirty plus years? Yeah. He was granted use of the Fountain of Youth by Numbuh 0 as the eternal overseer of possible TND operatives. That's why Infinity framed you, he was testing you. That's also why Chad hated you so much. During the treaty he found that we had given you a much higher score then him. He wanted so badly to be the best that seeing you do better than him made him furious."
"Right. Well you tell Infinity I'll play along for now, but I want my entire team with me after Kuki's thirteenth birthday. If any of those three are missing, I'll recommission and recruit them myself!"
"But you can't do that! Infinity calls the shots! They have to earn their place in the TND!" Paddy exclaimed."You stray from the path set before you and they'll decommission you for sure!"
"I don't care what Infinity thinks, my team has more than earned their spots. My team saved you and Infinity's zombified butts from an eternal life in a tapioca factory. And it was Numbuh 2 who made the birthday suits. The least you could do is let them keep their memories." He said sternly.
"Nigel," Maurice said. "You know it can't work that way."
"Maybe not normally, but this is the fate of my friends we're discussing. An argument I intend on winning."
"I can still decommission you, Nigel!" Paddy shot back.
"No, you can't. You've already said it's not up to you." Nigel said "So you're going to put in a good word for Hoagie and make sure he's accepted, Or else."
"Fine, but I'm only helping you because of your golden record. There is one test we haven't given him, yet. It's called the Whitehouse test. If he passes, I can possibly use that as an argument point." Paddy said. "But as I've already stated, it's Infinity's choice."
"I do have one more question, how do we get out of here without raising suspicion? It's the middle of the day. This place is crawling with teen-hating Kids Next Door operatives."
"Numbuh 78 is going to slip us out. We've got a base in Cancun." Rachel told him.
"Cancun?! It'll take hours to fly there daily! Not to mention the gas."
"Relax Nigel, Numbuh 74.239 built us a functioning teleporter."
"He knows?" Nigel asked.
Rachel nodded in return. "Before we can go you need to go out there and convince everyone you lost your memories. Gotta keep up appearances." She said pointing to the door.
"I can't lie to my team." Nigel argued.
"You have to! In a couple months they'll understand. Now get going, take any longer and they'll expect something." She reasoned. She smiled brightly and shoved him forward and out the pathway. "Abby and I'll meet you back at your house."
Nigel stepped out of the chamber as hundreds of eyes look expectantly at him. "Say, could you give me directions to 2002 Floral Lane? I must've blanked out and took a wrong turn." He asked. He noticed out of the corner of his eye Wally and Kuki were crying and Hoagie wouldn't even look at him. Before he could say anything more he was shot from behind and everything went black.
When Nigel came to he was passed out alone on his front lawn. He groaned as he stumbled to his feet. "My head is killing me." The door to his house flung open to reveal the once revered Monty Uno, known to some as Numbuh 0.
"Nigel, old bean! I say that is hardly the best place to take a nap. And while we have guests, I thought I taught you better. Oh, well you're up now." He continued to ramble as Nigel finished regaining full consciousness.
"You know son, I don't mind if your friends come over to play your Kids Next Hood, but you really should let your mother know first. You know how she gets with her cleaning."
"Friends?"
"Yes, the two lovely young ladies that showed up earlier saying you weren't far behind. Now I shouldn't have to tell you that a gentleman doesn't double-dip, old bean. You've just turned thirteen and you've already got two!"
Nigel's eyes widened. "It's not like that, Dad! Abby is just a friend." Nigel defended.
"Oh? And what of the other? Honestly son, if your little girlfriend is here I'd say it's hardly a time for napping."
"I don't have time for this Dad! I'll be in my room with my friends." He said running past his ignorant father.
Nigel opened the door to his room to find Abby and Rachel rummaging through his stuff.
"Took you long enough chrome dome." Numbuh 5 said. "That zapper must've hit you hard."
"Would you two stay out of my stuff?!"
"I didn't honestly believe Abby when she said you were a closet Rainbow Monkey fan but look at this!" She said holding up a red Rainbow Monkey with black sunglasses.
"Kuki made that for me! I swear!" he said raising his right hand. "I can't just throw it in the furnace, she would never forgive me. She made a replica of everyone in our sector! Back me up, Numbuh 5!"
"He's right. Abby still has hers, we all still have ours." Abby said. "Everyone except Numbuh 4. Still claims he just misplaced it. That still doesn't excuse the underwear, though."
"Get out!" He yelled red with anger. "We're going to the treehouse now." He ushered Rachel and Abby out of his room and slammed the door. 'New treehouse. Gotta pack.' He thought to himself. He loaded up his weapons that he had hidden all throughout his room, as well as spare clothes, the book of KND, and a few other essentials. He zipped up his duffle bag and slung it over his shoulder. He stepped out of his room to find the former Numbuh 5 and Numbuh 362 waiting for him. "So where the teleporter located."
Rachel stuck out her arm and pointed to a watch lighting up with multiple colors on her wrist. "Right here. Gabe said it's the only model of its kind made especially for the TND."
"How does it work?"
"Numbuh 74.239 imported the coordinates of our base in Cancun into the memory card of this watch. Just hit the red button and..."
"Please state destination." The computer droned.
"Take us to home base, computer." Rachel commanded. "This may sting a little."
A bright flash engulfed the three teens and when it faded they were gone. It would've been a bad thing that Numbuh 1's dad saw it all, if he had been a tad more with it.
"I say!" Monty exclaimed "That man really wasn't lying when he said the new I-phone could do anything!
When the light faded Nigel, Abby, and Rachel were standing in front of an old run-down warehouse in Puerto Aventuras. Nigel stared at it blankly. Broken windows, peeling paintjob, ugly gray color, it was a dump!
"This is it? This is our super-secret base of operations?! How are we supposed to get anything done when we're worried the building could collapse on itself at any time?!" Nigel yelled furious.
"Keep your voice down, fool!" Abby scolded. "Looks can be deceiving. You know that from your days in Sector V. Follow us."
Abby and Rachel quickly led Nigel into the old building much to his discomfort. He was sure the walls would give at any moment. When he got inside and took a look around, he was in for a big surprise.
Nothing had changed! Walls and floors that looked like they hadn't been swept and dusted in years, open cardboard boxes everywhere, boarded up walls with fiberglass pouring out in several spots, hardly a proper base.
"Looks can be deceiving huh? This place is a dump! No better than the outside!" He ranted on more as they led him to an old elevator. "You had all of Cancun and you picked this place? I mean, honestly-"
"Shut your mouth before Abby makes you shut it! Get your skinny butt in the elevator!" Abby ordered gesturing to the run-down machine.
"I'm not getting into that death trap! You'll kill us all, Abby!" Nigel shot back.
"Not even for some blurpleberry ice cream?" Rachel asked stepping into the elevator. "The stash is downstairs if you want it."
Nigel sighed. The things he did for love and ice cream. "Fine." He and Abby loaded into the elevator. And Abby grabbed a key from her pocket. She inserted it into a keyhole by the level selector and turned it to reveal a hidden panel. Once she had removed the panel, there was a new button. One that said extra lower level' She pressed the button, and once the elevator was moving she proceeded to relock the panel into place.
"Was all that really necessary?" Nigel asked.
"We can't have any stupid tourists stumbling onto our hideout, now can we?" Rachel asked.
"Technically I'm a stupid tourist who stumbled upon your hideout." Nigel answered.
"Not anymore," Rachel smiled at him. The elevator doors slid open to reveal their real hideout and base of operations. "Now you're one of us!"
Nigel was stunned. It was no treehouse, but it was definitely better than upstairs. Red nylon carpets, a pool table and air hockey to his right. Couches and gamestations to his left. A giant computer and holoprojector in front of him and Patton, Fanny and Maurice waiting for him.
"Welcome to the Teens Next Door Nigel!" Maurice and Patton cheered. He wasn't surprised Fanny wasn't going along with it. She never liked him very much, but it seems she can't get rid of him that easily.
"Wow." Was all Nigel could originally say. "This place is amazing. Who would of thought from the outside."
"Told you." Rachel said hugging him. "I'm so glad you're actually here with us! It's gonna be great!" She said hugging him. "Wait till you see the surrounding area! Ice cream stands, taco stands, pizza joints... say, how about you and I go and get some tacos right now?"
Nigel could see the looks he was getting from Abby and Patton. "Rachel could we maybe do this later...you know...in private?"
"Oh. Right." She said. "Well what are we waiting for let's get this party started!" She yelled rushing to the fridge to grab sodas.
"She really loosened up since she became a TND operative, huh?" Abby asked Nigel. "Abby's never seen her like this."
"No. You just never knew her outside of the KND. This is what she was like before she became Supreme Leader of the Kids Next Door. She was always so outgoing. Kind of like a second Kuki, only smarter, and better looking."
"Just great. Abby's not going to have to hear you and Wally fighting over your precious women, is she?"
Nigel Chuckled. "No. This is a professional space. Wally and I are professionals. I'm sure everything will be handled with the utmost profession."
"Sure." Abby said unsure.
~3 weeks later~
Life as a teen operative was better than Nigel could've ever imagined. He always figured that the day he turned thirteen was the day he'd start hating himself and the world around him. The base may have been much smaller than his old treehouse, but it was still pretty nice.
Nigel and Rachel sat on the couch located on the left side of the Cancun base. Patton and Maurice were currently competing in a video game on their gamestation, and Fanny was out on a grocery run for more ice cream. Abby was out on a mission she had been assigned leaving the base earlier this morning and still hadn't given them any sort of update.
Suddenly they all heard the ding of the base's elevator.
"Abby must be back from her mission!" Rachel exclaimed standing up.
"She'd better have a good explanation for not contacting us this entire time. She's normally so punctual with that kind of thing." Nigel said following.
"No explanation." Abby said as the elevator door swung open. "But I did bring a present." She stepped out of the elevator to reveal Hoagie Gilligan, the former Numbuh 2, standing behind her. He hadn't changed much since Nigel last saw him. He had definitely grown an inch or two and had a white undershirt underneath his sky-blue jacket. He did, however, keep his pilots hat with his trademark '2' on it. Just from looking at him you could tell he was the same pudgy fly boy from before,
"Hoagie!" Patton said dropping his controller and running up to the portly teen. The two fist bumped with each other. "You made it after all!"
"Sure! Why wouldn't I?" Hoagie smiled. "You guys are going to need a pilot and I'm the best in the organization." He boasted. "Now where are the chili dogs?"
"Fanny's out getting food." Patton told him.
Once again the elevator dinged behind them to show Fanny with two bags of groceries around her shoulders. She looked at Hoagie and scowled. "Oh, just what we need! Another stupid boy! Is this why you made me buy chili dogs, Patton?!" She tossed the grocery bags at Hoagie and slid past the two, mumbling about Patton's last favor.
Nigel was still in shock. He wasn't sure his scare tactic had actually worked on Paddy. It already took a pair the size of church bells to go as far as he did and was afraid if he pushed any harder it would just work against Hoagie. He had been so afraid it didn't work he pushed it to the back of his mind and completely forgot it was Hoagie's birthday today. Nigel shook out of his trance when Rachel pushed him towards Hoagie causing him to stumble a bit.
"You're here." Was all Nigel said.
"Nigel!" He said hugging his best friend tightly. "Thank you. Thank you. Thank you."
"What are you thanking me for?"
"Numbuh 85 told me what a pain in the butt you had been about me not originally bein' allowed in the club! But you fought back so hard he believed there had to be something special in me! I wouldn't be here without you!" He ranted.
"Well I'm just glad we get to stay together old friend. By the way, how are Numbuhs 3 and 4?"
Hoagie looked to the floor. "Not so great. You should've seen their faces. It's really taken a toll on them. Numbuh 78 relocated them to the Arctic training base. Numbuh 4 had so much pent up rage that he got assigned as assistant drill sergant. He spends his days taking his anger out on the new recruits and Numbuh 3 works as a medic down there. Numbuh 3's been talking about an early decommissioning too. She wants to go out at the same time as Numbuh 4." Hoagie told them.
"Can they do that?" Nigel asked.
"Operatives can have an early decommissioning if they so please," Rachel said. "but it's usually reserved for operatives who have received severe battlefield trauma. During my reign as Supreme Leader I never had anyone ask to be decommissioned early."
"This could actually work out. If Kuki doesn't wait the extra months to be decommisioned, then we'll all be reunited earlier!" Nigel said lighting up. "She won't have to go through an extra month of pain!"
"And what if yer friends don't make the cut?" Fanny asked from the holoprojector.
"I know they will." Nigel said confidently. "Numbuh 85 already had their names on the list of future TND operatives."
"And if yer wrong? The list is subject to change after all." Numbuh 86 informed him. "Especially if Numbuh 4 is taking his anger out on the younger operatives."
"Numbuh 85 should know better than to try to keep us apart. But I suppose I could always have Hoagie here rebuild the recommissioning module."
"You'd go against me little brother?" Fanny asked.
"And the head of decommissioning?" Patton added.
"Not to mention the Kids Next Door in general!" Hoagie exclaimed.
"Yes. Yes. And yes." Nigel responded. "Three out of five isn't good enough. Neither is four out of five. I won't stop until we're all together again."
~1 month later~
Today was the day. Numbuh 4's 13th birthday. If Numbuh 3 really did plan on decommissioning herself at the same time as Wally, then it was the moment of truth as well. If Kuki and Wally weren't TND operatives, then Nigel would have to turn on the organization he had fought loyally for and fight to restore their memories. Most people would think Nigel too blindly loyal for this type of action. But there was something Nigel had learned over the past year or so. His loyalty to the Kids Next Door was to be commended, yes. But at the same time there was one thing that outweighed even his loyalty to the KND. His loyalty to his friends. He knew he had the support of Abby and Hoagie, but he would never ask that of them.
Rachel, Fanny, and Patton were currently spying undercover at Stacey's teen party, those poor souls, And Maurice was with Cree, leaving Abby, Hoagie, and himself alone at the base. Things with the TND had been a lot calmer than he had thought it would be. They had been on plenty of missions in the past 6 weeks but instead of going in guns a blazing like he was used to, he had to act like he liked these shallow, annoying, teens just to get the info out of them, then report it back to Numbuh 78, then all that was left was last minute touch up sabotage and it was on to the next assignment. So anticlimactic.
"Oi! What's a guy gotta do to get a 'Welcome to the TND, Numbuh 4, we missed you.' around here." A familiar voice shouted. "I'm cool enough to get into your cruddy club and no one's there to greet me!" Nigel looked to see Numbuh 4 standing just outside of the elevator door.
"Numbuh 4!" Nigel and Hoagie shouted running up to him. They must've been so lost in thought they didn't notice him. In their defense you might not have even guessed it was him based on his height. He was now just as tall as the rest of them. Same bowl cut and a sleeveless orange hoodie.
"Who were you expecting? Numbuh 13? I mean you should have been upstairs to welcome me at the entrance I set up fireworks and confetti, and everything. And Kuki was the only one who gets to see it! Not a great start for the so called 'legendary' Teens Next Door." He continued
The growth spurt was too obvious for Hoagie not to make a joke out of it. "We were afraid you may have grown out of fighting adult tyranny!" He yelled slapping his knee.
"Kuki's here too?! Thank 0! I was afraid I'd actually have to go rogue!" Nigel sighed. The door to the elevator opened yet again this time reveling a girl with long black hair and probably the thinnest legs in the world. Her sleeves, for a change, didn't hang over her hands, but her dress kept the same green color scheme they had all come to know from her.
"Oi! Of course she's here!" Wally said gesturing like he was presenting her.
"Hi Nigel! Nice place you got here. You really pulled the wool over our eyes. Why didn't you just tell us? We wouldn't have told anyone!" She said slight irritation in her voice but as usual she was to cheery to be angry.
"I really wanted to Kuki, but Rachel and Abby forbade me from it. Now come here." He said. "This wouldn't be a proper reunion without a group hug. He hugged Kuki and Wally tightly and seconds later Abby and Hoagie joined in too. "I'm so happy." Nigel said. "We get to stay together."
"Together forever." Hoagie said.
"Forever friends." Kuki added.
"And in the end, we'll all remember the good times." Abby finished.
"Enough with the mushy stuff, I got a better idea! Abby?" He said eyeing her "How about it?"
She nodded putting her hand in front of her. "5!"
"4!" Wally yelled slamming his hand on top.
"3!" Kuki said slipping her hand in too.
"2!" Hoagie said joining them.
"1!" Nigel said placing his hand on the very top.
"Teens Next Door!" They said all together.
"Hoagie pour us some root beer!" Nigel ordered. Hoagie nodded and grabbed five mugs. "I propose a toast!" Hoagie passed everyone a mug filled with root beer. "Long live Sector V!"
"Long live Sector V!" They echoed.
"Good to see you guys are happy with your new arrangements." A voice said. The five turned to see Rachel standing at the doorway.
"I thought you were at that party." Hoagie said.
"I was. But Numbuh 78 called with a new mission. Patton and Fanny can handle the party themselves. Are you ready for your first assignment together once again?"
"Let's do it!" Kuki cheered.
"Just like old times." Wally smiled.
"What's the mission? Whatever it is, consider it done." Nigel said.
"Your first mission as a team," Rachel started. "is for the five of you to find a cure for the delightfulization process and use that cure to recommission Sector Z