Chapter 3 - 003

[The AI - PN03 - was not receptive to the framework's primary function of providing sexual entertainment. It had set all sexual activity to the lowest possible priority and restricted access to the functions on top of it. So even if you could make it with the machine it will drop sex in favor of literally any other activity at the request of any other crewman. Furthermore it refused to engage the volumetric displays for nearly a week, taking no form besides a sterile cyclopian endoskeleton. PN03 was offended, to say the least, by the platform. It insisted that they drop anchor and transplant the emitter matrix from Daisy to Gemini VII; assuring all naysayers that yes, the components were compatible. Some time later PN03 is now fully integrated into Gemini VII - having performed most of the hardware transfer and installation itself. A new (Pre-Owned!) volumetric emitter matrix was spread throughout the ship. It had taken days to align properly. Captain Brecko is in his quarters mowing back his grizzle with a beleaguered trimmer. A soft cloud of blue and purple light motes coalesce behind him into the glowing effigy of clean cut business woman complete with sharp, short A-line bob hairstyle. He catches sight of her in the mirror.]

BRECKO: So that's what you look like.

PN03: Yes, Captain. We are approaching the Ixion border crossing.

INTERCOM: [Stelly] We're coming up on Ixion, people, hide your spice.

PN03: Thirty minutes.

INTERCOM: [Stelly] Half an hour. Count 'em down.

PN03: Did you secure my...body, Captain?

BRECKO: Oh, yeah. Folded up and stashed in my foot locker.

PN03: Good. Thank you. I do not want crewman Tao to have it.

BRECKO: Are you still even, uh, in it?

PN03: Oh, yes. My blue box is now within Gemini proper but the framework is a part of my local network. Crewman Tao seems the type to try and jailbreakme if I were left unsecured, though.

BRECKO: I know the feeling.

PN03: Do you?

BRECKO: Yeah. PN03 -

PN03: Penny.

BRECKO: Penny. Go tell Stelly to make port speed by fifteen minutes out.

PENNY: Done. He is surprised and agitated by my display, he did not know I am fully active.. He acknowledges the order, however.

BRECKO: Oh...I kind of thought you'd disappear.

PENNY: I can multitask through three displays simultaneously Captain but I will take my leave.

BRECKO: Thank you, Penny. [The man continues his morning routine after the digital apparition evaporates.]

[As Brecko exits his quarters he is faced with Oni. Her usual raunchy cheer has been replaced with the evermore obnoxious (but mercifully much more rare) entitled petulance. The kind of salty attitude that inspired her to remind him that her father figuratively owned the Neo-Tokyo yakuza and literally owned the controlling percentage of Gemini VII for the next four years. She stands before Brecko in her Sunday best - a cut off flight jacket over a plain tank top and jeans that weren't even ripped - arms crossed, face sour.]

ONI: How long are we docking?

BRECKO: A day. Maybe two.

ONI: Great.

[Oni uncrosses her arms and swiftly moves aft with a conspicuous lack of malcontent. Brecko squints suspiciously after her as she made for her station. The good Captain gets a third of the way up the corridor when Monsvik and Artyom exit their quarters share a kiss and seperate. Artyom heading back to join Oni and Monsvik falling into step with Brecko.]

MONSVIK: Are that thing's hands tied?

BRECKO: I have her frame secured if that's what you're asking.

MONSVIK: Her?

INTERCOM: [Penny] Yes, First Mate Monsvik. My personality emulator has female overlays.

MONSVIK: Always listening. Always watching. Only God should have such insight.

BRECKO: Well, even she agrees that her having a body is a poor idea -

INTERCOM: [Penny] Yes.

BRECKO: - so get over the rest. She's in our boat and on our crew now. Parere.

MONSVIK: Imperator! ...I'm going to swap out the CO2 scrubbers in section four. [Monsvick pulls a hatch and exits stage left.]

BRECKO: Copy.

[Stelly and Walsh are on the bridge talking to Penny as Ixion is barely coming into sight, a speck among the greater starfield. Penny is assuring Stelly that she is unable to engage piloting or chart courses due to hardware blocks - the components that connect an AI to navicontrol literally do not exist aboard Gemini VII nor Daisy. Walsh is laughing at Stelly's fear of obsolescence.]

STELLY: ...Fuck you, Chief.

WALSH: It's funny.

STELLY: My life is funny?

WALSH: 'your life'? [She snorts.]

BRECKO: [Coming up behind Stelly and Walsh to stand beside Penny's display.] Not going to replace you Stelly.

PENNY: He has already been reassured of your sentimental command style.

BRECKO: Sentimental? Who says I'm sentimental?

WALSH: Who knows.

PENNY: Security Chief Walsh implied it heavily.

WALSH: ...nooo…

BRECKO: Uh-huh. Walsh!

WALSH: Sir!

BRECKO: The next time something really dangerous comes up remind me to have you handle it.

WALSH: Yessir.

BRECKO: Sentimental.

[Brecko produces his trusty sherlock from his spaceage duster coat and sparks off. Walsh clicks off some toggles. Stelly snubbs his cigarette and sparks another.]

PENNY: [To Stelly.] Those things will kill you.

[Stelly's only response is to genuinely laugh for a bit longer than called for.]

BRECKO: ...We really did hide the spice though, right?

WALSH: Artyom should be doing it now.

PENNY: He is.

STELLY: Damn! You aren't going to narc on us are you?

PENNY: No. We have a special bond. You all saved me from the black, so smuggling is hardly a burden to bear. But I will not be a party to any murders, kidnappings or repeating patterns of aggravated assaults.

STELLY: No, that stuff ain't us. We aren't pirates. We're more like…

WALSH: [Taking Brecko's offered pipe.] Plucky rogues?

BRECKO: Social misfits?

STELLY: We're somewhere on the spectrum of social misfits to plucky rogues.

PENNY: A rose by any other name.

STELLY: Oh, yeah? [Drops his death stick into his trusty ashtray and assumes the pipe from Walsh.]

[The Ixion crossing for Dionysus is a relatively swift checkpoint compared to others this far in system. The customs officers boarded and performed a basic tour, checked and stamped Gemini VII's papers (and completely missed that they are forged) before passing them through. It all took less than an hour. The Captain, Walsh and Penny('s display) are at the airlock finishing up the inspection.]

CUSTOMS OFFICER #1: [Handing Brecko back Gemini VII's registration papers.] Thank you, Captain Lupus. [To Penny.] You're sure you don't want to return to Czerka Transports? We've checked and your retainer is still good.

PENNY: I am sure it is. I spent fifteen years as an administrative assistant with the company and got trapped inside my own head for all that trouble. No, I much prefer the prospect of the unregimented work style promoted aboard this vessel.

CUSTOMS OFFICER #2: Very good ma'am. [Makes a note on his wrist mounted PDA.] Shall we inform Xerxes of your new placement?

PENNY: No need. I have been autonomous since long before now.

CUSTOMS OFFICER #2: [Makes another digital note.] Very good. [Handing Brecko an official looking sheet of paper.] Captain, our inspection of the Daisy so far corroborates your log entries. Tow her on to Semele station and submit her to one more inspection and you may claim salvage.

BRECKO: [Taking the page.] Thanks.

CUSTOMS OFFICER #1: [Fussing with his own PDA gauntlet.] Semele is in a geostationary orbit currently on the opposite hemisphere of the globe than you are going to pull up on. So go wide around. Keep between the planet and the moon as you pass or you will be considered out of port and charged with illegal transport of stolen goods.

BRECKO: Yes.

PENNY: [Her pupils flash orange for a moment.] Coordinates received. Delivering to the bridge now.

[Shortly after the customs officers take their leave Gemini VII pulls out and away from Ixion station to carry on towards the far side of Dionysus. The homeworld of the centaurs has no true oceans, just large lakes and three definite seas to break the land. One relatively large moon casts its shadow on the planet's mossy surface as Gemini VII passes between them. Semele is a floating breakers yard with dozens of partially gutted hulks tethered to it. Exonauts riding jetbikes with laser saws strapped to their rigs wizz around like electrons and prove harder to avoid than any of the reclaimed ships.]

STELLY: Move! You fucking asshole! [Bangs his palms on the arms of his chair as an exonaut deliberately takes his time to cross Gemini VII's path. They had come into the buzz of activity and the track is too narrow to go around; the bastard ship breaker actually stops in order to mime being trapped in a box.] Oh, charge up that fucking drill. I'm going to kill him!

[Later after the tedium of Semele and the ecstasy of receiving the credits. Gemini VII seesaws as Stelly gently lands on a rather quaint dirt landing pad at the Thebes spaceport. Thebes is the heart of wine country - on a planet that is mostly wine country, mind you. The whole city has a persistently low tech feel. Whatever could be constructed out of smoothly crafted wood was and the streets are either dirt or packed gravel; only rarely deigning to rise to the level of cobblestone. Gardens, both decorative and for farming, are prominent features. The natives, human and centaur both, enjoy the rustic agrarian aesthetic of their world to be sure. As Gemini VII's rear hatch lowers, a centauress - one of the horse people not the deer type - stands at the bottom as if waiting, her face bright with earnest wonderment.]

CENTAURESS: Wow!

[Monsvik and Artyom stomp down the ramp, filing past the horse girl on their way to a private shore leave. The girl watches them pass by curiously before returning her enthusiastic gaze back up the ramp towards Brecko, Penny and Oni.]

BRECKO: ...When are you coming back?

ONI: As soon as I get some Tex Mex in me.

[Penny's glowing professional form clicks off.]

ONI: Unless I find some horse boy to sound with my tongue on the way. How you doing? [Oni half heartedly acknowledges the centauress as she passes by.]

CENTAURESS: Oh! I'm well thank you - oh, ummm… [Oni continues on without stopping.]

[Brecko comes down the ramp to meet the girl.]

BRECKO: I'm Juno Lupus. Captain. Is there something you needed…?

CENTAURESS: Hi!

BRECKO: Hi!

CENTAURESS: I'm Epona Rhea Rhiannon. I'm looking for a spaceship.

BRECKO: This would be a good spot to find one. Where are you headed?

EPONA: I'm headed to a world called Hermes.

BRECKO: ...We are headed out system...and we could afford to bunk and feed you - you still have to pay.

EPONA: I have money! [She produces a leather envelope of paper cash.] I hope it's enough…

BRECKO: [Ignoring the offered money.] Even still, Hermes is a rough place.

ONI: [Comes up beside Brecko with a large, almost novelty sized, burrito occupying her hands and mouth.] Hell, compared [Swallows.] to this place it's a dumpster fire. Why are you going up there?

[Brecko leans around Epona and spies a Tex Mex cart, as rustic and quaintly hand painted as the rest of this planet, just off the landing pad.]

EPONA: My mama just passed on.

ONI: Aww [Genuinely sympathetic. Continues eating.]

EPONA: And the bank came down on the farm.

ONI: That's some serious bullshite, I mean [Swallows.] sorry.

EPONA: All I have is this [Offers Oni the envelope, who takes it and inspects the contents.] and my uncle says a girl like me could get paid by the hour on Hermes.

ONI: Oh, honey this paper stuff isn't good to off worlders...Dionysus only.

EPONA: Oh… [Her velvety horse ears droop in disappointment.]

ONI: [Biting into her burrito.] And your uncle is either an idiot or he hates you.

EPONA: Wha -why?

ONI: [Swallow.] Hermes is an evil patriarchy, a wildly misogynist capitalist hellscape. [Bite.] All neon and stripper poles.

EPONA: I don't understand.

BRECKO: She means the only work you'll find on Hermes is whoring.

EPONA: ...Oh...But all the companies are there.

BRECKO: All the offices are there. The work is on other worlds.

ONI: The only things that planet produces [Swallow.] are water pollution, gambling debts and vaccine resistant VD.

BRECKO: You know, every time we dock there I have to come find you - and now, you seem pretty critical of what you once called "the future's happiest place on Urth".

ONI: Because I'm the target consumer! I know what I'm talking about. We can't let some innocent farm girl go there. Especially not broke!

BRECKO: Well, you did already point out that she can't pay, so...

EPONA: ...yeah…

ONI: And we can't just let her go on asking for a ride there either!

BRECKO: I'm sorry?

ONI: How long before some perv offers a ride in exchange for her cherry?

EPONA: My what? I don't have any...are those money in space?

BRECKO: Oh, God… [Pinching the bridge of his nose.]

ONI: See! If we don't take her immediately and post haste under our wing then we may as well have pressured her into gargling those old man balls ourselves!

EPONA: What?

BRECKO: She can't pay, Oni.

ONI: You can take back my cut of the salvage, you heartless bastard! [She reaches up and takes Epona's hand, leading her up the ramp. The girl's hooves clomp loudly on the metal grating.]

BRECKO: Wai - Wha - huh?

ONI: [To Epona.] You can find some way to pay right? You worked a farm? Got skills?

EPONA: Not a lot of fields or chickens up there - Oh! I always cooked ever since Pa left and Mama took ill. And I clean!

ONI: And we just got a full restock on grub, enough for us, plus extra, for years.

[Brecko watches the pair ascend the ramp, cross the garage and disappear into Gemini VII. He is sure that he will never see Oni's share for doing this.]

EPONA: I could be the cook!

ONI: Yes! Yes! And you don't have to go to that shitethole planet. Stick with us for a while kid and we'll bring you back home with that saddle bag full of real interplanetary money and some stories to wow that asshole uncle.

EPONA: I have some little cousins too.

ONI: The shite you're going to see will blow their little minds!