January 5, 2015 

Today is my birthday. Today is also my wedding anniversary.  Exactly one year ago, I got married to a man who hates me. It's an extra special day, supposedly. If only I was married to a man who loves me. My husband hates me though we've been living under one roof for a year now I doubt I could count with my two hands the times when he had talked to me. 

I woke up alone.  Giannia usually wakes up very early. I think he does his best to do so and I think I know why.

"Joy, today is a happy day. So smile and carry on" I said to myself encouragingly.

It's 6:00 am. I've got to hurry if I don't want to be late for work. I took a shower and put on some jeans and a loose t-shirt. I ran to the kitchen and prepared breakfast for Gianni. I don't know if Gianni eats what I prepare for him but I wan't to be able to show him that I cared either way.  

6:50 am Gianni usually goes to work at 7 am. I waited for him for a few more minutes before I finally heard the door from his room open then close. Then he I saw Gianni walk out of the door. He's looking as handsome and dashing as the last time I saw him. Gianni seriously looks like one of those Calvin Klein models you see on billboards and magazine. Tall, handsome face with the boyish-smile and a body like again those Calvin Klein models. 

"Hi Gianni!" I ran up to him and attempted to give him the sandwich that I made. "I made Turkey sandwich today---

"When will you ever get tired of this? " He said while taking the sandwich from my hands he then walked to his car and drove off to work.

He didn't even bother to look at me. 

It's been like this since day one. Gianni hates the fact that he's married to me and I've dealt with his bitterness since the day we got married.

Gianni's grandfather-- Ricardo raised me since my parents died. I was only 12 years old then. My grandfather saved Ricardo's life when they were younger.  The two became very good friends and agreed tomake their children marry each other but this didn't happen.

When I was 12 years old my family's home was engulfed wiith fire. I was the only one who survived from the fire. Each of my family member vanished. I didn't have any other relatives who wanted to take care of me. When Ricardo heard this he took me under his wings and took care of me. 

Ricardo always made it clear to me and Gianni that we were to be married one day. Since then Gianni hated me even more. He already was very obvious that he didn't like me it gor worst when Ricardo told us one night while having dinner that we were going to get married one day.

I did like it a little having Gianni around growing up. He was like a big brother who occasionally bullied me. And there were times when I also felt like he cared. He was much older than me so just a year after I arrived he attended Uni in America while I stayed with Ricardo. The only time we could see eachother were on holidays.

I knew Gianni had girlfriends while he was at Uni. Each time we visited him at Uni he would make sure that we see his girlfriends. He was not shy kissing them in front of Ricardo. Which of course infuriated the old man.

Ricardo was diagnosed with cancer when I was 20 when he learned that he had only a few months to live he decided that me and Gianni should be married before he passes. I thought Gianni would never agree to marry me  but he surprisingly did. Just days after we got married Ricardo passed.

I was devastated but I didn't have the chance to mourn. Gianni had to go back to Italy and he took me with him or I went with him. Because he married me I really thought he was open to the idea of making our marriage work because again though it was arranged and he didn't really love me. I was willing to make things work and also I've watched a lot of videos of couples who were in an arranged marriage and they learned to love each other. So I'm hoping we'd also be like them.

The night we arrived in Italy. Gianni handed me a folder and a tablet.

"What's this?" I asked Gianni with a smile on my face.

"I want you to sign the papers and the tablet I want you to drink it."

"I  need time to read the paper and may I know what the tablet is for?"

"Everything you need to know is in that folder. Including that tablet. " 

I was too tired from the flight so I had to get some sleep before I read the documents in the folder. A good call because the things I read on those documents made my head spin and my heart ache.

That was more than a year ago. I feel my cheeks turn red at the memory. 

Gianni firmly set the terms between us.Gianni only agreed to marry me because Ricardo threatened that he would not get any of his inheritance if he didn't marry me and it was a critical time for his business so he was forced to go through with it. 

Apparently, according to Ricardo's will we're not allowed to file for divorce before our third year of marriage. If we do: neither of us will get anything.

My parents left some money for me though not as grand as what Ricardo has left for me it was still enough for me to survive. So marrying Gianni was my way of thanking Ricardo. And I also had this huge crush on Gianni since forever so... Being married to my first love is actually not that bad-- or so I thought and also Ricardo loved me so much when he was still alive and I knew he only wanted the best for me. And in his thoughts nothing could be better than his granddson -- or so he thought too. He didn't know how crafty his grandson could be. We both didn't.