I just got out of a boring conversation with the mayor of New York. The annoying plebeian was trying to get my support for the next elections, at which point I just dismissed him. Democracy, where you have to lick people's asses to get into a position of power.
Grabbing a glass of wine, I casually stroll through Stark's tower, making small talk with unimportant people because being rich and famous causes a lot of people to want to (figuratively) get in your pants. 'The perils of fame' I thought before arriving in front of the figure of Bruce Banner.
"Mr Banner," I greet the unassuming man, who could turn into a green beast who could match my son in strength. "I have to say, that was quite the impressive showing displayed at Las Vegas."
He nervously chuckled at the reminder of all the destruction his fight with the leviathans caused. "Well, I tried my best."
"Don't feel so glum. Without you, many more would have died. Introductions are probably needed, Loki is my name and if you would believe the tales of Stark, also a Norse god."
"Thanks and... I know who you are." He says,
"Oh. What do you know about me?" I asked.
"You entered university at the age of 13 and currently have at least 10 PhDs. Which is frankly absurd." He says with something close to shock. I didn't want to give him a heart attack by telling him that I had mastered thousands of fields in my long life.
"Don't you have seven? So I don't see the problem with me having three more, plus my completionist tendencies from video games acting up, so now I am just having fun collecting them," I said. " Academics don't take me seriously though because not dedicating my entire life to one field, makes them feel as if they were personally affronted."
"I had seven by the time I was 35 and you're barely in your late twenties. Yeah, I can understand the last part. People mocked me when I went for my second PhD."
"What can I say, I like speedrunning. Enough about me, I was surprised to find you at the battle of Las Vegas. Last I heard you were running from the military, in Brazil I believe."
"Well… That is a long story. Unfortunately, I don't believe I am not privy to share that information." By this time Shield isn't exposed to the general public, so I can understand why he wouldn't share that information.
From what I know, Rising Tide, a hacking activist group, exposed Shield to the general public a while after the New York battle in the original verse and not the messed-up universe I influenced.
"Such a shame. I am sure it would have made for an excellent tale." I said and before I could continue our frankly awkward conversation we were interrupted by someone else. Before I could curse the person with an itch that just won't be satisfied, the person's identity was revealed to be Natasha Romanoff.
She wasn't that great, sure she was cool from the viewpoint of someone who watched the movie but being an old powerful magic user, squashes any fanboying you would have. Now the only thing she had of interest to me was the fact that I could use her to get insider info on Shield and that she was hot.
"Hello, there gentlemen. I hope you are enjoying the evening." She said with a smile. This action of hers, caused Bruce to become an almost blushing mess next to me. She was dressed in an eloquent black dress that certainly didn't hide her cleavage. So I couldn't completely blame Bruce. "I am surprised to find you two enjoying each other's company."
"Bruce here is a man of science and I would like to think I am something of a scientist myself."
"Yet you spend all your time making video games for children." Another person interrupted us. It was Tony, which wasn't surprising.
"Better than playing dress-up, no offence to the rest of you." I retorted. "Three Avengers paying attention to me, wow, I might feel special."
"Damn, now I know why you aren't at more parties." He said. What the hell is this guy's problem? Did I accidentally sleep with his mother or girlfriend?
I quickly peek into his mind and find out he didn't like the fact that he couldn't get into my system which was something I knew but when I searched deeper into his mind I found out that Jarvis was somewhat corrupted and he had to spend an entire day fixing the problem, it certainly didn't help that I was a dick to him.
"I can see why people who are worth a damn aren't here if this is your hosting skills. I honestly envy the people that don't know you." I replied. I knew he was an asshole but he is almost approaching my level and I don't even identify as a superhero. Says a lot about society.
"Okay let's calm down and act a little more civilized." Natasha tried to pacify us.
"Not worth it, funny. Where were you when the world was attacked? Hiding away in your little hole, you call home while we fought to defend our fellow man. If you even are a man."
I refrain from chuckling at his ignorance. I take another peek into his mind and find out he is being influenced by a familiar energy signature. The influence was making him scared and his coping mechanism right now was to become aggressive. I didn't remove the influence since I had a feeling something interesting would happen right now. It tried to worm into my mind too but I could easily ignore it.
I was right when I suddenly heard an explosion coming from the side of the building, the explosions somehow not killing anyone. Super hearing and explosions are really not good for your ears but I am glad I had designed a spell that would passively reduce the volume of things that are too loud.
The Avengers were already on the move, some trying to evacuate the people in the building, others trying to figure out what the hell was happening. The source of the explosion came floating through the opening that it made. Along with it, another figure approached, moving at blinding speeds.
Wanda and Pietro, my two short time proteges. To think that people think I am a shit teacher, In the original, the twins could fight a well-coordinated Avengers, now with my training, I am afraid the Avengers would have a most difficult time, especially since they lack Thor, one of their best and Magni wasn't here either.
Red energy constructs menacingly encircle the Avengers and I had to stop myself summoning a bucket of popcorn to watch this entertaining piece.
"Give us Stark and we would allow you leave," Wanda stated in her enticing accent. Girls threatening people would be a red flag for most people, but I think the sexiest person in the world is Hela. So you can see my tastes aren't vanilla.
"And if we don't?" Captain America, who just came out of nowhere, asked.
"Don't expect us to play nice," Wanda replied in a cold tone. She briefly looks over the guests and spots me, a flicker of surprise appears on her face.
'Don't worry about me, love. Enjoy yourself.' I transfer the message to her mind so that she wouldn't back out just because she would feel like she was betraying me if she continued with her plans.
"That leaves us no choice. Avengers Assemble!" Steve stated. Ah, the familiar line, takes me to a lifetime ago.
A/N: More chapters on pa.treon/DickMcJones