eleutheromania (noun)
An intense desire for freedom.
Chapter 15
(Mako.P.O.V)
I tip toe on the changing rough surface of the concrete ground, everything digging at my dirty feet. The gate man studies me from under his mask and I press a smile. We walk into the old designed building, made of brick stones; layered in grass and broken parts.
We head to rusty metal stairs, the walls covered in green mold. A skinny man in a worn out leather jacket; black strips leaning away from the fabric ready to fall; stops us in place before we head up. He glances at their foreheads and then at mine; covered in frizzy bangs.
"Where's your number?" He asks voice threatening; his chest lifting forward.
"uh... I... We had a little incident and it fell in the water... it flowed away." I shrug shaking my head acting disdained. He keeps studying me.
"Age?" He asks peering; nose flaring...
"Oh come on man, you see me everyday. I'm not gonna bring a shlock-headed fshek in." Arin motions his hand at me. I nod, I'm one of the normal ones... supposedly.
"Get off our case man." Arin prods rolling his eyes in annoyance. The masked man nods and moves on; giving me a silent glare. Ana winks at me, pulling her mask down; sticking her tongue out playfully and putting it back on immediately. Feeling a weight on my chest, I try to shut away thoughts of my family out.
After heading up the rusty metal stairs, we saunter inside a long dark hallway; no lights to be seen. Just natural lighting coming in from the cracked holes in the building. We pass a few rooms, loud lively noises of people coming from it. Ana walks inside one of the rooms and Arin tells me to follow.
A few thin beddings on the ground, and a broken table in the far right corner of the room. A window with no glass shows a beautiful scenery of the outside. I run to it and stick my head out, green mountains surround us with slight fog. I can't hear any birds in the distance, leaving it very quiet.
"It's so pretty here!" I beam as Arin joins me. He pulls his mask down slightly taking a deep breath. His eyes sunken under his bangs.
"I'll let you stay here for now." He offers me. I smile gladly. No one seems to threaten my life here so it's a good place to stay for now.
"But you have to take me out of here with you." He orders, voice coarse as his eyes wonder at the trees. I press my hands at the rim of the window.
"Yeah sure." I say for now. If I was a ghoul, I wouldn't leave this beautiful place. At least they're free here. And they're strong and able to fight for their lives, so there's nothing to fear...
"In five days." He whispers. I glance up at him in confusion,
"What?" I ask. He leans forward,
"We have to leave in five days... that's when it's my turn." He hisses chin dipping down. I glance at his eyes, fear washing over him. He shuts his eyes swallowing. He's turn...?
"Are you the youngest? after Ana?" I ask him looking up at the mountains.
"Yeah..." He lets out voice shaky. I nod pressing a smile.
"Stand firm!" We both jump at the loud order. Arin quickly places his mask on and twirls around stiffly. I pull myself out the window glancing at the new situation. A women in a black bulky mask stands at the door, with two men beside her standing like guards. She gawks at me as Ana comes forward next to us. The women has braided hair, firm in place with her headband stating the number 96.
"A newbie." She utters giving me a once over.
"State your number." She orders. uhhh what number should I pick? what if the number I say someone already has it? what are these numbers for anyway?
"State your age." She orders now. I watch as Arin opens his lips to answer but I blur it out first,
"Twenty four." I lie. Arin glances at me, eyes wide darting.
"You don't look like it." The women presses studying my face.
"She just looks young." Ana supports placing a hand on her hip confidently. Arin's hands clench,
"Okay." The women says nodding. The man next to her scribbles on a thin black device, giving me a last glance they leave the room in peace. I let out a sigh; my temple throbbing as Arin strides to one of the beddings and throws himself on it flat, the thin bedding so slim not bouncing in the slightest in return.
"Can you swim?" I ask him. He slowly twists his head my way as I take a seat next to him.
"Please don't tell me the way out is swimming across the ocean." He groans weakly. I look down at his masked face.
"It has to be. It's either the sky or the ocean. And neither one of us has wings." I state shrugging; imitating birds with my arms.
"The ocean beyond the shore is dangerous. Not only the waves, them gristly snakes will get us." He informs me. I gawk at him,
"Snakes? what snakes?" I ask, fully knowing normal snakes won't survive in the ocean.
"You know, those electric snakes... they're long and painful." He elaborates, showing their length with his hands. A giggle escapes my lips and I nod in amusement. Eels...
"hmm... what about the boat?" I ask. He shakes his head.
"As soon as you get near the shore of the other side, snippers will get ya. A machine detects any ghoul above the water and shoots them." I nod pressing my lips at the information. The way is defiantly the ocean. And if there's something that detects the ghouls, then there must be a way to hide from them.
"What's that in you ear." Arin asks rolling around on his back. I slightly touch my earing.
"An earing, had it since I remember. It's a family thing." I elaborate tugging at it.
"Is it something that families outside do?" He asks me pulling down his mask.
"I don't think so... I don't know if others do it too." I rail not sure of my answer.
"How is it out there? are people really very nice?" He asks excitement in his voice. I shrug, I haven't dealt with many people outside myself...
"Are you a hugal? ones that don't... you know." I say glancing at Ana who's looking like she fell asleep.
"No... we're not allowed." He let's out a heavy breath.
"What do you mean? no one can make you..." Arin looks away, turning away giving me his back. I sit there quietly. I can't stay here that long... I'm already hungry and from the looks of it, there's no human food here, I won't last that long... maybe I can eat grass... no way, I'll get sick.
After a while of thinking, sun begins to set and I watch it from the window; trees and mist hiding almost all of the show. I'm taken back to reality by a loud banging. As if someone's pounding a metal pot in the hallways. Arin gets up and so does Ana.
"I don't wanna..." Ana pouts at Arin, using her childish tone for the first time since I met her. He pulls at her violently as she stands up.
"Let's not do this again. You know what's gonna happen if you start being a brat." He hisses at her. I walk over to them trying to ignore the loud banging.
"I won't run away, just don't let me eat... please." She begins to shed baby tears, her face crunching as she grows upset.
"What's wrong." I ask him. He glances up, lips pressed together in a twist.
"She really likes making this hard on me... Ana, stop it." He stresses tugging at her shoulder.
"You know what happened when you were missing this morning?" He shakes her angrily. He pulls his sleeve up, showing a nasty burn. I wince at the sight.
"I'm the one who got hurt and not you. Run away again and I swear I'll kill you." He threatens. I place my hand on his trying to calm him,
"Why did she run away? just talk to her nicely." I object. He pushes me away; pulling back down his sleeve.
"I promise I'll stay if you tell them I don't wanna eat..." Ana wails. Before I have time to comfort her, three men walk into the room, black rods in their hands.
"Didn't you hear the bell!? get moving!" They order. Ana wails even louder. One of the men walks over to her bringing his rod forward as it glows with electricity. Arin quickly places his body as shield and he falls to the ground convulsing after the collision with the electric rod. Placing my hands on my lips in shook as he calms down. He coughs and pushes himself up from the ground grunting.
"We're coming." He tells the armed men through gritted teeth. They glare around and glide out of the room. They look really bulky and strong, unlike Arin and the few people I saw around. I walk over to him,
"Are you okay? it doesn't hurt anymore right." I ask, wondering what was that for. They're all ghouls, why are they mean to each other.
"If you don't go eat, next time they come, I won't take the hit for you." He glares at Ana whose struggling with her hiccups. He glances over at me,
"Remember when I said act like a ghoul? now's the time. You better not cause a commotion; I'm not taking any more hits." He spits at me as he heads for the door. Ana grabs my hand and pulls me forward. I swallow moving forward.
The hallway filled with others, feet shuffling as everyone heads forward. The smell of mold and sweat fills the place. We enter a huge open plan area, people seated on the floor, some talking amongst each other as if it's just another normal day, and others who's eyes are wide bugging out, face sharp and stricken with fear. Arin walks over to an empty spot and sits on the floor, brushing his hands on his knees a couple of times. I sit next to him and so does Ana, her face paling, eyes wide glued on the floor and lips shrinking. There's plenty of those bulky guards around. Twenty of them surrounding the area, holding some type of circular object looking like a weapon other than the rods that are attached to their baggy trousers.
"What's going on?" I hiss at Arin. He glances at me, eyes darting around. I don't receive an answer, not sure if this is a bad situation or good because of the drastic difference between the people around. A loud whistle fills the room and everyone falls silent. I swallow down, sweat trickling my back. Two men walk forward, both pulling at a huge black plastic bag across the floor. The sound of heaving against the floor is the only thing echoing in the room. They stand next to a group of people in front of us, pulling something out of the bag and throwing it on the floor. Leaning around I still don't get a visual, but I'll soon learn what it is.
They walk over to us, pulling the black bag with them. It kind of.... smells.... I glance up at the men, dirt smudging their faces. One of the men pushes his hand down into the bag, brining it up and throwing a piece on the dirty floor. My eyes land on the piece, dark red, almost purple. Two other pieces accompany it on the floor, the size of a fist. Not too big not too small. Arin presses his lips tight, reaching out for one of the pieces, He hesitates and hands it to Ana. My head begins to throb. Arin pushes one of the pieces my way silently. I open my mouth to help pull in air into my lungs, my eyes glued on the red piece in front of me.
Why was I brought here... who did... who hates me so much to throw me here. Am I that annoying of a person... that I would be disposed of here? Almost consumed by grief, I jump at the figure stepping forward. At the corner of my eye, I watch as a guard stands next to us. His stance imposing and threatening. Arin nudges me, but my eyes are glued on the red piece. Any move and I'll loose my composure.
"What are you doing?" A rough thick voice escapes the man standing. Sweat drenched my hair, my palms, my clothes, everything.
"I will.... she's just.... uhh She's new here, I'll make sure she eats it." Arin speaks up, his voice wobbly. The man brings his foot forward, nudging the piece violently and it flies into my lap. It sits there, dirt sticking into it. Bile threatens to flow out of my lips, my heart beating so fast it might actually stop. The man huffs leaving our side.
"If you don't..." Arin begins whispering but loud shrieks stop him. We leer over as a women shouts crying as a guard stands before her,
"I can't!" She shouts from a distance. I can't see her face but hear her loud and clear; her voice echoing.
"I'll count to three!" The man bellows aiming his weapon at her, a round black circle, glowing in red.
"Today is my husband's turn... please.... just today. I can't" The women hollers. The guard shouts his numbers, and before anyone has the chance to riot, a loud shrill fills the room and the women falls silent. After a few minutes the man speaks up,
"Anyone else not feeling hungry!?" He hollers snickering. Crying or vomiting won't save me from this. Without a moment to think, I collect myself. Swallowing deeply, pulling my sleeve over my hand and looking up around, everyone is too busy staring at the guard. Every inch of my body hurts, inside and out; my limbs crying for me to not attempt it. But I do, hoping my heart won't quit pumping.
I quickly push the piece out of my lap; my eyes fixed up refusing to look back at it, pulling my dress up and throwing it under. Now the piece laying under me as I sit cross legged. Hands shaking I place a hand on my lips to shut the bile out. I glance over at Arin and he meets my eyes, he searches for my piece.
"What..." Arin questions in confusion. I place a finger on my lips to shush him. Ana holds the piece in her hand and before I could stop her she munches on it, shutting her eyes suppressing herself. Arin shakes his head and swallows it all in one go, pressing his hand on his knee. I close my eyes... this is nothing new to me, everyone knows it's gory here in the dot. I didn't expect anything less... still, this is a nightmare.
I push at my bangs out of my forehead, finding ocean sand falling down like dandruff. I need to leave now. This is no place to stay.
After we're allowed to leave the hall, I struggle a bit to pick the piece under my dress to leave peacefully and alive.
When we arrive to the room, I take the piece and dispose of it out of the window; chest heaving at the site and thoughts coming from that piece.
"We're leaving. Now." I prick at Arin. He jumps up from his mattress and walks over to me. We stare out the window, darkness fills the whole place, lights gleaming in the distance from the city on the other side.
"How? any ideas?" He asks me. I press my lips,
"Through the ocean." I let out. A sarcastic laugh escapes his lips,
"It's an idea. Do YOU have any." I press glaring at him. He shakes his head,
"I don't know how to swim." He presses. I wave my hand to dismiss his concern.
"How do the yearly ghouls leave? does a boat come for them?" I ask him, wishing I had asked Tora and Seigi about it... I hope Tora is okay... I shake my head trying to dismiss his bloody image.
"Uh... I don't know. No one's allowed to the shlocking shore on the day they get freed." He elaborates. Not allowed? of course, so no one sees the way out.
"But the dot is quite big... do guards stand all around the shore?" I ask,
"No, just in like... yeah, I think were I saw you attacking Ana. Around there I think." He tells me.
"I wasn't attacking her!" I defend myself. He shrugs plastering a slight smile.
"I'm glad I met you, you're the only one I can have a conversation with without wearing a mask." He tells me. I smirk flicking an imaginary hair strand.
"As a person from the outside, I can brag about taking regular showers." I prod and he smiles showing a set of jumbled teeth. I smile back.
"Tell me, are we allowed out? like the guards won't stop us right?" I ask him. He glances over at Ana who's sleeping... or pretending.
"Yeah, we can jump out of this window." He points. I huff laughing at his joke that I don't find funny, because I won't survive that, and there's nothing funny about my broken body.
"Let's get Ana to run away." I tell him. He stands straight glancing at the child.
"What... why?" He asks, the moonlight showing his frown.
"Since she's coming with us anyway, we can use her as an excuse to go look for her, to bring her back. Isn't that what you did today? you brought her back because she escaped?" I ask him. He hesitates but nods in agreement.
"Let's have her run away, and we follow her as an excuse." I tell him.